What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood | Parenting Tips From Funny Moms

Do you have multiple groups of relatives who plan on spending the holidays with you? If you've got parents, in-laws, and other relatives competing for your time and attention, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.A listener asks:"How do you tackle splitting time between family over the holidays with a newborn? Both sets of grandparents live in the same town, but how do we decide that it's time to leave one place and go to the next? It's already tough keeping up eating and napping schedules."Margaret suggests making a detailed schedule for holiday time with each group of relatives and sharing it with everyone involved so no unpleasant surprises occur. And manage expectations for yourself and for your family around how many visits you'll be able to achieve with kids in tow. The holidays should be a time for family fun above all!Special thanks to our sponsor, Pampers:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Heather Chauvin is a leadership coach who helps ambitious, overwhelmed women break free from their fears to courageously and authentically live, work, and parent on their own terms. She’s the host of the podcast Emotionally Uncomfortable and the author of Dying To Be A Good Mother: How I Dropped the Guilt and Took Control of My Parenting and My Life. Heather explains: How a stage four cancer diagnosis changed her life's trajectory Her process of writing down desires rather than goals Why atomic habits are the key to success for busy moms Working towards your goals is a long game of tiny shifts, says Heather. It's not about waking up one day and moving to Bali to open a bar (although if that IS your dream, more power to you!) It's about taking one minute, then two, then ten, to make space for your desires not just as a wife and a mother but as a full human being.Here's where you can find Heather:https://heatherchauvin.com/IG: @heatherchauvin_Facebook: @heatherchauvincoachingListen to the "Emotionally Uncomfortable" podcastBuy Heather's book: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781774580226Take Heather's Energy Finder quiz: http://heatherchauvin.com/lifequizSpecial thanks to our sponsors for this month:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase.Aura Frames turns your family’s past into the perfect gift, bringing all your favorite photos and videos together in one high-resolution display. Get up to $30 off Aura’s best-selling frames at auraframes.com/FRESH. Terms and conditions apply.Author Accelerator’s Book Coach Certification program provides resources to help you launch your own thriving business coaching writers. Enroll in the program at bookcoaches.com/podcasts before December 31st to get $600 in book coaching extras.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. BetterHelp has matched 3 million people with professionally licensed and vetted therapists. Learn more and save 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/FRESH.For gifts of all kinds, Etsy has it. Use code MERRY10 at checkout for 10% off your first purchase at etsy.com.Gladskin is clinically proven skincare for people of all ages with eczema, acne, and rosacea. Get 15% off plus free shipping at gladskin.com/FRESH.Give Awesome this holiday with KiwiCo! Get your first month FREE on ANY crate line at kiwico.com/motherhood.Indeed is the only job site where you're guaranteed to find quality applicants that meet your must-have requirements--or else you don't pay! Visit indeed.com/LAUGHING to start hiring now.Prose is the healthy hair regimen with your name all over it. Take your FREE in-depth hair consultation and get 15% off your first order today! Go to prose.com/laughing. Rakuten is an online shopping platform that gives you Cash Back when you shop at thousands of merchants. Start shopping at rakuten.com or get the Rakuten app to start saving today.StoryWorth is an online service that helps you and your loved ones connect through sharing stories and memories and preserves them for years to come. Save $10 off your first purchase at storyworth.com/whatfreshhell Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Whether it's fish, feet, or ramen, our listeners have got some very odd things that they just can't stand. We discuss the breadth and depth of their very weirdest fears, along with our own aversions to the darndest things.Margaret and Amy discuss: Margaret's fear of grass and jazz Amy's rusty yoga poses The scariest Muppets Links! Babies refusing to stand on grass montage Join our Facebook group Sign up for the What Fresh Hell newsletter! Once a month you’ll get our favorite recent episodes, plus links to other things to read and watch and listen to, and upcoming special events: http://eepurl.com/h8ze3z Check out all of our Adalyst Media Network podcasts Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase.Aura Frames turns your family’s past into the perfect gift, bringing all your favorite photos and videos together in one high-resolution display. Get up to $30 off Aura’s best-selling frames at auraframes.com/FRESH. Terms and conditions apply.Author Accelerator’s Book Coach Certification program provides resources to help you launch your own thriving business coaching writers. Enroll in the program at bookcoaches.com/podcasts before December 31st to get $600 in book coaching extras.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. BetterHelp has matched 3 million people with professionally licensed and vetted therapists. Learn more and save 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/FRESH.For gifts of all kinds, Etsy has it. Use code MERRY10 at checkout for 10% off your first purchase at etsy.com.Gladskin is clinically proven skincare for people of all ages with eczema, acne, and rosacea. Get 15% off plus free shipping at gladskin.com/FRESH.Give Awesome this holiday with KiwiCo! Get your first month FREE on ANY crate line at kiwico.com/motherhood.Indeed is the only job site where you're guaranteed to find quality applicants that meet your must-have requirements--or else you don't pay! Visit indeed.com/LAUGHING to start hiring now.Prose is the healthy hair regimen with your name all over it. Take your FREE in-depth hair consultation and get 15% off your first order today! Go to prose.com/laughing.Rakuten is an online shopping platform that gives you Cash Back when you shop at thousands of merchants. Start shopping at rakuten.com or get the Rakuten app to start saving today.StoryWorth is an online service that helps you and your loved ones connect through sharing stories and memories and preserves them for years to come. Save $10 off your first purchase at storyworth.com/whatfreshhell Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If our kids seem standoffish at first when other adults try to engage them in conversation, parents may worry that such kids are missing essential social skills. This week a listener asks:"I'd love ideas on how to get your child to engage in normal back-and-forth conversation with adults. My four-year-old won’t respond to extended family or other adults when they try to talk her her. No “Hello," no “Thank you”, etc.If the adults engage in play with her, then she will be very chatty. But this morning she wouldn’t respond when her own father said ”Good morning."This is probably totally age-appropriate, and she's a happy, well-adjusted kid, but she struggles with this. I’ve been trying to practice and prep her with how to respond before events, but that hasn’t made much progress."Amy assures our listener that this behavior is both age-appropriate and worth having a discussion about. Put your child in the driver's seat with a little role play, practicing both initiating conversation and responding to prompts. And remember that it's totally okay if your kid takes a while to warm up to others - better giving them space than forcing them into uncomfortable social situations. There's plenty of time for the latter when they become adults.Special thanks to our sponsor, Pampers:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ever heard of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs? Maslow proposed a pyramid as the pattern through which human needs and motivations generally move. We can't worry about what's at the upper levels of the pyramid until and unless the more basic needs at the bottom of the pyramid– food, warmth, safety– are met first.Leslie Forde, founder of Mom’s Hierarchy of Needs, has rethought that pyramid for the way we live our lives as mothers. There's a reason there's not enough bandwidth in our lives for fun and connection and self-actualization. Mom’s Hierarchy of Needs provides moms with products, research and community to reclaim time from their never-done to-do lists.In this episode, Leslie explains: Why mom's hierarchy of needs is a little different than Maslow's When and why your hierarchy of needs might shift How to prioritize your career, healthy relationships, and self-care in your own hierarchy Leslie says that it's important to realize your health and wellbeing is equal in importance to your children's health and wellbeing, and once you internalize that, you can start to make room for your own needs without feeling guilty or frivolous.Here's where you can find Leslie: Facebook: @MOMSHIERARCHYOFNEEDS Twitter: @MOMSHIERARCHY IG: @MOMSHIERARCHYOF_NEEDS Leslie's TimeCheck app https://momshierarchyofneeds.com/ Our episode "Isn't This Supposed to Be More Fun?"Sign up for the What Fresh Hell newsletter! Once a month you’ll get our favorite recent episodes, plus links to other things to read and watch and listen to, and upcoming special events: http://eepurl.com/h8ze3zSpecial thanks to our sponsors for this month:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase.Aura Frames turns your family’s past into the perfect gift, bringing all your favorite photos and videos together in one high-resolution display. Get up to $30 off Aura’s best-selling frames at auraframes.com/FRESH. Terms and conditions apply.Author Accelerator’s Book Coach Certification program provides resources to help you launch your own thriving business coaching writers. Enroll in the program at bookcoaches.com/podcasts before December 31st to get $600 in book coaching extras.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. BetterHelp has matched 3 million people with professionally licensed and vetted therapists. Learn more and save 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/FRESH.For gifts of all kinds, Etsy has it. Use code MERRY10 at checkout for 10% off your first purchase at etsy.com.Find a new fall favorite for your wardrobe with Faherty. Head to fahertybrand.com/wfh and use code WFH at checkout for 20% off.Gladskin is clinically proven skincare for people of all ages with eczema, acne, and rosacea. Get 15% off plus free shipping at gladskin.com/FRESH.Give Awesome this holiday with KiwiCo! Get your first month FREE on ANY crate line at kiwico.com/motherhood.Indeed is the only job site where you're guaranteed to find quality applicants that meet your must-have requirements--or else you don't pay! Visit indeed.com/LAUGHING to start hiring now.Prose is the healthy hair regimen with your name all over it. Take your FREE in-depth hair consultation and get 15% off your first order today! Go to prose.com/laughing. Rakuten is an online shopping platform that gives you Cash Back when you shop at thousands of merchants. Start shopping at rakuten.com or get the Rakuten app to start saving today.StoryWorth is an online service that helps you and your loved ones connect through sharing stories and memories and preserves them for years to come. Save $10 off your first purchase at storyworth.com/whatfreshhell Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Do us a solid! Take our listener survey at bit.ly/whatfreshhellsurvey.When parenting feels like all work and no play, we may resignedly think "Well, that's the way it's supposed to be." But if you feel like parenting is more draining than fulfilling, there are ways to bring more presence, joy, and fun into the mix.Amy and Margaret discuss: why having fun as a family usually means doing what kids think is fun, which is not the same as US having fun what psychologists say is required in order to have fun- and why those same things can be in short supply in our lives as parents the role of "flow" in fun, and whether eight hours of video games might start to have diminishing returns Sometimes parenting isn't fun. The reasons for that aren't our fault, and losing the guilt that it's not all more fun can really help. On the other hand, if it's never fun, there might be some rearrangements of our family life that can occur... and we've got ideas on how to start.Links! Jennifer Senior: All Joy And No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenthood Daniel Gilbert: Stumbling on Happiness Mikhail Csikszentmihalyi: Flow Arlie Hochschild: The Second Shift Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/fresh and get on your way to being your best self.”For gifts of all kinds, Etsy has it. Use code MERRY10 at checkout for 10% off your first purchase at etsy.com.Find a new fall favorite for your wardrobe with Faherty. Head to fahertybrand.com/wfh and use code WFH at checkout for 20% off.Gladskin is clinically proven skincare for people of all ages with eczema, acne, and rosacea. Get 15% off plus free shipping at gladskin.com/FRESH.Honeylove shapewear is the secret sauce you need for your everyday wardrobe. Get 20% off at honeylove.com with the code FRESH.Give Awesome this holiday with KiwiCo! Get your first month FREE on ANY crate line at kiwico.com/motherhood.Indeed is the only job site where you're guaranteed to find quality applicants that meet your must-have requirements--or else you don't pay! Visit indeed.com/LAUGHING to start hiring now.Rakuten is an online shopping platform that gives you Cash Back when you shop at thousands of merchants. Start shopping at rakuten.com or get the Rakuten app to start saving today. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Does your kid ask you to make their breakfast or do their laundry despite the fact that they know how to do these things? Where's the line between lending them a hand and waiting on them hand and foot?Listener Lindsay asks:"Talk to me about how you field requests from your kids to “help them” with things they’re old enough to do themselves. Like my 12 year old’s constant requests to make her breakfast, or my 6 year old who will often ask me to go fetch things for her that she forgot elsewhere in the house. I will often decline and tell them that they can do these things themselves… but then I wonder — couldn’t they say the same thing to me when I ask them for help? They’re always very willing to help me when I ask, and I know they are probably looking at these requests of me in the same light. How do I reciprocate their willingness to help me without teaching them learned helplessness? "There's no hard-and-fast rule for how much your kids should be doing around the house. As long as you contextualize the scenarios where you help for your kids, there's no harm in sometimes doing things for them if they're bogged down with homework or having a rough day.Links! Children's Hospital of Philadelphia blog: "Chores and Kids: How Much Should You Expect?"Special thanks to our sponsor, Pampers:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why does it feel like our career and our family are pulling us in different directions and making it hard to be fully present in both arenas? In her new book Work, Parent, Thrive: 12 Science-Backed Strategies to Ditch Guilt, Manage Overwhelm, and Grow Connection (When Everything Feels Like too Much). Dr. Yael Schonbrun explains how we can move from a zero-sum mindset to a life in which our work life and our family life are enable to enrich each other.Yael Schonbrun is also the co-host of the "Psychologists Off the Clock" podcast, an assistant professor at Brown University, and a mother of three little comedians. In this episode Yael and Amy discuss: Why the guilt that often accompanies parenting is hard-wired into us What values clarification looks like Why starting a "stop doing" list can be surprisingly helpful Here's where you can find Yael: Twitter: @DrYaelSchonbrun#WorkParentThriveBuy Yael's book: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781611809657Links! Our Fresh Take with Dr. Jill Stoddard on how to manage anxietySpecial thanks to our sponsors for this month:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/fresh and get on your way to being your best self.”For gifts of all kinds, Etsy has it. Use code MERRY10 at checkout for 10% off your first purchase at etsy.com.Find a new fall favorite for your wardrobe with Faherty. Head to fahertybrand.com/fresh and use code FRESH at checkout for 20% off.Gladskin is clinically proven skincare for people of all ages with eczema, acne, and rosacea. Get 15% off plus free shipping at gladskin.com/FRESH.Honeylove shapewear is the secret sauce you need for your everyday wardrobe. Get 20% off at honeylove.com with the code FRESH.Give Awesome this holiday with KiwiCo! Get your first month FREE on ANY crate line at kiwico.com/fresh.Indeed is the only job site where you're guaranteed to find quality applicants that meet your must-have requirements--or else you don't pay! Visit indeed.com/LAUGHING to start hiring now.Rakuten is an online shopping platform that gives you Cash Back when you shop at thousands of merchants. Start shopping at rakuten.com or get the Rakuten app to start saving today. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Please take our listener survey at bit.ly/whatfreshhellsurvey! It helps us bring you sponsors you'll love– and it keeps this podcast going!When we look at our kids– and think of the responsibilities we had and risks we took at their ages– a lot of us think our kids are growing up more slowly. This is definitely not always a bad thing. But when our kid is playing Pokémon and their peers have moved on to Snapchat, should we be encouraging them to blossom? Or letting them stay young a little longer?Amy and Margaret discuss: why it's good to have "young" kids when to rescue, and when to leave them alone how to make our own homes safe havens for our kids to be exactly who they are Links! Camille Noe Pagán for WebMD: "Is It Immaturity or ADHD?" Alloprof Parents: "5 ways to support an immature first grader" PsychCentral: "The Effects of Trauma from Growing up Too Fast" Amy Norton for CBS News: "Why today's teens are growing up more slowly than they used to" Katie Bishop for BBC: "Kids getting older younger: Are children growing up too fast?" Steven Richfield for HealthyPlace: "Coaching The Emotionally Immature Middle Schooler" Julie Rawe for Understood: "Why some kids seem immature compared to other kids their age" Dr. Tori Cordiano for Your Teen Magazine: "My Daughter Is Immature and She’s Annoying Her Friends" Jessica Lahey for Your Teen Magazine: "Understanding Changing Middle School Friendships" Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/fresh and get on your way to being your best self.”For gifts of all kinds, Etsy has it. Use code MERRY10 at checkout for 10% off your first purchase at etsy.com.Find a new fall favorite for your wardrobe with Faherty. Head to fahertybrand.com/fresh and use code FRESH at checkout for 20% off.Gladskin is clinically proven skincare for people of all ages with eczema, acne, and rosacea. Get 15% off plus free shipping at gladskin.com/FRESH.Honeylove shapewear is the secret sauce you need for your everyday wardrobe. Get 20% off at honeylove.com with the code FRESH.Give Awesome this holiday with KiwiCo! Get your first month FREE on ANY crate line at kiwico.com/fresh.Indeed is the only job site where you're guaranteed to find quality applicants that meet your must-have requirements--or else you don't pay! Visit indeed.com/LAUGHING to start hiring now.Rakuten is an online shopping platform that gives you Cash Back when you shop at thousands of merchants. Start shopping at rakuten.com or get the Rakuten app to start saving today. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When our kids get overwhelmed with homework and tests and schedule-making, it can be pretty clear they need our help. Sometimes they come right out and ask for assistance– only to then angrily insist every suggestion we make is the dumbest thing ever. How can we support our stressed kids without being trash cans for all their frustration and bad feelings?A member of our Facebook group says:My family moved last spring to a new school district with higher standards than our previous one. Our teen is really having a hard time understanding how to manage his time. I know he has all the tools and support to be successful, so the only thing holding him back is his own effort/attitude. He procrastinates and bargains his way into doing the least possible effort and then when I check in with him to review or to help plan his assignments he snarls at me. He is in this cycle of not wanting to do the work or the task in the moment, and then getting pissed later that he essentially set himself up to struggle. We let him make his own study plans for the first six weeks with us just supporting his choices where we could, but that resulted in poor grades. Then we would force him to let us help him study, and he would be much more successful. He just fights the help. So I have 2 options: A- say “fine, go ahead and do it your way and fail your classes” which will result in many consequences I fear that he is not mature enough to think about, or B- keep taking the abuse and fighting him, knowing that it’s the only way he will stay on track which is definitely not the healthiest means to an end. It's a tough situation a parent to be in, and hard not to become triggered by it. Amy says it's important to remember that our kids are struggling with two different things– their workloads, and their anxieties– and that their frustrations are about those things, not about how annoying Mom is. No matter what they might say.Books Amy mentions in the episode:THE EXPLOSIVE CHILD by Ross GreeneSMART BUT SCATTERED TEENS by Richard Guare, Peg Dawson, and Colin GuareSpecial thanks to our sponsor, Pampers:For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning rewards with every diaper & wipes purchase. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices