Love Isn't Enough

In this 3rd episode in our series on attachment styles, Joree and John take attachment theory off the page and into real life, breaking down patterns into tangible examples of how anxious and avoidant patterns play out in the middle of an argument. As we know, arguments in love are never just about the dishes or the eye rolls; they’re often old wounds and hidden fears playing out in real time. A very common pattern underneath the dynamics is the anxious partner’s fear of abandonment, the avoidant partner’s shame and shutdown, and the painful stories of being “too much” or “not enough” that fuel disconnection. With humor, vulnerability, and hard-won lessons from their own relationship, Joree and John unpack how to slow down reactivity, spot the deeper patterns, and ways to practice repair that leads to true secure attachment. This isn’t theory — it’s the messy, human reality of how fights can either break you apart or bring you closer.   Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn’t Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

What happens when someone who feels “too much” falls in love with someone who feels “not enough”? For years, that was us - Joree, the anxious partner, and John, the avoidant partner - stuck in the push–pull dance neither of us fully understood. It created disconnection, frustration, and the same repetitive patterns… until we learned what was really going on beneath the surface. In this episode, we take you deeper into the understanding of attachment styles and why they matter; we share what it means to have attachment needs, and how when they are unmet, form attachment wounds and ultimately negative patterns in your relationship. If you’ve ever wondered why you keep getting stuck, and want to know the best thing you can do to shift into a better connection, this conversation will change the way you see your relationship, and yourself, and ultimately guide you in how to feel safe and secure.   Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn’t Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/  

In this heartfelt and vulnerable joint episode, we share our personal journey of healing from deep-rooted attachment wounds. We open up about the patterns we carried into our relationship—especially the anxious/avoidant dynamic that kept us stuck in cycles of disconnection—and how we consciously did the work to break free from it. Through honest reflection and therapeutic tools, we reveal what it took to stop reacting from old wounds and start relating from a place of safety and trust. We discuss how healing isn’t just an individual journey, but a relational one, and why creating a secure attachment—within ourselves and with each other—is the foundation for a thriving partnership. Whether you're in a relationship, seeking one, or doing the inner work to heal your past, this episode offers hope, insight, and practical tools for growing into deeper connection. Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn’t Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

In this honest episode, Joree and John share vulnerably (once again - they’re always being vulnerable!) how they’ve been feeling lately. It’s been a mixture of grief, sadness and fear about the state of the world, dealing with aging parents, being in physical pain, stress and navigating difficult family dynamics. Without awareness or tools, couples can either deal with these real-life stressors feeling alone in their pain, or even worse, turn their negative emotions onto each other, creating additional stressors for them to face. Luckily that doesn’t have to be the case, and Joree and John share many tangible tools that can support couples, but individually and together. Here’s a favorite tip: share with your partner where you’re at (your mood, energy levels or capacity) so that your partner can depersonalize your mood and do their best to pick up with the if they are able For many more effective strategies, check out this episode, especially if you and your partner are feeling the weight of the world.    Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn’t Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/  

On this raw and revealing episode of Love Isn’t Enough, Joree opens up about a powerful realization that shook her to the core: she’s a high-functioning codependent. Together, John and Joree explore what high-functioning codependency actually looks like—especially in women who seem to have it all together—and how it can quietly erode your sense of peace, boundaries, and self-worth. They dive into Terri Cole’s definition of HFCs, how childhood trauma and anxious attachment fuel overgiving, perfectionism, and people-pleasing, and the cost of constantly putting others’ needs ahead of your own. With vulnerability, real-life stories, and therapeutic tools, they unpack the emotional toll and begin the path toward healing. If you’ve ever felt exhausted by doing it all, unsure of where your needs fit in, or afraid to stop performing for love—this episode will feel like a mirror… and a lifeline. And remember, you don’t have to earn love by doing. You are already worthy—just as you are. Listen now to learn: What high-functioning codependency is (and how it sneaks up on you) The roots of HFC: childhood dynamics, hyper-responsibility, and fear of abandonment How to begin healing through boundaries, self-worth, and inner reparenting Why awareness is the first act of liberation What to do in your relationship when one of you realizes you are a HFC Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn’t Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

Your mindset shapes your relationship more than you might realize. In this episode of Love Isn’t Enough, we unpack the powerful research on mindset and how your beliefs about growth, change, and learning directly influence the success of your relationship. Do you believe yourself or your partner to “just be the way you/they are”? Or do you approach challenges as opportunities to grow, both individually and together? We explore how a growth mindset is essential when it comes to developing the emotional and relational skills that lead to a thriving partnership. From conflict repair to deeper intimacy, we’ll show you why being open to learning, rather than needing to be right, is the real secret to long-term connection. Tune in to shift your thinking—and strengthen your love. Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn’t Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/

Explore the silent damage of contempt and stonewalling in relationships, two toxic behaviors that erode trust and connection. Learn how communication breakdowns, such as criticism and defensiveness, can lead to emotional abandonment. Discover personal insights on the importance of emotional regulation and self-awareness during conflicts. Embrace cognitive flexibility to foster healthier interactions and shift from a confrontational mindset to compassion and understanding. This discussion encourages proactive steps toward relational growth and connection.

Explore the relationship pitfalls of defensiveness and criticism, major players in relationship dissatisfaction. Discover how these behaviors create barriers to empathy and undermine effective communication. Delve into practical tools for compassionate conversations, emphasizing the importance of emotional safety for healthy dialogue. Learn about the 'Four Horsemen' and how awareness can help couples break toxic patterns. This insightful discussion fosters understanding and connection, crucial for building resilient relationships.

What if your love story started with a contest? In this episode of Love Isn’t Enough, we’re joined by Evin Rose and Alex Terranova, a couple whose unique journey to love is anything but ordinary. Alex, a coach and podcast host, decided to run a contest to find a date to bring to Tulum, Mexico—and Evin, a dating and self-worth coach, entered on a whim. What started as an unconventional experiment turned into a deep and meaningful relationship.   We dive into: • The inspiration behind Alex’s contest and why he chose this unconventional approach to dating. • What made Evin say “yes” to entering—and how she navigated the experience. • How their relationship evolved from a playful beginning into something real and lasting. • The power of intention, trust, and alignment in building a healthy partnership. • Lessons they’ve learned about love, vulnerability, and creating a relationship that thrives.   This episode is a must-listen for anyone looking for love in unexpected ways—or who simply loves a great modern love story!   Connect with Evin Rose & Alex Terranova: • Evin’s Instagram: @evinrose • Evin’s website: https://www.evinrosecoaching.com/ • Alex’s Instagram: @inspirationalalex • Alex’s website: https://www.alexterranovacoaching.com/ Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn’t Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/ If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who believes in love showing up in the most unexpected ways!  

In this episode of Love Isn’t Enough with Joree Rose and Dr. John Schinnerer, we are joined by therapist, relationship expert, and author Elizabeth Earnshaw to discuss how stress impacts couples and what we can do about it. Elizabeth’s new book, Till Stress Do Us Part, explores how daily pressures—whether from work, parenting, finances, or other challenges—can erode connection and create conflict in relationships. We dive into:     The most common ways stress affects couples and why many don’t recognize it. How unspoken stress leads to resentment, miscommunication, and emotional distance. Practical tools for managing stress individually and as a couple. How to foster emotional safety and connection, even in challenging times. Key insights from Till Stress Do Us Part that can help transform your relationship. If you’ve ever felt like stress is pulling you and your partner apart, this conversation is for you. Tune in for valuable strategies to navigate life’s pressures while maintaining a strong, healthy relationship.   Elizabeth Earnshaw is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, Certified Gottman Therapist, Clinical Fellow of the AAMFT, and the author of I Want This To Work: An Inclusive Guide to Navigating the Most Difficult Relationship Issues We Face in The Modern Age" and Til Stress Do Us Part, How to Healh The #1 Issue in Our Relationships. Elizabeth founded the therapy practice A Better Life Therapy, LLC and shares relationship health content on Instagram as @lizlistens.    Connect with Joree & John: • Website: www.loveisntenough.net • Instagram: @loveisntenough33 • Subscribe to their podcast: Love Isn’t Enough • Join our relationship Master Class series: https://loveisntenough.net/masterclass/   Connect with Joree Rose: • Website: www.joreerose.com • Instagram: @joreerose • Subscribe to her podcast: Journey Forward with Joree Rose • Join the Podcast Membership: https://joreerose.com/journeyforwardpodcast/ Connect with Dr. John Schinnerer: • Website: www.guidetoself.com • Instagram: @theevolvedcaveman • Subscribe to his podcast: The Evolved Caveman If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who could benefit!