241. Embrace Healthy Perfectionism with Katherine Morgan Schafler #FabulousFriends

I’m excited to welcome Katherine Morgan Schafler to the show! She's a psychotherapist, writer, speaker, and the former onsite therapist at Google. She earned her bachelor's degree in psychology at UC Berkeley before obtaining two masters from Columbia University. Additionally, she completed her postgraduate training and certification at the Association of Spirituality and Psychotherapy in NYC. 

Today I'm bringing Katherine on to talk about her recently published book, The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control, which is designed to help you understand the different types of perfectionism, how your perfectionism can work for you, (not against you), and how to embrace it. We talk about the sociocultural issues ambitious women face, the importance of living in alignment with what you truly value, and how you can harness perfectionism in a healthy way to be your most authentic self. 

Having these conversations inspires me to take a beat and think about how I am being thoughtful with my days, my energy, and my time, and I’m so grateful to Katherine for sharing her professional advice with us. If you’re a fellow self-proclaimed perfectionist, make sure to take the perfectionist profile quiz on her website to understand your type, and pick up a copy of her new book, The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control, to learn more.

We also cover…

00:01:32 — Perfectionism Isn’t a Bad Thing

• Katherine’s career journey
• Read: The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control: A Path to Peace and Power
• The sociocultural issues with languaging used to describe women
• Maladaptive vs adaptive perfectionism
• Commercial wellness labeling perfectionism as “bad” when it isn’t
• Why high functioning people suffer from stress and depression 
• How to begin working through what doesn’t feel right in your life

00:19:44 — Living in Alignment with Your Values

• Pleasure’s role in finding what makes you happy
• The difference between immediate gratification and pleasure
• The connection between perfectionism and happiness
• Two questions Katherine encourages ambitious, high-achieving women to ask themselves
• Breaking the illusion of control

00:32:06 — How to Unleash Your Perfectionism in a Healthy Way

• The different types of perfectionism and each one’s advantages and liabilities 
• Take the perfectionist profile quiz: perfectionistsguide.com/quiz
• What types of perfectionists Kelly and Katherine are
• Dr. Kristin Neff's framework: 3 skills for responding to yourself compassionately
• Reframing the idea of productivity
• Manage Your Energy, Not Your Time by Tony Schwartz and Catherine McCarthy

Resources:

• Website: perfectionistsguide.com
• Read: The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control: A Path to Peace and Power by Katherine Morgan Schafler
• Take the quiz: perfectionistsguide.com/quiz
• Instagram: @katherinemorganschafler
• LinkedIn: Katherine Morgan Schafler

Connect with Kelly:

• kellyleveque.com
• Instagram: @bewellbykelly
• Facebook: www.facebook.com/bewellbykelly

Be Well By Kelly is produced by Crate Media.

Mentioned in this episode:

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