The Kevin Miller Podcast

I’m wrapping up my series on Laura Tremaine, host of the 10 Things To Tell You podcast and author of The Life Council: 10 Friends Every Woman Needs. Our focus is on friendships, but vastly elevating them from mere peripheral benefits, “if we have time.” A point I’m expounding on in this series is we don’t need friendships to survive. We need them to thrive. So if thriving is your goal, this is a vital topic. Normally on this part four episode, I briefly discuss lessons I’m learning or grappling with from the series we’ve done. ⁣⁣Here, I take a detour. Instead of my solo commentary, I brought two dear friends into the studio with me to talk candidly about how we’d been doing friendships, the value we had been receiving, and…how we could do them better. Main focal points that surfaced were the need to protect and enhance friendships, just like we do our health and money. ⁣⁣My friends and co-hosts are…two guys at the top of their field in just those areas, health and money. Randy James. Who you hear often as my co-host on the Functional Friday episodes. Randy is a medical doctor and functional medicine expert. People pay him out of pocket to get to the root issues of their problems and not simply prescribe a medication to a symptom. Randy and I have lived in the same town and been friends for over a decade, growing our kids together, adventuring together, and we partnered together in a business six years ago and have shared offices ever since. Some weeks we are together 5 days in a row, sharing lunch on the back deck of the office. Find him at truelifemedicine.com. ⁣⁣My other dear friend featured in this episode is Patrick Johnson. Randy and I met Patrick together four or five years ago and found a kindred spirit in health and wellness, adventuring, family, and spiritually. Patrick is a personal, fiduciary financial counselor who works with very high net worth individuals. But Patrick goes way beyond that. He’s become a unicorn in his profession because he goes deep with clients into maximizing the overall wealth of their life, no different than Randy. Or me. Patrick was a professional river and mountain guide; seminarian; organic farmer, and he’s an author. He leads a large group of men in Colorado on epic adventures. You can find him at WellthPartner.com. We all spend a lot of time together. We live within a two mile radius of each other. We go on big adventures together. So coming together to discuss the topic of friendships just felt too legitimate to me. ⁣⁣You’re about to hear a different start to an episode, as again, we are literally sitting side by side in my studio together, and we start off sharing a beverage together, just as we do when tailgating in the mountains after a big adventure. Props to Patrick for this tradition. He knows how to instigate inspiring environments. ⁣⁣June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to ziglar.com/coachsummit⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code KEVIN and depending on the model receive UP TO 39% off or UP TO $300 off!Get free chicken thighs for a year and $20 off your first box when you sign up today at butcherbox.com/SELFHELPFUL and use code SELFHELPFUL. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Friends, when I first started writing my new book, What Drives You, I sat down with some influential people to get their stories. I wanted to know what took them from, wherever they started, to realize the significant achievements that landed them on my show. ⁣⁣Dr Benjamin Hardy is a favorite guest of mine, he's a prolific writer of best-selling non-fiction in the self-help space because he's a great writer, of great research. His books, Willpower Doesn't Work and Personality Isn't Permanent are foundational messages I come back to time and time again. ⁣⁣Not long after I signed my book deal, I had Ben on my podcast, which was called The Ziglar Show at the time. He had shared a tidbit of personal story that grabbed my attention...so I brought him on to dig in. What he shared violated much of what I'd previously thought about drive and was a great depiction of what I'd learned and was writing in my book. ⁣⁣Ultimately the story here is what I used as the lead off story in chapter one of my new book, What Drives You, which is just now coming out. Ben's story is an incredible depiction of a primary myth I bust, of some people being driven and some people not. Even some having more drive than others. It's just not true. Listen in to hear more. ⁣⁣June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to ziglar.com/coachsummit⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code KEVIN and depending on the model receive UP TO 39% off or UP TO $300 off!Get free chicken thighs for a year and $20 off your first box when you sign up today at butcherbox.com/SELFHELPFUL and use code SELFHELPFUL. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There are two options for gaining the valuable relationships you want and need to have a rich, fulfilling existence. Before I tell you though, there is a foundational assumption that must be met regardless, and we actually didn’t address it in this episode, so I want to cover it here. ⁣⁣You must have exposure. I find many people who lack friendships also don’t get much exposure to people, and especially new people. I won’t belabor this but I’ve found the absolute number one way to achieve this is get in groups of kindred spirits. Take an interest you have and get around other people with that same interest. ⁣⁣And coworkers may not fit. Working at the same place is not the same interest. Neither is family for that matter. I’m talking to literally know what you are interested in, curious about, inspired by, and find other people who are as well. After that…the two options for accumulating valuable relationships are either instigating them, or, making friends with an instigator. ⁣⁣This is Part 3 of my discussion on Laura Tremaine host of the 10 Things To Tell You podcast and author of her most recent book, The Life Council: 10 Friends Every Woman Needs. My focus is on the friends everyone needs, women and men. ⁣⁣To round out our discussion I invited Brianna Brown Keen on to co-host the discussion. Brianna Brown Keen is an accomplished actress, appearing in more than 20 feature films and 30 television shows. Along with being a present day, working actress, Brianna has produced an initiative and book called Manifesting Your Mission where she guides entrepreneurs, including a lot of people in show business, in making true progress toward your goals. ⁣⁣Brianna is a relationship instigator, and we talk about what this looks like. But if you hear Brianna and feel you are not a fit for being an instigator, then I want you to hear your focus is to befriend…an instigator. Find a Brianna in your life, even if it’s as a paid part of a community or mastermind as Brianna leads. ⁣⁣June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to ziglar.com/coachsummit⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month. Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code KEVIN and depending on the model receive UP TO 39% off or UP TO $300 off!Get free chicken thighs for a year and $20 off your first box when you sign up today at butcherbox.com/SELFHELPFUL and use code SELFHELPFUL. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When we look back on who we were five years ago, even more so 10 years ago, we recognize ourselves as very different people today. Yet today we think who we are is really…who we are. But in five years you’ll look back to yourself, right now, and realize how much you’ve changed. ⁣⁣So think to what was normal for you five or ten years ago? What was normal, that you don’t do at all now? If you are growing and evolving, things will have changed. So…how about today? What is normal to you right now, that doesn’t have to be? That for your best wellness, probably shouldn’t be? ⁣⁣The power is in realizing we as people have such a hard time shifting from what is normal to us right now. What is normal is comfortable. It’s secure. To change it requires decision-making, discipline, and to a great degree it’s simply a hassle. And we live lives with little margin and a hassle, even a seemingly little hassle, feels like a big obstacle. ⁣⁣This is our Functional Friday episode and I’m with Randy James, Medical Doctor and Functional Medicine expert and we discuss some of the normal maladies that have been normalized in our culture. Not because they are ok, but we’ve just made peace with them. If you want long-term wellness, this is not a good peace. But changing them for the better is not ultimately that hard, it’s just that initial shift to create a new normal, that once we do…is fairly easy. ⁣⁣June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to z i g l a r . c o m / c o a c h s u m m i t⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Friends, many of you have listened to this podcast for many years. You’ve listened to me dig into the stories and messages of over 200 of our world’s most profound and important influencers in the self-help space. You listened as I hosted The Ziglar Show and went from 50,000 listeners to over 300,000, then as we transitioned to the Self-Helpful show and grew to over 600,000 listeners. We’ve had over 60 million downloads and are ranked in the top 1.5% of all podcasts on the planet. ⁣⁣So first…thank you. Along the way of this journey, you’ve heard some of my own story and much of my own perspective on self-help. With the size of my audience I had been approached about writing a book, but it wasn’t until a couple years ago I felt driven…to actually write one. What Drives You: How to Discover Your Unique Motivators and Accelerate Growth in Work and Life, published by McGraw Hill, releases May 10, 2023 on Amazon, and you can pre-order now. ⁣⁣While it’s popular to offer bonuses and incentives to pre-order, because it helps with Amazon rankings, I’m going to refrain for now. At the end of the day, the bonus is you find something in the book that elevates your experience of…everything. Of life at large. ⁣⁣In this episode I’m going to briefly tell you what the book is intended to offer you. I give big focus to two primary myths we have about drive. Then I lead you through the key areas of life, the same ones I lead every guest through, and guide you to creating healthy and strong drive in each area.A great premise to the book is the endorsement on the back cover from Jordan Harbinger, host of the Jordan Harbinger Show which often ranks in the top 50 of all podcasts in America, ⁣"Everyone is enamored with habits, but having good habits assumes you have the core motives and drive to create, implement, and sustain them. What Drives You is really the prequel to habits, as it helps you establish your why, which is what actually drives what you will and won't ever do.⁣ This book should be required reading for anyone desiring to actually improve themselves." You can go find What Drives You by me, Kevin Miller, on Amazon right now, and for insight on the book, stay tuned and I’ll give you a tutorial on what you can expect to gain from it. ⁣⁣June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to z i g l a r . c o m / c o a c h s u m m i t⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In my experience with myself, and with others, when we seek out another human we do so like a heat-seeking missile. We seldom, if ever…stop. And ask what we are wanting from the interaction. Often it’s merely transactional. Sometimes this is ok, in the workplace especially. But even then, whenever we want the best and most from someone we will serve them and ourselves well if we connect. And we can connect best with them when we again, pause for a moment, and connect with ourselves. How are we feeling about us? How are we feeling about the person we are about to approach? What are we wanting from the interaction? I’m back with Laura Tremaine, host of the 10 Things To Tell You podcast and author of her most recent book, The Life Council: 10 Friends Every Woman Needs. As you heard us cover in part one, friendships are, or can be, our life source. Here we continue the conversation as I walk with her through her Values, Motives, and Habits in the key areas of life fulfillment. It’s on the topic of relationships where Laura cites she works to connect with herself before she can connect with others. We dig into that, and cover other subjects. Spiritually Laura talks about coming to Christianity, and today fully embracing Jesus, but not the religion of Christianity, which I sure can relate to. Her health and wellness is a challenge and she shares how she came to a place and realized she’d lived her entire life from the neck up, and really has to work at caring for her body, as she cares for her mind. Regarding mindset I asked Laura where she needs to watch out most, and she said she can tend to “Catastrophize” everything. On an interesting note, her husband Jeff is a television and film director, producer, and screenwriter and is best known for co-creating the reality stunt show Jackass with Spike Jonze and Johnny Knoxville. June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to z i g l a r . c o m / c o a c h s u m m i tGo to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all know relationships are ultimately what we desire most. This is where we get the most happiness and fulfillment. Yet we generally don’t make friendships a priority, and as you’re about to hear, there is a high chance you have been doing friendships…wrong. This episode is intended to give you a new perspective on how to look at friendships, and go about them, and get clear on what you are hoping to get from them. ⁣⁣My guest is Laura Tremaine, host of the 10 Things To Tell You podcast and author of Share Your Stuff. I’ll Go First. Laura worked in film and television production for many years at MTV, VH1, Fox, and Paramount Pictures before pursuing writing full time. She writes primarily to women about friendship, anxiety, motherhood, and marriage. But her new book, The Life Council: 10 Friends Every Woman Needs, got my attention. ⁣⁣I appreciate Laura’s focus on women, but I recognized the need for this message on Friends is relevant to everyone. To me. My primary interest that you’ll hear us dive into is how we tend to put way too much pressure on one or two friendships, like our spouse or a best friend, and a main point of Laura’s book is how our relational needs are meant to be filled by multiple friendships. ⁣⁣But another significant topic we cover is what friendship is really supposed to be about. It’s not just for fun and support, but literal guidance and counsel, and few of us are allowing friendships to be this for us. ⁣⁣June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to z i g l a r . c o m / c o a c h s u m m i t⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all spend a lot of time listening to wise counsel. Getting guidance. Gleaning great information and trying to apply it to our lives. Sometimes however, what is most inspiring is simply to hear from others on the same journey we are. The good, the bad and the ugly. Which is ultimately, hopeful. ⁣⁣I asked the Self-Helpful audience this question, “What area of your health do you feel good about and what area do you not?” What followed were many personal testimonies of strengths and weaknesses in everyone’s personal wellness pursuit. ⁣⁣Some of the deficits and struggles cited and discussed were on the topics of hydration, weight, exercise, alcohol, and more. We also delved into more complex issues of cholesterol, biotoxin illness, chronic fatigue, mental health and the all encompassing reality that the answers for our individual health are just that…very, very individual. ⁣⁣June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to z i g l a r . c o m / c o a c h s u m m i t⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In our series on stoicism, I kept coming back to the aspect of control. Controlling our emotions. Controlling our reactions. Controlling our internal world so as to not be controlled by the outer world. ⁣⁣It’s a valid perspective, but then I was reminded that I don’t actually want control any more than I want money. I just want what money can hopefully buy. Likewise, I just want what control can hopefully afford me. And the word that surfaced was…harmony. ⁣⁣I often find myself saying I want peace, but I struggle with that sounding like I just want life to be easy and stress free, which is not the case. I want the trials and challenges that are so fulfilling to overcome. I want the hero story. But within the ups and down, I want to feel a balance and a rhythm I understand, which is what harmony is. ⁣⁣A definition of harmony I greatly appreciate is, an interweaving of different accounts into a single narrative. Our daily life in this world is made up of different accounts of so many things. The stoic way of life is a life devoted to a commitment to a single narrative amongst all those accounts. ⁣⁣But don’t get caught up in the word stoic. It is an example of a clarified and committed mindset and way of life. You don’t have to give it a name, but to find success you will want to decide upon your own way of life and have it clearly defined. ⁣⁣June 15-16 of 2023 I’ll be in Dallas to attend and speak at the Ziglar coach summit, alongside Tom Ziglar. If you are looking to influence people for the better, professionally or personally, I invite you to join us. First 10 people who register and say you heard about it from me, I’m taking to dinner! Go to ziglar.com/coachsummit⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.For a limited time, Self Helpful listeners can get 20% off InsideTracker’s new Ultimate Plan. Visit InsideTracker.com/helpful.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What’s the difference between a hero and a villain? Virtue. Which is defined as, “Behavior showing high moral standards.” Having a purpose for good as opposed to evil, or even just others as opposed to self alone. We love the character who is resolute upon doing the right thing and seeing it through no matter what. ⁣⁣We spend billions of dollars on superhero stories that depict this. People didn’t tear up at the end of The Avengers: Endgame when Ironman dies just because a battle is won. It’s because it was a battle for good. ⁣⁣We’ve been studying stoicism which is based on virtue, and from this, a decided way of life. In truth it’s the rare individual who actually outlines and commits to a clarified way of life. I feel most people want to be good, and at heart, they are. But without intention we go about our days being swayed by the culture and circumstances. ⁣⁣This is part three of my series on Tanner Campbell and his rapidly growing podcast, Practical Stoicism. People are flocking to it and I believe this is why; they are longing for meaning, purpose, and to know what they are about. Stoicism is just that, knowing what you are about. ⁣⁣I invited Tom Ziglar to discuss this with me. Tom is son of Zig Ziglar, CEO of Ziglar Inc., and renowned author, speaker and coach. And my dear friend. The Ziglar way is just that, a decided way of life. One of virtue, honor, trust, and faith. ⁣⁣Right at the beginning Tom quips that after hearing my initial talk with Tanner, he now feels, “He’s a stoic and he didn’t know it.” We talk about living out virtue, faith, religion, self-control, and integrity. Tom also discusses five aspects of trust, which we both believe is our greatest asset. ⁣The Self-Help(ful) podcast is brought to you by Ziglar, your premier source for equipping coaches to help leaders and top performers excel professionally and personally. Visit Ziglar.com and let them inspire your true coaching performance.⁣Go to Zocdoc.com/KEVIN and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.Get 20% off the entire InsideTracker store when you sign up at insidetracker.com/HELPFUL.If you’re looking for a simpler and cost-effective supplement routine, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/SELFHELP.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/selfhelpful today to get 10% off your first month.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices