Nope! We're Not Monogamous

Today I’m talking to my dear friend, Wilder, about her experiences of non-monogamy and combining families with an already married couple. We talk about triads and the assumptions people make about them, monogamous deconditioning we have to work through when moving into polyamory, and raising kids and polyamorous families, and just a lot of really in depth, juicy stuff.Wilder is in a closed triad with a married couple, and they live together in Olalla raising a ruckus with chicken, ducks, children and having wonderful adventures.Bullet points of key topics & time stamps: 2:19- Closed Triads4:20-Labels8:24-Transitioning to Polyamory15:03- Being Authentic and Self-Love18:59- Monogamy Programming and Triads33:24- Jealousy44:49- Raising Kids52:44- The Possibilities of the Future54:41- Control1:00:08- Authentic LivingCalls to action: Stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia by getting on the list hereFind Us Online           - Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com/           - Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine           - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/Credits- Host: Ellecia Paine. https://www.elleciapaine.com/- Executive Producer: Ellecia Paine. https://www.elleciapaine.com/- Producer: Danny Walters. - Editor: Danny WaltersAbout UsEllecia Paine is a non-monogamy relationship coach who helps people navigate ENM (enthusiastic non-monogamy), polyamory, open relating, swinging, kink, and life in general.Listen in to the candid conversations that give you a peek into the inner lives of other non-monogamous folks. Hear how they've overcome challenges like jealousy, insecurity, and social scrutiny. And celebrate with them as they share all the reasons it's worth it to have relationships that don't fit in the box.Send us a texthttps://elleciapaine.com/callSupport the show📰 Subscribe to Not A Monogamous Newsletter to stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia. https://elleciapaine.podia.com/newsletter ❤️ Enjoying the show? The best way to thank us is by following and leaving a review or a note. And if you want more, join our Patreon! http://www.patreon.com/notmonogamous 👀 Find Us Online🌍 Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/Music: Composer/Author (CA): Oscar LindsteinSTIM IPI: 572 393 237

In this episode, I talk with Mags Baker, a polyamorous, non-binary, sexy divorcée living their best life in San Francisco. They work one-on-one with people to help them find freedom, gain clarity and manifest their juiciest desires. Currently, mags works with folks healing from divorce through healing  journeys, intensives, and retreats. They are often found leading sex-positive dance parties on zoom, teaching masterclasses, and hosting live guided meditations. Together, we discuss divorce, transitioning relationships, boundaries, and some of the juicy tools to make our lives better!Join their facebook group HOT divorcé shit for all sorts of exclusive content and a community to let you live your best divorced/solo life here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorcelandBinge watch mags’ brilliant content and stay tuned to their stories for hilarious real-life updates: https://www.instagram.com/magsbakertheyshe/Join mags’ email list to be the first to sign up for all mags’ future offerings: https://www.happymillennialmags.com/email-listDivorce camp Bullet points of key topics & time stamps: 1:01- Writing your own love story4:34- Jealousy6:31- Opening up a monogamous relationship8:53- Divorce13:12- Transitioning relationships20:55- Tools26:02- Society and relationships28:42- Boundaries40:12- Working with Mags43:29- Getting it on in a GroupList of resources mentioned in episode: Breathwork with ElleciaEcstatic Dance with MagsDivorce CampGetting it on in a GroupCalls to action: ● Stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia by getting on the list here● Find Us Online           - Website:Send us a texthttps://elleciapaine.com/callSupport the show📰 Subscribe to Not A Monogamous Newsletter to stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia. https://elleciapaine.podia.com/newsletter ❤️ Enjoying the show? The best way to thank us is by following and leaving a review or a note. And if you want more, join our Patreon! http://www.patreon.com/notmonogamous 👀 Find Us Online🌍 Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/Music: Composer/Author (CA): Oscar LindsteinSTIM IPI: 572 393 237

In this episode I talk with Kari Lu Cowell, not only about non-monogamy, but soulmates, monogamous conditioning, whether or not you should start your non-monogamous relationship in the beginning of your relationship or if you should build a monogamous foundation first, and so much more!Kari Lu Cowell is a Dating Coach for Nerds. She helps people feel authentically comfortable and confident with dating so they can find the relationships of their dreams. She works with all relationship desires, specializing in people who seek non-traditional relationships like kink, BDSM, ethical non-monogamy, Sugar Daddy/sugar baby, etc. Having dabbled in all of those things for the past two decades, Kari leads with an open heart and an open mind. With her background in therapy and trauma informed wellness, along with her core value of play, Kari brings a unique mix of mindfulness, psychology, and fun to all of her teachings. Outside of her coaching, Kari loves reading, axe throwing, pole dancing, Doctor Who, connecting with others, and her dog Beau.www.facebook.com/groups/datingfordorkswww.instagram.com/karilucoachinghttps://bookme.name/DatingforDorkshttps://mailchi.mp/ea8220097497/dungeons-and-datingBullet points of key topics & time stamps: 2:30- Labels8:35- Ethical Non-Monogamy13:37- Jealousy20:43- Monogamy as a Foundation28:58- NRE and Balancing Partners Needs34:01- Opening Up Sexually35:57- Social Perceptions37:42- Threesomes41:48- Relationship Dynamics and Communication45:47- Kari’s CoachingList of resources mentioned in episode: ● Polysecure by Jessica Fern https://amzn.to/3ymbhjA● Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller TO-DO● Stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia by getting on the list here● Find Us Online           - Website:Send us a texthttps://elleciapaine.com/callSupport the show📰 Subscribe to Not A Monogamous Newsletter to stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia. https://elleciapaine.podia.com/newsletter ❤️ Enjoying the show? The best way to thank us is by following and leaving a review or a note. And if you want more, join our Patreon! http://www.patreon.com/notmonogamous 👀 Find Us Online🌍 Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/Music: Composer/Author (CA): Oscar LindsteinSTIM IPI: 572 393 237

People always want to know about my non-monogamous relationship, what worked for me, what I've done in my life, or what other people who are non-monogamous have done. Today, my husband Rob and I are going to share a bit about our open relationship and our polyamory experiences. We answer the questions that people have asked us over the course of our relationship about our polyamorous marriage, about our partners, about what happens in our bedroom, and about how our family deals with it all. Key topics & time stamps: 2:42- Why non-monogamy8:50- Early challenges and monogamous conditioning14:04- Communication and attachment15:53- Relationship resiliency16:52- Intrusive relationship questions22:20- Marriage and how it works with a triad26:46- Polyamory28:20- Kids and polyamoryTo Do!● Stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia by getting on the list here● Find Us Online           - Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com/           - Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine           - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/● Share this episode with your friends:  https://www.elleciapaine.com/notmonogamousSubscribe and leave a reviewCredits- Host:  Ellecia Paine. https://www.elleciapaine.com/- Executive Producer:  Ellecia Paine. https://www.elleciapaine.com/- Producer: Danny Walters. - Editor: Danny WaltersAbout UsEllecia Paine is a non-monogamy relationship coach who helps people navigate ENM (enthusiastic non-monogamy), polyamory, open relating, swinging, kink, and life in general.Listen in to the candid conversations that give you a peek into the inner lives of other non-monogamous folks. Hear how they've overcome challenges like jealousy, insecurity, and social scrutiny. And celebrate with them as they share all the reasons it's worth it to have relationships that don't fit in the box.Send us a texthttps://elleciapaine.com/callSupport the show📰 Subscribe to Not A Monogamous Newsletter to stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia. https://elleciapaine.podia.com/newsletter ❤️ Enjoying the show? The best way to thank us is by following and leaving a review or a note. And if you want more, join our Patreon! http://www.patreon.com/notmonogamous 👀 Find Us Online🌍 Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/Music: Composer/Author (CA): Oscar LindsteinSTIM IPI: 572 393 237

Hi, I'm Ellecia Paine, and as a sex loving relationship coach who specializes in enthusiastic non-monogamy and polyamory, I get a lot of people coming to me for advice. And I get just as many people coming to me asking about my personal experiences. What I've noticed is that people want to know what others are actually doing. I think it's a combination of looking for validation that they're not the only one and that other people are doing the same things, and also that the advice that they're receiving and the books that they're reading aren't just of the "do as I say, not as I do variety". A lot of relationship recommendations that are out there run counter to the social narratives that we all carry around relationships, so it can very much feel like, "I don't know... Well that's easy for you to say, but my situation is different". So I'm here to give you, as the listener, a window view into what real life non-monogamous people are doing in their relationships, what they're saying in their relationships, what their experiences are, how they're overcoming challenges, what their challenges are and what makes it all worth it. And also how they think other people in their worlds are perceiving them and their relationships and their life choices. So I'm going to be talking to my friends, new friends, old friends, people who didn't know they were going to become my friends until I asked them to come chat with me. We're going to talk about sex, love, enthusiastic and consensual non-monogamy, parenting and family life, the universe, and everything. Go ahead and subscribe right now because I already know you're gonna love it! And in case you're still wondering. Nope, We're Not Monogamous.Send us a texthttps://elleciapaine.com/callSupport the show📰 Subscribe to Not A Monogamous Newsletter to stay up to date with new episodes and offerings from Ellecia. https://elleciapaine.podia.com/newsletter ❤️ Enjoying the show? The best way to thank us is by following and leaving a review or a note. And if you want more, join our Patreon! http://www.patreon.com/notmonogamous 👀 Find Us Online🌍 Website: https://www.elleciapaine.com📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elleciapaine 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elleciapaine/Music: Composer/Author (CA): Oscar LindsteinSTIM IPI: 572 393 237