Embracing Intensity

The podcast is marking a huge milestone this week as we celebrate our 5th anniversary! In today’s show, we go outside the box as we discuss the importance of storytelling when it comes to giftedness, equity, identity, and inclusion. Join us to learn more! Marc Smolowitz is a previous guest on the show, and I’m thrilled to have him back to talk about one of his projects, The G Word film. Marc is a multi-award-winning director, producer, and executive producer who has been involved in more than 50 independent films. His works have touched viewers on five continents and screened at the world’s top-tier film festivals. Marc is currently in post-production on The G Word, a feature-length documentary that aims to be the most comprehensive film ever made on the topics of gifted, talented, and neurodiverse education across the US. The film tells seven stories with different perspectives and asks the urgent equity question, “In the 21st century, who gets to be gifted in America, and why?” The film is poised to premiere in 2022. Show Highlights: How the pandemic has affected Marc’s work on The G Word and other projects A broad overview of The G Word and the important stories highlighted by the film How changemakers are working to make a difference in the gifted and talented community How we can use our voices to be allies for the disenfranchised How a zip code can be ultra-defining in the resources and opportunities available to people How Marc is working to “take the temperature” of people around the country in assessing how giftedness has been affected by the pandemic A look at the spirit of G/T/N Awareness Week (gifted, talented, neurodiverse), which is scheduled for October 25-29; this is a FREE five-day slate of virtual programming with a different focus each day. (See Resources to register.) Why free and appropriate public education is a social contract--a promise made to all parents for their children Why we as advocates and allies cannot quit fighting to make a better civil society for “more of us rather than less of us” Why we need a much more communal and collective narrative around giftedness and neurodiversity in our country Why The G Word is a mainstream educational film Resources: The G Word Film  Find out more about the film, find resources, and sign up for G/T/N Awareness Week. Find the film on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

I’m excited to introduce you to today’s guest. She’s a highly esteemed expert in the area of neuroscience and twice-exceptionality. Join us to learn more! Dr. Nicole Tetreault is a compassionate author, meditation teacher, and international speaker on neurodiversity, neurodevelopment, creativity, mental health, and wellness. Her book, Insight into a Bright Mind, explores groundbreaking research examining the experiences of unique, creative, and intense brains while advocating for new directions of human diversity and neurodiversity. Nicole is the founder of Awesome Neuroscience and translates the most promising neuroscience and positive psychology for people to live their best life. She is on the faculty at Bridges Graduate School of Cognitive Diversity and Education, and she leads a new generation of meditation practices by fusing novel discoveries in neuroscience with the ancient art of meditation. As the recipient of the Milton Career Exploration Prize from CalTech, she founded the novel nonprofit, Beyond the Cell, a transformative program to rehabilitate incarcerated women through guided meditation, neuroscience, literature, and expressive writing. Nicole believes we have the ability to wire our minds for positive plasticity through compassion and wisdom to live the life we dream. Show Highlights: Why Nicole is intensely passionate about neuroscience, positive psychology, and understanding diversity with compassion How Nicole knew from a very young age that she was different than others and greatly affected by social injustices How Nicole struggled when her intelligence didn’t match up for her in the classroom How Nicole spent her adult years rewiring her brain with new patterns, thoughts, stories, and ideas What Nicole would tell her former teachers about how they were “missing” each other How Nicole experienced stereotyping and white privilege growing up as a blond Caucasian girl in a private school in a part of Los Angeles with a large Latino and Chinese population How Nicole had to tone herself down in phases in her life, mostly by learning to hide in middle school and again in grad school How Nicole’s intensity got out of control in grad school when she felt pressure and anxiety to be perfect Nicole’s transformational meditation practice to regulate her intensity and emotional intelligence The challenge in balancing a good mindfulness practice with what goes on in today’s world Nicole’s take on spiritual bypassing and toxic positivity How Nicole uses her fire for good in connecting and partnering with others who are passionate about equality for neurodiverse people Nicole’s habits that help harness the power of her intensity: giving herself breaks for investigation, creativity, and curiosity; meditation; writing every day in a journal; and partnering with other creatives in the community How Nicole helps others use their fire by helping students see their magic and helping other people see their individual gifts How Nicole’s book: how it came about when she listened to her gut, how it inspires others, and how she wants to change the language about being twice-exceptional Resources: Nicole Tetreault  Find Awesome Neuro on Instagram and Twitter Insight into a Bright Mind: A Neuroscientist’s Personal Stories of Unique Thinking by Nicole A. Tetreault Connect with me: 2E Connection

Today’s solo episode is about a topic that I’ve thought about for a long time, so I’m happy to bring it to you. We will discuss getting an assessment as a gifted or twice-exceptional adult, so I hope you find it helpful for me to share my thoughts and tips. Show Highlights: Considerations that are universal to all assessment types: If you think you are gifted, you probably are. Make sure the person doing the evaluation has experience with giftedness and twice-exceptionality. Realize that every assessment will have limitations and strengths, and every evaluator will have personal biases. Five types of assessments: Diagnostic assessment This will be done with a trained professional who can give a diagnosis. Always look for someone with experience with giftedness and neurodiversity, and ask what tools they use. Psychometric assessment This evaluation can give valuable information about your strengths and weaknesses, and it’s very standardized for comparison to others. It has limitations, like false lows and big gaps in highs and lows. Qualitative assessment This evaluation looks beyond just the numbers with things like observations, records, interviews, etc. It gives very useful information. Self-assessment The challenge in this evaluation is that there is a lot of information to take in. Multimodal assessment This kind of evaluation can be any combination of the other four types; it uses a variety of tools all together. Helpful books: (See Resources for more information.) The Power of Difference, The Dyslexic Advantage, The Gifted Adult, and Your Rainforest Mind Resources: Connect with me: Aurora Remember  Find out our upcoming group call on Overexcitability with Chris Wells:  Embracing Intensity  Check out the following resources: Cognitive Processing Inventory at LDinfo Gifted Adult Checklist at Gifted Development  Paula Prober’s Giftedness Checklist from Your Rainforest Mind Books: The Power of Different by Gail Saltz, M.D. The Dyslexic Advantage by Brock and Fernette Eide The Gifted Adult by Mary-Elaine Jacobsen Your Rainforest Mind by Paula Prober

Today’s show lets you listen to our recent group call with Jeff Harry of Rediscover Your Play. Jeff helps us with tips, insights, and interactive exercises to learn more about “Playing With Your Inner Critic.” Join us to learn more! Jeff Harry is a Workplace Play Consultant, International Play Speaker, and Positive Psychology Play Coach. He helps individuals and companies navigate difficult conversations and address their most challenging issues using play and positive psychology. While we spend most of our time pretending to be important, serious grownups, it’s when we let go of that facade and just play that the real magic happens. Fully embracing your own nerdy genius gives you the power to make a difference and change lives. Jeff believes that we already have many of the answers we seek, and by simply unleashing our inner child, we can find our purpose and help to create a better world. Show Highlights: An interactive exercise to shed light on how we judge ourselves and need to allow more freedom in our mindset The reasons we don’t play anymore are because the external noise and our internal negativity bias keep us from playing. How leaning into our intuitive mind allows us to work with our inner critic How our brain makes connections when in a flow state and allows creative actions How to get in flow: relax, figure out what calms you down, quiet everything, and allow yourself to “get bored” Your inner critic has a playlist; what does yours say? How to identify what your inner critic says to you How to identify what your inner critic sounds like and looks like, and why you need to give it a character name How to empower your inner child by affirming the opposite of what your inner critic says How you can create new neural pathways by using empowering language How addressing your inner critic helps deal with the outer critics How to spark your inner child Why you need to allow feelings to flow through and go How to ask, “What is driving my decision?”(The answer SHOULD be play, curiosity, and experimentation!) What old BS story are you willing to let go? Resources: Rediscover Your Play

Today’s guest is truly a multipotentialite with interests spanning gender nonconformity, psychology, healthy eating, photography, and the creative arts. He has discovered ways to embrace his creativity and merge his talents to offer meaningful help to others in their struggles. Join us to learn more! Greg Halpen is a food blogger and food photographer who created the food blog, Craving the Yum: Eating After Chemo. Chemotherapy can do a number on our palates, leaving our taste buds desensitized and frustrated about what to eat that actually tastes good. Greg gives chemotherapy patients the steps and practical tools to reimagine meals without compromising the YUM factor. Through his food blog, he shares the secrets to preparing meals that are simple, healthy, and extra. Show Highlights: Why Greg is intensely passionate about helping people navigate the frustrating and difficult waters of figuring out what to eat during and after chemo How Greg’s personal brand of intensity covers multiple areas of creativity: music, theater, food blogging, and photography How Greg’s childhood trauma spurred him into creative outlets as coping mechanisms The difficulty for Greg in not having a support system to help him grow as a creative person What Greg wishes he knew back then: “There are people in the world who WILL see you and get you.” The cultural factors that affected Greg as a gay young man with confusing feelings that couldn’t be expressed and realized How digging deep into learning about homophobia and hetero-normative thinking helped Greg cope How Greg has had to purposely shrink himself down to be smaller because of his insecurity as a person How men are affected by sexuality and gender issues very differently than women Why Greg has felt out of control when he couldn’t harness his creativity amidst the chaos of life How Greg uses his fire for good in being of service to others and helping people How he learned the important lesson that he isn’t at the center of everything How therapy, cooking, and helping others with food relationships have helped Greg harness his intensity How Greg helps others use their fire by helping them to make small changes and understand “diet culture confusion” Up next for Greg: writing a book (the free mini-version is available on his website now!) Resources: Craving The Yum   Get Greg’s FREE mini-cookbook, Eating After Chemo! Visit our website to learn more about the Embracing Intensity community and events Visit our new platform with resources and events for the 2E community

I didn't promote last week's episode very much because I got super deep into the rabbit hole on a new project that really. Kind of pulls together a lot of the little projects that I've been doing in this past year. It's called 2E Connection, and it's a directory for twice exceptional folks to share, explore and find support! In this episode: What inspired me to create 2E Connection A sneak peak at some of the content so far How you can support keeping this free site accessible AND sustainable Links: 2E Connection Embracing Intensity Community Harnessing the Power of Your Intensity Workbook

My guest today was diagnosed with ADHD and twice-exceptionality later in life. We have connected through TikTok and are learning a lot from each other. He demonstrates kind accountability in his TikTok posts and shows authenticity in his longer YouTube posts that I greatly appreciate. Join us to hear his unique perspective. Sean Szolek-Van Valkenburgh grew up in Indiana surrounded by orchestral, classical, and contemporary music. His formal musical education began at age 7 when he started studying piano and performing in choral ensembles. As his musical education progressed, he noticed that he had the unusual gift of chromesthesia. Through TikTok, Sean avidly posts about being a professional musician and artist and connects with over 680,000 followers; he refers to them as “kings, queens, and monarchs.” He hopes to provide a safe, inclusive, and entertaining platform that prioritizes genuine content creation and critical thought. Show Highlights: What is chromesthesia? Multiple senses cross in the brain, making it possible to hear music and also see it in colors, textures, and patterns How Sean uses TikTok to share music and chromesthesia Why Sean is intensely passionate about educating and helping people see the world in different ways, especially the “lightbulb” moments of learning How Sean’s personal brand of intensity cuts through to the truth and presents it to people, shining light on obscure areas in the legal system As Sean grew up, he was very adamant about certain fixations, like dominoes and Jenga; his twice-exceptionality was masked by his ability to study and learn, but his ADHD was overlooked for a time How his ADHD impacted the way he planned and self-regulated himself and caused imbalance in his mental health How Sean was socially isolated with a few superficial friendships and focused on his hyperfixations How Sean had to learn in college to apply himself to social constructs The cultural factors that affected Sean as he and his sister were black twins adopted by white parents, and how this helped inform his cultural understanding How Sean had to tone himself down as a counselor at a fine arts summer camp and learn how to expend his energy in appropriate ways Why Sean depends on established routines and structures that work with his ADHD How Sean has gotten out of control on social media in exposing the truth and presenting the facts, sometimes finding it difficult to strike a balance How Sean uses his fire for good in helping people channel their fire into artistic expression in different ways How Sean harnesses the power of his intensity through self-regulation and recognizing the power behind his personality and neurodivergence How Sean recognized his twice-exceptionality How Sean has learned to take time for himself and take mental inventory with introspection Sean’s advice: “Be educated and aware when you speak about ADHD. Know your abilities and disabilities. It’s a long journey. Find your authentic self and work on defining yourself.” How to ask for accommodations What Sean is working on for the future Resources: Find Sean on Instagram:  @seanszolekvanvalkenburgh Find Sean on Twitter:  @SeanSzolek Find Sean on TikTok:  @seansvv 

Our July Guest Call was on Intuitive Flow & Creativity with Kari Betton About Kari: Kari Betton is a coach and mentor for highly sensitive and twice-exceptional people, with a passion for helping them find their innate sense of intuitive flow. Too often, we can be focused on developing our mental health, physical health, intellect, etc, but including intuitive development in our personal development practice creates an easier foundation for all types of development within you to be congruent with each other. A personal intuitive wandering practice can have profound implications on achieving the results and designing the life that you desire. In this call, Kari will focus on how to attain clarity and enough space in your life to listen to the inner wisdom that you already have. In their spare time, Kari enjoys recording and producing their podcast Decolonizing Sexuality, vegan foodie adventures with friends, and painting galaxies. You can find out more about Kari and their work at: simplybybeing.com/ In this episode: What is effort transcendence? Maintaining a trajectory of expansion over time When to give drops, and when to be your fire hose self Links: Embracing Intensity Community Workbook on Harnessing the Power of Your Intensity

I’m excited to introduce you to a speech therapist whose work is informed by the autistic community and her personal experience in identifying as twice-exceptional. Her heart and passion are to help give a voice to those who can’t speak for themselves. Join us! Mara McLoughlin has over ten years of professional experience working with autistic and other neurodivergent people and their families. She has been a student and teacher of yoga and mindfulness for over 25 years, knowing that building these skills can help build a better world. She is a certified provider of the PEERS program that exists for the educational and enrichment of relational skills. With both her bachelor’s and master's degrees in Communication Science and Disorders, she knows that communication is fun, difficult, and the key to life. To learn and gain confidence in the initial steps of founding friendships and self-regulation skills can help improve the lives of everyone. Show Highlights: Why Mara is intensely passionate about yoga and working with autistic people and their families How Mara’s intensity looks like a strong sense of fairness and fiercely advocating for those who can’t speak for themselves, especially those with autism or aphasia due to stroke Growing up, Mara was a precocious speaker who struggled in school and was a determined but difficult child How the masking component has affected Mara in “code-switching” according to different situations The misconception about autism and the children who aren’t identified by their response to social cues The relationship between non-binary gender identification and autism How cultural factors affected Mara as she grew up in white, conservative, suburban Chicago as she didn’t follow the “rulebook” or the status quo Why she was unsuccessful in toning herself down or tuning herself out because she couldn’t conform to others’ expectations How Mara moved to the West Coast and found where she fits in and feels at home How a stroke affected her partner at age 43 and brought out Mara’s advocacy skills How Mara uses her fire for good by being a fierce advocate for people who have different brains, helping to build capacity in environments for different learners How Mara harnesses the power of her intensity through breathing, yoga and movement, meditation, mindfulness, and gratitude How Mara helps others use their fire through the PEERS program with social and emotional development in making and keeping friends and solving conflict Mara’s business, IRL Social skills, which is a collective of speech-language pathologists and occupational therapists who help families of autistic teens and adults How Mara uses immersion therapy in her work Resources: Connect with Mara:  irl Social Skills.com  Find IRL Social Skills on Facebook and Mara McLoughlin on Twitter and @pawsomesocialskills on Instagram. There are lots of upcoming great events happening in the EI Community. Check us out at Embracing Intensity 

A while back I had seen a lot of posts about the overlap and similarities between ADHD and Autism, and it got me thinking about some observations I’d made both personally and professionally testing neurodivergent kids over the years. I posted this tweet asking folks the following questions: Curious with the #Autism vs. #ADHD discussions recently, if you have one or both, what do you relate to more: Big Picture vs. Details Order vs. Chaos Think in Words vs. Pictures Acquired Knowledge vs. Novel Problem Solving Process Fast vs. Slow Elaboration Welcome More recently I posted the same questions with elaboration on TikTok and the responses were fascinating! I think my biggest takeaway from hearing personal accounts from so many neurodivergent folks is that even when there’s a consistent pattern that is statistically more likely in a specific area of neurodivergence, they are not hard and fast rules.