Dear Dr. Tracy

In this episode, Dr. Tracy sits down with author and producer Lindsay Jill Roth to talk about her new book, Romances and Practicalities—a love story woven together with 250 thoughtful questions designed to deepen connection and spark meaningful conversations between partners.Together, they explore the space where romance meets real life—how couples can navigate everyday responsibilities without losing the spark, and why asking better questions is the secret to building a lasting relationship. Lindsay shares what inspired the book, how her own experiences shaped it, and the surprising ways practicality can actually fuel intimacy.Whether you're dating, newly married, or decades in, this episode will inspire you to pause, reflect, and get curious with your partner.Learn more about Lindsay Jill Roth: https://lindsayjillroth.com/Grab her book, Romances and Practicalities: https://lindsayjillroth.com/romances-amp-practicalities/RESOURCES:Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz: Take it hereReady to deepen your connection? Download my 100 QuestionsBuild better connection and feel close starting today. Join the 30 Days to Us ChallengeHeal old wounds and build healthy interdependence with my book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” - order here! LINKS:Vionic Shoes: Use code TRACY for 15% off at https://www.vionicshoes.comAir Doctor Pro - air purifier: Use code TRACY for $300 off at https://airdoctorpro.com/AquaTru - water filter: Use promo code for TRACY for 20% off at https://aquatru.com/ACORNS Early debit card and smart app for kids: acornsearly.com/tracy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Tracy and her husband, Greg, dive into one of the most common relationship traps: the urge to fix rather than connect. After a personal moment of miscommunication, they break down how well-intentioned problem-solving can actually push partners further apart instead of bringing them closer.Greg shares his instinct to fix problems quickly, while Dr. Tracy unpacks the deeper emotional needs that often go unmet when one partner jumps straight to solutions. Through relatable stories, vulnerable reflections, and real-life relationship tools, they explore why fixing is often a way to manage our own discomfort—and what to do instead.Click play to find out why fixing isn’t always helping—and what to do instead. And don’t forget to share this episode with the fixer in your life.RESOURCES:Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz: Take it hereReady to deepen your connection? Download my 100 QuestionsBuild better connection and feel close starting today. Join the 30 Days to Us ChallengeHeal old wounds and build healthy interdependence with my book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” - order here! LINKS:Vionic Shoes: Use code TRACY for 15% off at https://www.vionicshoes.comAir Doctor Pro - air purifier: Use code TRACY for $300 off at https://airdoctorpro.com/AquaTru - water filter: Use promo code for TRACY for 20% off at https://aquatru.com/ACORNS Early debit card and smart app for kids: acornsearly.com/tracy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Answering your questions!In this bonus episode, Dr. Tracy answers a powerful listener question: “Is divorce contagious?” She explores how a friend’s separation can impact our own relationship, the research behind social contagion, and why moments like these often reflect unspoken needs or desires. Taking her 18 years of working with clients through all seasons of their relationship, Dr. Tracy reminds listeners that while divorce isn’t truly “catching,” it can be a mirror inviting us to pause and reconnect.If you’re feeling the distance in your relationship and looking to reconnect, join Dr. Tracy's More Than Roommates Challenge or try her 30 Days to Us.LINKS:Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    Heal old wounds and build healthy interdependence with my book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” - order here!   Episode Sponsors:Learn more about AQUATRU: Use promo code for 20% off TRACYLearn more about ACORNS: acornsearly.com/tracy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever reacted in a way that felt… bigger than the moment? Maybe your partner forgets to check in, and suddenly you feel unimportant or abandoned. Or you receive a small piece of feedback and spiral into shame. You might wonder, “Why am I like this?”In this episode, Dr. Tracy guides you through how to identify when your inner child is showing up—and how to begin healing those younger parts of you that still carry unmet needs and emotional wounds.This episode explores:What the inner child really is (and what it isn’t)The subtle signs your inner child is driving your reactionsA personal story of when Dr. Tracy's own inner child took the wheel—and how she did the workThe exact steps Dr. Tracy uses with clients to heal emotional triggers and reparent themselves with compassionWhy understanding your inner child can transform not just your relationship with yourself, but with your partner and your loved onesIf you’ve ever said, “I know better, but I still react this way,” this episode will help you move from self-blame to self-understanding—and offer you a clear path to healing.Press play now to begin the powerful process of reconnecting with your inner child in a way that’s healing, grounded, and life-giving.LINKS:Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Build better connection and feel close starting today. Join the 30 Days to Us ChallengeHeal old wounds and build healthy interdependence with my book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” - order here!   Episode Sponsors:Learn more about AQUATRU: https://aquatru.com Use promo code for 20% off TRACYLearn more about ACORNS: acornsearly.com/tracy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, Dr. Tracy and her husband, Greg, tackle a communication struggle that so many couples face—understanding why saying "I'm afraid to tell you because of your reaction" backfires. It’s a fine line, and crossing it can quickly turn a conversation into an argument.Dr. Tracy shares a personal experience that sparked this discussion, including a thought-provoking comment from one of her social media posts that made her pause and reflect: Was she explaining her perspective, or was she being defensive? From there, she and Greg break down how context, emotional intelligence, and tone shape our responses—and why so many of us misinterpret each other in the heat of the moment.They also explore:- The subtle (but crucial) difference between sharing vs. putting up a defensive wall. (e.g., when you say "I'm afraid to tell you because of your reaction")- How social media has blurred the lines of healthy communication by over-labeling behaviors.- Practical strategies to recognize and shift defensiveness in real-time.- The power of slowing down, validating emotions, and staying connected even in difficult conversations.This episode will leave you rethinking the way you respond to your partner—and help you approach communication with more clarity and intention. If you've ever struggled with feeling unheard, misunderstood, or frustrated in your relationship, this conversation is a must-listen.Hit play now and share this with someone who needs to hear it.LINKS:Join the popular More Than Roommates challenge and feel more connected in ten daysDownload my free Defensive Script GuideJoin Acorns and start saving for your kids: https://acornsearly.com/tracy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever felt lonely in your own relationship... longing for romance but afraid to ask for it? You’re not alone. So many of us crave connection, but the fear of rejection, disappointment, or even feeling like a burden keeps us silent.In this episode, Dr. Tracy and her husband Greg dive deep into the emotional weight of longing for more while holding back our true desires. They unpack why asking for romance can feel so vulnerable, how past experiences shape our fears, and the subtle ways resentment builds when needs go unmet.Dr. Tracy and Greg discuss the steps you can take to break free from this cycle. This episode offers simple, actionable shifts to express your needs without guilt or fear. Because you deserve love, effort, and connection in your relationship. Ready to create more romance in your relationship? Join my popular 10-Day More Than Roommates challenge! Created for the busiest couple, each day you'll receive three exercises to help you feel close and more connected. I won't tell you to kiss your partner, but by the end of the challenge, you'll want to kiss your partner. LINKS:Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    Heal old wounds and build healthy interdependence with my book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” - order here!   Learn more about ACORNS: acornsearly.com/tracyLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever been told that if something still triggers you, it means you haven’t healed? This idea oversimplifies trauma, healing, and how the nervous system actually works.In this episode, Dr. Tracy is breaking down why triggers aren’t just signs of unresolved wounds but natural responses from your nervous system—and why healing isn’t about never being triggered, but about recovering faster.We’ll explore:What Polyvagal Theory teaches us about triggers and emotional reactionsHow your vagal brake helps regulate stress—and what happens when it’s weakWhy some triggers come from systemic or relational harm, not just personal traumaWhat resilience really means for the nervous systemThrough real client stories and my own experiences, you’ll learn how to stop blaming yourself for your reactions and start working with your nervous system, not against it.If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by triggers or questioned whether you’re “healed enough,” this episode will give you the insight and tools to navigate emotional responses with more self-awareness, compassion, and resilience.Press play to learn how to reframe your triggers, regulate your nervous system, and move through life with greater ease.Links:To grab the books and resources I mention in today's episode:Books mentioned in this episodeFor Therapists and CoachesReady to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   Challenge the stories you tell yourself: Download my free guide!Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Most people approach arguments with one goal in mind: winning. But what if winning an argument actually means losing something far more important—connection?In this episode, Dr. Tracy sits down with Jefferson Fisher, a trial lawyer and viral communication expert, to explore why people approach conflict the wrong way. Jefferson shares practical strategies that will help you stay in control, reduce defensiveness, and shift from a "you vs. me" mindset to an "us vs. the problem" approach.In this episode, they discuss:Why winning an argument often damages the relationshipA simple phrase that instantly de-escalates conflictHow to say difficult things without fear or avoidanceA key mindset shift that transforms the way couples communicateFor anyone who has felt frustrated by recurring fights or struggles to be heard in their relationship, this episode offers game-changing insights. Communication doesn’t have to feel like a battle—learn how to argue better, not harder.Grab Jefferson Fisher's New Book "The Next Conversation: Argue Less, Talk more"Follow Jefferson Fisher on InstagramLinks:Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The butterflies have faded, the sparks feel dim, and now… it’s like you’re just coexisting. You love each other, but your relationship feels more like roommates than romantic partners. Sound familiar?In this episode, Dr. Tracy and Greg dive into what really happens after the honeymoon stage—why passion shifts, why connection starts to feel harder, and why so many couples struggle with feeling distant as life gets busier.If you’ve ever thought:Why doesn’t it feel the same anymore?Are we falling out of love, or is this normal?How do we get back what we had?This episode is for you. You’ll learn:✔️ The biggest misconceptions about love after the honeymoon stage.✔️ Why feeling like “roommates” doesn’t mean you’re broken—it means you’re human.✔️ Practical ways to bring back connection, even when life feels overwhelming.If you’ve been craving more intimacy, laughter, and closeness in your relationship, hit play now.Podcast Episodes Mentioned:From Escalation to CalmStop Sidestepping ConflictLinks:Free Guide: Change Your Stories, Change Your Relationship100 Questions to Deepen Your Connection30 Days to Us - All New Connection ChallengeMore Than Roommates ChallengeRelationship Repair Program Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you do when a partner replies with “Well, I guess I’ll just never … again” after you share something with them? In this episode, Dr. Tracy and her co-host Greg answer this question and talk about how to respond to a partner’s "all or nothing" statement in response to a concern raised. Dr. Tracy talks about the underlying emotion in this expression, provides strategies for having a constructive conversation in that situation, and how to break out of this tricky cycle that stops couples from feeling close and connected.Links:Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! https://drtracyd.com/connectWant your questions answered on the show? Submit them here! https://drtracyd.com/podcast You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here! https://drtracyd.com/bookLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices