Your Secret Is Safe With Me

How can you lower your levels of anxiety, stress, and negativity? Is it possible to change how you feel by changing the way that you think? And, can you improve your relationships by learning how to be more present? According to Dr. Richard Gold, mindfulness and meditation are the keys to relieving your stress, boosting your mood, and even improving your relationships. He suggests that by changing how you think about your circumstances, you can affect psychological changes and form new pathways in your brain. This means that you can start creating new, meaningful relationships with yourself and others by learning to shift your focus and stay grounded in the present moment. In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Richard Gold, the President and Executive Producer of Metta Mindfulness Music and the Co-founder of the Pacific College of Health and Science, joins Dr. Marie Murphy to discuss the psychological benefits of mindfulness, meditation, and music. Dr. Gold shares how you can start making psychological changes using meditation, the important ways mindfulness can impact your relationships, and his tips for finding your way out of a rut. Stay tuned!

Dealing with the loss of any relationship can be difficult, and the end of an affair is no different. However, because of the secretive and taboo nature of infidelity, navigating the emotional aftermath can be confusing and lonely — especially if there’s nowhere to turn for support. So, how can you manage that lingering sadness and find the right path forward? If you’re looking for a better way to deal with your emotions after an affair, Dr. Marie Murphy suggests that you begin by changing how you think about it. As she says, you don’t have to change your situation in order to reframe how it affects you. And, according to Dr. Murphy, when you learn how to rethink your narrative, you gain the power to turn even the most painful situations into opportunities for growth and transformation. In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy discusses how to navigate the emotional aftermath of ending an affair. Dr. Murphy explains how the end of an affair can result in disenfranchised grief, why over-analyzing your feelings can lead you off course, and what you can do to regain the power to move forward. Plus, Dr. Murphy shares how to determine if ending the affair was the right decision for you. Stay tuned.

Leaving a bad relationship can be scary when you don’t have the resources to support yourself on your own. But, figuring out how to manage your finances is only part of the equation. Dealing with your emotional entanglements with money can be just as challenging as you work to get yourself back on track—and prepare for future relationships. This was especially true for Financial Coach Christine Luken, who had to deal with the painful financial aftermath of leaving a seven-year relationship. That experience taught her a lesson that her accounting classes never covered: emotions play a massive role in finances. Now, Christine helps her clients navigate their emotional relationship with money and improve the ways they handle finances in and out of their romantic partnerships. In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy sits down with Christine Luken, the Founder of the Financial Dignity® Movement, to discuss the often-overlooked relationship between emotions and money. Christine discusses the financial fallout she experienced from her past relationship, the challenges of her emotional and financial recovery, and the tactics she uses to help clients break free from the money shame cycle. Stay tuned!

You should never try and fit yourself into a mold of someone else's preferences. But, deciding to go against societal norms can be challenging. So, how do you know if a big decision—such as opening up your relationship—will be worth it in the end? When Susan Wenzel decided to try nonmonogamy with her partner, she struggled with a range of difficult emotions before finding happiness. As she says, we can’t know what the future holds, but we are responsible for our choices—including how we choose to perceive our circumstances. By taking responsibility for what she could control and letting go of the things she couldn’t, Susan achieved greater happiness, freedom, and growth, both in and out of her relationship. Join Dr. Marie Murphy in this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me as she sits down with Susan Wenzel, a Certified Sex Therapist and Relationship Expert, to discuss life outside of monogamy. Susan shares her personal experience transitioning to an open marriage and explains how she helps couples navigate various nonmonogamous relationships. Plus, Dr. Murphy and Susan talk about the power of letting go of the things that prevent you from being happy. Stay tuned.

Recovering from an affair is a difficult and emotional process. From dealing with shame to deciding whether or not to move forward, many couples aren’t sure of how to begin healing. Wouldn’t it be helpful if there was someone you could turn to for guidance on your journey to a new and stronger relationship? After working with couples who were recovering from infidelity, Idit Sharoni realized that what they needed most was a roadmap to healing—so she created one. Although the path isn’t necessarily linear, Idit helps couples embark upon their journey with an actionable plan. According to her, there are steps that every couple can take to increase their relationship’s chances for survival and even build something stronger than what they had before. Join Dr. Marie Murphy in this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me as she sits down with Idit Sharoni, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, to discuss how couples can heal after an affair. Idit describes the steps involved in her roadmap to recovery, what couples can do to increase the chances of saving their marriage, and how to determine whether you’re ready to begin the next chapter in your relationship. Stay tuned!

Most people would agree that your partner can’t fill every role in your life, but what happens when they’re unwilling to explore your sexual desires? If you love your spouse and don’t want to break up your family, do you simply accept going without and learn to live with suppressing your sexual needs? After spending years repressing her sexual desires and coping with feelings of rejection in her marriage, Nikki S. concluded that it was her responsibility to fulfill her own needs. So, she decided to start a “double life” and seek sexual fulfillment elsewhere. But, before pursuing a secret affair, Nikki made sure she was clear on her goals and had a strong safety plan in place. Join Dr. Marie Murphy in this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me as she sits down with Nikki S. to discuss the risks and rewards of having a secret affair. Nikki describes the emotional toll of being rejected by her husband, the empowerment she felt when starting an affair, and what happens when the emotional boundaries we set for ourselves don’t work. Plus, Nikki offers some practical advice on protecting your anonymity and staying safe. Stay tuned!

Affairs can be intoxicating, but they can also leave you feeling confused and ashamed once the excitement wears off. So, why do people cheat, and what makes an affair difficult to end? And, once you’ve been caught in your lie, how can you salvage your relationship? A lot of the answers for why we do what we do can be traced back to the chemicals flooding our brains. Much like being under the influence of a drug, our chemical response to a new or elicit relationship can make it difficult to see things clearly—and it can take time for the reality of a situation to fully set in. However, according to Dr. Tammy Nelson, even if you’ve cheated, you still have plenty of choices for how to move forward. As she suggests, there are ways to rebuild your relationship in the aftermath of an affair, but you may need to start with a whole new foundation. Join Dr. Marie Murphy in this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me as she sits down with Sex and Relationship Expert, Dr. Tammy Nelson. Together, they discuss why affairs are often so exciting, the brain chemicals that influence how we interpret new relationships, and the importance of revisiting your monogamy contract after someone cheats. Plus, Dr. Nelson offers scientific insight into why people lie and provides advice on what to do if you’re the one cheating. Stay tuned.

Getting out of an abusive relationship is extremely difficult, but the work doesn’t end there—not if you truly want to revitalize and reinvent your life. But, where do you begin when you’re ready to start over? Alta M. Felix understands how difficult it is to move on and begin to heal after surviving trauma. She has experienced firsthand what it’s like to rebuild after leaving an abusive relationship, and now she wants to help other women let go of the past and work toward a better future. With her strategies and techniques, you can overcome your trauma and start pursuing a life full of self-love, trust, and confidence. In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy is joined by Altagracia (Alta) M. Felix, a Certified Money Coach (CMC), Trauma Mentor, and the CEO of R2E. Together, they talk about how you can take back control of your life after an abusive relationship and acknowledge your trauma without letting it trap you. Alta also shares some tips for rebuilding trust, learning how to forgive, and keeping the past out of your new relationships. Stay tuned!

All relationships change over time, but how often do you renegotiate the rules surrounding them? What happens when a long and happy marriage becomes sexless? Do you have options beyond ending the marriage or compromising your needs? After spending time in therapy with her husband trying to deal with their differing sex drives, Janine came up with a solution. Instead of throwing away her entire marriage over one missing part, she decided to outsource that one aspect to save the rest. Now, she is in a satisfying affair and her marriage is even happier than before. Join Dr. Marie Murphy in this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me as she sits down with Janine to discuss how having an affair helped save her marriage. Janine explains why she decided to have an affair and how she navigated an agreement with her husband. She also shares what it’s like to seek out a partner using Ashley Madison, the strategies she deploys for managing her emotions, and what she’s learned about relationships and herself along the way. Stay tuned!

Money is a taboo subject in any situation—but when it comes to relationships, talking about finances can feel downright impossible. With financial stress being one of the top causes of divorce, it’s no wonder that most of us would rather avoid the topic altogether. But, according to Couples Financial Coach Adam Kol, skirting the conversation often only makes things worse. With years of experience helping couples sort out the messy details around love and money, Adam Kol will be the first to tell you that avoiding these conversations is a quick way to start building resentment. As he says, perhaps we should be less afraid of what happens when we have these conversations—and more afraid of what happens when we don’t. Fortunately, Adam has the tools to help you start talking so that you can keep your relationship and finances healthy. Join Dr. Marie Murphy in this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me as she sits down with Couples Financial Coach, Adam Kol, to discuss why people dread having conversations about money with their partners. Together they talk about why financial communication is so important, the benefits of opening up, and the consequences of avoidance. Plus, Adam explains how to get these conversations started and offers some pointers on navigating common mistakes. Stay tuned!