Ask Margaret: How Do I Choose Between Conflicting Kids' Events?

When you have more than one kid event in your calendar, how do you hit both– or choose one and live with your kid's disappointment? A listener in our Facebook group asks:

"Moms with multiple children: how do you handle the anxiety, guilt, and disappointment when kids' activities overlap? I’m not talking about missing one of the bajillion 4th grade basketball games. I mean the once-a-year or even once-every-few-years very important events.

How do you decide which child’s event is more important ? How do moms do this without feeling absolutely guilt-ridden and sad? It’s an impossible situation to be in and I’m feeling paralyzed."

The most important thing you can do is talk about these issues as a group and problem-solve together. Can the parents split up the event duties? Can another relative, friend, or neighbor step in? If you're doing your best to make your kid feel supported, not just by you but by the other people in their tribe, then you can let yourself off the hook for not showing up to every single event - yes, even the important ones.

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