Relationship Coaching School Podcast

In this episode I give you 3 steps toward a more peaceful relationship. And, when I talk about peace in a relationship, it isn’t the BS fantasy most people think of. Check it out. SHOWNOTES Why everyone is dumb in some area of our lives. [4:00] How can we just “all get a long”?  [5:01] Your two choices when uncomfortable stuff comes up? [10:24] The number one reason people get a divorce [13:37] Powerful 3-step process to resolve dumb fights [16:00]

In this episode I talk with Alison Armstrong about some major differences between men and women and how to use them to your advantage in your relationship. While I get that the labels of masculine and feminine or man/woman can be incredibly narrow, they are very effective for teaching basic relationship principles. Notice how Alison does this with some age old “labels” to help you see where you naturally  orient and where your partner does. Also, notice when and where you feel you are at your “best” in your relationship. Check it! SHOWNOTES What caused Alison to become hungry to learn about men? [5:30] Why do woman throw their husbands under the bus? [9:50] The metaphor that helps explain why men and women see each other so differently. [12:05] What one factor determines when a man or woman will act at his or her best. [16:30] The best time to talk about a challenge in your relationship. [17:45] How being more accurate about time can help women connect better with their man. [24:05] The ideal perspective to thrive in changing life circumstances. [26:15] The missing piece that women don’t get about a partner who is on his purpose. [32:45] What is a “no-blow” date. [35:00]

In this episode I answer listeners’ questions on long-distance relationships, how to win him back, entitlement and sex, blended families, divorce, and much more. It’s a shorty but a goodie. SHOWNOTES What does an over-supportive relationship look like? [2:30] What does it mean when a man says he “needs a break” from the relationship? [4:15] How to win back a guy? [6:14] What’s the best way to break through your triggers? [7:43] How to make a 2nd or 3rd marriage work out? [9:07] What to do when your partner only feels criticized? [11:33] How to deal with a man who feels sexually entitled? [13:20] What is the viability of long-distance relationships? [15:28] Jayson’s one-question challenge to listeners [18:17]

In this juicy episode I talk with Alex Allman about men, orgasms and sex. Giving her an orgasm isn’t what you think. Alex helps us get more honest and more present with our sex lives and how crucial it is to have other men in your life to bust your balls when you need it. While this episode is for the men, if you are a woman, I know you’ll appreciate how our guest is trying to help the men dance with you in the bedroom. SHOWNOTES How Alex’s childhood impacted his view of masculinity [5:50] The two types of change [11:10] Why being beautiful and successful early on makes change harder [12:45] What happened when Alex was 39 that forever woke him up. [17:55] Why only loving your partner for their positive traits will make you disappointed. [23:30] The most important thing for a man to get that is so simple yet so complicated. [32:15] How the “doting husband” can be sexually repulsive. [34:15] What to do when you have erection troubles in the bedroom. [43:00]

Love. This word is one of the most commonly misunderstood words in the English language. In this podcast I give my definition of what true love really is. Here I cover the 3 stages of love in a relationship. Before age 30, I never got past stage 1. I think by looking at your own experience you too, will see that it’s time to update your definition of love.  SHOWNOTES The difference between love and infatuation. [3:30] The truth about love songs on the radio. [5:45] What are the three stages of love? [6:37] The huge gifts and power in a long-term relationship. [10:50] Two action steps to get started today [12:40]  

Here I cover 2 types of boundaries. Both are important to learn and practice on a regular basis in your relationship. I also build upon last week’s episode (with Lisa Dion jaysongaddis.com/podcast40). Boundaries separate the classic co-dependent couple from the the smart couple and believe it or not, generate a more fulfilling type of closeness. SHOWNOTES The childhood dynamic that affects our relationships today. [3:27] One powerful reality-check question to ask yourself. [5:34] An example of when betraying yourself hurts both you and the relationship. [7:45] The two types of boundaries [11:05] How boundaries help weed out people in your life that aren’t a fit for the real you. [12:30]

Boundaries are by far one of the most important tools in intimate relationships. How much do you struggle to say no says a lot about how much you value yourself. You must get boundaries if you want to go the distance in a relationship. SHOWNOTES The huge breakthrough insight about boundaries that Lisa shared with Jayson [5:13] The four things our brain is always scanning for to determine there is a threat or challenge [7:24] What is Lisa’s definition of a boundary? [13:20] Jayson and Lisa demonstrate how to set a boundary [16:33] The big fear we all carry in ourselves [20:05] The weakness many of us have in receiving a boundary request [22:02] What are the most common feedback signs our body tells us? [25:50] The three types of boundaries [30:56] Jayson issues a boundary challenge [43:04]

Is love earned or given to you? In this podcast, I explore what happens when people say “Can’t you just love me as I am?” and then hope for a great relationship. And I also talk about the best practice to do every day if you want a thriving relationship that works, not just one you stumble through.  

In this podcast, I interview Decker Cunov, a leader who has deeply impacted how I show up personally and professionally. For over 10 years, he's been one of the pioneers in a fast-growing transformational practice known as "Circling." As usual Decker packs a punch in his own funky style. Pay special attention to our dynamic near the end. SHOWNOTES Why does Decker care about relationships so much? [4:17] What was it like growing up as a sensitive kid. [7:15] What IS “circling”? [11:36] How circling is and isn’t like meditation. [15:05] Why does circling matter in relationships. [15:58] A quick way to play “intersubjective tennis” with your partner. [31:34] Decker breaks down the steps of circling. [23:35] What’s it like to “feel another person” in circling. [29:32] Some of the traps of circling. [33:15] Decker starts circling Jayson [43:36] Jayson’s big aha from circling [50:10] What Decker’s son said that blew him away [52:33] The one thing that Decker said that personally impacted Jayson [57:01]

In this podcast, I interview Satyen and Suzanne, both long-time students of David Deida. These two are super honest, loving individuals, and wow have they been through a lot! There share some very vulnerable details about how they navigated religion, affairs, and fighting. They give you concrete practical tools you can try right now with your partner. These guys live it! SHOWNOTES How did Satyen and Suzanne start caring about relationships? [3:07] Why did Satyen resist marriage? [5:40] What ingredient was the “it” factor for Suzanne’s attraction to Satyen? [6:24] What role did religion play in their relationship? [9:22] How did fighting about food bring them closer? [10:56] What impact did David Deida have on their connection? [13:08] How did they create a new template for their relationship? [14:46] The most challenging period of their relationship [16:42] One really important practice to heal from infidelity [19:54] Satyen and Suzanne demonstrate a powerful tool to express emotional pain to your partner [22:28] The often-missed key to understanding your partner [28:43] What is PCP and ISE and how do they create connection and turn-on? [30:50]