Gay Men Going Deeper

Gay Men's Brotherhood
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Sep 4, 2025 • 40min

Grieving Your Past

Grief isn’t just about death—it’s also about the quiet losses we carry as we grow and evolve. In this episode, we’re kicking off a 4-part series on grief by exploring what it means to grieve your past. Whether it’s a version of yourself that felt more confident, more desirable, or more socially “relevant,” we often feel a deep emotional pull toward who we used to be. From aging and identity shifts to the grief of letting go of our dreams, we’re diving into the invisible grief that comes with change. We discuss: What grieving your past looks like How grief can show up as you grow and evolve  Letting go of your youth, body, or social capital as a gay man The bittersweet nostalgia of past chapters—even ones you chose to leave behind How to know when it’s time to move on, and how to do it with self-compassion This conversation is about honoring who you were while embracing who you’re becoming. Related Episode: Grappling with Grief: Addison Brasil Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
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Aug 28, 2025 • 57min

How to Put Yourself Out There

Most of us want to be seen, heard, and understood, but the fear of judgment can stop us from doing so. Whether it’s being more social, speaking your feelings, or sharing creative work, putting yourself out there can feel risky, especially when we’ve been conditioned to play it safe due to past hurt or rejection.  In this episode, we’re sharing: 👉 Our personal journeys from shy and self-conscious to being more visible 👉 The fears that held us back, and sometimes still do 👉 How we want to be perceived vs. showing up authentically  👉 What helps us keep showing up, even when it’s uncomfortable If you’ve ever held back because you’re scared of what people might think, this episode is for you. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
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Aug 21, 2025 • 35min

The Problem With Self-Love

We all know self-love is important, but what happens when it goes too far in the wrong direction? In this episode, Michael DiIorio is joined by therapist Michael Pezzullo for an honest conversation about the shadow side of self-love. Together, they explore: The difference between self-comforting and self-coddling How emotional sensitivity can become emotional fragility Why self-bulldozing is just as harmful as avoidance The four zones of the Self-Love Spectrum How trauma impacts the way we “love” ourselves How to tell if you're truly healing…or just hiding. You’ll learn about the Self-Love Spectrum, the signs of self-coddling and self-bulldozing, and how to practice a more empowering, growth-oriented version of self-love- without abandoning your need for care and compassion. Join us for an episode that will help you get honest about how you love yourself, and what real self-love actually looks like. Today's Guest: Michael Pezzullo Website Instagram Today's Host: Michael DiIorio Website Instagram Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
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Aug 14, 2025 • 49min

Lone Wolf Energy

Some of us didn’t choose to become lone wolves—we were shaped into them. Many gay men have learned to rely only on themselves, and while that self-sufficiency can feel empowering, it often comes at the cost of connection and intimacy. In this personal and vulnerable episode, Michael and Matt open up about their own lone wolf energy—where it comes from, how it’s served them, and the moments when it became more isolating than empowering. Together, we’re unpacking: The origin stories of our lone wolf instincts The protective thoughts that sound strong but hide deeper wounds What makes us want to cut people off—and what’s really underneath that urge How this energy shows up in dating and relationships And how to honour your need for space without shutting people out Whether you identify as a lone wolf or love someone who does, this episode will help you navigate the delicate balance between fierce independence and meaningful connection. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
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10 snips
Aug 7, 2025 • 58min

Why Do I Keep Attracting Unavailable Men?

Lonay Halloum, a queer relationship coach and rapid transformational therapy practitioner, joins Matt to delve into the compelling reasons behind attracting unavailable partners. They candidly share personal experiences and discuss the role of attachment styles in relationship patterns. The conversation highlights the impact of childhood experiences on emotional availability and self-worth. Lonay offers insights into healing self-abandonment wounds and emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and kindness in breaking the cycle to find fulfilling relationships.
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13 snips
Jul 31, 2025 • 1h

Rejection Sensitivity

Dive into the heart of rejection sensitivity, exploring its roots from childhood experiences. Discover how societal norms and internalized shame shape feelings of inadequacy. Personal stories highlight the impact of dating culture and the struggle for self-acceptance. Learn practical ways to build resilience and embrace vulnerability. The conversation emphasizes the importance of community support in overcoming emotional challenges and finding authenticity. If you've ever felt overwhelmed by rejection, this discussion offers insight and hope.
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Jul 24, 2025 • 39min

Overcoming Uncertainty: A Special Solo Episode with Reno

How would you, your life, and your experience be if you were free from uncertainty, instability, and insecurity? While it can’t be promised you won’t have to experience these again, in this special solo episode, Reno shares personal experiences, perspectives, anecdotes, and practices to help you relate to them in ways that do create more freedom, creativity, resourcefulness, resilience, discernment, enthusiasm and lightness in the face of them. He also demonstrates some ways he has personally navigated uncertainty, instability, and insecurity throughout his life. Today's Host: Reno Johnston Instagram Facebook Schedule a Zoom Call Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
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Jul 17, 2025 • 54min

Claiming Your Power

We may be adults, but a lot of us are still living in emotional childhood—blaming others for how we feel and how we act. When you give other people control over your emotions, you give away your power. In this episode, we're breaking down what it means to take responsibility for your emotions and why it is fundamental if you want true freedom, stronger relationships, and genuine self-confidence. We’ll share personal stories of when we were stuck in emotional immaturity and how we learned to take responsibility for our emotions  We’re covering: The difference between emotional immaturity and emotional maturity Why blaming others keeps you miserable and powerless What it really means to own your emotions without beating yourself up How this skill improves your relationships, confidence, and inner peace How we learned the skill of emotional responsibility  Where we still struggle and how we handle it  This isn’t about being perfect. It's about waking up, stepping up, and taking your power back. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
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Jul 10, 2025 • 1h 6min

How to Soften the Inner Critic

In this episode, Matt speaks with author and love advocate, Scott Stabile. Together, they break down the psycho-spiritual aspects of the inner critic and how to best work with it from a place of love. If you are someone who is hard on yourself and has a tough time finding self-love and self-compassion, this episode will help you develop greater awareness of your inner critic, where self-judgment originates, and how you can start practicing more acceptance of yourself and others through presence, love, and compassion.  The concepts and questions we explore in this episode are: How do you define love and self-love/compassion? Do you believe it's possible to transcend self-judgment? What does self-compassion look like? How does prioritizing self-love/compassion serve the world outside of yourself? Are there specific tools or techniques you can recommend to foster deeper self-compassion and self-love? How do you feel, if at all, that lack of self-compassion is contributing to the insanity and division we're seeing in our world? Today's Guest: Scott Stabile Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Today's Host: Matt Landsiedel Facebook Instagram TikTok Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.
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Jul 3, 2025 • 1h 1min

Feeling Your Emotions

What happens when we avoid feeling our emotions? In this episode, we explore the importance of emotional awareness: tuning in instead of checking out. We share what happens when we suppress our feelings, and how to navigate the tough ones with compassion and care. We also explore: The link between emotional avoidance and things like addiction, depression, and burnout What blocks us from feeling our emotions Practical ways to process emotions that feel overwhelming or uncomfortable The power of self-compassion in emotional healing Why learning to feel your emotions leads to more empathy, connection, and confidence Whether you’re someone who bottles it all up or someone who feels everything all at once, this conversation will give you insight and tools to better understand yourself and others. Today's Hosts: Michael DiIorio Matt Landsiedel Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report.

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