The Art of Charm

James Clear discusses the importance of mental models in decision-making, reading unique and older books, developing mental models by connecting ideas, generating new ideas through the inversion technique, increasing luck through quantity and quality, simplifying and focusing for greater results, and the power of mental models in various fields.

Judah Pollack (@JudahThinks) and Olivia Fox Cabane (@foxcabane) rejoin the show to discuss their new book, The Net and the Butterfly: The Art and Practice of Breakthrough Thinking. The Cheat Sheet: What is breakthrough thinking -- and how does it relate to nets and butterflies? Though we all have the same brain architecture, why do some of us find breakthrough thinking more natural than others? Learn how to access your brain's genius lounge (without being impeded by your brain's executive office). Understand how your brain pieces together disparate information to solve problems in unique ways.  Spot your own native breakthrough style and cultivate habits that more frequently activate it. And so much more... Learn over 500 subjects (no tests or homework!) at The Great Courses Plus -- The Art of Charm listeners get one month free here! Whether you're a lady or a gent, you don't need to know what MicroModal fabric is to enjoy the comfort of MeUndies; you just need to wear them -- support this show (and yourself) with MeUndies here for 20% off! Want three free rides up to $10 each? Download the free Lyft app today and enter promo code AOCPODCAST in the payment section! Please help The Art of Charm Podcast stay free-to-download with minimal ads by taking this quick and easy survey here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/591/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If something can be learned, it is a skill. If it's innate, it's a talent. The reality: most so-called talents are skills in disguise, so stop making excuses that you're not talented enough to do things and skill up! Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: The concept of "talent" is overrated. If something can be learned, it is a skill. If it's innate, it's a talent. A lot of so-called talents are really skills in disguise. If even one person can learn something through study, coaching, and effort, it's learnable -- therefore, a skill. Next time you put off an activity because you think you're not "talented" enough, try to determine if you're just using it as an excuse. Maybe you avoid shooting hoops with your coworkers on lunch break because you think they're all so much more talented than you. While it might be true that you suck at basketball, it's a skill you can improve with practice. If you want to learn the skill of systematically attacking belief systems, building confidence, and forming personal and professional relationships we invite you to take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text CHARMED to 33444. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he actually reads everything)! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/mm40/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In the process of getting in better shape, is it too much to ask that the people you attract are similarly trying to improve their own lives in some way? Your partner is perfect in every way until the alcohol comes out. How do you deal with this Jekyll and Hyde scenario? You're really just shy, but people think you're arrogant because you don't mingle well. It's a common problem, but we've got an uncommon solution. Can deep work happen in a team setting, or does it need to be an isolated process? Deep Work author Cal Newport weighs in. Does organizing your life by calendar weeks or months in advance put a damper on flexibility? Jordan can't run 25 miles barefoot, but he can do this. Quick shoutouts to Glenn, Nick, and our number one fan (she knows who she is)! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Wearing a stylish timepiece shouldn't break the bank. Art of Charm listeners can find out why MVMT is the fastest-growing watch company in the world for 15% off with free shipping and free returns here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/fmf101/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Steven Kotler (@steven_kotler) revisits the show to discuss his latest book, Stealing Fire: How Silicon Valley, the Navy SEALs, and Maverick Scientists Are Revolutionizing the Way We Live and Work. The Cheat Sheet: Why did psychology take a hundred-year detour around the therapeutic benefits of non-ordinary states of consciousness (NOSC)? Learn about ecstasis -- a specific range of NOSC sought by high performers like Navy SEALs and the elites in Silicon Valley. Compare the speed of conscious thought versus the speed of unconscious thought. What's the difference between ecstasis and flow? How MDMA-assisted psychotherapy significantly outperforms traditional talk therapy and medication in treating PTSD -- sometimes curing it completely. And so much more... Learn over 500 subjects (no tests or homework!) at The Great Courses Plus -- The Art of Charm listeners get one month free here! With pain-free invoicing, FreshBooks helps entrepreneurs and freelancers save time and avoid a lot of the stress that comes with running a small business. Try a month of unrestricted use for free here (no credit card required)! Enter "ART OF CHARM" in the how you heard about us section. Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/590/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jonathan Raymond (@jonathanraymond) is the owner of management training startup Refound and author of Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For. The Cheat Sheet: What's the real purpose of a business? Why should a business owner or manager treat employees with the same respect afforded to the most valuable customers? Understand why getting rid of old, inherited beliefs about being in an authority position are critical to becoming the kind of leader people want to work for. How can countless microbehaviors among members of a workforce add up to negatively influence a company's culture, and what can we do to address them? Are you a Friend, a Fighter, or a Fixer? Learn to identify your own leadership archetype and work with its strengths and weaknesses. And so much more... A gift from the heart is always worth giving -- like farm-to-table and artisan florist bouquets from bouqs.com. Art of Charm listeners enter promo code CHARM to get 20% off! Freshly dipped strawberries from Shari's Berries starting at just $19.99 plus shipping -- double the berries for just $10 more! Just go to berries.com and use code Art of Charm! Please help The Art of Charm Podcast stay free-to-download with minimal ads by taking this quick and easy survey here! The One You Feed is a podcast by Eric Zimmer and Chris Forbes that hosts inspiring conversations about creating a life worth living. Check it out here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/589/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. Um, like, so today we're going to talk about filler words -- why you should avoid using them, and how to shed them for good. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: When you're trying to convey a message with credibility, it's not just what you say, but how you say it. Overuse of filler words like "um" and "like" are lessening the impact of that message. Even if we think we've got a handle on filler words by consciously choosing not to use them, tension and stress can make us forget. Like any other bad habits, the filler words we use need to be attacked with deliberate practice. You may not even be aware of the filler words you use. Record your side of a few phone conversations using an app like TapeACall or Call Recorder for Skype. Get a simple audio editor like the free Audacity; edit out all of the filler words from your conversations above. Do this with a twenty-minute call every week and the editing alone should drive home how much work you're putting into generating filler words that have no place in meaningful conversation. A gap of silence is always better than meaningless filler words. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text CHARMED to 33444. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he actually reads everything)! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/mm39/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Breakup Triage: The Cure for Heartache author Susan Winter rejoins us to answer a couple of questions that were addressed to her and help with our usual assortment of email in this Fan Mail Friday. Let's get to it! In this episode: Should a broken relationship be mended when the primary glue is guilt? It says more about the people who have cheated on you in multiple relationships than it does about you when you're always faithful and loving. But maybe you should review your selection process. Is there help for an attention craver who knowingly jeopardizes relationships by habitually flirting with strangers? Let's unpack the relationship exit strategy idea we talked about in Susan's episode and never got around to finishing (sorry)! How do you get over the jealousy you feel when your partner brings up past sexual exploits with other people? Is it possible to set new boundaries in a relationship (especially a marriage) once old ones have been established? Quick shoutouts to psychologist Linda and Lyft driver Simon! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! With pain-free invoicing, FreshBooks helps entrepreneurs and freelancers save time and avoid a lot of the stress that comes with running a small business. Try a month of unrestricted use for free here (no credit card required)! Enter "ART OF CHARM" in the how you heard about us section. Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/fmf100/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Travis Bradberry, co-author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 and co-founder of TalentSmart, dives deep into the world of emotional intelligence. He shares how understanding and improving EQ can greatly impact personal and professional success. The conversation explores self-assessment as a tool for growth, the importance of social awareness, and the link between quality sleep and emotional management. Listeners learn how to navigate their emotional responses and foster genuine connections for better interpersonal relationships.

Peter Diamandis (@PeterDiamandis) is the founder of the XPRIZE Foundation and co-author of Bold: How to Go Big, Create Wealth and Impact the World and Abundance: The Future Is Better Than You Think. The Cheat Sheet: What does the future hold for human longevity, space colonization, artificial intelligence, and beyond? How can we adapt -- individually and as a society -- to deal with increased automation in the workforce? What is linear thinking and why does it cause us to miss the mark when coping with technology, innovation, and the advancement of the human race? If you don't know your calling in life, your calling in life is to discover what that is. What experiments can kids curious about science do that won't get them put on a no-fly list for the foreseeable future? And so much more... Hate grocery shopping but you love to cook? Blue Apron delivers recipes and farm fresh ingredients to you. As an Art of Charm listener, you get your first two meals free here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! You know James Altucher -- he's been on The Art of Charm, and Jordan's been on his show. We share a lot of similar guests, but we ask different questions. Check out The James Altucher Show here! Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/587/ HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices