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ICE needs more agents to meet Trump’s promised deportation numbers. But is loosening standards and shortening training time to get more agents on the street a good idea, when ICE’s work is becoming more controversial, confrontational, and dangerous?  Guest: Robert Klemko, Washington Post reporter covering policing and criminal justice reform. Want more What Next? Subscribe to Slate Plus to access ad-free listening to the whole What Next family and across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe today on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of our show page. Sign up now at slate.com/whatnextplus to get access wherever you listen. Podcast production by Elena Schwartz, Paige Osburn, Anna Phillips, Madeline Ducharme, and Rob Gunther. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode: Slate senior producer Cheyna Roth joins Zak Rosen and Elizabeth Newcamp to debate wedding ceremony etiquette. A listener’s kid is the flower girl at a friend’s wedding. But now it turns out the flower girl is NOT invited to the wedding reception. Is this fair? They dig into whether kids make a wedding better, logistics, and more.  But first, in another edition of Triumphs and Fails, Cheyna deals with a week-long bus cancellation, Elizabeth celebrates a big birthday, and Zak has to deal with Tooth Fairy fallout. Mentioned In the Episode: Who Owns the Tooth Fairy? - Decoder Ring Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318. If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get to hang out with us on the Plus Playground every week for a whole additional grab-bag of content — and you’ll get an ad-free experience across the network. And you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus – or try it out on Apple Podcasts. Listen to Opportunity Gap wherever you get your podcasts: ⁠⁠https://lnk.to/opportunitygapPS!careandfeeding⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s clear President Trump wants to send troops to Portland, Oregon. But it’s not clear why—especially to people who live there. Guests: Isaac Stanley-Becker, staff writer for The Atlantic. Elizabeth Lopatto, senior reporter at The Verge.   Want more What Next? Subscribe to Slate Plus to access ad-free listening to the whole What Next family and across all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe today on Apple Podcasts by clicking “Try Free” at the top of our show page. Sign up now at slate.com/whatnextplus to get access wherever you listen. Podcast production by Elena Schwartz, Paige Osburn, Anna Phillips, Madeline Ducharme, and Rob Gunther. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kate Lindsay and Candice Lim wade through the negative reactions to Taylor Swift’s album The Life of a Showgirl. From outdated meme references to clunky shots at other female artists, Swift’s album indicates an oddly distant relationship with the internet. However, is she a devious online mastermind or a blundering millennial? Plus, why it’s important that this album’s backlash has gone largely unchallenged by fellow Swifties. Get more of ICYMI with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of ICYMI and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the ICYMI show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/icymiplus for access wherever you listen. This podcast is produced by Vic Whitley-Berry, Daisy Rosario, Candice Lim, and Kate Lindsay. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Earlier this year, a tweet went out from the official account of the Democratic Party, tagging the Trump advisor Stephen Miller. It was an image of what appeared to be a simple hotel room chair. But for those in the know, it was much more than that: It was a “cuck chair,” an online meme straight out of a popular genre of hardcore pornography in which a man watches his partner have sex with another man. How did we get to a place where the Democrats could flame a political opponent with an image out of cucking porn and have millions of people immediately understand it? In this episode we trace the complicated and intricate history of the cuck. It’s a history that includes everything from Jacobean dramas to World War II pilots to, yes, pornography, as well as a host of deeply American prejudices that have become a lot less submerged over the last 10 years. And we also situate the cuck within a larger context, one in which porn is the elephant in the room of American culture. It’s a potent force, shaping and reflecting our very wants and desires and it is constantly seeping into mainstream culture—and yet we don’t analyze, critique, or even talk about it very much because, well, it’s porn. In this NSFW episode, you’ll hear from: Slate staff writer Luke Winkie who wrote about the tweet that kicked this episode off; Samantha Cole, one of co-founders of 404 Media and the author of How Sex Changed the Internet and the Internet Changed Sex;  Jennifer Panek, professor of English at the University of Ottawa; sex therapist and clinical psychologist Dr. David S. Ley; Dr. Justin Lehmiller, social psychologist, senior research fellow at the Kinsey Institute, and podcast host; Mireille Miller-Young, associate professor of feminist studies at UC Santa Barbara and the author of A Taste for Brown Sugar: Black Women in Pornography, and New York Magazine tech columnist John Herrman.  This episode was written by Willa Paskin. It was edited by Josh Levin and produced by Katie Shepherd, Willa Paskin, Max Freedman, and Evan Chung, Decoder Ring’s supervising producer. Merritt Jacob is Senior Technical Director, and we had help from Sophie Summergrad. We’d also like to thank Gabriel Roth, Talia Lavin, Tatum Hunter, Rebecca Fasman, Jessica Stoya, Aiden Starr, Perrin Swanmoore, Sophie Gilbert, and Kevin Heffernan, who was a fount of knowledge.  If you have any cultural mysteries you want us to decode, email us at DecoderRing@slate.com or leave a message on our hotline at (347) 460-7281. Get more of Decoder Ring with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of Decoder Ring and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the Decoder Ring show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/decoderplus for access wherever you listen. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this week’s show, our fighters Steve, Julia, and Dana enter the ring to tussle over The Smashing Machine, the Dwayne Johnson vehicle directed by Benny Safdie. Can they smell what the Rock is cooking? Is it a subtly modulated performance about a sensitive pro UFC fighter? Or, a shameless Oscar play?  Next, it’s on to the offbeat climes of Tulsa, Oklahoma by way of The Lowdown, a shaggy noir series created by Sterlin Harjo and starring Ethan Hawke. Finally, they gaze into the uncanny eyes of Tilly Norwood, the A.I. beauty that launched a thousand think pieces and a Hollywood freakout. On an exclusive bonus episode for Slate Plus subscribers, the panel unburies an old hatchet to discuss Elizabeth Gilbert’s newest memoir.  Email us your thoughts at culturefest@slate.com.  Podcast production by Benjamin Frisch. Production assistance by Daniel Hirsch. Endorsements Dana: The N+1 essay "Large Language Muddle" and Isaac Butler's deep dive on Daniel Day-Lewis in Slate. Julia: Walking in Coal Oil Point Natural Reserve. Steve: James Meek's essay in The London Review of Books "Computers that want things" and the novel Gargoyles by Thomas Bernhard (and welcomes listener suggestions for what else to read by Bernhard). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Yair Rosenberg, a staff writer at The Atlantic and author of Deep Shtetl, dives into the complexities of the Gaza negotiations. He discusses Trump's bold 20-point ceasefire plan, expressing skepticism about its authenticity. The conversation highlights Hamas's cautious acceptance and the temporary wave of hope it brought. Yair also breaks down the challenges of achieving lasting peace, including Netanyahu's political pressure and the intricate dynamics of negotiation. Tune in to learn what could shift the landscape in the coming days.

Ashanti Branch, founder of the Ever Forward Club, is an expert in mentoring boys and young men on identity and emotions. He shares insights on how to guide young boys away from toxic masculinity towards kindness and openness. Ashanti discusses the concept of the 'mask' young men wear, which conceals their true feelings. He emphasizes the importance of curiosity in conversations with boys, encourages exploring their interests for resilience, and introduces modern rites of passage to mark growth. His advice helps parents foster emotional health in their sons.

Peter van Agtmael, a renowned photojournalist and author of "Look at the U.S.A.: A Diary of War and Home," explores the complexities of war photography. He reflects on his disillusionment with iconic images and their real impact. Peter shares intimate stories about embedding with soldiers and the emotional toll of covering conflicts. He also discusses his shift towards documenting veterans and the ethical dilemmas of capturing deeply personal moments, including unexpected uses of his work in unexpected contexts.

Nitish Pahwa, a Slate staff writer specializing in prediction markets and sports betting, dives into the intricate world of legal gambling. He discusses how platforms like Kalshi and Polymarket operate under tight regulations and their competing dynamics with traditional sportsbooks. The conversation also touches on the implications of betting predictions on politics and crises, and the future of gambling amidst changing public attitudes. Additionally, the hosts talk about Bill Belichick's rocky start at UNC and the ongoing conflict between WNBA players and commissioner Cathy Engelbert.