Death on the Daily

Today I reflect on the profound lessons that I learned from accompanying my Grandad through his final year.  I opens my heart to share 7 invaluable lessons that witnessing my Grandad journey taught me about life, love, and the courage it takes to sit with discomfort. I filmed this one day after the 2 year anniversary of my Grandad dying. Recounting my weekly visits to his care home, including moments of silence, discomfort, and compassionate presence. How these visits transformed my understanding of both holding space for others and navigating my own complex emotions. Takeaways Being present opens us to joy and love. Meeting others where they are is crucial. Silence can foster deeper connections. Discomfort can lead to profound moments. Love your loved ones like tomorrow may never come. Joy can coexist with grief and pain. Never take time with loved ones for granted. Constant action distracts from true connection. Finding comfort in silence is a valuable skill. Grief can teach us about resilience and love. Whether you’re caring for a loved one, grieving, or simply seeking to live a more mindful life, these lessons are for us all.  Support Death on the Daily: Don’t forget to rate and subscribe to this pod - it really helps me to get the word out. Instagram: instagram.com/death_onthedaily The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission.  You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.  This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com

Palliative Care Chaplain and host of Dying To Tell You Podcast, Cody Hufstedler, joins me today as we explore what death and dying can teach us about living well.  Cody shares his journey to becoming a palliative care chaplain, the misconceptions surrounding palliative care and hospice, the emotional challenges faced in hospital settings, and the importance of taking the time you need to make thoughtful decisions during challenging moments.  We also speak to the lessons we can learn from those facing the end of life. Including living intentionally, focussing on what truly matters, finding meaning in simplicity, guarding against regret and understanding your personal values. Cody is a gem, who has created an incredible platform to share the stories and wisdom of the dying. If this episode resonates with you, then make sure you check out some of the conversations that he speaks to here. The links are below.   Key Takeaways When diagnosed with a serious illness, priorities become clear. Conversations about death can illuminate how to live well. Palliative care is about comfort and quality of life. You can slow down decision-making in hospitals. Fear should not drive medical decisions. Intergenerational relationships provide valuable life lessons. Stories from the dying can teach us about living. Living intentionally is crucial for a fulfilling life.  Simplicity can bring clarity to what is truly important. Experiencing life fully now can prevent future regrets. Understanding personal values is crucial for decision-making. Self-awareness helps in managing emotional responses during crises. Choosing to focus on joy and compassion can change outcomes. It's essential to communicate what needs to be said now. Recognising personal triggers can lead to better interactions with others. Living in the moment can enhance the quality of life. Everything is impermanent; embrace the present. Follow Death on the Daily: Don’t forget to rate, review and subscribe to this pod Instagram: instagram.com/death_onthedaily Where you can connect with Cody Hufstedler: Instagram: instagram.com/dttypod/ TikTok: tiktok.com/@dying.to.tell.you Website: dttypodcast.com/ Dying To Tell You (DTTY) Podcast is on Apple and Spotify Listen to the stories that Cody mentioned:  Linda’s episode Denise’s episode Deanna’s episode The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission.  You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.  This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com Chapters 00:00: The Clarity of Mortality 03:03: Cody's Journey to Palliative Care 05:58: Understanding Palliative Care 08:55: Navigating Hospital Experiences 12:12: The Importance of Decision-Making 15:06: Living Well Until the End 18:00: Advice for Facing Life-Changing Diagnoses 20:54: The Role of Values in Decision-Making 24:10: Stories of Life and Death 28:57: Letting Go of Material Attachments 31:50: Finding Meaning in Simplicity 33:54: Guarding Against Regret 36:19: The Importance of Values 38:40: Knowing Yourself in Crisis 44:39: Choosing a Different Path 49:29: Reassurance in Uncertainty

I am joined today by Wilka Roig, to explore the multifaceted relationship that we humans have with death, grief, and our mortality. We discuss death activism, how we can reconnect to the natural cycles of life and death, where our fear of death comes from, the necessity of community support in navigating grief, and simple practices to connect into death on the daily.  Wilka emphasises the need for cultural shifts to embrace death as a part of life, encouraging you to reflect on their own experiences with loss and simple practices so that you can start to understand your fears and connect into death on the daily. I took so much from our conversation, and hope that you will too. Takeaways Death is seen as a mystery, but it is a part of life and we are dying symbolically all the time. We are not born with a fear of death; it develops over time. Death activism is crucial for societal change. Cultural shifts are needed to reconnect with our mortality. Grief is a natural part of the human experience. We can learn from our fears and engage with them. Community support is essential in the dying process. We need to honor small losses to prepare for larger ones. Death and life are reciprocal; one feeds the other. We can navigate grief and loss with greater awareness and presence. Follow Death on the Daily: Don’t forget to rate, review and subscribe to this pod Instagram: www.instagram.com/death_onthedaily Where you can connect with Wilka Roig: Instagram: www.instagram.com/wilka_roig/ Website: wilkaroig.com Train with Wilka at Espacio Fim (ESFIM): espaciofim.com/ Listen to Wilka’s podcast on Spotify (in Puerto Rican Spanish): Vivir la muerte con Wilka y Alex The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission.  You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.  This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com

In this solo episode of Death on the Daily, we look at the cultural traditions surrounding death, focusing on festivals that are being celebrated this week; Halloween, Samhain and Dia de Muertos (Day of the Dead).  We look at ways that these celebrations help us connect with our ancestors and embrace the cycle of life and death. What inspiration you can take from them not just now, but throughout the year. Through remembrance rituals and finding joy in the memories of those you’ve lost, while also rooting into your ancestry and creativity to navigate your relationship with death. Takeaways Death is a natural part of life that we all face. Cultural traditions can help us understand and accept death. Samhain marks the transition from life to death in nature. Dia de Muertos celebrates the return of the dead to their families. Rituals of remembrance can bridge the gap between the living and the dead. Finding joy in memories can help us cope with loss. Nature provides a powerful entry point to connect with death. Inviting loved ones' presence into our lives can aid in healing. Celebrating death can be a vibrant and joyful experience. Rooting into ancestry can inspire personal rituals around death. Follow Death on the Daily: Don’t forget to rate, review and subscribe to this pod Instagram: @death_onthedaily The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission.  You can connect with Katie and her music and work here katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.  This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com

In today’s solo episode of Death on the Daily, I dive into the topic of mental health. Looking at our societal conditioning that sees vulnerability as a weakness, and how society’s pressures to appear “strong” can prevent us from expressing our true feelings.  With a call to break the silence, she encourages listeners to approach mental health as we do physical health—without judgment or shame. Sharing how I’m learning to practice daily self-compassion. Plus introducing five essential check-in practices, designed to help us pause, listen, and honour our mental state. These include being honest with how we’re feeling, establishing healthy boundaries, and finding moments to celebrate small wins. You are not alone - Mental Health Support (UK based): Mind Samaritans CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) If outside the UK, search online for support services. Let's connect: Don’t forget to rate, review and subscribe to this pod Instagram: @death_onthedaily The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission.  You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.  This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com

CW: This episode includes discussion and personal shares about death by suicide.  Always remember you are not alone and there are people who you can talk to. If you need someone to talk to, in the UK you can call Samaritans 24/7 on 116 123.  Melissa Maouris joins me today to speak about her personal story and loss of her Stepmother Sue. Speaking to themes that are so often unspoken including grief, suicide, mental health and the power of holding space for others, checking in, and showing our vulnerability.  We explore Mel’s personal experiences with loss, the societal stigma surrounding suicide, and the importance of open conversations about mental health.  Emphasising the need to feel and express complex emotions. We also speak to the role of community support in healing and the necessity of breaking the silence surrounding mental health issues, particularly for young men who often feel pressured to suppress their emotions.  Key takeaways Suicide is a societal issue, not just a personal one. Grief is a significant part of the human experience that is often ignored. It's essential to feel and express grief fully, including anger. Community support is crucial in navigating grief and loss. Numbing emotions can prevent us from feeling love and connection. Open conversations about suicide can help reduce stigma. Vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness. Sharing personal experiences can create connections and support. We need to encourage emotional expression, especially among young men. Recognising vulnerability is a true power. Compassionate connections can help individuals express their truth. Reparenting can help challenge inherited narratives about death. Creating space for emotions is crucial for healing. Follow Death on the Daily: Don’t forget to rate, review and subscribe to this pod Instagram: @death_onthedaily Where you can connect with Mel: Instagram: @melissamaouris Reparenting Podcast: on Spotify or Apple Website: www.melissamaouris.com Work with Mel: Inner Child Programme - https://mailchi.mp/melissamaouris/reparentyourinnerchild  The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission.  You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.  This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com

Let’s talk about death and the importance of planning for each of our inevitable endings. In today’s episode of personal anecdotes and reflections, I share the significance of embracing impermanence, the necessity of advanced care planning, and the empowerment that comes from articulating one's wishes for end-of-life care and beyond.  Encouraging you to join me in starting to take steps into this process - that isn’t as scary as it seems. Including in getting creative as you express your desires for your funeral (trust me on this one, it's more fun than it sounds...).  Takeaways What's most important to you in those final moments? Everything in this life is impermanent. We need to be planning for our end of life. This process can be really empowering. There are lots of resources online to help you in dying and death planning.  Advanced Care Planning in the UK  Resources:  Hospice UK Advanced Care Planning UK Lasting Power of Attorney UK Disclaimer:  I am a coach and death doula, not a licensed therapist. The support and guidance I provide are not a substitute for professional therapy or counselling. If you require, please seek help from a qualified therapist or counsellor. I'm grateful to Tripp and Jessica who have set up a special discount code just for you. If you feel inspired to get your own Deadbook, use DEATHDAILY15 at checkout for 15% off your purchase. Find The Dead Book at thedeadbook.co Subscribe and connect with me: * You can support me by subscribing to this podcast, plus rating and reviewing.   * Instagram: @death_onthedaily ⁠⁠⁠⁠ The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission.  You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.  This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com

In this episode of Death on the Daily, I’m joined by Tripp and Jessica Tillery, co-founders of The Deadbook. We explore how planning and conversations around our wishes for our death and our estates can bring peace, clarity, and a sense of empowerment. Discussing how this truly is one of the greatest gifts we can leave to our loved ones at a time when they need space to grieve. Plus how essential it really is, since you know... 100% of us will die in the end. We dive into the emotional and practical steps of preparing for the inevitable and offer insights on how you can navigate these often-avoided topics, from talking with young children to tackling estate logistics. We discuss: * The cultural aversion to death and its impact on families. * Why it's crucial to start conversations about death early, even with kids. * Practical tips for beginning estate planning, including discussing emotional fears and logistical needs. * The importance of organising your wishes to avoid family strife, confusion and lots of work to untangle everything after your death. * How The Deadbook can help make this process simple, approachable and… even enjoyable (trust me on that one). * Final words of wisdom for those ready to take the first step toward planning for death with grace. Disclaimer: I am a coach and death doula, not a licensed therapist. The support and guidance I provide are not a substitute for professional therapy or counselling. If you require, please seek help from a qualified therapist or counsellor. I'm grateful to Tripp and Jessica who have set up a special discount code just for you. If you feel inspired to get your own Deadbook, use DEATHDAILY15 at checkout for 15% off your purchase. Find The Dead Book at https://thedeadbook.co Follow @thedeadbook.co on Instagram and TikTok: * Instagram: www.instagram.com/thedeadbook.co/ * TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@thedeadbook.co Subscribe and connect with me: * Subscribe to this channel and podcast:  @deathonthedaily  * Instagram: ⁠www.⁠⁠⁠⁠instagram.com/death_onthedaily ⁠⁠⁠⁠ * YouTube: Death on the Daily The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission. You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com

In honour of Baby Loss Awareness Week, which is 9-15 October. I share more of my own journey of grief after losing my daughter, Ngākau Raiona. I speak to the importance of integrating joy and love alongside sorrow. Plus the need to break the silence surrounding baby loss, the power of community support, and the significance of allowing space for grief.  I also discuss the healing power of rituals and the importance of supporting one another through loss, concluding with a heartfelt note to self and an invitation to honour lost babies. With 1 in 4 pregnancies ending in miscarriage, a figure which doesn't include other baby loss. This is an important area of loss that we should all be aware of. Takeaways Grief and joy can coexist in our experiences. Community support is vital in navigating loss. Breaking the silence around baby loss is essential. There is no timeline for grief; it is a personal journey. Rituals can help in processing grief and honouring loss. Expressing grief is a form of honouring love. We must hold space for others' grief without trying to fix it. Sharing stories of loss can alleviate feelings of isolation. Acknowledging the existence of lost babies is important for healing. SUBSCRIBE TO MY PODCAST: ‪Death on the Daily CONNECT WITH ME ON INSTAGRAM: ⁠www.⁠⁠⁠⁠instagram.com/death_onthedaily ⁠⁠⁠⁠ The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission. You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com

In this heartfelt conversation, I speak with Jessica Fein, author of 'Breath Taking: A Memoir of Family, Dreams and Broken Genes.' In a conversation that honours and celebrates her daughter Dalia, who faced a rare degenerative mitochondrial disease that meant she sadly died at the age of 17. Jessica shared so profoundly how she navigated the challenges of raising a child with a life-limiting illness, the strength of her partnership with her husband Rob, and the unique dynamics of family life with their three children shaped by love, joy, pain, loss, and resilience. We discussed the profound impact that Dalia had on so many in her short life. Plus challenges of parenthood, how and the importance of finding beauty and joy amidst sorrow and grief.  Jessica shares important lessons for us all that she learned from Dalia, including the significance of listening deeply for what our loved ones need, and the impact of creating moments of beauty in difficult times.  Key takeaways The pathway to adoption.  Finding joy in difficult circumstances.  Listening to loved ones can reveal their true needs. Sorrow and joy can coexist in our lives. Open communication strengthens relationships during tough times. The significance of giving each other space in relationships.  The deep, unbreakable bond of siblings and how their presence shapes each others lives.  Showing our children that it’s ok to be broken - a shift that profoundly impacted Jessica’s family’s emotional healing.  Creating moments of beauty is vital in challenging situations. Dalia’s enduring ripple effect - her joy and kindness continuing to inspire others after her death.  Disclaimer: I am a coach and death doula, not a licensed therapist. The support and guidance I provide are not a substitute for professional therapy or counselling. If you require, please seek help from a qualified therapist or counsellor. Subscribe to my podcast Death on the Daily Connect with me on Instagram: www.⁠⁠⁠⁠instagram.com/death_onthedaily ⁠⁠⁠ Jessica Fein's book 'Breath Taking: A Memoir of Family, Dreams and Broken Genes' is out now. Find out more about Jessica, her book, Substack and work here: www.jessicafeinstories.com Connect with Jessica Fein on Instagram: www.instagram.com/feinjessica Connect with Jessica Fein on Facebook: www.facebook.com/jessica.fein.92/ The theme music for Death on the Daily is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Set Free by Katie Gray⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, which is used with artist's permission. You can connect with Katie and her music and work here ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.katiegray.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. This podcast is edited by David Strutt, who you can contact here for any editing needs: davidstrutt2@gmail.com