Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay

To learn more about the resources and information that Mona Kay has available you can check out her website at: neurodiverselove.com__________________________________________________________During this episode with Sadie and her mom Lynn they share how unknown neurodivergence impacted Sadie's childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood, In addition, they address the topics below:Terrible two's.Sensory overload and meltdowns. Restrictive eating and sensitivities.Not understanding why you are so different as a child.Masking in school and being different at home.Expectations in school were more structured and easier to understand.Overwhelm during high school and changes in social rules.Being diagnosed with an auto-immune disease in high school.Stimming at home and walking in circles helps with nervous system regulation,Having a spiky profile. When younger, being able to socialize better with adults. Being a perfectionist and the struggle with some things that others do automatically. Challenges with learning to drive and driving…being “perceived” by other drivers.Masking and then having no spoons after school.Giftedness.  Different ways that children may process and develop language.

If you would like to learn more about the resources Mona offers you can click here. In addition, if you would like to join the new community that Mona is creating for non-autistic/neurotypical partners called "Neurodiverse Love Conversations" click here to register for the 4 week series that will be held every Thursday from June 5th-June 26th from 7-8:30-pm EST (US). The cost is ONLY $149 and each participant will get the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards and Workbook and lifetime access to the 2023 and 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference sessions. If you are trying to make sense of how two people could love each other yet repeatedly misunderstand and hurt each other, then this community is for you. If you are repeatedly confused and don't understand why conflict, contempt or stonewalling have become more the norm than the type of connection and attunement you are looking for then this community is where you will find understanding, tools and strategies that can help you work towards achieving more peace and joy in your relationship and life!Spaces are limited, so if you feel called to join this supportive community I hope you will register today!____________________________________________________________This podcast episode was originally published on Jodi Carlton’s podcast called “YOUR Neurodiverse Relationship” and is a conversation between Jodi Carlton, Mona Kay and Michael Daniel, the developer of the "Neurotranslator" and his wife Elise.The goal for sharing this episode on the "Neurodiverse Love" podcast is to spread information about the life-changing Neurotranslator app and to highlight the story behind its creator and the challenges he and his wife had been experiencing before learning he was neurodivergent.The topics addressed in this episode include:How having children changed everythingLearning about neurodivergence through a child’s diagnosis Communication challenges Being high masking in life and marriageHow misunderstandings contributed to conflictUnmaskingUnderstanding your identity after learning you are neurodivergent Reliving trauma through a neurodiverse lensHow ability to function can change after diagnosisAutistic burnoutSituational mutismAbleismWishing you could have a husband with a NT brainHow the “NeuroTranslator” was born Both partners need to work to understand each otherYou can learn more about the Neurotranslator app here

Lori Crowley, M.A., LMFT, LPCC is a therapist and coach who works with neurodivergent families and couples.  During this episode she shares some of her lived experiences and her expertise as well as the importance of taking a somatic approach to psychotherapy. We discuss so many important issues for neurodiverse couples to understand and addresss including:​How to integrate sensory differences.​Dealing with sensory overwhelm.​Neurons that fire together wire together.​Sensory resourcing.​Understanding all of our senses including vestibular, neuroception, and interoception.​Understanding being sensory seeking, sensory avoidant, neutral or a combination.​Brain story on Neuroclastic website​Logicalizing or invalidating emotions.​“Toward” energy and “Away” Energy.​Rewiring your neural pathways.​Double empathy problem.​Changing the frame in which we are holding our experiences.​Opposites can “complete” each other.​Is it a “can’t” or a “won’t”?​Overwhelm, lack of agency/choice and sense of imminent demise can lead to trauma.​How do I repair?  1) Create safety in the environment: Person you are interacting with needs to be seen.  Look at them through a sensory lens: 2) They need to be heard.  Hold what comes at you; 3) Teding-people want to feel respected. This can help the other person’s energy relax.  Remember not to say “but”, however you can say “and”.​Unpacking some of the sensory issues in play that led to Mona moving forward on a divorce.​Understanding if it’s overwhelm or lack of care?​Understand that repair may not be possible, however forgiveness can be very healing.You can contact Lori for therapy here or for coaching here.If you missed the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference you can still buy "lifetime access" to the 31 sessions and the 4 recorded Q&A sessions. To buy access to the conference sessions or to learn more about the presentation topics, presenters and the bonuses you will receive click here.You can click here also learn more about the other resources Mona offers or at the links below: Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards or WorkbookNewsletter | Instagram | Website | YouTube

Mike Matthews, a hospital supply chain worker diagnosed with autism later in life, shares the profound impact of his condition on his family. Alongside Amy Matthews, a mental health therapist, they discuss their challenging journey through misdiagnosis and the struggle for appropriate support. They explore the realities of autistic burnout, parenting amidst sensory needs, and the importance of a neuro-affirming household. Their candid conversation sheds light on the unique strengths and challenges of their neurodiverse relationship.

In this engaging conversation, Robin Tate, a life and relationship coach specializing in neurodivergent adults, delves into the intricacies of AuDHD. She discusses the important self-discovery process for women and the nuances between Autism and ADHD. Listeners learn about executive functioning challenges that affect communication and daily tasks. Robin highlights the emotional journey of grieving potential relationship dynamics while addressing the impact of masking. This insightful dialogue offers valuable strategies for fostering interdependency in neurodiverse relationships.

During this episode Mona Kay and her sister Ilysa talk about how so many things they experienced in their childhood began to make sense once they realized their father was Autistic (possibly AuDHD). Although their father passed away 20 years ago, the insights this understanding has brought have helped heal childhood wounds and bring understanding to dynamics in their family of origin and they have both learned more about how unidentified neurodivergence impacted the men they chose to love.Mona and Ilysa also talk about how their father made friends around special interests; not following through on his promises because of overwhelm; deep dives into lots of special interests; the importance of routines; sensory challenges that led to meltdowns; food preferences; smoking 3 pack of cigarettes a day and taking Valium; masking; dealing with the emotions of all his female family members; being financially secure and a good provider; choosing comfortable clothes to wear to work; black and white thinking; cutting family members off rather then dealing with emotions or conflict; being very blunt and the "unintentional" hurt; challenges with implementing boundaries; and mindblindness.If you are interested in learning more about the resources Mona offers you can check out her website at: www.neurodiverselove.com

If you didn't have a chance to join us at the phenomenal 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference you can still learn from the more than 30 presenters who shared their lessons learned, lived experiences and expertise. For ONLY $97 you can get "lifetime access" to all 31 conference sessions and the 4 recorded Q&A panels. To begin watching the conference sessions today, or to get more information about the conference presentations and presenters click here.___________________________________________________________During this episode with coach Magi Nock we talk about ways to create more joy, safety and connection in your neurodiverse relationship. We also address the following: Accepting and acknowledging that the differences exist;Addressing grief that is unique to each partner; Compassion towards what is happening in your relationship;Cultivating curiosity about each others perspective;The bigger the trauma the more expanded your support system may need to be;Having tools and people to turn to when your dysregulated;Co-creating connection in unique ways;Finding unique ways to communicate;Understanding that you each  can “choose” to stay in the relationship;There is hope and possibility for change. You can contact Magi and learn more about her coaching services here Neurodiverse Coaching

The 2nd Virtual Neurodiverse Love Conference will be held on March 6th-8th, 2025. All the sessions are recorded, so even if you are not able to join us live you will get "lifetime access" to ALL 31 phenomental sessions!If you use the discount code Mona50 you will also receive $50 off the ticket price and the investment is ONLY $47! In addition, you will get some amazing FREE BONUSES WORTH OVER $120. To learn more about the sessions and to register click hereIf you have any questions about the conference please send an email to: neurodiverselove4u@gmail.com____________________________________________________________During this podcast episode you will learn more about the "predictive processing framework" (PPF) from Autistic therapist, Sarah Bergenfield. Sarah shares why understanding this framework is so important and how learning more about it can positively impact any neurodiverse relationship. Sarah talks about the ways in which the PPF impacts social interactions, sensory processing, physical intimacy, routines, socializing, and change. This discussion will help increase your understanding of some the challenges you may be experiencing in your neurodiverse relationship and can help both partners create more connection, have more more grace, and possibly heal some emotional wounds and "unintentional' hurt.If you would like to contact Sarah please check out her website here.If you would like to learn more about the Neurodiverse Love Documentary click here.

Jana M. Smith, a resilience coach specializing in nervous system regulation, shares her journey overcoming chronic health issues through brain rewiring. She discusses essential tools for managing undiagnosed ADHD and emotional dysregulation in relationships. Topics include the fight-or-flight response, sensory sensitivities, and how negativity bias can keep us stuck. Jana emphasizes the significance of expanding our 'window of tolerance' in neurodiverse partnerships, highlighting the importance of mutual understanding and effective communication.

I am SO excited to be hosting the 2nd Virtual Neurodiverse Love Conference from March 6-8th, 2025. Check out the list of presenters and sessions topics at: www.neurodiverselove.com You can register here using the discount code Mona50 to get $50 off the ticket price. In addition, you’ll get 3 FREE BONUSES worth more than $120.! All the sessions are recorded and everyone who registers will have lifetime access to all 31 sessions!!!During this episode, I have an opportunity to talk with Greg and Michelle Fuqua about their mixed neurotype marriage (Autistic/ADHD) and their journey together. More specifically we discuss:- How they met and what attracted them to each other. - Miscommunication and early triggers.- Challenges before knowing they were a neurodiverse couple.- Limited capacity to work a full-time job.- Addressing the need for autonomy.- Challenges after having kids.- Emotional barriers to protect oneself.- Cognitive dissonance. - Reframing experiences with a neurodivergent partner and child.- Not taking things so personally.- The benefit of individual therapy.- Improvements in communication. - Neglect and abandonment triggers.- Being able to communicate challenges clearly.- The importance of doing the work individually and as a couple.- Creating emotional safety for each other.- Loving each other for their differences.- Shame triggers.- What they would have changed that they now know caused the other unintentional hurt.- The importance of taking care of yourself.