Real Men Feel with Andy Grant

The introduction of this episode may give you flashbacks to high school English classes, but you'll be fine. Today we explore the power of making a choice; choosing to see the light, being of service, and improving all that you can. My guest is Christian de la Huerta, a sought-after spiritual teacher, personal transformation coach, and leading voice in the breathwork community. He has traveled the world offering inspiring and transformational retreats combining psychological and spiritual teachings with lasting and life-changing effects. His new book, Awakening the Soul of Power, has won multiple awards and was described by Gloria Estefan as "a balm for the soul of anyone searching for truth and answers to life's difficult questions." We explore choice, empowerment, and freedom. Christian sees heroism in pausing, taking a breath, and choosing your action instead of automatic reactions. There is tremendous heroism in doing the inner work, facing our demons and shadows instead of numbing out and self-medicating. Do not underestimate the courage it takes to own and share our feelings. Christian shares the tool he finds best for healing past trauma effectively and quickly. We discuss the need to update the traditional roles of men, including the provider and the explorer. The conversation also touches on our conflicted relationship with power. Topics and Questions 2:02 - The opportunity at the dawn of each new year to make a choice. 3:24 - You write about personal power and heroism. Have you always felt your heroic self? 4:30 - Tell me about your upbringing. 6:08 - How do you define heroism? 10:17 - The react and regret cycle. 12:11 - Every emotion will be felt. 12:30 - What does it mean to be a man in the 21st century? 13:58 - What is the healthiest way to express masculinity? 17:17 - The Explorer role 18:05 - What does soulful power mean? 22:38 - What are some examples of being in that soulful power? 25:35 - Is there any ideal first step to switch from egoic power to soulful power? 26:24 - What helped you to go within when you first wanted to make changes? 27:59 - Andy's experience with Holotropic Breathwork. 30:42 - A shared experience of self-sabotage in high school. 37:00 - Awakening the Soul of Power is Book 1 in your Calling All Heroes series. Can you share anything about what's to come? 39:47 - What's the best way for people to learn more? Links Christian de la Huerta -- https://soulfulpower.com Check out Awakening the Soul of Power - https://amzn.to/3wjOUf2 See Andy's book, Healing & Mystical States Are Just a Breath Away - https://amzn.to/3QT7owi Watch Christian's TEDx Talk, The Power of Breath - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLAziEkvUT8 Interested in a Clarity Call with Andy? - visit https://theandygrant.com/talk Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/realmenfeelshow/ & https://www.instagram.com/theandygrant/ Personal Website | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | http://realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel

As we are still in the early days of the new year of 2023, ideally - there's lots of introspection, planning, hope, and possibilities to make this year your greatest yet! Let's explore allowing life to drive the show instead of our ego. This week's guest is Dr. Morgan Oaks, a transformational speaker, chiropractor, and high-performance coach focused on men elevating their greatness. His tools include NLP, shamanic healing, and energy work. He believes in listening to our intuition to take inspired action. Dr. Morgan blends ancient wisdom with the tools of modern transformation to bring synergy to healing and personal growth. Morgan shares his journey of waking up spiritually by being curious, uncovering his intuition, trusting synchronicity, and taking inspired action to fuel his desire to help heal the world. Call it gut instinct, hunches, or anything else; intuition shows up as subtle hints, but the more you trust it by listening and acting accordingly, the louder and more precise it can grow. Morgan shares a few simple yet powerful ways to cultivate your intuition. We discuss the importance of curiosity and slowing down. As well as enjoying the journey and handling the one constant in life; change. Topics and Questions 1:04 - I see a common theme in all you do of being of service. Is that something that's always been important to you? 2:37 - Did you only realize you were missing service once you experienced it? 4:57 - I've met some chiropractors who are very spiritual and others that are very mechanical. Is that more the individual than the training? 6:30 - What got you to take part in the healing ceremony? 8:04 - Is that ceremony experience what prompted you to learn more about energy work? 9:50 - Had you been conscious of your intuition before that? 10:27 - In hindsight, what do you think was the big trigger for your awakening? 14:55 - How do you define intuition? 19:58 - What are some ways to cultivate our intuition? 22:15 - What are some keys to men creating their best lives? 24:22 - Using clarity as a crutch. 25:50 - Being spiritual and physical. 30:01 - Can you share a habit, practice, program, or book that has helped you? 34:14 - What are you looking forward to? 35:41 - What's the best way for people to learn more? "I believe the universe is conspiring in our favor, but it can't help us unless we take action." - Dr. Morgan Oaks Links Dr. Morgan Oaks -- https://drmorganoaks.com Check out Morgan's Men's Retreat in Mexico! - https://www.drmorganoaks.com/mexico Recommended book: The Alchemist Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast: Interested in a Clarity Call with Andy? - visit theandygrant.com/talk Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel

I have yet to meet anyone who hasn't suffered some form of trauma. It seems that the human experience was made to include trauma. Trauma doesn't just mean physical abuse, sexual abuse, and war. It can be more minor things like not having all your needs met at any point in childhood. The simplest definition of trauma is anything too high in magnitude for you to deal with at the time. My guest today, Greg Wieting, helps leaders and entrepreneurs heal anxiety, depression, chronic pain, and trauma so they can lead with bold and courageous hearts. For two decades, he's helped hundreds of clients reduce or eliminate their dependence on antidepressants, anxiety, pain, and sleep meds. He addresses the unresolved trauma that causes inflammation, compromises immune function, stagnates emotion, fogs thought, and creates hormonal imbalance. He is the founder of PRISMA – a framework overlaying trauma, neuroscience, and energy medicine with somatic and mindfulness-based practices. He developed this while healing his anxiety, depression, and chronic pain rooted in trauma. This included unraveling a severe spinal curvature and standing three inches taller today! We explore attachment wounding, unmet needs, and unresolved trauma. As well as the benefits of energy medicine and trying things you've never heard of. Topics and Questions 1:52 - Tell me a bit about your experience with trauma growing up. 7:23 - I'm not a random collection of chemicals 7:50 - Is the state of being overwhelmed different for each person? 9:54 - What was your chronic pain caused by? 12:48 - What were some of the first things you did that helped and gave you hope? 16:41 - What are some common mistakes regarding trauma and healing? 20:21 - Can all trauma be healed? 23:14 - How does energy medicine work? 26:01 - Animals can physically shake things off. Do you think humans were ever like that? 28:54 - Tell me more about PRISMA. 32:44 - Is there anything you wish you had learned at a younger age? 34:36 - Your spine straightened out on its own? 36:02 - Can you share a habit, practice, program, or book that has helped you? 40:12 - What are you looking forward to? 41:37 - What's the best way for people to learn more? "I think healing is developing a really robust, compassionate relationship from ourselves to ourselves." - Greg Wieting Links Greg Wieting -- https://gregwieting.com Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast: Interested in a Clarity Call with Andy? - visit theandygrant.com/talk Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @andy_grant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel

I believe everybody has a mission, a calling, a purpose to their life, and part of life's great joy or frustration is discovering that. I don't recommend my path, which was multiple suicide attempts before I finally got there must be a better way, and I began doing the inner work. Today we are diving into purpose! My guest today is men's mentor Cooper Heller. Cooper is a personal trainer, nutritionist, and life coach who helps men clarify their purpose, upgrade their physical health, and develop a winning mindset. Cooper shares how an injury in high school upended his seemingly perfect life. He became addicted to opioids, overweight, and severely depressed. After discovering the importance of nutrition and mindset in his recovery, Cooper saw tremendous improvements in his outlook and life. He launched his first company in college, focusing on fitness, nutrition, and mindset. We explore purpose, fulfillment, spirituality, divinely orchestrated events, and much more. Topics and Questions 1:10 - Tell me a bit about what happened to you in high school. 5:19 - What was your mood and mindset like before your accident? 5:50 - Was purpose something you thought about while growing up? 6:22 - How important is mindset to having a fulfilling life? 7:11 - What was telling you there was something more? 8:25 - Is purpose static, or does it change over time? 8:55 - What do you say to someone who thinks "it is completely possible to live an amazing, fulfilling life and do what you love to do." is complete bull shit? 10:36 - Any suggestions for people to help discover or clarify their purpose? 13:49 - Most of what we worry about in our youth doesn't matter. 14:48 - "If you don't have adversity, you aren't living much of a life. You are flatlining." - Bob Proctor 15:34 - Is one of the biggest hurdles to purpose believing you have one? 17:21 - Is there one more thing you wish more men knew about purpose? 17:56 - The lie of "trying." 18:32 - Can you share a habit, practice, program, or book that has helped you? 19:27 - Do you have any insights on choosing a good mentor? 21:26 - Is purpose only in vocation or career? 21:53 - What are some signs that you are in alignment with your purpose? 23:44 - What man had the biggest impact on you? Tell me about him. 24:57 - What are you most proud of? 26:07 - Do you still have a connection with friends from before your accident? 27:10 - What are you looking forward to? 28:25 - What is the best way for people to learn more about your work? 28:45 - The ego trip of working with a young man as a mentor. "The only true failure in life is not striving for why you're here." - Cooper Heller Links Cooper Heller -- https://www.instagram.com/cooperbheller Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast: Interested in a Clarity Call with Andy? - visit theandygrant.com/talk Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @andy_grant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel

A couple of days ago, I came across an Instagram post from an account called awake_spiritual, and it was a picture of Dwayne Johnson - The Rock, and it was called Things I Know at Age 45 That I Wish I Knew at 22. It had a list of 14 such things. I don't believe this is anything The Rock said, but maybe it is. It got me thinking about what I would tell my 22-year-old self. I had a few items right away and let my brain simmer with them for a bit. I've got five, and then I'll also share all 14 that the IG post mentioned too. What I would tell my 22-year-old self: Life is good. --- I thought life sucks, then you die. Life is good, and you are worthy of joy. Nothing, I repeat, NOTHING you are worried about ends up mattering much at all. The only definition of what it means to be a man that matters is yours. Whatever you are doing, that's what a man does. Action cures fear. Do the things you're afraid of. You can be right, or you can be happy. Please choose happy. Maybe you agreed with most, maybe with none. I don't care. I do care that you take a few minutes to think about this for yourself. What would you tell 22-year-old you? Or if you are a young man, what would you tell your 16-year-old self? Don't let the ages mentioned be your excuse not to do this. Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast: Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @andy_grant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Let's Talk - visit https://theandygrant.com/talk Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel

WARNING: This episode discusses suicidal thoughts and attempts. If you are in crisis, do not listen to this episode. Please call or text 988 to be connected to trained counselors that are part of the National  Suicide Prevention Lifeline network. https://988lifeline.org If you are outside of the US, please search for suicide prevention in your country. https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/11181469 Last November - 2021 - I stopped doing all the positive things in my life. I chose to dive straight into depression, solitude, and misery. I stopped doing this podcast. I stopped leading men's groups. I stopped being open to new coaching clients. I stopped exercising. I stopped every positive daily ritual I've developed over the years. The exact circumstances of what started this dark period aren't important because there is always something we can focus on to our detriment. This life can be heaven or hell; it comes down to us; our outlook, perception, thinking, judgment, and actions. I took minimal action for months. I wanted to remind you and myself where I was a year ago because of the rapid change, resilience, support, and positive energy that is available to all of us - but not until we are willing to accept it. Whenever you feel like shit, if you are under siege by your own thoughts saying you should check out of life early - do something for somebody. Make some effort of service for another human being. I find that always changes my mood and outlook. Life is good. You are good. Please allow yourself to feel that truth. If you need daily reminders to be of service, to share yourself, and better your mood - I recently discovered Do Good December - a monthly calendar of simple things you can do to spread more love and kindness. I've posted it to Real Men Feel Facebook and IG pages, and I'll make sure it is part of this episode's post on RealMenFeel.org if you want to track it down. Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast: Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @andy_grant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel

My returning guest today is Dr. Avrum Weiss. Dr. Weiss is a psychotherapist, award-winning author, speaker, and teacher. His decade-long work on understanding the inner lives of men culminated with his recently published bestseller "Hidden in Plain Sight: How Men's Fears of Women Shape Their Intimate Relationships." We talk about what a man's lack of sexual desire means for a relationship and the root causes of that low desire. Learn what men are taught about sex that harms our relationships and how not to see sex as a performance. "Think of foreplay as starting the minute you open your eyes in the morning" ~Dr. Avrum Weiss Too many men ignore their sexual desires and use sex as validation and reassurance. Sex is about more than orgasm. Men often get a bad rap as being selfish lovers, but your pleasure does matter. Topics and Questions 1:50 Is there a particular fear that men have of women, or are there lots of them? 2:50 - The reason behind low sexual desire in men. 4:15 - Why are men so preoccupied with women's orgasms? 6:55 Men are not experiencing a whole lot of pleasure in sex. 10:23 - If men's fear of women goes back to Adam and Eve, is that just how it is? 11:49 - Do men cover up their distress from women? 12:21 - How do men go over this sense of competition in sex? 14:43 - How do we get men and women to understand each other better? 15:24 - What are men afraid of related to sex? 17:27 - Is monogamy an artificial creation? 20:07 - Humans are driven by fear. 20:52 - Do women and men see sexual issues or challenges the same way? 22:34 - Cultural differences around the world. 23:22 - What is the best step for a man with low sexual desire to change that and improve his relationship? 24:33 - Is there one more thing you wish more men knew about sex? 26:48 - Don't make sex the last thing you do in a day 31:08 - What women say they learned from their mothers about men. 32:32 - What is the best way for people to learn more about your work? Links Avrum Weiss PhD -- https://www.avrumweissphd.com/ Hidden in Plain Sight: How Men's Fears of Women Shape Their Intimate Relationships -- On Amazon Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast: Interested in a Clarity Call with Andy? - visit theandygrant.com/talk Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @andy_grant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel

For the first time, Real Men Feel is on location. This week's show checks in from Covenant House's Sleep Out in Boxboro, Massachusetts. Andy took part in a fundraising event for Covenant House that involved giving up his bed for one night to raise funds to get more young people off the streets. People choose to spend a night outside to help those who don't have a choice. We talk with Jill Vorndran, Covenant House's Chief Development Officer. Topics and Questions 2:59 - What is going on tonight? 3:25 - Is this a global event? 3:54 - What is the point of the Sleep Out? 4:34 - What is the age range of Covenant House clients? 5:30 - What are you saving people from? 8:12 - Is this an annual event? 9:38 - It is an issue of individual circumstances that brings someone to Covenant House. You can create a Sleep Out event at any time by visiting CovenantHouse.org. Andy shares his immense gratitude for all his blessing. You can contribute to the cause until the end of the year. Please visit https://www.sleepout.org/participant/andygrant "I attempted to treat Friday like a typical day, but it wasn't possible. I knew I'd get less sleep at the Sleep Out, but I didn't expect how little I got. My thinking and energy were a struggle. I fell asleep twice in my office chair while attempting to work. I couldn't hit the gym, conversations were a challenge, and editing this week's show took much longer than it would normally. I fell asleep around 9 pm Friday and slept straight till 7 am Saturday. This was all from only one night on the streets. Many homeless people have full-time jobs, are full-time students, or even both, and can't afford a safe place to live. They deal with the daily battle of never having enough sleep and struggling to think clearly. If you are not in that situation, please give some compassion to those who are." Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast: Interested in a Clarity Call with Andy? - visit theandygrant.com/talk Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @andy_grant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel

Real Men Feel hosts conversations that most men aren't having but that all men can benefit from. My favorite sort of guest is someone who shares their journey and how they are now serving people. That's what we have for you today. My guest is healer, coach, and men's group facilitator Justin Gagne. We talk about seeking more depth, being called to your purpose, loss, grief, anger, and recovery from alcoholism. Justin's experience in the darkness made him want to help others through that faster. We explore being an empathetic child, the gifts of Covid isolation, and doing the inner work to become a better version of yourself. Justin expresses his anger over losing his mother and the resulting spiritual awakening. Including powerful experiences and lucid dreams with his guides. We discuss the importance of embracing your masculine and feminine energy. Justin shares how his father was a role model for service to others, showing him what soft, kind, gentle men could look like. Topics and Questions 1:04 - What prompted you to want to lead men's groups? 1:52 - Have you always been seeking more depth? 2:22 - What experiences let you know you were being called to something? 4:04 - What were you angry about? 6:40 - What was the turning point for you? 7:45 - Could you work on yourself while drinking or only after? 11:57 - The healing power of being of service. 13:00 - What were your experiences as a kid? 15:52 - What first got you into healing? 19:31 - What does divine masculine mean to you? 21:53 - What man had the most significant impact on you? 23:36 - Does he know how much he means to you? 24:37 -What are you proud of? 26:10 - What are you looking forward to? 26:45 - How does someone know the right direction? 29:45 - Is there anything you wish you had learned at a younger age? 31:08 -What is one thing you wish more men knew? 33:02 - How can people learn more or connect with you? Connect with Justin at https://www.facebook.com/TheSavingLight Grab some gear at realmenfeel.org/swag. Interested in a Clarity Call with Andy? - visit theandygrant.com/talk Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @andy_grant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel

Right now, I should be volunteering at a New Warrior Training Adventure, a weekend event run worldwide by the ManKind Project. But a couple of weeks ago, Oct 11 to be exact, it was canceled by MKP USA. All the planned New Warrior Training Adventures, NWTAs, were canceled in the US for the rest of 2022. The cancellations were due to charges of cultural appropriation from a group of Native American elders called Spirit. First off, let me clarify that I am a middle-aged white American man. I have no insight into what it means to be Native American, or any other race or culture for that matter. I am sharing my opinions and asking questions. I am not representing any other individual or group. And I'm willing to be wrong about everything I think I know. When I discovered that all NWTAs were canceled, I was shocked, disappointed, and hurt. My NWTA was back in October 2016. There was a lot of Native American ritual and ceremony, and it was presented very respectfully, honoring where they came from and giving full acknowledgment. It was stressed how much training ManKindProject (MKP) men had with the Lakota people to learn what we would be doing. I thought cultural appropriation meant taking something from another culture and claiming it as your own. MKP never did that in anything I was involved in. Nobody in MKP claimed to have invented the sweat lodge or any other rituals I took part in. The sweat lodge seems to be the main point of contention, but it is just one of many different events that make up the NWTA weekend. My brief research found that many cultures have used sweat lodges for purification, healing, and relaxation. Most commonly known are Native Americans, but also the Mayans, Aztecs, and across Europe as early as the 5th century. https://www.newworldencyclopedia.org/entry/Sweat_lodge MKP Statement included: "A public campaign against the ManKind Project over concerns about cultural appropriation launched in the evening of Oct 6, 2022. One aspect of the campaign encourages public protests at NWTA locations across the country. The locations of our events were published. After assessing the content on the website, it became apparent that to proceed would put MKP participants and volunteers at risk." America is a melting pot of hundreds of cultures. Borrowing from other cultures is inevitable; it can be positive. To me, it is the evolution of society. Centuries ago, people came to North America and saw natives as less than. The letter from Spirit (https://www.spiritprotection.org/letter-to-mkp) makes it clear that native people are still hurting. To me, MKP has been trying to honor the native practices they use, but it is not seen that way by all native leaders. You can do the right thing and still have it be the wrong thing. Earlier this year, the ManKind Project USA published a statement, “Acknowledging and Evolving Our Relationship with Indigenous Peoples and Practices.” Note: NWTA  events continue to happen outside of the US. Connect with Andy and RMF Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @andy_grant Personal Website | theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info! Podcast Website | realmenfeel.org for all things podcast-related! YouTube | Real Men Feel