

Smeared Mascara
Smeared Mascara Podcast
"Laugh with us, cry with us, smear your mascara with us."This podcast is hosted by longtime friends, Mandy and Brooke who have been born and bred in the San Francisco Bay Area. These ladies love themselves some pop culture and drama which probably stems from their latchkey kid beginnings. Their main news source is social media but their strong opinions always find their way into the conversation. The topics are fueled by unmedicated ADHD and the language is always spicy. So sit back and listen to your new favorite pop culture podcast, Smeared Mascara!
Episodes
Mentioned books

Jun 10, 2025 • 1h 2min
Sports Illustrated Fashion Show
Send us a textGet ready to smize and work the runway with Brooke and Mandy. This week the ladies talk about the beautiful and diverse bodies of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Fashion Show, eighth grade audacity, and all things pop culture. Real-time reactions to the college softball World Series can be heard in the background which ultimately set the pace for this episode. Enjoy the return of Kiss or Miss, and hear the latest recommendations in streaming and TikToks. Yes, we are still talking about hot dogs. So bust out your yearbooks and beg us to sign them while you enjoy the latest episode of Smeared Mascara. Don’t forget, the language is vulgar and descriptive!TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Jun 1, 2025 • 1h 9min
Memorial Day
Send us a textThis episode was recorded on Memorial Day of 2025. Brooke and Mandy discuss how blessed they are to be alive during this time of equal rights and economic prosperity. <<record scratch>> Okay, jump in the DeLorean and get back to reality. The ladies discuss everything from softball supers to the latest in tv and TikTok. Of course Hulu’s Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is a topic this week.Be sure to notice the loud truck exhaust sound in this episode. One of our locals decided to express their insecurities, I mean confidence, by revving their engine repeatedly. You’ll be receiving your weekly dose of pop culture and profanity in this episode of Smeared Mascara. You’re welcome. Rated MFR for Muthafuccin Rage TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

May 22, 2025 • 49min
Diddy Really Done Did It
Send us a textWe solemnly swear to judge pop culture, politics, and any other topics we see fit. Join us in the Smeared Mascara courtroom, won’t you? The Honorable Judges Brooke and Mandy are serving unsolicited opinions and lewks.Listen to the ladies recap their weekends. Brooke witnesses geriatric drama, and Mandy visits the suburban version of Chuck E. Cheese. Sporty Spice News returns, and Possessed Doll Corner premiers. Of course, the disgusting Diddy trial is discussed. Court is adjourned. You may now listen to the episode with Doug Lewelling in the lobby. (Gen Z, that’s an OG People’s Court reference)Language is inappropriate and nasty as you should expect. Rated TFB for Tammy Fay BakerTikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

May 20, 2025 • 55min
Pope for Aaron Parnas
Send us a textWelcome back to Smeared Mascara, the religious and political podcast. (Insert record scratch) Just kidding! There’s mention of these taboo dinner party topics but in the way that gets you sent to hell. This week the ladies recap their Mother’s Day activities and how hashtag blessed they are. Did YOU take your kid to an anime convention over an hour away like Mandy did??? Brooke tells us about a concert she attended and how she avoided funk with a fellow attendee. We also hear about Brooke’s birthday getaway to the coast with her mans. Of course the latest in pop culture is featured in this episode. Details are emerging from the Diddy trial. Turns out he’s even more disgusting than previously believed! The Pope be popin’ and politicians aren’t hiding their drug use like the old days. Grab your AirPods and put the kids to bed because the show is about to start! The language is vulgar. Rated DGAF because it’s the truth. TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

May 13, 2025 • 39min
Met Gala
Send us a textThis week Brooke and Mandy use their finest screenshots gathered from the World Wide Web to discuss The Met Gala. Get dandy with us, won’t you?It’s also an early birthday celebration for B-Rock. Hear how she plans on spending this milestone day. Conclave Couture could make an appearance. Mandy is crushed over the conclusion of The Righteous Gemstones. Jesus take the wheel because this girl is not okay. Grab some face tape and get snatched because it’s time to listen to Smeared Mascara. Language is mature, disturbing, and c#nty. Proceed with confidence or see your way out. TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

May 7, 2025 • 1h 9min
Sh!t Talking & Sandwiches
Send us a textThe ladies of Smeared Mascara are back and ready to talk some smack!Warning: Strong opinions are shared about sandwiches, movies, concerts, and podcasts. Clips of Katy Perry’s latest stage show are hitting socials and viewers confused. Does space travel decrease a human’s ability to perform? Our sources say maybe. TikToks showcasing Cowboy Carter concert lewks are being posted and some are creative AF. Extensions on a tshirt??? Okayyyy!! **Booty cheek chaps are always welcome**The language is nasty per Smeared Mascara standards. If you don’t like filthy you’re in the wrong place.Grab your hobby horse and get dandy, because the show is about to begin! TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Apr 24, 2025 • 57min
New Pope. Who dis?
Send us a textThis week’s episode of Smeared Mascara focuses on the three Cs: Coachella, Conclave and Chisme.Find out details from Mandy’s festival field correspondent, and what this reveals about Gen Z.Brooke gives us a behind the scenes story about Beauty School Fight Club. It’s as intense as that blue mascara from the 80s. Pop in those AirPods and tune out the world because Smeared Mascara is gonna teach you a few things. Warning: This episode contains spoilers to The Righteous Gemstones, and blasphemy. Of course the language is vulgar af. Are you new here? (If so, welcome! If not, duh!)TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Apr 16, 2025 • 1h 2min
Coachella - Week 1
Send us a textPut on your shorty shorts and your flower crown because we’re headed to Coachella! Actually Brooke and Mandy are reporting about Coachella via social media. Did you really expect these babes to travel during the school year? In this economy?The ladies hypothesize the logistics of possible festival hookups, and navigating the desert landscape in a wheelchair. Brooke tells us about her return to the softball fields, and Mandy gives us her honest review of the movie Freaky Tales.All that and so much more on this episode of Smeared Mascara.PLEASE be cautious when listening to this episode. The language gets nas-tay. Don’t say we didn’t warn you!TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Apr 10, 2025 • 1h 24min
Bachlorette, Protest, and White Lotus
Send us a text**This episode contains SPOILERS for the season 3 finale of White Lotus**This week Brooke and Mandy talk about the nationwide protest that took place over the weekend. The signs were signing and the people are pissed.Mandy spills the tea about a bachelorette party in wine country. Lessons were learned, and memories were made.Both ladies give their opinions about the last episode of The White Lotus. What should have happened, what could have happened, and what really happened. There’s also discussion about the latest prom trends in the south, and the stock market. Please don’t take any investment advice from us. Seriously. So grab your smoothie with the “good” coconut milk and enjoy the latest episode of Smeared Mascara!Rated AV for Always Vulgar TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel

Apr 3, 2025 • 1h 12min
Eat Your Cannolis
Send us a textThis episode is popping with pop culture. Brooke and Mandy have a mature discussion about appendages and Italian desserts. The ladies also talk about the challenges of raising Gen Z-ers, “remixing” your life, and their current favorite streaming shows.This is definitely not the episode to listen with your kids or conservative friends. It’s giving the sex, drugs and HBO MAX vibe. So stop doom scrolling and start listening to the latest installment of Smeared Mascara!TikTokInstagramYouTube Channel


