Night Classy

Fact: family annihilators all have golden retrievers and live in cookie-cutter neighborhoods. But that would never happen in a Disney-created town, right? RIGHT?! Listen to Hayley’s lesson on the creepy happenings in the town of Celebration, Florida and maybe you’ll end up hating Mickey Mouse too. Or if you’d rather keep the magic alive, you can skip right to Kat’s lesson. It’s ~out of this world~ Kat teaches us about the red planet that is red. It’s boiling hot and toxic as fuck. Would you “swipe right” on a lesson about life on Mars?! After this lesson, you too can be a hoe for science... maybe even a “know” for science!  Follow @SilvrIsKee and @BTNTuune on social media to keep up with their journey to raise money and help houseless people around the country. https://linktr.ee/NightClassy Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

Kat’s a true crime bitch this week and covers Gary Ridgeway, The Green River Killer. Much like Gary, we don’t like necrophilia, but unlike him, we don’t do it. Then, oh good, more trauma! Hayley introduces us to a group of people even more outlandish than flat earthers: hollow earthers! Here, we learn that the earth is not filled with “ligwah macquid,” but rather grape flavored thrifty vegetables. Honestly, just call us Rush Limbaugh because we kinda believe it. https://linktr.ee/NightClassy Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

Kat simultaneously teaches the history of beauty pageants and makes the distinction that Greek mythology is NOT history. You don't have to be an undercover cop to participate in beauty pageants but you must use a critical lens when reviewing the misogynistic and racist past of these programs. If traditional pageantry doesn't tickle your fancy, look out for Night Classy's very own witch-themed pageant (disclaimer: must own cat to enter)! Next, Hayley covers the creepy details of The Welles House and gets shamed for never having seen The Amityville Horror. Kat definitely welcomed a ghost into her body so you'll want to settle in and dawn your best ghost-hunting gear (ie: 24-inch sword and brass knuckles?) for this one.  Check out Patreon and social media below:         https://linktr.ee/NightClassy Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

Hayley schools us on sex in Ancient Egypt… Good news: if you were single, you had nothing to lose! (Not even your virginity.) We’ve concluded that God IS a woman and she IS a milky-breasted vampire. Have you used “consex” clues to decipher the topic this week? If not, Kat can help further with her lesson on animal mating rituals. Turns out, there are some problematic practices in the animal kingdom. #YesAllFish. Oh, and don’t forget to check your throat for sea slugs and squid heads!   Head over to Patreon to support Night Classy and gain access to extra content! Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

Kat teaches a lesson on last meals, or “special meals,” of death row inmates. Learn about the history and psychology behind the practice of last meals, and remember to order the “last meal special” next time you’re at Starbucks! Next, we hit the motherlode motherlode motherlode motherlode when Hayley covers the practice of hacking. We promise this lesson is at least 10 times more interesting than a model train racing competition.  https://linktr.ee/NightClassy Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

Holly covers the case of a Florida man on a power trip. The Pasco County sheriff’s office has been surveilling and harassing its residents on the basis of arbitrary scores that “predict” how likely they are to commit a future crime. IT JUST MAKES NO SENSE AT ALL. Next, Claudia teaches a lesson on the case that has been called “the second Dyatlov Pass Incident.” Is it a creepy pasta? Is this Blue Adept round two? No!!! And stop asking!!!  Support the brands who support us!  For 20% off your order of Seventh Hill CBD visit seventhhillcbd.com and enter our promo code nightclassy. https://linktr.ee/NightClassy Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

Hayley delivers a history lesson this week on 15th century mercenary, Gotz Von Berlichingen. Berlichen enjoyed fighting people, fighting cities, fighting countries, fighting Chipotle, ruling with an iron fist, and most of all, having his ass kissed. Next, Kat teaches a lesson on the catalyst of the modern day LGBTQIA+ rights movement and the reason we have pride parades: Stonewall. Happy pride everybody, and thank you to the brave folks at Stonewall who made Pride Month possible! This Pride Month, please consider making a donation to one of the following organizations: www.hrc.org thetrevorproject.org blacktrans.org Support the brands who support us!  For 20% off your order of Seventh Hill CBD visit seventhhillcbd.com and enter our promo code nightclassy. Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

We did it! It’s the episode no one asked for. Kat teaches a lesson on the dogfighting ring of the video game world- Pokemon. Next, Hayley talks about One Direction, the “infamous” 2010s boyband. Now you hipsters can be experts on the two things you avoided because they were too ~mainstream~ Support the brands who support us!  For 20% off your order of Seventh Hill CBD visit seventhhillcbd.com and enter our promo code nightclassy. https://linktr.ee/NightClassy Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

Hayley teaches a lesson on hipsters and proves they all look the same.. And they’re living in SALT LAKE CITY?! It also turns out that modern hipsters were not the first to the game- they owe it all to the hepcats. Then, Kat presents the history of swear words and the research behind why we fucking love swearing. Stop trying to make “ficken” happen. It’s NOT going to happen! Support the brands who support us!  For 20% off your order of Seventh Hill CBD visit seventhhillcbd.com and enter our promo code nightclassy. https://linktr.ee/NightClassy Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021

This week, we prove that #yesallmen. Hayley tells the story of American Apparel and its predator of a CEO Dov Charney. Dov really showed that all good things can and will be ruined by a creepy ass man. This is why we can’t have nice T-shirts. Then, Kat teaches a lesson on Marvin Heemeyer and his “killdozer.” Marvin felt wronged by zoning laws so he decided to take things into his own hands.. And the internet made him a hero for it.  Support the brands who support us!  For 20% off your order of Seventh Hill CBD visit seventhhillcbd.com and enter our promo code nightclassy. https://linktr.ee/NightClassy Produced by Parasaur Studios © 2021