Your Kickstarter Sucks

We all crap and pee, sure. But what then? What then, I ask you?!?! Well there's an app for that, and oh yeah, the app is a bag. On today's show, Mike and JF are OFFICIALLY back on their bullshit, unless you don't like that kind of stuff, in which case it could not be any further from the truth. But! What they do have, whether you like it or not, is some ribald humor, informative discussion on various topics, and a friendship that will stand the test of time. Plus the crap and pee bags thing from the title of the episode. Check it out, gang, and if you don't love it, you can always listen to it anyway. Not everything is gonna be your favorite. Time to grow up! Want more YKS? Wow! Sorry to hear that? May I ask why not? Oh okay, yeah, I understand. Well, with all that being said, and by the way, I could not agree with you more, these guys are real scumbags. But with all that being said, they do offer weekly bonus episodes and more at the YKS Premium Patreon page. Obviously you won't be taking advantage of their awesome annual subscription discount, or seeing any video content or anything like that. But, as crazy as this sounds, thousands of people are enjoying this stuff every month, and it even makes for a great gift this holiday season. Yeah, really demented stuff. Sad, actually. But that's America for you. Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by BetterHelp. "I get by with a little help from my friends" - Unknown. Well my friends are all podcast guys so I actually just go to therapy instead. And therapy is one thing the folks at BetterHelp have a bunch of. Don't see any? Ask 'em about it, and they can check in the back to see if there's more in stock. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKSAlso sponsoring today's show: NordVPN. I tell you one way NordVPN has made my life a little better: sports! I'm sick of region-locked teams and blackouts, and NordVPN makes those a thing of the past. Like the dinosaurs! Thanks, NordVPN, for helping me blast some dinos. Unlock the world of entertainment for yourself with 73% off a 2 year deal plus one month for free at NordVPN.com/YKS.Finally, YKS is also brought to you by TrueBill. With some notable exceptions of course, our big old list of subscriptions can really get wet and wild sometimes. Truebill is all about giving that credit card a rest. Little massage, maybe some hot cocoa...dare I say a bubble bath? That's right folks, Truebill will sort through your subscriptions and help you drop the ones you don't want anymore or never needed in the first place, and they will also put your credit card in the bathtub. Try 'em out today at Truebill.com/YKS and save yourself an amount of money I can barely even quantify! Maybe like $60 or so? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Now how's this for a Monday afternoon treat -- the thing that I should have posted on Monday morning! Oh well, I guess our old friend Garfield really had it right! And that's all I want to say about him for now. On today's show, Mike and JF go wild and crazy on some bad inventions, and oh yeah, there are no holds barred either! Download this "shiznit" right now for our thoughts on an even weirder form of "minting coins", an upgrade to your Tesla experience (that isn't trading it in for a real car), and playing poo poo games with other adults. Pull your pants up, lock your band's 5 trombones in the van, and grab your phone...it's time for YKS! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt. Title for this episode from Poochie D: "Just have it be whatever the fuck Mike says at about 45:47" -- you got it, pooch! For more YKS, you GOTTA head on over to the YKS Premium Patreon page. What awaits you is pure physical pleasure, and -- oh geez, oh golly, I got my descriptions mixed up. Well basically we have a huge backlog of premium episodes -- movie commentaries, interviews with our friends, games, more Kickstarter stuff, ad-free episodes, a video feed, and more. It's pretty cheap, all things considered, and without you guys we wouldn't make the show anymore. So thanks for listening, and also it says here it'll make you nut off like a fire hose. Oh gosh dernit! Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by HelloFresh....or "presh" as Mike would say. Get a load of this guy, he's talking like he's got a mouthful of pumpkin! Luckily my several flubs were more easily edited out of this week's ad read. Anyhow, it's the famous season of Autumn and you know what that means...food!(?) If you want to try food out for yourself -- I've heard only good things -- head on over to hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 and use promo code yourkickstartersucks14 for 14 free meals and 3 free gifts. 17 free things total! That's a lot of things.This week's show is also brought to you by BetterHelp. "Welp...it's Betterhelp!" Get 10% off your first month of BetterHelp today at BetterHelp.com/YKS Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Scam alert! Scam alert! It's time for Mike and JF to don their investigative journalism hats and read the comments on a weird Kickstarter to see if someone else thinks its a scam or not. And maybe it's not, who knows. Not us, that's for sure. On today's episode we fix the entire movie industry, put fireworks likers in their place at long last, and destroy the entire oil industry. Not the really really bad one. Just the kinda bad one. So not really a huge win by us but it's only Monday so give us some time and we will deliver you another big W later in the week. All that, plus a Neighbor Insight, and much much more, only on Your Kickstarter Sucks (name in description for SEO purposes). Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.For more of this crazy nonsense we call YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon page, where 5 extra episodes a month, plus incredible video stylings from Producer Dan await the dedicated listener. Oh yeah and we just casually throw in ad-free eps, merch discounts, Discord access and more like we don't even care about it but we actually do. Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by BetterHelp. BetterHelp: why get worse help when you could get BetterHelp? That's just what I think and I barely know anything about anything. But I wrote it down on my hand here so I'd remember it when I typed this up. And the handwriting's clear enough so I'm saying it. Sick of the uncomfortable waiting rooms? BetterHelp was, too, that's why they invented staying at your house and getting professional therapy there, instead of in the waiting room. Try it today at Betterhelp.com/YKS for 10% off your first month and safely 6 feet away kiss the uncomfortable waiting room goodbye! Also sponsoring today's show: Honey! Oh baby I finally got some reinforcements for my battle against the fearsome promo code box at checkout. The battlefield is set (the computer). The weapons have been chosen (uh, maybe this one is the computer). Gird your loins and prepare for war...coupon codes on me!!! Download the free extension today at JoinHoney.com/YKS and start saving buttloads of cash...for the greater good! And use your computer to do it by the way. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if I told you...it was time to write the episode description, but you didn't want to? Would you shrink from the limelight and open another tab on the computer...or would you rise to the challenge, and write the best episode description of all time, a handful of paragraphs enshrined forever in the Episode Description Hall of Fame alongside the one that just says "Buh?" and the one with the copied synopsis from Avatar or whatever it was? Follow me down the rabbit hole and find out what your mind is truly made of...Today on the show we have a bunch of stupid projects to talk about and I think we do about 5 minutes on "poop worms". Enjoy. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Over on YKS Premium, Miketober continues...just kidding! Fuck that shit! We're sick of it! It's all over! We do have the official Squeeze Louise Halloween Mailbag dropping tomorrow, but after that it's smooth sailing with classic YKS Premium episode concepts such as....Oh Crap We Don't Have An Idea For This One, and Drink A Weird Soda for 25 Minutes. Come check out our new Set It and Forget Option: Set up your subscription and Forget your password: the only way to enjoy YKS!This week's show is sponsored by HelloFresh! There are so many awesome benefits to HelloFresh it would probably take me about 40 hours in a week to list them all. Here's one: you can finally get your meals organized! And that right there is important as heck. Inside these nice little boxes is everything you need for a quick, easy, and healthful meal...just the good stuff and none of the BS! Check it out today at hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 and use promo code YourKickstarterSucks14 for 14 free meals and free shipping! Damn!Also sponsoring today's episode: NordVPN. Hey what'd you get me for Cyber Month? A big honking SUV with a red bow on it in the driveway for some reason? Yuck! I'd rather have NordVPN...the fastest, securest, entertainment-unlockingest VPN this side of the Chattahoochee River....and that side, too! Make up for your whiff of a gift with NordVPN and the promo code YKS...that's gonna get ya 73% off and a free month to boot...yeah, Santa's boot that is! Kick! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Now Loading...funny ass episode description...10%...20%...25%. ERROR?: Loading not complete? Proceed anyway Y/N? YYYYYYYAlright folks it's another episode of YKS and if you're anything like me you have to be wondering...what could the next 90 or so minutes of my life be like? Let's scour the old notes here for some hints. Well it looks like we drove Goofy's Truck around for a spell and went to Knight School, then figured out what Linux distro Hunter Biden had on his laptop (think we got it wrong? drop us an email from your custom keyboard!) Plus we got a new type of alcohol that really promises to change the game, another product aiming to put the humble plunger out of a job, and what essentially adds up to a lasagna-covered pipe bomb. ERROR: Memory overload. Forgot what computers say when they're done doing computer stuff. Continue...? Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Miketober continues over at YKS Premium and this week we're doing Hellgate (1989) with the one and only Paul F. Tompkins! For perhaps our worst and least-available movie yet, we invited one of the nicest and funniest guys around to come deal with our shit for a while. Hellgate imagines a one horse town, left for dead, first figuratively, then literally, and well a bunch of stuff happens and a lady goes crazy kind of. I'm not actually sure what it is about because it is god awful but we'll all be talking about it together, this Friday, only on the YKS Premium Patreon! Today's show is sponsored by NordVPN. I am using NodVPN, as I sit here and type out this copy, to unlock the world of entertainment television from the comfort of my home office. Yes, it's true, even an entertainment maven such as myself has something to gain from teaming up with NordVPN, and you can too. Just go to NordVPN.com/YKS for a deal so absurd you'll barely believe it. 73% off and 4 months free. Good lord. Stop reading this and go be entertained!YKS is also brought to you by BetterHelp. Boy stuff sure is wild sometimes, huh? That's how I feel anyways. Well I'm not a doctor or even that smart of a guy so maybe I shouldn't say that. Stuff sure is, sometimes, huh? Actually I only did like 2 years of philosophy so maybe I shouldn't say that either. Point is, there's people out there who actually can tell you whether stuff is, or is wild, and if you ask me it's nice to talk to 'em. If you want a professional, open-minded, and most of all, CLASSY therapist, head on over to BetterHelp.com/YKS for 10% off your first month. The therapy is still 100% good though so don't worry about that. They're still gonna try. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In a world...where a man needed every email he'd ever sent, and his friends thought he was crazy...a hero emerged...and it was the man, from before. The one with the emails...Coming soon to whatever the funniest streaming service to say would be...it's The Email Genius. On today's show, we're talking about why I'm so great, how I'm great, why I'm the best, etc. Plus Mike goes Poop Cop Mode and we listen to some Chap Hop! Oh and the projects are like, a porno guy and a shoe and a towel. Not that great but that's why we did all the other stuff. We knew it sucked! That's why we were funny this time!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Miketober continues over at YKS Premium and this week we're doing The Stuff (1985)! A mysterious new treat is sweeping the nation, and its most devoted fans find that they just can't eating it...and they don't want anything else. Who better to discuss the horror of junk food consumption than our friends The Doughboys! That's right, Nick Wiger and Mike Mitchell join us this Friday for The Stuff, only on YKS Premium!YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. Hate not getting 20% off plus free shipping on your order of men's top grooming essentials? Yeah, we did too. That's why we hacked into the Manscaped Mainframe (Manframe) and deployed our own Manscaped Malicious (Manlicious) code...it was all for you! Mike was the guy doing backflips in the server room, while I sat down the block in a very normal looking work van filled to the brim with computers and wires and stuff. Everything went great (well, Mike broke his neck doing a cartwheel off a networking rack) and now the discount is yours: 20% off and free shipping at Manscaped with the code YKS20! Do it for Mikey!Also sponsoring this week's episode is HelloFresh. Ding-dong! It's time to get organized! Just to get you started, how about a big box full of classic autumn vegetables, such as...pumpkin, maybe? And crust? Pumpkin and crust...now there's a perfect union! Hell, they've got my vote! Anyway to tell you the truth I didn't get a pumpkin. I got normal stuff like, fish and whatnot, which was also good. But maybe you'll get a pumpkin. At any rate, what I do is basically take the stuff out of the box and cook it. What you do with it after that is up to you but I suggest eating the food. I'll leave the rest to your imagination...Try it for yourself today at HelloFresh.com/YKS14 and you're gonna wanna use that promo code as well, YKS14 for 14 free meals and free shipping! Wow-ee I can't wait to eat my pumpkin! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

e.g., On this award-winning show, we dive deep into the psyches of the world's cereal killers. Does Snap make Crackle Pop? And is Tony really that grrreat after all? All this, and more, from Cereal <--- That's the suggested text for the description box of this episode, so now you can make an informed decision as to whether my descriptions are good or not. I don't have an opinion either way. I'm just sitting here doing my thing. On today's show, we've got not one but TWO top tens for a total of top twenty, a 21 beep salute for our fallen smoke alarms, and also something called Trevr Huntr, I think. Plus, Mike fucks me over on the 6-pack once again. All this, and more, from Cereal. Just kidding.Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Want more YKS? Oh golly! We're plum fresh out. NOT. Check out YKS Premium Presents: Miketober, our exclusive monthlong series over at Patreon. This week's episode: our friend Katherine Krueger of Elle and Discourse joins us for Slumber Party Massacre (1982)! Yaaay! I'm doing the Kermit waving his arms around thing! This week's YKS is sponsored by Honey. Now this here is a little guy that lives in your web browser and wants to save you money. Best of all, he's stupid as hell so he can't send out any of your info to the bad guys. He just plum forgets it! But we still love him. Hell, he saved me some dollars on a hat which I will wear every day. Thanks, Honey. Check him out at JoinHoney.com/YKS!!Also sponsoring today's show is BetterHelp. Nothing puts a smile on my face like knowing I'll never suffer an uncomfortable waiting room ever again. From now on, I'm sitting at home, where I like being! Get yourself that same feeling of pure bliss, and also some other good stuff for mental health as well, by going to BetterHelp.com/YKS for 10% off your first month of no waiting rooms and professional counseling, from BetterHelp! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Monday morning...Guess it's time to pour a cup of java, head to "my office" to drop some stink off, and tune in to the best podcast known to man. And after I'm done with whatever that is, I'll be listening to YKS, the show for which these next few paragraphs should serve as the description!On today's show we're talking about the wild world of wrasslin' (with apologies to all our friends who love it), possibly renaming Green Knight to reflect how nothing happens in it (Stink Night?), and an Mike's intense love affair with the scroll wheel. Plus, we're blowing away the poopoos with compressed air, sleeping at the hospital in a pine box, and narrating a dog jumping on a fence to millions of adoring fans. It's just THAT kinda day on YKS, folks, and if you don't think that's miracle shit, then it's not for you and very little is!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Want more YKS? And would rather it be about horror movies than Kickstarters, feature good segments instead of bad ones, and have incredible guests instead of none at all? Kind of makes you think that should be the show all the time, huh? Nope! It's just one month and it's only on YKS Premium Presents: Miketober! This week's episode: Nic Newsham of Gatsby's American Dream joins us for Halloween III: Season of the Witch! No tricks, all treats baby!This week's episode is brought to you by HelloFresh! Ohhhh Hello Fresh! They're the number one meal delivery service in America for a reason...and the reason, you have to assume, is their excellent working relationship with the Your Kickstarter Sucks podcast. In fact, things have been going SO well between us that they gave us the all clear to hook our listeners up with a deal of dare I say epic proportions? Or portions, perhaps! That's right, heading over to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 and using the promo code yourkickstartersucks14 is gonna get ya 14 free meals plus free shipping. Now That's Fresh! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey everyone well it's a new episode of YKS! Writing these things is fuckin' torture but we're gonna grit our teeth and get through it, okay? Just a couple more sentences. I already did the other parts and this is the last thing I'm doing before I get some lunch. I left my notes downstairs so I'm going to try to remember what we talked about instead. Ok I think there's a social media website on here for sure. And I remember the kids who were trying to do a guitar solo or something. That was pretty funny. Wow we're almost done. Okay, plus! A very frightening update on the pussy steamer from 2019. And we're done. I hope everyone enjoyed that because it took me down to like 2 hp and I need a bunch of beef jerky now. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Want more YKS? Well, I reckon the place to get it is the YKS Premium Patreon. And now is a great time to jump in, gang, because October is Miketober all month long! Join us and some very special guests as we comb through Mike's catalog of scary movies (and the Wolfman's hair! Yuck!). It's gonna be a real scream! This week on YKS Premium: the one and only Howell Dawdy returns to discuss Berserker (1987)! And coming up right before that, a Squeeze Louise mailbag! Hell of a week to join YKS Premium. Hell of a week.Today's show is brought to you by...Gumball! Zuhh??? Who sponsors the sponsors? That's right gang, Gumball.FM is a great place to look at, buy, or sell ads, or think about them or whatever you want. I personally like to go on there to see what ads I'm reading this week. But if I were a product or service, I might want to buy an ad...on this podcast even! Check em out over there, and check us out too. And don't forget to enjoy products and/or services, alright?!Also sponsoring today's show? BetterHelp! Oh, it's BetterHelp! Now here's the place to go for professional, convenient, and affordable counseling. It's basically counseling, except they put their own special twist of being professional, convenient, and affordable on it. Other therapists sitting there going, "D'oh! Why didn't I think of that?!" Well, too late! BetterHelp beat ya to the punch. Try 'em out today at BetterHelp.com/yks and get 10% off your first month. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Sorry antivaxxers!!! It's time to listen to an episode of YKS: another Wowmazing! show from Dingo Products. On today's show, we're talking about how damn FINE I look in black jeans, plus a bunch of other crap who cares. These jeans, though, wow! They really hug all my curves, and are buttery soft. I've been turning them inside out in the wash so they don't bleed even though honestly that doesn't make much sense to me. They get wet either way, right? If the inside of the clothes don't get wet in the washer, what the hell am I even doing? Makes no sense. But that's what it says on the tag there. Man that's sad about Norm MacDonald, huh? Okay enjoy the show. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.Need more YKS so much you can't stand it? The place to go is YKS Premium -- now with video! We have a great slate of episodes planned for Miketober but you might as well get in now as we smash the 2 or 3 remaining brain cells we have together in a vain attempt to come up with some good shit before then. It might work!This week's YKS is sponsored by Manscaped -- now folks, I've talked a lot of shit in my day but here's the real scoop: Manscaped makes some good ass products! You can catch me with the Lawnmower 4.0, shears (nails, eyebrow, etc), and cologne. And the crop gel is, hand to god, the best shave gel I've ever used. It's sooooooooo slick. Damn! If you want to try any of this stuff for yourself, first of all I don't blame ya one bit. Secondly, it would be a big help to me personally if you'd use the promo code YKS20 at checkout. Oh shit, and it actually helps you out, too? Because you get 20% off and free shipping? Wow. I guess I don't see why you wouldn't do it then! Unless you're a bad person....??? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.