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The Better Behavior Show with Dr. Nicole Beurkens

Latest episodes

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Jan 26, 2022 • 48min

Episode 193: How to Make Food Fun For Picky Eaters & Children With Sensory Issues

My guest this week is Sarah Appleman. In this episode, Sarah and I discuss fun ways to help picky eaters and children with feeding issues get more comfortable with new foods, how to deal with various issues surrounding food, how sensory issues impact eating habits and preferences, and redefining what success “in the kitchen” really means. Play With Your Food is a game-changer for any parent that is struggling with their child at mealtime and looking for simple solutions that reduce the stress while improving the variation in your child’s diet. Sarah Appleman is a published author, speaker, and pediatric occupational therapist. She holds a master's degree in Occupational Therapy and specializes in early intervention for children diagnosed with sensory processing dysfunction. She co-owned Paws for Peds in Long Beach, New York, and created a handwriting curriculum utilizing a multi-sensory approach to handwriting. In her newly released book Play With Your Food, Sarah combines her passion for working with the special needs population with baking through fun therapeutic interventions, activities, and tips. She guides caretakers and kids to enjoy participation in the food preparation experience with fun games while improving the food tolerance of picky eaters. Learn more about Sarah: Website Instagram - @PlayWithYourFoodbook Episode Takeaways: Introduction to Sarah Appleman … 00:01:15 Pediatric OT, Sensory, and Feeding Issues … 00:04:05 Connection of Sensory Processing & Eating Issues … 00:10:00 Thorough Intake History & Parental Memories … 00:14:16 Bringing Children into the Kitchen Early … 00:17:20 Kids Stuck in Rigid Eating Habits … 23:07 Favorite Activities to Play with Food and Kids … 00:25:54 Plan Activities when Your Schedule is Less Stressful … 33.35 Success with New Foods isn’t Just Measured by Eating It … 00:35:27 Making Comparisons to What They are Comfortable with … 00:39:55 Play with Your Food & Free Resources … 00:43:46 Connect with Dr. Nicole: Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Jan 24, 2022 • 31min

Episode 192 Q&A: What To Do When Extended Family Members Disagree With Your Parenting

This week’s question is from Janetta, “I have two kids, one has been diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety. He struggles with regulating his behavior and can be quite difficult to manage at times. My partner and I have been learning a lot from you and others about how to understand what's going on with him and to support him better, but I feel like other people in our life just don't get it. For example, my in-laws refuse to acknowledge that our child has challenges. They don't believe in the diagnosis or any of the treatment or supports we have been pursuing. They almost seem ashamed of it. They blame our parenting and continue doing and saying things that aren't helpful, even though those things are not working well. Do you have any advice on how we can address this? I want to have them in our kids' lives, but it's just so stressful for all of us.”                                           In this episode, I will address when extended family members, especially your own parents, seem unwilling to accept your child's challenges, differences, or needs. These different opinions in parenting among extended family can be extremely stressful, but let’s first understand the potential underlying reasons for their lack of acknowledgment or support.  That understanding then gives you a framework for considering how to communicate and navigate through the differences of opinion and any uncomfortable family dynamics.  You can submit a question by emailing us at support@drbeurkens.com with the subject line "Podcast Question." Episode Takeaways: Not a 1-Size-Fits-All Approach to Parenting through Challenges … 00:02:55 Understanding Your Family's Lack of Acceptance … 00:05:07 Recognizing the Source of Their Underlying Discomfort … 00:07:21 Having Empathy for Them is Helpful for You … 00:13:30 Tangible Strategies Starting with Education … 00:17:10 Clear, Open, and Honest Communication … 00:19:58 When to Give Explanations and What to Include … 00:24:10 Be Patient, You Don’t Need Them to Agree with You … 00:25:10 Who Needs to Take the Lead in Addressing Among Family … 00:28:12 Connect with Dr. Nicole: Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Jan 19, 2022 • 45min

Episode 191: Want to Raise Financially Responsible Children and Teens? Teach These Simple Skills…

My guest this week is Scott Donnell. In this episode, Scott and I discuss how to teach children about money and finances so they can have a healthy relationship with money, develop initiative, be generous, and raise them into responsible adults with the financial literacy skills they need. Finances can be a taboo topic to some and unfortunately, it isn't required in the school curriculum, so as parents, we are responsible for helping our kids learn these skills so that we can minimize problems for them later on. It’s never too late to learn these important life skills, even as adults, with a few easy tips and resources, your child can be fully financially capable by the time they are a teen.   Scott Donnell is a serial entrepreneur who has dedicated his life to both physical and mental health. He's the founder of Apex Leadership Company, a fitness fundraising and leadership program for elementary schools nationwide. Apex has net profited $110 million for schools and now has 55 franchises and 3.6 million customers across the nation. Scott is also the founder of the Hapbee, which is a wearable tech specializing in ultra-low frequencies and can record small magnetic fields from chemical solutions. Its ability to play safe low energy, magnetic signals enable it to replicate feelings, such as happy, alert, relaxed, calm, and sleepy. It's one of my favorite wearables, (maybe we will do a different show on that). Currently, Scott is working on a project called GravyStack, the platform to raise financially capable, generous self-starters. He is also a dad.   Episode Takeaways: Episode Intro … 00:00:30 Introduction to Scott Donnell … 00:01:30 Need for Financial Literacy Starting in Youth … 00:04:00 If You Don't Master Money, it Will Master You … 7:24 Teaching to be Financially Smart, Not Spoiled … 00:10:30 Finances are the Biggest Problem with Married Couples … 00:14:05 Tangible Practices to Teach Financial Literacy … 00:18:30 Using GravyStack or Physical Jars to Teach … 26:50 Quiz to Find out Beliefs You Have Around Money … 00:31:21 Free Business Fair for Kids to Learn Safe Business … 33:56 Adult Resources for Learning Financial Literacy … 00:37:45 Episode Wrap up … 00:43:16 Connect with Dr. Nicole: Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Jan 17, 2022 • 24min

Episode 190 Q&A: How Can I Help My Child If I Don’t Have An Accurate Diagnosis?

This week’s question is from Alan and Cara, “We have a seven-year-old adopted daughter who has struggled with all aspects of regulation and development since she came home with us as a young toddler. She has sensory processing issues, major eating and sleeping issues is hyperactive and impulsive, learning issues, generally is difficult for kids and adults to get along with. Raising her has been challenging to say the least, and the ways that we have handled our other two kids just don't seem to be very effective for her. There are lots of things we could ask questions about, but the issue we are struggling with right now is getting an accurate diagnosis for her. She's been seen by many professionals and has had many labels given like ADHD, possible Autism, ODD, anxiety disorder, learning disorder, feeding disorder, and sensory processing disorder. We are confused about how all these labels can be accurate, and feel like the real diagnosis hasn't been determined yet. She's scheduled to see another clinician next month, and we hope that maybe she can give us a definitive diagnosis. We feel like until we get the right diagnosis, we can't figure out the best way to help her. What suggestions do you have for getting an accurate diagnosis and treatment plan for a child like this?” In this episode, I will address the parent’s concerns about getting an accurate diagnosis. The most important thing to remember is that chasing a diagnosis can be a life-long challenge with no real end result. But treatment can start now! Though it may seem like it, a diagnosis is not the key to developing an appropriate treatment plan for your child, specifically in the realm of psychology and mental health. Clinical diagnoses have their place and can be helpful in opening doors, but they can also be extremely limiting and get you and your child stuck on the frustrating hamster wheel of no progress.  I will talk about how to shift the focus toward progress so you can help your child be their best by looking at symptoms and not getting hung up on the labels. You can submit a question by emailing us at support@drbeurkens.com with the subject line "Podcast Question." Episode Takeaways: How do we get the right diagnosis? … 00:01:15 Getting a Definitive or “Right” Diagnosis … 00:02:23 Concern with Fixating on the Diagnosis or Label … 00:08:17 Diagnosis is Not the Key to Developing an Appropriate Treatment Plan … 00:11:15 Where is the Answer Found? … 00:13:25 What is My Clinical Evaluation Process … 00:17:35 How the Digging Deeper Workshop Can Help … 00:21:45 Connect with Dr. Beurkens:  Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Jan 12, 2022 • 50min

Episode 189: How To Prevent Cavities And Help Children Understand Why Oral Health Is Important

My guest this week is Dr. Staci Whitman. In this episode, Dr. Staci and I discuss all things oral health, cavities, and children. The mouth could just be the tattletale you actually want in your child’s life! There’s a forgotten link between oral health and systemic health/immune function. Issues in the mouth can actually be one of the first clues that something bigger might be going on physically or brain-wise that we need to deal with. So helping kids have healthy mouths is about a lot more than just the cavity issue. Dr. Staci and I dive into contributing factors to rampant cavities and other oral health issues we are continuing to see at younger ages. She shares many tips on how to make dental hygiene non-negotiable in an approachable and realistic way, as well as overcoming (and avoiding) anxiety and dental phobias. Dr. Staci provides lifestyle tips, resources, and product suggestions that she uses in her pediatric dental practice that can support your whole family’s health journey. Dr. Staci Whitman is on a mission to create a world without cavities. She's the founder of NoPo Kids Dentistry, where she takes a whole-body holistic and functional approach with her patients. She attended Tufts University School of Dental Medicine and worked as a general dentist for two years, and then went on to earn a certificate in pediatric dentistry from Oregon Health and Sciences University. In 2019, she founded NoPo Kids Dentistry, became a diplomate of the American Board of Pediatric Dentistry, and is a board-certified pediatric dentist and fellow of the American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry. She has taken numerous courses and training in children's sleep and airway medicine, studying oral myofunctional therapy, cranial-sacral therapy, and is a Breathe Institute ambassador. She's also an internationally certified health and wellness coach, and dreams of a world without cavities, and believes in motivating families to join her as a team, keeping their children healthy and thriving with small, manageable daily changes. Episode Takeaways: [00:01:38] Introduction to Dr. Staci Whitman & Holistic Dentistry [00:06:45] How the Mouth is Significantly Connected to Overall Health [00:10:18] Why Kids Are Having More Cavities and Oral Health Problems [00:15:45] Chewing and Facial Development [00:18:36] Cavities: Causes and Reversal & Prevention [00:26:00] Tips for Brushing and Flossing for Kids [00:32:06] Reducing Anxiety & Phobias Around Dentist Visits [00:36:40] Systemic Health & Airway Health [00:41:26] Deep, Oxygenated Quality Sleep is Foundational [00:43:24] Oral Microbiome Importance [00:46:43] Resources and Episode Wrap Up Connect With Dr. Nicole: Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Jan 10, 2022 • 24min

Episode 188 Q&A: What To Do When My Child Acts Disappointed After Receiving A Gift

This week’s question is from Erica, “I’m wondering how to deal with the inevitable disappointments that come from my kids when they get gifts sometimes. They are six and nine years old, and it seems like every time a fun event or season comes around, there ends up being disappointment, tears, and even temper flares. They get ideas in their head about how things will be and not everything works out that way. Or they have all kinds of things they want for gifts, but they don't get all of them. We just went through this for Christmas, and now they have birthdays coming up in the next two months, and I don't want a repeat. How can I help them handle the disappointment better?”                                        When a child seems "ungrateful" or "spoiled" after receiving a gift, it can be embarrassing for the parent. But what's really going on when a child expresses disappointment when receiving gifts? It's not that they are spoiled or that there is a lack of gratitude, but rather an issue of reacting to disappointment. I'll break down what your child might be going through and how to deal with it in the moment. And more importantly, how to preemptively ease any potential let-downs ahead of time and navigate through embarrassment or discomfort should a negative reaction occur from your child in a group or home setting. You can submit a question by emailing us at support@drbeurkens.com with the subject line "Podcast Question." Episode TimelineFeelings of Disappointment Doesn't Equal Spoiled …  00:01:55 Parenting Through a Child Expressing Disappointment … 00:04:00 Tips for Handling a Child's Disappointment … 00:07:56 Questions to Preview with Your Child … 00:09:57 Problem-Solving Approach for When Disappointment Occurs … 00:14:15 When a Child has a Negative Reaction in the Moment … 00:19:12 Connect with Dr. Nicole Beurkens: Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Jan 5, 2022 • 55min

Episode 187: How To Help A Child Manage Stress Before It Negatively Impacts Development, Mood, And Behavior

My guest this week is Josh MacNeill.  In this episode, Josh and I discuss teaching children how to manage stress and the ways in which stress affects brain development in children. There is a stronger need now, more than ever, for adults to understand how stress impacts a child's brain. Stress affects a child's ability to function in all areas of their life—developmentally, academically, socially, and behaviorally. So we are going to first discuss stress tolerance, how stress can vary, the capacity for stress, what stress looks like through the lens of a child, and then wrap up by exploring ways in which we can help children become more resilient when encountering stress both in school and at home.   Josh MacNeill began his career as a high school English teacher in an alternative school just outside of Philadelphia. While he was teaching, his organization began to take steps towards becoming a more trauma-informed school and Josh was an early adopter. He saw a lot of success utilizing brain-based and trauma-informed strategies in his own classroom, and quickly found himself with opportunities to train other teachers on the approaches he was using. In 2015, Josh shifted out of the classroom and became the director of Neurologic by Lakeside, a program focused on transforming schools to become more trauma-informed and neurodevelopmentally supportive environments for all learners. (Love that.) Since then, Josh and his team have had the privilege of working with tens of thousands of individuals across the world. Additionally, Josh is an adjunct professor in Eastern University's MD program and published the book 101 Brain Breaks and Brain-Based Educational Activities. Josh, thanks so much for being here. It's great to have you with us today. Episode Takeaways What is Stress & How it Impacts the Brain … 00:07:10 “Stress” is in the Eye of the Beholder ... 00:12:25 What is the Root of the Stressors? … 00:17:38 Building Stress Tolerance & Tips … 00:18:30 Finding Individual Stress Sweet-Spots … 27:22 Empathy for Variance in Stress Capacity … 00:31:00 Adults Being Transparent & Vulnerable … 00:36:40 Neuroplasticity: Ability for the Brain to Change … 00:40:18 Recognizing Individual Approaches to Stress … 00:44:58 Professional and Parental Stress Resources … 51:05 Connect with Dr. Nicole Beurkens: Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Jan 3, 2022 • 28min

Episode 186: What To Do When Your Child Is Struggling To Get Out Of Bed In The Morning

This week’s question is from Adrienne, “My 10-year-old son is virtually impossible to wake up and get going in the mornings. He is struggling to get out of bed and can't seem to wake up easily no matter what we do. This turns into a big argument, struggle, and stress for me and my husband every day. My husband tries to threaten and punish, which I don't think is helpful, and then he and I get into an argument about it. I just want my son to do what he needs to do with getting up and going without all of the morning drama. I'm not sure if there's something physically wrong or another issue we need to look at, but I'm worried about what's going to happen to him in the future if he doesn't learn to wake up on his own.”                                          In this episode, I will address how to get your groggy or resistant child going in the morning. Trying to get everyone out the door in the morning can be stressful, especially when you have a child that struggles to get up. It can cause a lot of problems not just for the child but also between parents and siblings. Sure, some people are just biological early birds but for others not so much. There could also be some other things going on that are interrupting sleep which would make it difficult for your child to wake up early. I’ll give you some tips on what to investigate to see if perhaps it’s a sleep issue. If you have a child who is groggy, resistant, or slow to start in the mornings, this is the episode to listen to for tips to get “up and at’em” without the struggle or drama! (Hint: these tips aren’t just for sleepy kids either!) Episode Timestamps Sleep Cycles & Morning Grogginess … 00:01:33 Parenting Approaches Between Parents … 00:04:14 Is Sleep Quality a Potential Root Cause? … 00:06:30 Evaluating Bedtime & Sleep Hygiene … 00:08:50 Nutrition, Supplements, Medication & Sleep … 00:10:12 Talk with Your Child About Their Observations … 00:14:25 Strategies  for Difficult Mornings … 00:17:42 Connect with Dr. Nicole Beurkens Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Dec 29, 2021 • 45min

Episode #185: Plant Medicine Can Help Children With Better Brain Function, Behavior, and Sleep

My guest this week is Dr. Dan Gubler. In this episode, Dr. Dan and I discuss the power of plants for supporting brain function, behavior, ADHD, sleep, anxiety, and more. We talk specifically about how the bioactive compounds in plants, called phytonutrients, can be used therapeutically to improve specific symptoms and their necessity in overall health through diet. Plants used for medicine is anything but a new concept, however, more education in this area is needed for parents to feel confident in trying plant-based therapies for their children. So Dr. Dan and I cover what to look for in a quality supplement, safety with plant-based medicine, and concerns when combining natural supplements together or with other medications.   Dr. Dan Gubler is a natural product chemist that has traveled to every continent, discovering and researching bioactive compounds in plants and using them to help others. He has 16 patents and has developed 70 nutritional supplements. He is an expert on how phytonutrients can improve health conditions. He is a member of the London Speaker Bureau, has spoken at over 150 events in 40 countries, and is co-founder and chief scientific officer at Brilliant, an innovative proactive wellness company that creates nutritional supplements to help people unleash their innate brilliance. He is also the host of Discover with Dr. Dan, the proactive health podcast. Episode Timestamps: Plant Compounds and Phytonutrients … 00:05:38 When Pharmaceuticals are Necessary  … 00:09:38 Bioactive Compounds Plants & Anxiety … 00:11:39 Quality Standards to Look for in Supplements … 00:15:24 CBD, Hemp, Cannabis … 00:18:00 Safety and Awareness of Mixing Plant Compounds … 00:24:25 ADHD, Anxiety and PMDD: Supplements and Plant Compounds … 00:27:00 Therapeutic Dosage May Vary from Bottle Dosage … 00:31:27 Autism Spectrum Disorder & Natural Compounds … 00:33:27 Sleep Supplements & Kids … 00:36:06 Compounds for Mood & Emotional Balance … 00:37:52 Phytonutrient Resources  … 00:41.54 Connect with Dr. Nicole Beurkens on... Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com
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Dec 22, 2021 • 47min

Episode 183: How To Raise A Parent - We Can All Learn How To Be More Conscious And Self-Aware

My guest this week is Ellen Gottlieb In this episode, Ellen and I discuss what it means to be a conscious parent and self-aware person.  This is an episode for everyone, not just those with atypical neurodevelopmental children. We talk about bringing a level of awareness to our relationships with our kids, to the approaches that we take with them that allow us to have a deeper, respectful, connected relationship so they can grow into the people they are meant to be in this world. You will find that this actually involves us as adults doing a lot more work on ourselves: with our ego, reactivity, unconditional love, reflection, and presence than it is with our kids. Our children will be okay if we are okay.  Ellen Gottlieb is an attorney and certified Conscious Parenting Coach. She coaches parents and individuals, teaching them how to live a more mindful, joyful life. Ellen recently published her new book called “How to Raise a Parent: Becoming A Conscious Parent In An Unconscious World.” She has been successfully guiding parents as she teaches them to shed their entrenched patterns and create deeper connections with their children, which fosters self-confidence and reduces anxiety. Episode Timestamps: Episode Intro … 00:00:30 Ellen Gottlieb from Attorney to Parenting Coach … 00:03:04 Conscious Humans & Mountain Awareness … 00:07:49 What Does it Mean to Be a Conscious Parent … 00:10:12 Separating Our Stories and Accepting What Life Actually Brings … 00:14:15 Hurt, Punishment, Fear and Control in Parenting … 00:17:55 Raising Ourselves as Parents … 00:22:43 Direct and Intergenerational Trauma … 00:25:48 Fearing a Child Won’t Outgrow Behavioral Challenges … 00:29:19 Where to Start with a Conscious Toolbox … 00:32:02 Recognizing Fear, Honoring Special Time and Presence … 00:37:32 Becoming A Conscious Parent In An Unconscious World … 00:43:55 Episode Wrap up … 00:45:24   Follow Dr. Nicole: Connect with Dr. Nicole Beurkens on... Instagram Facebook Drbeurkens.com

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