Therapy Works

In this episode of "Agony Aunties," we’re responding to a listener's question about maintaining a relationship with their son's ex-girlfriend. While it’s understandable to want to maintain a connection with someone that you personally don’t have any issues with, and while we don’t know all of the ins and outs of the situation, what arises in us is the importance to be aware of the complexity of such dynamics post-breakup, to consider the son's feelings, and to be aware of the the potential for confusion on the ex's part.We’ll be expanding on these ideas in the episode, so give it a listen, and if you have any questions of your own, please send them in to jsamuelpod@gmail.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week’s episode, I’ll be delving into Petrina Barber's harrowing journey with cancer, diagnosed shortly after the birth of her son. Petrina shares the complexities of her battle, not just with the disease itself but also with the incurable condition that arose from her treatment, drastically impacting her and her family’s life. While Petrina lost a sense of autonomy over her body and acknowledges the profound losses it brought, she has been able to show such tremendous strength, and physically accomplish what no doctor thought possible. In doing so - she is redefining what is possible for people with stomas.Key Points Discussed:•⁠ ⁠The Initial Shock: Petrina's “perfect” life was upended with a cancer diagnosis at a young age, changing everything she knew and planned for her abd her family's future. •⁠ ⁠Treatment and its Aftermath: The severe side effects of cancer treatment led to the development of Pelvic Radiation Disease (PRD), significantly altering Petrina's life quality and leading to numerous medical emergencies.•⁠ ⁠Advocacy and Self-Care: Learning to advocate for herself and focusing on the quality of life became Petrina's priority, shifting from a survival mindset to one of living fully despite the circumstances. What Petrina has been able to achieve in the face of all of her health challenges, is incredibly impressive.•⁠ ⁠Strength and Resilience: Despite numerous challenges, Petrina's story is a testament to human resilience, the power of family support, and the importance of finding joy and purpose even in the face of life-altering adversity.Petrina's narrative is a touching reminder of the unpredictable nature of life, the strength found in vulnerability, and the power of hope and relentless love in navigating the most challenging moments. This episode illuminates the deep impact of health crises on personal identity, family dynamics, and the journey toward finding new meaning and strength amidst loss.This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s episode of the Therapy Works podcast, we released a very important conversation with Charles Spencer, where he opens up about his experience of childhood sexual abuse in boarding school. In this bonus episode, the three of us talk about our takeaways from that conversation, and what really resonated in us when we heard Charles’ story.Key Points Discussed: Complexity of Disclosure: They explore the difficulties victims face in disclosing abuse, especially sexual abuse, due to societal disbelief and the inherent shame tied to these experiences. Impact of Abuse on Identity and Relationships: The dialogue delves into the effects of abuse on self-perception, the struggle with shame, and the obstacles to forming intimate and trustworthy relationships. Navigating the Healing Process: The importance of therapy, acknowledging one’s experiences, and finding a narrative to differentiate the past from the present are emphasised as crucial steps towards recovery. The Role of Acknowledgment in Healing: The power of acknowledging harm done, either through direct conversation or letters, as a pivotal step for both victims and perpetrators towards addressing intergenerational trauma. For more information, please visit the National Child Traumatic Stress Network - https://www.nctsn.org Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, I’m speaking with Charles Spencer, who shares his traumatic experiences at a boarding school where he faced physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. Charles discusses the profound impact these childhood experiences have had on his life, the complex process of healing, and the importance of speaking out to help others.Key Points Discussed: Enduring Abuse: Charles recounts the harrowing abuse he endured during his time at a particularly abusive boarding school, including sexual abuse, and the lasting impact on his mental health. The Healing Journey: The conversation delves into Charles's extensive journey through therapy, including EMDR, and the role of writing his book as a form of therapy. Impact of Trauma: Charles reflects on how the trauma influenced his views on trust, relationships, and self-worth, emphasising the importance of working through past pain for personal growth. Advocacy for Change: Highlighting the importance of advocating for the protection of children and raising awareness about the long-term effects of abuse, Charles discusses his hope that his story will inspire others to seek help and speak out. This episode offers hope and solidarity to others who have experienced similar traumas. Charles Spencer's openness provides valuable insights into the complexities of healing from childhood abuse and underscores the power of vulnerability and truth in overcoming the shadows of the past.Buy Charles's book: https://amzn.eu/d/8KndO4sFollow Charles on X: @cspencer1508 Follow Charles on Instagram: @charles.earl.spencerWatch the full podcast episode on Julia's Youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCX3RmDaV8ZzsLuQzsi-4hAA A big thank you to our wonderful sponsor Window Fleur. Please head to their website and use the code THERAPYWORKS15 for 15% off your first order: https://windowfleur.com/Produced by Rutherford Productions Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s episode of Agony Aunties, we’re taking a bit of a different direction. While I do much prefer to answer your questions, and to connect with what’s alive in you, this week I’m going to share something that has happened to me. Namely, I am currently going through a series of health challenges. I broke my shoulder in a fall, and needed a couple of surgeries for it. On top of that, I have a rare condition called Ramsay Hunt Syndrome, the symptoms of which have flared up and paralysed half of my face, and this is affecting the way I look and speak. I thought it might be odd if I just appeared on video without explaining what happened, as I do look and sound different than before.However, while I do appreciate the kindness and support I have received from so many of you already, I don’t want the focus of my content to be on me and this situation I’m in. I’m very motivated by the work that I’m doing, by these talks that I’m having, and these stories that I’m sharing. And I also find great meaning in sharing this work with you, and in the community that we’re all developing. I am going to continue doing what I find most meaningful. Thank you. Next week we’ll get back to answering your questions again, so do please continue to send them in. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Professor Tom Shakespeare discusses the challenges of balancing achievement with life's finite nature. The conversation focuses on societal prejudices towards disability and the need for a shift in perception. Embracing human limitations and the power of rest and laughter are emphasized. The podcast delves into historical treatments of disabilities and advocates for acceptance and belonging in all communities.

In this episode of Agony Aunties, Julia, Emily and Sophie share insightful perspectives on the topic of "only children." Julia critiques the term itself, emphasising that it carries a derivative implication, suggesting that an only child is somehow insufficient. Emily adds that regardless of family configuration, there are both pros and cons, and having just one child can offer unique benefits, allowing the child to receive undivided attention and care. The conversation touches on the complexities of family structures and challenges the notion that only children face disadvantages.The discussion then shifts to supporting a teenager on the edge of friendship groups. Emily points out the natural fluctuations in teenage friendships and acknowledges the pain parents feel when they can't easily intervene. Sophie contributes from her own experience, urging parents to reflect on their own past and potential projections onto their children. The importance of understanding the difference between the parent's and the child's experiences is highlighted, emphasising open communication and shared vulnerability in navigating teenage friendships. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this emotionally charged episode, Henrietta opens up about her journey through permanent childlessness and shares the complexities of her grief. Henrietta describes how there isn't a singular reason for her childlessness – not meeting the right partner and the element of luck being 50% out of her control. She recalls making a promise to herself, keeping the door half-shut, and the heartbreak that then followed.Key Points Discussed:Confronting Sadness:Exploring the depths of her grief, Henrietta opens up about the sadness that accompanies the longing for children never conceived. The challenges of feeling alienated and misunderstood during the second year of her journey come to the forefront.Disenfranchised Grief:Henrietta sheds light on the disenfranchised grief experienced by childless individuals, where the loss remains invisible and delegitimized. She addresses the staggering statistic that one in five people faces this unacknowledged sorrow.Creating a Supportive Tribe:Discovering solace in a newfound community, Henrietta emphasises the significance of creating spaces for childless women to openly discuss their pain. She underscores the power of validation and the healing that can occur when individuals facing similar struggles come together.Existential Anguish:Henrietta bares her soul, sharing moments of anger and betrayal intertwined with the existential loneliness that accompanies childlessness. She articulates the ongoing struggle of holding onto the idea of having her own child.This episode serves as a powerful testament to the often silent grief of permanent childlessness. It provides a compassionate space for validation and understanding. Henrietta's story unfolds as a narrative of resilience and strength in the face of unseen struggles. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, a listener seeks advice on parenting adult children. The Agony Aunties encourage active listening, allowing for diverse perspectives without necessarily agreeing. They suggest using feedback formats, like expressing what one hears, sees, feels, and relates, to avoid judgement. The conversation explores the importance of compromise, acknowledging emotional subtext in disagreements, and understanding the generational shift in parenting dynamics.They emphasise the evolving nature of the parent-adult child relationship, acknowledging the dance between letting go and remaining close. They reflect on the challenge of finding a balance between abandonment and enmeshment, offering insights into the worry that comes with children growing into adulthood. The episode concludes with wisdom on processing loss, accepting the evolving roles, and trusting adult children to navigate their lives while providing a supportive presence. If you're navigating the complexities of parenting adult children, this episode offers thoughtful guidance and relatable perspectives. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today's deeply moving conversation, I am honoured to be joined by the incredible Annabel Croft. Annabel graciously shares her poignant journey through the rapid and tragic loss of her husband to cancer. We delve into the realms of loss, love, and the indomitable spirit of hope that persists in the face of grief.In this episode, we discuss: Sudden Diagnosis and Profound Journey: Annabel recounts the shocking moment they learned of her husband's terminal diagnosis, marking the beginning of a profound journey through grief and acceptance. She discusses the brutal reality of receiving such news, the swift progression of her husband's illness, and the emotional turmoil that ensued for her and her family.Brutal Delivery of News: We explore the brutal way in which healthcare practitioners handled their situation, making what's already devastating worse. We reflect on the lasting impact it has on individuals and families facing terminal illnesses.Strength in Vulnerability: Annabel's courage to be vulnerably open, allowing her emotions to be seen and felt, offers a beacon of understanding for anyone navigating the turbulent waters of loss.Therapeutic Power of Dance and Hope: The conversation highlights the importance of hope, the therapeutic power of dance in Annabel's life, and the significance of finding joy and meaning despite the presence of grief.Annabel's Reflections: Reflecting on her experience, Annabel's story serves as a testament to the strength found in vulnerability and the resilience of the human spirit. Though uniquely hers, it echoes universal truths of love's depth, the pain of loss, and the enduring quest for solace and understanding.As we share in Annabel's journey, let us remember the capacity of the human heart to heal, to find light amidst darkness, and to continue loving in the memory of those we've lost. Annabel expresses her desire to support the work of a brilliant scientist, Isabella Cooper. For those interested, you can read more about Isabelle's work here: https://www.foreveryounggroup.com/about-us Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices