RecoverU | Betrayal Trauma, Sex Addiction Support, Betrayal Recovery, Reconciliation, Porn Addiction Recovery

Content Warning: Today's episode is discussing some of traumatic events that have happened in our society lately and that are all over the news leading to a heavier episode. Please be aware of where you are in your recovery if this episode is appropriate for you.   Things we discuss: The impact of national violence and how it impacts us individually  How societal change starts individually  The importance of connection and community for mental health, grieving and healing Our personal faith and how it impacts our views on how we love others Kylene's health scares and how they impact her view of the world and her life   While this episode is heavier than most, we hope it also helps you feel seen, encouraged, and loved.

Life and recovery are rarely simple. Sometimes, unique dynamics add even more layers to an already complex journey. In this episode, Kylene and Patrick explore three challenging scenarios that can complicate the recovery process:   What if the betrayed partner has also struggled with addiction but in another form? What if the betrayed partner has also had an affair in the past?  What if the betrayed partner has looked at porn?    Together, they unpack why personal responsibility matters, how choosing individual health impacts the relationship, and the importance of showing empathy for the pain we may have caused—whether intentional or not—even when we’ve been hurt ourselves. These are tough conversations, and one episode can’t cover every nuance. We encourage you to seek guidance from trusted professionals who can support you in your unique situation.   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune

As much as we wish it were, healing isn't always linear. There are ups and downs, and moments where we are living happily in the present and are reminded of the past.    In today's episode Kylene and Patrick share about grief, how confusing it can feel for the betrayed partner, and how important it is to recognize that healing doesn't mean we forget what happened.   It's normal for thoughts, emotions or memories to come up years later, and it's important to create safety with each other in order to have connecting conversations together.     If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune

Boundaries aren't just helpful for the hurt spouse, they are crucial for the recovering spouse as well. They can create structure, offer safety and give the betrayed partner the information they need in order to make decisions about the future of the relationship.   There are many individuals that struggle with the idea of boundaries. In today's episode, we offer some reframes around what boundaries mean and how to think about them in order to feel confident using your voice.   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune

In this episode, Kylene and Patrick explore the difference between compliance—“just checking the boxes”, and true proactivity, where personal responsibility becomes the driving force of recovery. They share why compliance alone can feel hollow, often leaving betrayed partners frustrated as they wait for their spouse to engage in recovery with equal energy and commitment. Together, they unpack why consistency matters, and how the power of repetition creates the foundation for lasting, meaningful healing.   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune

In today’s episode, Kylene and Patrick discuss healthy sexuality after betrayal, addiction and infidelity.  What is healthy sexuality? Why is consent so important and what does that look like?    They share thoughts on what plays into our beliefs around sexuality and their own personal experiences around healing.   They mention the Raabsmiths book: “Building True Intimacy” which you can see here: https://raabsmithteam.com   Kylene and Patrick share more on reconnecting sexually after betray in these previous episodes as well: Sex Through Recovery - Year 1 - Ep 54: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000649141817   Establishing True Intimacy - Ep 55: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000649843594   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune

In today’s brief episode, Kylene and Patrick continue the conversation from last time, where they explored the difference between finding someone attractive and feeling sexual arousal in recovery. This time, they share key resources that have influenced their understanding of healthy sexuality and reinforce the empowering truth that we can take ownership of our thoughts, behaviors, and responses. With this mindset, recovery becomes a pathway to navigating the world with greater confidence, clarity, and self-control.   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune

In today's episode Kylene and Patrick answer a question about a recovering addict being attracted to women in yoga pants. When is noticing someone is attractive a threat to the betrayed partner or to their own sobriety/recovery?   They discuss objectification vs humanizing and how seeing someone as a whole human being makes a difference. They share how being able to walk in the world feeling free no matter what you see or are exposed to, is the goal - and an attainable one- through recovery.   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune  

In this short episode. Patrick reflects on his divorce, and parenting through that time. He shares his perspective and lived experience of divorce after infidelity, and starting over with almost nothing while also realizing that it was the healthiest choice in his particular circumstances.   If you would like to listen to the previous episode that we refer to around children and divorce you can go to episode #123 or click here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000717502361   If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune

In this episode, Kylene and Patrick explore five essential things a betrayed partner needs from their spouse in order to truly heal. They unpack each element with depth and honesty, including: Taking full responsibility without minimizing or making excuses Creating safety—especially by addressing power dynamics and physical presence Making her feel seen, chosen, and prioritized Recovering for yourself, not just to save the relationship Demonstrating long-term consistency and follow-through Patrick shares personal insights and real-life experiences as they walk through each step. Together, they explain why these actions are not just helpful—but crucial— after betrayal. If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql   Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8    Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2    For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org Follow Kylene: On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune  On IG: @KyleneTerhune