Shrink For The Shy Guy

Transforming confidence is possible, no matter how long you've struggled. It's a skill that requires consistent action, not just hope. Facing uncomfortable situations can lead to lasting change. While transformation may take longer than expected, true confidence becomes a way of life. Dr. Aziz shares practical steps and inspiring client stories to guide you on this journey. Embracing the process and community support can amplify your growth, making confidence a reachable goal.

Discover how to transform rejection from a source of shame into neutral information. Learn to embrace daily setbacks as learning experiences while managing your emotional responses. Engage in a guided mindfulness exercise to connect with your feelings through breathwork. Dive into the healing power of self-affirmation and recognize your inherent worth, independent of external validation. This journey fosters confidence, inner peace, and self-acceptance, leaving you empowered to face rejection with newfound resilience.

Rejection can feel like a heavy weight, especially for those with social anxiety or people-pleasing tendencies. The discussion unveils hidden patterns that shape our fear, urging listeners to reframe their perceptions of rejection. Key insights reveal how avoiding rejection limits life experiences rather than protecting us. Aziz introduces the concept of recognizing default rejection patterns as the first step toward transformation. Learn to embrace self-worth and reclaim your power to live boldly, free from the sting of rejection.

Discover the transformative power of valuing the journey over outcomes. Embrace the process in fitness, relationships, and self-discovery to find true joy. Learn how focusing on growth rather than results can enhance your sense of purpose. Explore the illusion of permanent happiness and understand that satisfaction lies in your experiences, not just in achieving goals. With personal anecdotes, uncover how enthusiasm can spark transformation and deepen your engagement with life.

Discover the strange secret to becoming more likable by embracing authenticity! It’s not about flashy techniques, but rather showing your true self. Explore how vulnerability can transform your connections and let go of the fear of judgment. Personal stories highlight the magic of being open and real. Whether you're tackling social anxiety or seeking deeper bonds, this conversation reveals how simple changes can drastically enhance your likability and foster genuine relationships.

I'm excited to share with you the second principle of sanity and victory—a concept that can help you feel more free from anxiety, stress, and worrying about what others think. These principles are designed to bring you a sense of peace while empowering you to create the life you want, which is the ultimate victory. In this episode, we dive into the power of surrender. What does it mean to surrender, and how can it become the ultimate life skill for you? I'll explain the meaning behind this principle and how it helps you flow with life, free yourself from unnecessary suffering, and stay calm, even in challenging circumstances. I'll also show you how to avoid the trap of thinking you need everything to go a certain way to feel okay, and how to let go of that need for control. If you're looking to feel less weighed down by life's demands and more empowered, this episode is for you. So, let's explore how surrender can bring you more freedom and joy, and set you up for victory.   ---------------------------------------------------------------   As a reminder, sanity, in this context, refers to a sense of peace and the ability to flow with life without sabotaging your well-being. Victory, on the other hand, is about breaking through challenges and becoming who you are truly meant to be. These principles are here to guide you towards both. Principle #2: Surrender Is the Ultimate Life Skill "Surrender to the divine flow is the ultimate life skill. Not my will, but thy will. I remember the fundamental error that I need something out there to be exactly a certain way in order to feel okay in here. Peace is available right now. I'm okay either way. All I need is within me now. I accept the current painting as it is and calmly walk into an entirely different room." Unpacking the Principle Surrender vs. Giving Up: When we hear the word "surrender," it’s common to associate it with defeat. However, true surrender means submitting to a greater force, allowing life to unfold without forcing our will upon it. It’s about trusting the process and recognizing that we don’t always need to control every aspect of our lives. The Divine Flow: This principle encourages you to connect with the divine flow—whether that’s a spiritual belief, the universe, or simply the natural progression of life. Understanding that life is happening for you, not to you, can alleviate the burden of needing everything to go your way. Accepting Reality: One of the biggest challenges we face is the belief that we need certain outcomes to feel okay. This fundamental error leads to suffering. We often say, “If only this person liked me,” or “If only I had that job,” then I would be happy. This attachment to specific outcomes traps us in a cycle of anxiety. Finding Peace Now: The statement "peace is available right now" reminds us that we can find calm within ourselves regardless of external circumstances. By shifting our focus inward and acknowledging that our worth does not depend on external validation, we can cultivate a sense of peace. Accepting the Current Painting: Imagine your life as a gallery filled with paintings representing different aspects of your existence. Instead of fixating on the ones you dislike, accept them as they are and choose to explore other rooms in your gallery. This metaphor illustrates the importance of recognizing your current circumstances without being bogged down by them. Applying the Principle in Your Life Now that we’ve unpacked this principle, let’s explore how you can integrate it into your daily routine. Time for Action: Embrace Surrender Your action step today is to practice surrender. Here’s how you can do this: Reflect on Your Attachments: Identify areas in your life where you feel anxious or stressed. Ask yourself what specific outcomes you’re attached to and how they affect your emotional state. Practice Acceptance: Take a moment to sit quietly and breathe deeply. Repeat the mantra, “I am okay either way.” Feel the weight of your attachments lifting as you accept your current circumstances. Engage with the Present: Each day, find a small moment to consciously surrender. This could be letting go of a minor annoyance or frustration. Notice how this shift affects your overall mood and well-being. Utilize Guided Resources: Consider listening to the guided audio exercises mentioned in previous episodes. These resources can help reinforce your practice of surrender and acceptance. As we conclude this episode, remember that surrendering to the divine flow doesn’t mean giving up on your goals. It means embracing the journey and allowing life to unfold as it should. By practicing this principle, you can cultivate a deeper sense of peace and freedom, empowering you to navigate life with grace and confidence.Join me next time as we continue our exploration of the Eight Principles of Sanity and Victory. Until then, may you have the courage to surrender and embrace the flow of life, knowing that all you need is within you now. Thank you for being here!

Join Dr. Aziz as he shares powerful tools, insights, and practical steps he's discovered over 15+ years of helping people conquer their fears and embrace their bold, authentic selves. In this special series, you’ll dive into the "Eight Principles of Sanity and Victory," designed to help you master your mindset, reclaim control, and thrive in all areas of your life. Each episode breaks down one principle, packed with real-life examples, action steps, and practical strategies you can apply immediately. Whether you're battling self-doubt, fear of rejection, or just want to feel more in control of your life, you’ll find inspiration, guidance, and encouragement here. You are the captain of your ship, and it’s time to steer it toward the life you truly deserve. Let's do this!   -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   Hello and welcome! I’m thrilled to have you here today as we embark on an exciting journey over the next few episodes. We’ll be exploring the Eight Principles of Sanity and Victory—powerful tools designed to help you reclaim your life and build a profound sense of confidence. So, whether you’re seeking to overcome anxiety, enhance your relationships, or find greater purpose, you’re in the right place. The Journey Begins Before we dive into the first principle, I want to take a moment to share the purpose behind this series. My mission—Operation Divine Liberation—is to empower as many people as possible to live fully and authentically. It’s about moving beyond survival mode and into a life of thriving, where you don’t just survive to the end, but truly experience every moment as rich and fulfilling. A Call for Support Now, I need to ask you for a small favor. If you’re finding value in this podcast, I would greatly appreciate it if you could leave a review. Your feedback helps me reach more people and spread this mission further. Thank you for your support! Introducing the Eight Principles Today, we’ll kick off our exploration with the first of the Eight Principles of Sanity and Victory. This principle emerged from my journey of self-reflection, especially as I approached 43 years of age. It’s a reminder that as we navigate life’s challenges, we can choose to steer our own ship rather than be tossed around by the waves of circumstance. Principle #1: I Am the Captain of My Ship "My suffering isn't in my circumstances, but in how I'm steering. I alone am responsible for my state." This principle is foundational for several reasons: Personal Responsibility: It reminds us that we have the power to choose our responses to life’s events. Whether you’re facing rejection, failure, or feelings of inadequacy, you can control how you navigate those emotions. Perspective Shift: When we claim our role as the captain, we start to see our challenges not as burdens but as opportunities for growth. It allows us to step back and realize that our suffering often comes from our reactions rather than our circumstances. Empowerment: Acknowledging that we are in charge of our lives is liberating. It frees us from the narrative that we are victims of our situations, allowing us to take proactive steps toward change. Navigating the Waves of Life Let’s break this down further. When faced with failure or rejection, it’s easy to slip into a negative mindset and view ourselves as inadequate. You might find yourself saying, “I’m not enough” or “I’ll never succeed.” These thoughts can feel overwhelming, but it’s crucial to remember that they are just thoughts—not facts. What to Do Instead: Recognize Your Feelings: Acknowledge the feelings of inadequacy when they arise, but don’t let them define you. It’s okay to feel this way; what matters is how you respond to those feelings. Take Ownership: Instead of blaming external factors, take a moment to reflect on your actions and choices. Ask yourself: “What can I learn from this experience?” or “How can I steer my ship differently next time?” Set Your Course: Establish a vision for where you want to go. Your goals and aspirations can serve as the guiding stars for your journey. With clarity of purpose, you can navigate through life’s storms with greater confidence. Your Action Step: Claim Your Choice To solidify this principle in your life, I encourage you to take action today. Repeat this mantra to yourself: “I am the captain of my ship.” Say it out loud, write it down, and remind yourself daily. This simple act can serve as a powerful reminder of your agency and strength. Closing Thoughts As we wrap up this episode, remember that you have the power to steer your life in the direction you desire. Embrace the challenges as opportunities for growth, and don’t hesitate to reach out for support along the way. Together, we can navigate through life’s complexities with courage and grace. Join me in the next episode as we continue exploring the Eight Principles of Sanity and Victory. Until then, may you have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you are enough. Thank you for tuning in!

Welcome to today's episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy! You are brave for clicking on this one because today we're tackling the gruesome three—failure, rejection, and not-enoughness. As we approach Halloween, it's time for some real horror stories—those emotions we avoid like the plague, yet they shape so much of our lives. Forget the bat-like creatures from horror movies; the fear of failure, rejection, and feeling like you're not enough are way scarier and far more avoided. But you're here, and that’s already a bold step. This episode will shed light on these dreaded feelings, helping you realize that you're not alone and that the experience isn't as terrible as it seems when we look at it together. We're diving deep into how personalizing these feelings makes them so much worse and how to shift your perspective to make them more manageable. These emotions—failure, rejection, and not-enoughness—are what hold so many of us back from living the life we truly want. The good news? They don’t have to. Let's dig into these feelings, challenge them, and see what’s really going on beneath the surface. Thanks for joining me on this brave journey! Visit DrAziz.com to learn more and register for my upcoming virtual event, End Social Anxiety Now.   ------------------------------------------------   You’re brave. You clicked on this episode, even though the title probably made you wince: Failure, Rejection, and Not Enoughness. These aren’t just abstract concepts; they’re feelings we all try to avoid. But if you’re listening today, that means you’re ready to face them, and that takes courage.Halloween might be around the corner, but forget about spooky movies with bat-like creatures jumping out to scare you. The real horror? Facing failure, rejection, and that sinking feeling of not being enough. People will line up to watch a horror movie, but when it comes to willingly diving into their fears of failure or rejection, that’s a different story.So, let’s dive into these “Gruesome Three.” By the end of this post, you’ll not only understand why they have such a hold over you, but also how to soften their grip and start living more freely. When Was the Last Time You Felt One of These? For many, it’s probably quite recent. Maybe it’s happening right now as you’re reading this. These feelings don’t need dramatic events to show up. You can feel like a failure just by not checking off everything on your to-do list. Rejection can come from someone taking too long to text you back. And not enoughness? That can hit just from looking in the mirror.For some, these feelings come and go, but for others, they can be a constant, suffocating presence. I know, because I lived there. When I had severe social anxiety, it was like living in a soup of failure, rejection, and not enoughness. And the worst part? The more I avoided those feelings, the more power they gained. The Insanity of Avoidance Most people’s unspoken life plan is to avoid failure, rejection, and the feeling of not being enough. Seems logical, right? But here’s the catch: these feelings find a way to creep back in. Even if you don’t get rejected by someone because you avoid social situations, that feeling of not being enough might sneak in when you see someone else confidently talking to others.So we think, “Well, if I avoid these feelings, I’ll be fine.” But avoidance isn’t freedom. It’s a life lived in fear. The Insane Setup We Create We’ve set ourselves up with impossible expectations: Every action I take should go exactly as I want. Every person I interact with should respond the way I want them to. If not, I’m a failure and I need to feel awful about myself.It’s an insane setup. We’re demanding perfection from ourselves and others, and when that doesn’t happen, we slide down into a pit of shame and self-criticism. But here’s the key: it doesn’t have to be that way. A New Way Forward Instead of avoiding these feelings or allowing them to tear us down, what if we approached them differently? What if we didn’t personalize every failure, rejection, or moment of not enoughness? What if we saw them as part of the human experience, something that doesn’t define our worth?Here’s a shift you can start making today: the action is the win. The fact that you’re putting yourself out there, trying something, speaking up—that’s the victory. Whether or not it turns out the way you want doesn’t define your success.Zoom out. Look at the bigger picture of your life. Failure, rejection, and not enoughness are momentary blips in a much larger process of growth and learning. Your Action Step: Who’s Making You Feel Not Enough? Here’s the big question for today: Who’s making you feel not enough?We tend to think these feelings just happen to us, like rain falling from the sky. But that’s not true. These feelings come from patterns of thinking that we’ve been practicing, often without even realizing it. You have the power to change those patterns.So the next time you feel that sting of not being enough, ask yourself: Who’s doing this? How am I creating this feeling?This simple awareness can start to unravel the grip these feelings have over you. Reclaim Your Power Failure, rejection, and not enoughness don’t have to be terrifying, all-consuming monsters. By understanding them, seeing their roots, and changing your perspective, you can reclaim your power and live more freely.Until we speak again, remember: you are enough, just as you are. And you have the courage to create the life you want.If you want to dive deeper into breaking free from these patterns, join me for my upcoming virtual event. We’re going to deconstruct rejection and give you tools to handle it in a whole new way. Head over to draziz.com to register. Let’s replace that acid pit with a trampoline that bounces you right back into life!

Welcome to today's episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy! Are you ready to discover the one obstacle standing between you and extraordinary confidence? It might feel like there's a mountain of things in your way, but today, we're breaking it down to just one. Once you understand this obstacle, you'll see how to overcome it and create the confidence you've always wanted. In this episode, Dr. Aziz explores the root of what's truly holding you back—your own perception of what's possible for you. He'll help you challenge the beliefs and feelings that make confidence seem out of reach, and guide you towards taking the actions that will transform your life. Plus, learn more about the upcoming virtual event, End Social Anxiety Now, where you can immerse yourself in powerful strategies to accelerate your confidence journey. If you're ready to break free from discouragement and build the bold, confident life you deserve, this episode is for you. Let’s dive in and uncover what’s really possible for you! Visit DrAziz.com to learn more and register for the virtual event.   -----------------------------------------------------   I’m excited to share something that might surprise you: there’s only one obstacle standing in the way of you building an extraordinary level of confidence. That’s right, just one.  While it might seem like there are countless reasons preventing you from feeling confident, the truth is, they all boil down to this one key thing. Stick with me, and by the end of this post, you’ll feel energized and empowered, ready to create the confidence you’ve always wanted. The Root of Your Confidence Struggles "Do you feel full, freely confident in every aspect of your life?" I’m talking about work, relationships, social situations, and dating. If your answer is anything less than "hell yes," it’s time to ask why. Often, when we ask ourselves this question, we don’t get a clear answer in words. Instead, it’s more of a feeling—a heavy, discouraged, or hopeless feeling. In psychology, this is known as learned helplessness. It’s the belief that no matter what you do, nothing will change, so you might as well give up. This hopelessness doesn’t have to be extreme to hold you back. Even a small amount can zap your energy, prevent you from taking action, and make every step toward confidence feel like an uphill battle. The Real Obstacle: Your Perception of What's Possible The only thing truly blocking your confidence is your perception of what’s possible for you. If you believe that building confidence is impossible, or that it will take too long, you’ll inevitably undermine your efforts. Every setback will feel like proof that you’re incapable, and every rejection will reinforce the idea that you’re just not good enough. But here’s the truth: the issue isn’t your appearance, your social skills, your upbringing, or your personality. The real problem is your belief that those things define what’s possible for you. As long as you hold onto that limiting belief, you’ll be stuck in a cycle of inaction and discouragement. Shifting Your Perspective to Unlock Your Confidence To break free from learned helplessness, you must change your perception. Start by asking yourself: Do I believe that it’s possible for me to create an extraordinary level of confidence? Not just in theory, but for you. This isn’t about whether others can do it—can you?If your honest answer is no, it’s time to challenge that belief. There’s someone out there with your exact challenges who has achieved what you desire. Someone with your height, your upbringing, your experience level, or whatever other limitation you think is holding you back. So why not you? The secret to building confidence is simple: take action, even if it’s uncomfortable. Confidence isn’t something that appears out of thin air—it’s built through doing. Lean into those small, uncomfortable actions. Whether it’s saying hi to a stranger, sharing your thoughts in a meeting, or putting yourself out there in any way, every step you take builds the muscle of confidence. Reclaim Your Power Today "Do you really want to change your perception of yourself?" This is a crucial question because holding onto your limiting beliefs comes with hidden benefits. It might allow you to avoid rejection, escape discomfort, or protect yourself from potential failure. But in reality, those are just excuses that keep you stuck. You have the power to choose a different perspective. Reclaim your belief in yourself and be willing to take the necessary actions, even if they’re challenging. Confidence is possible for you, and you can create it—one step at a time. Take Action Now Think about an area in your life where you feel discouraged or hopeless. Bring your attention to that feeling, and start questioning it. Do I want something different here? What benefits am I getting from keeping things as they are? Once you identify these patterns, you can begin to challenge them. Remember, you’re not alone on this journey. Until we speak again, may you have the courage to be who you are, and to know, on a deep level, that you’re truly awesome.

In today's episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy, we dive deep into the origins of social anxiety and why understanding its roots is crucial for breaking free. Have you ever wondered when and why your social fears started? Whether it began in middle school or as a teenager, this episode unpacks how key moments from the past shape our present behaviors and anxieties. Dr. Aziz also shares personal insights on his journey with social anxiety and offers guidance on how to shift those limiting beliefs that may be holding you back. Plus, you're invited to a special free masterclass, Three Golden Keys to Solve Social Anxiety, where you can discover practical steps to overcome these fears and start creating a radically different 2025. If you're ready to stop letting social anxiety define you, this episode is for you! Don't forget to visit DrAziz.com to sign up for the masterclass and continue your journey to confidence.------------------------------------------------------------------ Yes, it's absolutely possible to build your confidence quickly if you approach it the right way. But most people trying to boost their confidence on their own often make a few common mistakes that end up holding them back. As a result, they conclude: “I guess confidence just isn’t for me” or “I’m hopeless.” This leads to them shelving their dreams of being confident and settling for a life of discomfort and self-doubt. As someone who spent 15 years struggling with low confidence, I’m here to show you the way out. Let’s dive into the three biggest mistakes you might be making—and how to fix them. 1. Avoiding Discomfort One of the most common mistakes is avoiding discomfort. Many people think that building confidence is just about positive thinking or motivational talk. While that can help, there’s only one surefire way to grow your confidence—facing discomfort head-on. Confidence grows through action, particularly the kind of action that feels uncomfortable. It’s like building physical fitness: just as lifting heavier weights challenges your muscles to grow stronger, doing things that make you nervous will expand your comfort zone and your confidence. “Avoiding discomfort shrinks your confidence, while taking action—no matter how small—builds it.” If you avoid taking risks, like speaking up in a meeting or introducing yourself to someone new, your confidence will stagnate. But by embracing gradual exposure to these challenges, you can grow stronger bit by bit. 2. Relying on Harsh Self-Criticism The second major mistake people make is trying to motivate themselves through harsh self-talk. You may be familiar with the inner critic, the voice that tells you things like “That wasn’t good enough” or “You’re going to fail.” Many people mistakenly believe that berating themselves will somehow push them to be better. But the truth is, you can’t beat yourself into confidence. Harsh criticism leads to avoidance and demotivation. Instead, you need to motivate yourself through self-compassion and celebration of small wins. Even if a conversation or task doesn’t go perfectly, it’s essential to acknowledge the effort you put in and the progress you’ve made. “You can’t beat yourself into confidence. Celebrate your wins, even the small ones.” 3. Lack of Consistency The final mistake is expecting instant results and then giving up when things don’t change overnight. Confidence isn’t a one-time thing—it’s a skill you need to practice consistently. Just like you wouldn’t expect to get fit after one or two workouts, you can’t expect lasting confidence after a few attempts. Aim to lean into discomfort at least three times a week. Whether it’s starting a conversation, sharing your ideas, or speaking up at work, taking regular action over time will make all the difference. “Consistency is key. You don’t need extreme efforts—just a little progress, again and again.” A Path Forward: Embrace Gradual, Sustainable Growth The key to lasting confidence is to be patient with yourself and stick with it over time. Make gradual exposure part of your routine, motivate yourself with self-compassion, and remain consistent in taking small, courageous steps toward growth. If you want to dive deeper into this process and have a proven roadmap, check out Confidence University. It provides a step-by-step guide, action plans, and support to help you build the confidence you deserve. Remember: you are not alone on this journey. Until we speak again, may you have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you are truly awesome.