The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}

The best way to love your child’s watchdog and possum parts is by loving your own.Today, as I move toward wrapping up this writing-and-publishing-a-book chapter in my life, let’s talk a little more about the neuroscience of owls, watchdogs, and possums, why the science matters, and how my work has surprisingly become more about helping the grown-ups love their own owl, watchdog, and possum brains.Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors uses metaphor, story, and science to strengthen your owl brain (ventral vagal complex) and increase your window of stress tolerance. It is my hope that in reading this book, you will feel held by my owl brain.Thankfully, I have owl wings wrapped around my watchdog and possum brain, too. You can read about those folks in my acknowledgments. I have so many owls who have knit themselves into my neurobiology and strengthened my own owl self so that I can offer compassionate gratitude and nonjudgmental presence to you and your child.In this episode you’ll learn:The science of the owl brain through the lens of Interpersonal NeurobiologyThe science of the owl brain through the lens of polyvagal theoryThe best way to strengthen YOUR owl brainHow strengthening your owl brain is the best way to strengthen your child’sResources mentioned in this podcast:Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors released September 21. CLICK HERE to choose from a variety of pre-order bonuses, including a signed copy or 20% off.Teaching kids about their owl, watchdog, and possum brain is one key piece of growing their owl brain and calming their watchdog and possum brain!Register for this once-a-year webinar on September 4, 2025 at RobynGobbel.com/TeachKidsTheBrainYou'll get access to the recording and OODLES of resources.Club Members- you do NOT have to register!!!*** Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources Applications for the 2026 cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program are now open! You MUST be on the waiting list to apply! Get on the waiting list at RobynGobbel.com/immersion :::Grab a copy of my book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubApply for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Ever wondered why knowing the right parenting strategies doesn't always lead to action? This discussion delves into the neuroscience behind behavior, highlighting how much of our actions stem from unconscious processes. It explores the impact of a sensitized stress response on parenting, revealing why regulated and connected parents can better support their children. The conversation also emphasizes the importance of self-regulation and compassion, making it clear that struggling with these challenges doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent.

Instead of responding or reacting to challenging behaviors, think about it as calming the watchdog or the possum brain. Once you understand how your child’s behaviors correspond to their level of dysregulation and lack of felt safety, you’ll be able to use strategies (for regulation, connection, and felt safety) that really work.In this episode we’ll discuss:How challenging behaviors are the result of the stress response systemWhy some kids have sensitized stress responses that lead to baffling behaviorsStrategies to calm the watchdog and possum brainResources mentioned in this podcast:Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors released September 21. CLICK HERE to choose from a variety of pre-order bonuses, including a signed copy or 20% off.Free Resources! -  robyngobbel.com/freeresourcesRead the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/calmwatchdogpossumTeaching kids about their owl, watchdog, and possum brain is one key piece of growing their owl brain and calming their watchdog and possum brain!Register for this once-a-year webinar on September 4, 2025 at RobynGobbel.com/TeachKidsTheBrainYou'll get access to the recording and OODLES of resources.Club Members- you do NOT have to register!!!*** Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources Applications for the 2026 cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program are now open! You MUST be on the waiting list to apply! Get on the waiting list at RobynGobbel.com/immersion :::Grab a copy of my book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubApply for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Wondering how to tackle your child's baffling behaviors effectively? Join me as I share insights from my comprehensive framework, as well as practical tools and an understanding of your own nervous system. We'll break down how three elements interweave to address complex behaviors and also discuss the subtitle behind my book, "Brain-body-sensory Strategies That Really Work."In this episode you’ll learn:Why the approach in Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors is an approach that ‘really works’Why Growing the Owl Brain is a more important place to focus than Responding to Watchdog and Possum Brain behaviorThe three things to address to Grow the Owl BrainResources mentioned in this podcast:Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors released September 21. CLICK HERE to choose from a variety of pre-order bonuses, including a signed copy or 20% off.Scaffolding Is A Form Of Co-regulation {EP 82}The Connected Therapist by Marti SmithRead the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/growtheowlbrainTeaching kids about their owl, watchdog, and possum brain is one key piece of growing their owl brain and calming their watchdog and possum brain!Register for this once-a-year webinar on September 4, 2025 at RobynGobbel.com/TeachKidsTheBrainYou'll get access to the recording and OODLES of resources.Club Members- you do NOT have to register!!!*** Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::Grab a copy of my book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubApply for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Understanding what behavior really is helps us:Stop playing behavior whack-a-moleUse strategies and tools that really workStay more regulated so we can use our thinking brain to make good choices about what to do nextWe’re going back to basics with today’s podcast episode with a short exploration of the neuroscience of behavior- especially the most baffling behavior.Resources mentioned in this podcast:Book pre-order/order: robyngobbel.com/bookRead the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/whatbehaviorreallyisTeaching kids about their owl, watchdog, and possum brain is one key piece of growing their owl brain and calming their watchdog and possum brain!Register for this once-a-year webinar on September 4, 2025 at RobynGobbel.com/TeachKidsTheBrainYou'll get access to the recording and OODLES of resources.Club Members- you do NOT have to register!!!*** Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources Applications for the 2026 cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program are now open! You MUST be on the waiting list to apply! Get on the waiting list at RobynGobbel.com/immersion :::Grab a copy of my book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubApply for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Are you struggling to find common ground with your partner when it comes to parenting? This episode will shed light on this common dilemma as we discuss understanding behavior, creating a support plan, and cultivating authenticity and honesty within the family. We'll explore the reasons behind resistance to paradigm shifts and dive into the intricacies of the owl, watchdog, and possum metaphor. You'll learn how curiosity and connection can bridge differences with your parenting partner, even when they seem insurmountable.In this episode you’ll learn:The importance of addressing underlying issues and supporting your partner with parenting strugglesHow having different parenting styles or philosophies doesn’t mean you can’t be a successful partnershipAbout tools needed to navigate these challenges and strengthen the relationship with your parenting partnerResources mentioned in this podcast:Has Trauma Informed Become A Behavior Modification Technique? {Ep 54}What if Trauma Informed…Isn’t? {Ep 134}But- What About A Consequence?!?! {Ep 56}When Your Nervous System Is Fried {Ep 139}Self-Compassion Will Change Your Brain {Ep 8}Q&A! What Do I Do When My Kid Gets StuckTeaching kids about their owl, watchdog, and possum brain is one key piece of growing their owl brain and calming their watchdog and possum brain!Register for this once-a-year webinar on September 4, 2025 at RobynGobbel.com/TeachKidsTheBrainYou'll get access to the recording and OODLES of resources.Club Members- you do NOT have to register!!!*** Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources Applications for the 2026 cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program are now open! You MUST be on the waiting list to apply! Get on the waiting list at RobynGobbel.com/immersion :::Grab a copy of my book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/bookJoin us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClubApply for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) robyngobbel.com/ImmersionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagram Over on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Dayna Abraham, author of 'Calm the Chaos,' shares her journey from sibling to parent of challenging children with vulnerable nervous systems. She discusses her transformative framework for parenting, emphasizing that children’s uniqueness should be celebrated. Dayna highlights the need for emotional connection over rigid academic success and reflects on her decade-long growth in navigating parenting challenges. With practical strategies, she empowers parents to build a supportive community and nurture their child’s emotional well-being.

Navigating the complexities of parenting a child with a sensitive nervous system can be daunting. The discussion sheds light on the fine line between enabling and co-regulation, revealing how misinterpretations can hinder growth. Parents learn to distinguish between genuine needs and their own comfort when lowering demands. With a focus on attunement, the hosts highlight the critical role of reflective practices in enhancing the caregiver-child relationship, especially for those with trauma histories.

Ginger Healy, Program Director for the Attachment and Trauma Network, discusses her mission to help children heal from trauma. As a former child abuse investigator and adoptive parent, she shares her inspiring journey of resilience. Topics include transforming behavior plans to focus on children's nervous systems and the vital role adults play in creating safe spaces. Ginger also offers practical co-regulation strategies for educators and parents, emphasizing the importance of positive relationships in fostering resilience and recovery for children.

Amanda Diekman, author of "Low Demand Parenting" and an advocate for nurturing relationships, shares groundbreaking insights into parenting sensitive children. She discusses the revolutionary concept of low-demand parenting, which shifts traditional power dynamics to foster trust. Listeners will discover effective strategies for handling meltdowns, the importance of understanding individual stress responses, and the balance between connection and control. With personal experiences and research-backed approaches, Amanda offers hope and practical tools for parents.