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The Weekend University

Breaking the Secret Cycle of Anger, Shame and Depression - Terry Real

Jun 16, 2023
Terry Real, a renowned family therapist and author, dives deep into the emotional struggles men face due to trauma and societal pressures. He discusses how these pains can lead to issues like self-medication and aggression, emphasizing the need for connection and vulnerability. Real critiques the damaging aspects of patriarchy and traditional masculinity, advocating for emotional expression in boys and re-empowerment for girls. He also shares practical therapy techniques to help men navigate shame and grandiosity, ultimately promoting healthier relationships.
45:58

Episode guests

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Quick takeaways

  • The podcast highlights how traditional masculinity fosters emotional disconnection in men, perpetuating patterns of hurt and isolation.
  • Therapeutic approaches that emphasize vulnerability and relational connectivity are essential for men's healing and personal growth.

Deep dives

The Cycle of Hurt in Men

Hurt people often perpetuate cycles of hurt, particularly in the context of men and boys. This dynamic is rooted in the emotional wounds inflicted on boys at a young age, causing them to become emotionally stunted and disconnected. Such wounds come from societal expectations and traditional notions of masculinity, which discourage emotional expression and vulnerability. Consequently, grown men often find themselves repeating patterns of emotional pain and disconnection, subsequently passing this hurt onto others.

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