Embracing Intensity

I've observed a lot of themes around integration and disintegration recently so I thought it would be a good time to do a quick overview of Kazmier's Dabrowski's theory of Positive Disintegration. You can find a more comprehensive overview on ep. 154: On Positive Disintegration with Chris Wells, and my Blog Post “Finding Treasure in Ruins.” Dabrowski believes that intensity/excitability is a sign of high developmental potential, and neuroses, which we might call neurodiversity, anxiety, existential depression etc., can be positive if they move us towards our higher selves.  In this episode: 3 factors of positive development Dynamisms are the inner and outer forces that drive our actions.   5 types of integration and disintegration Resources on integration 5 Types of overexcitability Thoughts on Integration Over identification and/or rejection of certain parts of our identity What is Dabrowski's Sweater? Getting your conflicting parts to communicate with each other.

Today’s show focuses on strategies for success. My guest combines her late-in-life diagnoses, training, and experience to help clients accomplish their goals. Maaya Hitomi is an ADHD coach and academic strategist who supports ADHD, autistic, and otherwise neurodivergent clients to build strategies for better coping. At Structured Success, Maaya’s own coaching and consultation practice, she builds upon her Master’s training in psychology, her experience as a coach, and her lived experience as a neurodivergent person. Being ADHD, autistic, and dyslexic herself, Maaya credits her academic and professional success to the coping strategies she learned along the way. Focused on collaboratively building individualized coping strategies to support her clients, Maaya helps them make the healthiest thing the easiest thing. Show Highlights: Why Maaya is intensely passionate about giving people tools to understand how their minds work as she teaches coping strategies and learns alongside them How her mom didn’t acknowledge Maaya’s ADHD early on, and her official ADHD, autism, and dyslexia diagnoses didn’t come until her university years In school, Maaya was always seeking to learn more and caused problems because of being bullied and feeling socially awkward Cultural factors that affected Maaya include her privileged upbringing in the suburbs and gifted programs at school Why Maaya’s intensity is less of a problem now because it’s been identified and accepted How Maaya was always “too everything” in elementary school, so she put her head down and spent some lonely years in high school, which was the worst thing she could have done How Maaya’s intensity got out of control when she stood up to a bully and was overwhelmed into shutdown mode--an act that had far-reaching effects How Maaya uses her fire for good by using her personal acceptance and sharing her knowledge and experience with her clients How Maaya has collected “nuggets of truth” along the way and developed coping strategies that she can share with clients How Maaya helps others use their fire by bringing strategies and options to them with which to fashion a workable system Resources: Connect with Maaya:  Structured Success Find Maaya on Twitter: @structuredsucc Find Maaya on TikTok and Instagram  

I’m super thrilled to share the recording of Nneka Coxeff’s talk on Writing to Heal from this month’s guest community call! You can find the full discussion in the Embracing Intensity Community! The wRITE to Heal Project was developed by founder and editor-in-chief of BLP magazine, Nneka D. Coxeff. As a Master Life Coach and Empowerment Practitioner, she offers transformative writing classes, workshops and wellness retreats to gently guide clients through the raw emotions of grief caused by loss, tragedy and transition. About Nneka: Nneka D. Coxeff is the founder and Editor-in-Chief of Black Lace + Pearls magazine, a creative and healing arts publication devoted to empowering women around the globe to live out their divine purpose. A by-product of BLP magazine is her wRITE to Heal Project where she hosts writing workshops and wellness retreats in order to guide guests through the emotions of grief caused by death, tragedy and trauma.  Through writing prompts, exercises and discussion, she assists guests in breaking free from the torture caused by unanswered questions and the sin of blame. She encourages them to sit with the pain and to own all their emotions in order to move through them and acquire some clarity and guidance. Nneka understands that relationships can be devastating to the soul when abruptly interrupted. However, she believes that it is our relationship with Self that needs to be strengthened in order to understand and to move forward. As a consultant, she helps her clients put voice to their truths, experiences and life lessons learned along the way in order to help them heal and to inspire others as well. Everyone has a story to tell and it is Nneka's mission to help individuals value their journey, own their truth and stake claim to a more enlightened tomorrow. Writing has been a tool of healing throughout her journey and it is through this artful gift that she assists others along their path of ascension. You can find out more about Nneka and her wRITE to Heal Project at: blacklaceandpearls.com/write-to-heal.html This is a part of our 2021 Embracing Intensity Community Speaker Series. You can find the full discussion recording in the Embracing Intensity Community. You can support this work by joining the community, or supporting us on Patreon!  Links: Embracing Intensity Community Write to Heal Project web page Follow Nneka! Facebook Twitter Instagram Support the wRITE to Heal Project on Patreon! Link Coming Soon!

Have you ever felt like you were taking up too much space? My guest today shares how he moved from talking up space wherever he went to channeling his own unique powers to bring out the best in others. Join us! Landon Young is someone I met on TikTok, which is unique as a social media platform that allows people to connect across social groups that might not normally interact. Landon describes himself as a “regular guy” who enjoys what he does as a North American Digital Brand Manager at Nike. Show Highlights: Why Landon is intensely passionate about sneakers, storytelling, his dream job at Nike, playing guitar, and spending time with his wife and daughter How Landon’s personal brand of intensity includes empathy and passion as someone who is relentless and focused on the process Growing up, Landon was always labeled as gifted and was supported by his parents How Landon overcompensated for his issues with giftedness before medication helped him find balance How cultural factors affected Landon as he grew up in a Mormon home; He had a strong desire to excel but didn’t know how to process and regulate emotions How Landon finds joy in discovering connections with others How Landon has to tone himself down frequently--something he didn’t know how to do when he was younger: “I took up too much space and didn’t know how to channel my superpowers.” How Landon learned to recognize the moments when he tends to get out of control How Landon uses his fire for good as an “energy giver,” which he feels is his calling in life How Landon loves helping others at Nike as he teaches retail employees about new products and innovations and creates campaigns for product launches Habits that help Landon harness the power of his intensity include meditation, lots of water, and healthy supplements How Landon benefitted from the book, Essentialism by Greg McKeown How Landon helps others with true leadership, which is recognizing their potential, tapping into it, and finding what they are good at Landon’s parting advice: “Learn to acknowledge and leverage your ADHD in ways that build up your life with a superpower for balance and happiness.” Where to Find Landon:  Instagram: @HeyitsLando  Tik-Tok - @heyitslando90  

This week is a bit late and short again, but it's for a great reason! I hyper focused on a project the last two days that's ready to share as a collaborative effort! The 2E Hub! A place for gifted, creative and twice exceptional folks to share, learn and explore! Links: 2E Hub Free Workbook on Harnessing the Power of Your Intensity  

My guest today shares the keen awareness he’s developed of his ADHD diagnosis and how it impacts his life. Join us to hear the story of the good he’s doing in the world. Ross Watt hosts the International ADHD Party on Twitter and is one of the ADHD-Hub co-creators. He’s working hard to make a difference for kids and adults with ADHD. Show Highlights: Why Ross is intensely passionate about ADHD, writing poems, and encouraging others How Ross’ personal brand of intensity means being hyper-focused with a chip on his shoulder and always investigating things in deeper ways How Ross grew up being strong-willed, determined (especially when told he couldn’t do something), opinionated, and argumentative How Ross’ parents nicknamed him “Half-a-job,” which was a dig that led him to compare himself to others and find that he didn’t measure up How Ross’ adolescent years were a big contradiction How Ross has had to tone himself down and tune himself out when he knows he shouldn’t say something but feels like he will explode How Ross has had to learn when to speak up and when to be quiet How Ross’ intensity got out of control when he left his parents’ house at age 16, determined to prove everybody wrong How Ross uses his fire for good, helping others with diplomacy and patience How Ross helps others develop their ideas and disprove their opinions of themselves How Ross formed the habit of not telling others what he will do--just in case he doesn’t follow through Why Ross is very set in daily routines How Ross helps others by being honest and giving them belief in themselves How to figure out if you’re a “carrot” or “stick” person Resources: Connect with Ross: Twitter: ADHD ADHD-Hub   

This week I get to share the talk from our March guest call is on Honoring Your Sensitivity with Leah Walsh. You can find the full discussion and video in the Embracing Intensity Community! In Sanskrit there are 96 words for love. I seriously wish we had that many words in English for the word sensitivity! A word whose origins mean "capable of feeling and sensation," what does being sensitive mean in today's culture? Join us for this creative exploration of sensitivity, how sensitivity is a shared trait across neurodivergent experiences, and how curiosity and community can help in honoring your own sensitivity. About Leah: Leah Walsh (she/her) is motivated by one desire: to support conscious and creative people to uncover their unique potential and bring that light into the world. Leah sees every human as a beautiful and unique flower in life’s garden, but being your own flower can be hard work! It means cultivating a strong mind, deep roots, and a clear heart to allow your flower to grow, adapt, & bloom. Leah’s work as a Life Coach supports people to do just this. Her signature coaching programs support highly sensitive, neurodivergent, and introverted leaders to ground their confidence, cultivate deep-rooted belonging and awaken their unique impact. To learn more about Leah’s work, visit leahkwalsh.com Links: Embracing Intensity Community Free Workbook on Harnessing the Power of Your Intensity Leah's Website Future Embracing Intensity Events

Today’s show focuses on support for highly sensitive and introverted leaders. Join us to learn more! Leah Walsh is a speaker and life coach who is motivated by the desire to support conscious and creative people in uncovering their potential and bringing their light into the world. Leah sees every human as a beautiful and unique flower in life’s garden, but she knows that being your own flower can be hard work. It means cultivating a strong mind, deep roots, and a clear heart to allow your flower to grow, adapt, and bloom. Leah’s work as a life coach supports people in these ways. Her signature coaching programs support highly sensitive, neuro-divergent, and introverted leaders to ground their confidence, cultivate deep-rooted belonging, and awaken their unique impact. Show Highlights: Why Leah is intensely passionate about staying grounded, exploring belonging, and speaking truth with honesty and love How Leah grew up in a very neurodivergent family where her parents were supportive of the differences in the way their kids were wired How the culture of service in Leah’s family gave her a profound capacity to feel empathy for others and have a strong bond and connection to the land where she lives How Leah feels and connects through relationships How Leah had to tone herself down when she didn’t have the language to describe what she was going through Why she found ways to give herself permission to be real and authentic How journaling helps Leah identify what she is feeling Why it’s important to tune into your body How Leah uses her fire for good in her life coaching practice Why self-compassion is essential in Leah’s practice as a life coach How Leah works as a “shame extractor” How Leah helps others use their own fire by using the acronym DOES How COVID has cracked open new possibilities How Leah resonates with neurodiversity and how we embrace our beauty and intensity Resources: Leah K. Walsh  Visit Leah’s website for more information on her seasonal meetup, The Brave Intender Club.  

This week's episode is a fairly quick one as I got inspired for a new project this week and went down a hyper focus rabbit hole for days!  In this episode: Update on my latest project & upcoming course. Do it yourself mentality.  Being a maker, not a marketer. Links: Free Harness Your Power Workbook Adult Learning Assessment Embracing Intensity Community Community Events Calendar

Today’s guest launched into the world of twice-exceptionality because of the unique strengths and challenges that came with parenting her two sons, now teenagers. Her work now meets the needs of kids like her sons, along with helping other parents and educators through her therapy practice, support groups, and parenting programs. Join us to learn more! Debbie Steinberg Kuntz is the founder of the Bright & Quirky Summit, which features fantastic guest speakers and leading experts on “everything twice-exceptional” for parents and educators. Debbie is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who specializes in twice-exceptional (2E) kids and families.  Her annual Bright & Quirky Child Online Summit attracts over 15,000 people from 95 countries, and the 2021 version is coming up in just a few days. It’s a free resource, and you can sign up now by using the link in our Resources section below. Show Highlights: Why Debbie is intensely passionate about unlocking the world of twice-exceptionality Why Debbie’s relationship with intensity borders on workaholism and being “tenacious to the point of imbalance” How intensity affected her family as she grew up, and why she readily recognizes the strengths and challenges of twice-exceptionality in parenting her two children As a parent, Debbie looks for teachers who have raised boys before How Debbie wants to empower parents in the way they view their child against our cookie-cutter educational system How Debbie learned to embrace uniquely wired people as a Jew growing up in America How parents can talk to their kids about being 2E What Debbie has discovered about the line between asynchronous development and twice-exceptionality Why Debbie is a huge fan of neuropsychological assessments Her advice for parents about finding professional help How Debbie harnesses the power of her intensity through the polyvagal theory and asks, “Why?” and “Why now?” Debbie’s best advice about parenting comes from Kristin Neff, who says, “Talk to yourself like you would talk to a best friend.” How Debbie helps others use their fire by teaching them to pursue the intersection of what they are good at and what they enjoy The Bright & Quirky Summit 2021, coming in a few days; it features 29 experts tackling the timely theme of “Taming the Overwhelm” Resources: Debbie’s website:  Bright And Quirky  Sign up for the March 8-12, 2021 summit Find out about last year’s summit:  Bright And Quirky