Bossed Up

How can you reclaim your power in a job that’s just “good enough”?It turns out The Perfect Job isn’t nearly as common as the LinkedIn posts would have us believe. Most of us spend our working hours in a job that’s okay but far from perfect. The good news is that you can thrive in a just-okay career if you embrace the art of “leading yourself.” In this episode, I sit down with Elizabeth Lotardo to talk about this very concept, which doubles as the title of her new book, Leading Yourself. Elizabeth has spent years helping people at all different stages of their careers discover the potential that awaits when they stop pursuing perfection and begin taking charge of the job they’re already in.Learn to maximize the job you already have by uncovering:The reason we feel like we’re failing if we aren’t holding out for the perfect job;Why it can be empowering to “give up on the dream” of getting a paycheck from our passionHow small changes in your day-to-day can make a huge difference;And when you might need to phone it in before you fall apart.Related Links:Leading Yourself: Find More Joy, Meaning, and Opportunities in the Job You Already Have (Despite Imperfect Bosses, Weird Economies, Lethargic Coworkers, Annoying Systems, and Too Many Deliverables) - https://bookshop.org/p/books/leading-yourself-elizabeth-lotardo/20999467?ean=9781394238705&next=tElizabeth’s website - https://www.elizabethlotardo.com/Follow Elizabeth on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/elizabethlotardoDrop the Ball: Achieving More by Doing Less by Tiffany Dufu - https://bookshop.org/p/books/drop-the-ball-achieving-more-by-doing-less-tiffany-dufu/8440970LEVEL UP: a Leadership Accelerator for Women on the Rise - https://www.bossedup.org/levelupBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

Feel like you’re the only one keeping your friendships going? Recently, I received a letter from a listener about an extremely relatable issue: how to build or rebuild stronger friendships when it seems to be increasingly difficult to do so.You’ve probably experienced some shifts in friend frequency and intensity throughout your adult years. Making plans and finding the right people to share platonic relationships with gets harder as our priorities shift and our lives get more hectic. In this episode, I explore some of the ways I’ve dealt with this increasingly common and publicized problem myself.Spark some hope with these actionable approaches to fixing your friendships:Identify exactly what’s missing from your relationships;Normalize and ritualize casual hosting;Keep resentment from curbing your call for companions.Related Links:I’m Starting to Think You Guys Don’t Really Want a “Village” on Slate - https://slate.com/life/2024/11/parenting-advice-friends-loneliness-village.htmlStuff Mom Never Told You, Can We Be Friends? - https://www.iheart.com/podcast/105-stuff-mom-never-told-you-21123631/episode/can-we-be-friends-30231271/Americans Need to Party More on The Atlantic - https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2025/01/throw-more-parties-loneliness/681203/Bossed Up Episode 479: America’s Parents Are Not Okay - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode479TAKE ACTION with Bossed Up - https://www.bossedup.org/takeactionBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

How do you get what you need from the people in charge?It’s not just people managers who need to be good at influencing conversations; anyone who interacts with a supervisor or even a more dominant personality benefits from learning how to manage up. That’s what I’m covering today with Melody Wilding, the author of a new book, “Managing Up: How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge.”The book combines Melody’s work in emotion research and therapy with her professional development experience to teach everyone—from the new hire to the department director—how to communicate with confidence and comprehensive understanding, regardless of how different their and their boss’s communication styles might be. Improving this skill set has huge positive effects on not just how we rise at work but also how much we enjoy our time there.Hear Melody’s insights to expertly manage your workplace conversations, including:Why you need to get into your boss’s head;How to set boundaries that ensure your time and expertise are respected; How to plant the seed for your next promotion;Where assertive communication and advocacy at work overlap.Related Links:Order “Managing Up: How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge” - https://melodywilding.com/managingup/Melody’s website - https://melodywilding.com/Episode 218, “Managing Your Inner Critic” - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode218SPEAK UP: An Assertive Leadership Course for Women in the Workplace  - https://www.bossedup.org/speakupBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

You’ve heard of paid family leave—but what about paid prenatal leave? Today’s episode highlights good news for women, workers, and families in the Empire State. As of January 1, 2025, New York enacted a first-of-its-kind new benefit that provides 20 hours of paid prenatal leave benefits to all pregnant private-sector workers.Learn more about this groundbreaking new law and what it could mean for the rest of us:What rights pregnant New York workers are now entitled to;How this benefit came to pass in the New York State House;And how we might advocate for similar legislation nationwide. Related Links:Episode 414, New Rights for Pregnant Workers - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode414Episode 311, How to Talk About Marital Status, Parental Status, and Pregnancy in the Interview - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode311Episode 494, Matrescence and the Transformation of Motherhood - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode494TAKE ACTION with Bossed Up - https://www.bossedup.org/takeactionBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

What do you know about matrescence? Most people will agree that everything changes with parenthood, and that’s what this term covers: the process of becoming a mother. Yet, despite shared private understanding and a large body of recent research on all the physiological and mental effects, many policies and medical processes continue to ignore what mothers have always known.Lucy Jones is a journalist and the author of Matrescene: On The Metamorphosis of Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Motherhood. In this episode, we delve into what’s lacking in support for matrescence and why, and how ongoing research, policy changes, and sharing information through resources like Lucy’s book can help change the conversation. Whether you’re already a mother, are considering becoming one, or support one in any way, Lucy’s insights will be enlightening and empowering.Discover the details of matrescence and why we need to talk more about it:The origins and importance of having a word for this universal, natural experience;The impact of not having enough information in the early months and years of parenthood;The permanent changes the brain goes through during this period;The social disconnect between the expectation to give birth and the lack of support.Related Links:Matrescence: On Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Motherhood by Lucy Jones - https://bookshop.org/p/books/matrescence-on-the-mind-body-spirit-transformations-of-pregnancy-childbirth-and-motherhood-lucy-jones/20398692Lucy’s website - https://lucyfjones.com/Discover all of Lucy’s books: https://lucyfjones.com/books/Lucy on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/lucyfjones/Episode 333, An Honest Look Into Motherhood and Health - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode333Episode 488, Talking Menopause at Work - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode488Pregnancy leads to long-lasting changes in human brain structure, Nature Neuroscience - https://www.nature.com/articles/nn.4458The Birth Of A Mother by Alexandra Sacks - https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/08/well/family/the-birth-of-a-mother.htmlOf Woman Born: Motherhood as Experience and Institution by Adrienne Rich - https://bookshop.org/p/books/of-woman-born-motherhood-as-experience-and-institution-adrienne-rich/8794956?ean=9780393541427LEVEL UP: a Leadership Accelerator for Women on the Rise - https://www.bossedup.org/levelupBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

Today’s episode marks my return from maternity leave, and a lot has happened in the world since I was last behind the mic! I’m kicking off my return with a recap of the past few months and sharing my future vision for the Bossed Up podcast.Tune in to hear my thoughts on election 2024,  transitioning from one child to two, and how the many hats I wear will impact the conversations we cover here in the coming months.Tune in for some hot takes, reflections, and my vision for the future, including:Two observations that stuck out to me most during this campaign cycle;How becoming a “girl mom” has impacted my mindset;And a few experiments I’ll be exploring with the podcast this year.Related Links:Episode 479: America’s Parents Are Not Okay - http://bossedup.org/episode479Episode 477: The Impact of State Abortion Bans on HR Politics - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode477Episode 469: Surprising Trends Impacting Women At Work - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode469Episode 463: A Different Approach To My Second Maternity Leave - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode463Boy Mom: Reimagining Boyhood In The Age of Impossible Masculinity by Ruth Whippman - https://bookshop.org/p/books/boymom-reimagining-boyhood-in-the-age-of-impossible-masculinity-ruth-whippman/20583177?ean=9780593577639&next=t&next=tNYT: Masculinity is on the Ballot https://www.nytimes.com/2024/08/17/opinion/masculinity-liberal-conservative.htmlWTF Podcast with Marc Maron - https://www.wtfpod.com/podcastTAKE ACTION with Bossed Up - https://www.bossedup.org/takeactionBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

How can positive psychology help curb burnout? We’re a bunch of overachievers here in the Bossed Up community, and burnout is a pretty common thread between us. Burnout is painful, frustrating, and—as my guest on this episode explains—more avoidable than we might think if we’re willing to work on “working happier.”Stella Grizont was named the world’s leading happiness expert by TIME Magazine. She uses her master's in Applied Positive Psychology to help leaders find career fulfillment and organizations engage their employees more deeply. We discuss her recent book and how her approach can help you help yourself, leading to more enjoyment in work and in life.Embrace Stella’s thoughtful approach to positive psychology by uncovering:The impact of negativity bias and a play mindset when navigating uncertainty;How to practice self-compassion when waffling between anxiety and excitement;Learned optimism and the three Ps that can help you cultivate a brighter outlook;Why we should focus on “What do I want to be?” before “What do I want to do?”Related Links:The Work Happiness Method: Master the 8 Skills of Career Fulfillment - https://www.stellagrizont.com/work-happiness-method-bookDownload the Vision Generator - https://stellagrizont.mykajabi.com/visiongeneratorSign up for Stella’s newsletter on her website - https://www.stellagrizont.com/Connect with Stella on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/stella-grizont-a4b7792/Connect with Stella on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stellagrizont/Oprah speaks to finding your vision - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XfrOcfc8zNsLEVEL UP: a Leadership Accelerator for Women on the Rise - https://www.bossedup.org/levelupBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

When did you first experience imposter syndrome? So many people resonate with feeling like frauds who sweet-talked their way into their positions and could be found out, socially ostracized, and fired at any moment. Imposter syndrome or impostorism is often seen as a women’s issue, and I am always quick to stress this isn’t the case—it’s a human issue. A recent report provides some new numbers that raise a different question: is impostorism a men’s issue? In this episode, I break down what these findings really reveal.It’s time to refocus the imposter syndrome conversation:Why this is so often considered a women’s issue;What the research says about who really experiences impostorism;Which traits actually lead to feelings of ineptitude.Related Links:The original research on imposter syndrome - https://www.paulineroseclance.com/pdf/ip_high_achieving_women.pdfKorn Ferry’s Workforce 2024 study - https://www.kornferry.com/content/dam/kornferry-v2/featured-topics/pdf/workforce-2024-report.pdfFortune, The Share of Fortune 500 Businesses Run By Women Can’t Seem to Budge Beyond 10% - https://fortune.com/2024/06/04/share-of-fortune-500-businesses-run-by-women/Harvard Business Review, Women Rising: The Unseen Barriers - https://hbr.org/2013/09/women-rising-the-unseen-barriersEpisode 425, The Gender Confidence Gap Myth - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode425LEVEL UP: a Leadership Accelerator for Women on the Rise - https://www.bossedup.org/levelupEmilie’s book, “Bossed Up” - https://www.bossedup.org/bookBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

Why is it so hard to remember that we deserve to be heard? Staying silent in our professional lives can feel like the safe choice, but it can have unintended consequences on our overall career trajectory. In this episode, Elaine Lin Hering shares what her research, experience in mediation and conflict management, and new book "Unlearning Silence" have to say about why so many of us—especially women—are reticent to raise our voices. She highlights the intrinsic connection between wielding our voices—both audibly and through our actions—and recognizing our self-worth. Examine the ways that silence impacts your own life, including:Where does our tendency toward silence stem from?;Why we need to question and dismantle the “babble hypothesis”;Why just talking more isn’t the goal of unlearning silence;How leaders can actively push back against silencing team members.Related Links:Elaine’s book, Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully - https://elainelinhering.com/book/Episode 428, Finding Your Voice at Work - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode428Episode 246, Lessons from Improv to Own Your Voice and Speak Up at Work - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode246Episode 377, What all women can learn from women of color in leadership with Deepa Purushothaman - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode377Episode 445, 3 Tips For Managing Too Many Meetings - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode445SPEAK UP: A Live Assertive Communication Course For Women In The Workplace - https://www.bossedup.org/speakupMicro Activism: How You Can Make a Difference in the World Without a Bullhorn by Omkari L. Williams - https://bookshop.org/p/books/micro-activism-how-to-use-your-unique-talents-to-make-a-difference-in-the-world-omkari-williams/19716521?ean=9781635866889Babble Hypothesis Research - https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1048984320300369Bossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/

We need to talk about the impact of the childcare crisis on the workforce! Some people may wonder why this topic matters beyond its impact on families of young children. The truth is, this issue has wide-reaching ramifications for the nation’s economy as a whole, and that deserves our attention whether we have children or not. In this episode, I share what the research and statistics reveal about the direct link between the exorbitant price of childcare and the labor shortage that’s crunching companies across the U.S. Let’s break down why this is a problem everyone should care about:The disproportionate impact of childcare costs on different demographics;The broader ramifications on the economy as a whole;What organizations can do to start making a difference.Related Links:Episode 424, The Jobs of America’s Next Silicon Valley https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode424Episode 434, The Economic Imperative of Affordable Childcare - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode434EPIC- Executives Partnering To Invest In Children - https://www.coloradoepic.org/Episode 463, a Different Approach to My Second Maternity Leave - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode463Episode 479, America’s Parents Are Not Okay - https://www.bossedup.org/podcast/episode479Child Care and Development Fund (CCDF) Program - https://www.federalregister.gov/documents/2016/09/30/2016-22986/child-care-and-development-fund-ccdf-programHow Much Childcare Costs by State in the USA in 2024 - https://illumine.app/blog/how-much-childcare-costs-by-state-in-usa/Economic Data Underscores the Need for Significant, Sustained Investment in Child Care and Early Learning - https://www.ffyf.org/resources/2021/12/latest-economic-data-underscores-the-need-for-significant-sustained-investment-in-child-care-and-early-learning/Over Half of Families are Spending More Than 20% of Income on Child Care - https://www.ffyf.org/resources/2022/06/over-half-of-families-are-spending-more-than-20--on-child-care/How Child Care Disruptions Hurt Parents of Color Most - https://www.americanprogress.org/article/child-care-disruptions-hurt-parents-color/U.S. Child Care Crisis Is Holding Back The Workforce - https://www.forbes.com/sites/mariaflynn/2023/11/02/us-child-care-crisis-is-holding-back-the-workforce/U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics showing the labor force that is “Employed - With a job, not at work, Childcare problems” - https://data.bls.gov/timeseries/LNU02096055$122 Billion: The Growing, Annual Cost of the Infant-Toddler Child Care Crisis - https://strongnation.s3.amazonaws.com/documents/1598/05d917e2-9618-4648-a0ee-1b35d17e2a4d.pdf?1674854626&inline;%20filename=%22$122%20Billion:%20The%20Growing,%20Annual%20Cost%20of%20the%20Infant-Toddler%20Child%20Care%20Crisis.pdf%22UPS Expands Emergency Day Care After Pilot Program Cuts Turnover - https://www.hrdive.com/news/ups-emergency-day-care-pilot-program-cut-turnover/697205/Atlanta Mayor Andre Dickens Joins UPS CEO Carol B. Tomé at the 2023 UPS Impact Summit - https://about.ups.com/us/en/newsroom/press-releases/our-strategy/2023-ups-impact-summit.htmlTAKE ACTION with Bossed Up - https://www.bossedup.org/takeactionBossed Up Courage Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/927776673968737/Bossed Up LinkedIn Group - https://www.linkedin.com/groups/7071888/