The Art of Charm

In today’s episode, we cover negotiation with Anne-Maartje Oud. Anne is a behavioral advisor, trainer, and the CEO & founder of The Behaviour Company based in Amsterdam. Your behavior plays an essential role in getting your message across, so what can you do to make sure your message doesn’t get lost, why is emotional validation crucial if you want to be a great leader, and how should you prepare for and handle conflict in the workplace? What to Listen For The biggest myths about reading body language – 1:30 What can reading body language tell you about someone and what can it NOT tell you? What questions can you ask yourself to find out what external and internal factors might be influencing your body language? What can you do if you are over analyzing your communication to the detriment of your relationships and career? The brain-body connection and how you feel – 18:05 What are easy ways you can convey trustworthiness in the workplace? What changes can you make to boost the effectiveness of your speaking and presentation style through Zoom? What are pacifying behaviors and why do we need to be on the lookout for them when talking to someone or a group of people? The importance of validation in the workplace – 36:46 What is emotional validation and why do you need to have a handle on it if you want to be an effective leader? What kind of feedback should you avoid giving if you want to lead your team effectively? DOs and DON'Ts of dealing with conflict in the workplace – 46:30 What are the 4 ways people use to deal with conflict and which ways should you avoid if you don’t want to lose your relationships? What can you do to prepare yourself emotionally for a difficult conversation or confrontation so you don’t lose your cool when it matters? What advice surrounding body language should you avoid at all cost? A person’s body language communicates a great deal about the person, but it’s not magic. In order to effectively understand body language, it’s important to dispel some of the myths surrounding body language so you know its limits. Body language can give you a glimpse into what a person might be feeling at that moment, but it cannot tell you what they’re thinking. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Anne-Maartje Oud on Twitter Anne-Maartje Oud on LinkedIn Art of Charm podcast with Joe Navarro The Importance of Validation by Joe Navarro, Anne-Maartje Oud Dangerous Personalities by Joe Navarro Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover negotiation with Dr. Victoria Medvec. Dr. Medvec a master negotiator, Kellogg professor, CEO of Medvec & Associates, and is the author of Negotiate Without Fear: Strategies and Tools to Maximize Your Outcomes. Negotiating is a part of life, personally and professionally, so how should we be looking at it, how can we remove the fear and anxiety from negotiating, and what strategies can you implement from a professional negotiator to take your negotiating skills to the next level? What to Listen For Dr. Victoria Medvec’s origin story – 1:35 What do great negotiators enjoy about the act of negotiating? What are the biggest fears people have about negotiating that prevent them from getting what they deserve and what can you do to overcome those fears? What is the most important element of effective negotiation and how can you use it to overcome your fears of negotiating? Creating win-win negotiation outcomes – 12:59 How can you think about future negotiations in a way that makes both parties excited about the outcome? What questions can you ask in a negotiation to get a better understanding of what the other party is looking to get out of the negotiation? What does it mean to prepare for a negotiation and how can you show the other party during the negotiation that you’ve put in the work ahead of time? Common traps many expert negotiators fall into – 23:07 What are the 3 most common traps experienced negotiators fall into and what can you do to avoid falling into those traps? How do you bring creativity into negotiating to ensure both parties walk away from the negotiation with a win? Why are emotion and storytelling important in the art of negotiation? Managing emotions during negotiations – 37:00 What 4 steps can you take to manage the emotions during negotiations to prevent them from ruining a deal and making you and/or your company look bad? How do you effectively negotiate your salary to get what you deserve while also giving the company a positive outcome? How do different generations view negotiation and why is it important? What are We typically associate the word “negotiation” with negotiating a raise or negotiating the price of a car, but in reality just about anything can be negotiated. Unfortunately, many of us never try to negotiate because negotiating seems intimidating, or we just assume the price or cost of something is set in stone. If you want to get what you deserve out of life, no one is going to give it to you, you must be willing to know your worth and ask for it. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Negotiate Without Fear by Victoria Medvec Medvec & Associates: Critical Decision and Negotiation Partners website Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover charisma with AJ, Johnny, and Michael. Charisma can make the difference between a fulfilling life and a depressing lonely existence, but what actually is charisma, why is it so powerful, and how can you develop it to bring out the best in you and the people around you? What to Listen For What is charisma? – 1:10 How does science define and perceive charisma? What is it about charismatic leaders that makes them stand out and what can you learn from them? Can charisma be learned? The importance of being present – 11:02 What are the three internal dials you can play with in order to figure out the level of charisma best suited for your personality? What does it mean to be present and why is it important if you want to be charismatic? Turning up your enthusiasm – 26:30 What do many people get wrong about enthusiasm and what does it mean to live with more enthusiasm? What simple changes can you make right now to be more enthusiastic in your interactions with other people? What easy steps can you take to increase your enthusiasm and put you in a better mood? Confidence is the key to unlocking your potential – 40:15 When is confidence most useful and why do those times also allow you to strengthen your confidence? Charisma might feel like something a person just has, but like many traits, it can be broken down into easily understood components. Once you understand what those components are, you can then take steps to develop them and allow your personality to shine by being a more charismatic version of yourself. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Charisma: An Ill-Defined and Ill-Measured Gift Skills vs. Attributes: What Should You Focus On Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover memory improvement and competition with Dr. Johannes Mallow. Johannes is a 2-times World Memory Champion, completed a PhD thesis on the topic of Magnetic resonance imaging (MRI), and worked as a researcher and engineer at the University of Magdeburg. Our ability to recall complex information is one of our defining characteristics as humans, but what do we get wrong about memory, what daily exercises can you perform to improve your memory, and what can you learn about memory from a memory world champion? What to Listen For Dr. Johannes Mallow’s journey into memory games – 1:46 What do people enjoy about memory competitions? What exercises can you do to train your memory and improve it? How does Dr. Johannes Mallow memorize a deck of cards in 20 seconds? The science of memory vs the sport of memory – 14:35 What is the brain great at memorizing and how can you use that fact to avoid forgetting important information? How does training for memory sports impact your memory in your day to day life? Simple strategies for memorizing people’s names – 21:39 What can you do if you find yourself in a high pressure situation and you need to remember something but your mind goes blank? What daily memory exercises can anyone perform to improve it? Most common misconceptions about training memory – 39:06 Why should we be concerned about developing our memory when we have powerful devices at our fingertips to remember things for us? The secret 2000 year old memory technique – 51:13 What is the memory palace technique and how can you use it to remember almost anything? What is the keyword method and how can you use it to learn new languages? Your memory is like a muscle. The more you train your ability to recall information, the better you will become at it. Humans have been working to improve their memory for thousands of years and have come up with some great techniques along the way, and if you have five minutes to spare each day, you can improve your memory so you stop forgetting names of people you just met, important upcoming events, and your anniversary! A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Dr. Johannes Mallow’s website The Caretaker - Everywhere At The End Of Time Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover becoming exceptional with Joe Navarro. Joe is a retired FBI special agent and recognized as one of the world’s foremost authorities on reading nonverbal communication. He has co-authored many international best sellers including What Every Body is Saying, The Dictionary of Body Language, Advanced Interviewing Techniques, and his latest one, Be Exceptional: Master the Five Traits That Set Extraordinary People Apart. Being an exceptional human doesn’t require anything out of the ordinary, but there are a handful of necessary traits to focus on if you want to be exceptional, so what are they and how do you develop them? What to Listen For What does it mean to be exceptional – 1:53 Why aren’t we taught how to be exceptional or charming when we’re growing up, and how can we learn to be so today? The five traits of exceptional people – 15:21 What does self-mastery look like in today’s world and why is it important if you want to be exceptional at anything? Why is the skill of observation important and what can you do to improve it? What is more important to us than validation and why do we mistake it for seeking perfection? The biggest misconception about giving validation – 38:30 Can you give validation to someone while also disagreeing with them? How are validation and trust related? Strategies to start divisive conversations on the right foot – 45:02 How do you have a productive conversation with someone who is clearly married to an ideology and doesn’t want to listen? What simple exercise can you use to better understand yourself and your worldview? Anyone can be exceptional, but not everyone is willing to understand what it takes and work at it. For example, being observant is a trait of exceptional people according to Joe Navarro, and being observant seems like a rather basic trait, doesn’t it? The problem is most people don’t think about or question what they observe. When most people think they’re being observant, they’re really just noticing something and instantly passing judgement on it. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Joe Navarro’s website Be Exceptional by Joe Navarro What Every BODY is Saying by Joe Navarro Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover human connection and networking with Susan McPherson. Susan has 25+ years of experience in marketing, public relations, and sustainability communications, and is the author of The Lost Art of Connecting: The Gather, Ask, Do Method for Building Meaningful Relationships. As we emerge from lockdown, connecting and reconnecting can feel difficult, so what can you do to set yourself apart, forge lasting connections with those you meet, and reconnect with friends you haven’t spoken to in years? What to Listen For How lonely and disconnected are we according to science – 3:05 Why does negativity spread more on the internet than positivity? What is the Gather, Ask, Do method and how can you use it to form stronger connections with the people around you? The critical objective of today’s youth in a digital age – 14:38 What is the power of reciprocity and how can it help you grow an amazing network? What questions can you ask if you genuinely want to help the people around you? What questions should you avoid at all cost if you sincerely want to help people? Tips for introverts to connect better – 28:24 What is pre-connecting and how can you use it to make networking easier and less stressful while also being more effective as an introvert? What should you focus on when meeting people at networking events and what should you NOT focus on? What tips can you use to reconnect with people after the pandemic/lockdown? The big myths around connecting with others – 44:40 What simple tips can you use to amplify your effectiveness when meeting people and creating unforgettable first impressions? What are the best five follow up tips when networking to make sure your hard work doesn’t go to waste? Connecting with others is one of the key ways to get ahead. With the tips and strategies in this episode, you’ll create deep connections and your connections will multiply exponentially. Even as an introvert, you can forge lasting relationships and reconnect with old friends you haven’t spoken to in years. Take these lessons from our experts on how to become a force of nature who gets things done effortlessly while creating lifelong bonds along the way! A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode McPherson Strategies website Susan McPherson on Twitter Susan McPherson on LinkedIn The Lost Art of Connecting by Susan McPherson 5 Ways to Listen Better TED Talk by Julian Treasure Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we talk about MeetUp with David Siegel. David is the CEO of MeetUp and the host of the new podcast Keep Connected. People are feeling lonely now more than ever, so what can you do if you’re feeling lonely, where can you go to meet new friends who share your interests, and what is the cheat code to making new friends anywhere you go? What to Listen For How did the Art of Charm get started using MeetUp? – 2:50 When creating an account on MeetUp, should you try to join MeetUp groups or create/host your own? Why are people suffering from loneliness now more than ever and what can you do about it? The evolution of MeetUp through the pandemic – 10:51 How did the pandemic affect people’s willingness to meet up using sites like MeetUp? Is it a good time to start attending events and MeetUp groups in person yet? Are MeetUp groups welcoming to introverts? – 24:15 What kinds of MeetUp groups should an introvert attend and avoid? Is MeetUp a good tool for professional networking? What sports should you look into if you’re interested in trying something new and popular? Can you find MeetUp groups that center around happiness and mental well-being? The cheat code to meeting a lot of people – 43:52 What are 3 traits of the best organizers on MeetUp? How do the best hosts on MeetUp provide great experiences for the attendees? What are the 3 steps in giving value that solidify a connection with guests and members who attend your events? What are the top 5 best practices in networking can you implement in your next MeetUp event? In a post-COVID world, people are struggling to figure out ways to be social again and get a handle on the loneliness they experienced during the lockdown. What better way to do both than find a group of likeminded humans on a site like MeetUp? One of the major advantages MeetUp groups/events have for people who aren’t sure how to make friends is that MeetUp self-selects for people who are open to meeting new people. That means people who attend MeetUp groups are going to be friendly, welcoming, and approachable. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode MeetUp Keep Connected Podcast hosted by MeetUp CEO David Siegel David Siegel on LinkedIn David Siegel on Twitter Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover the mastery of sales with Jeb Blount. Jeb is the best-selling author of over 13 books and among the world’s most respected thought leaders on sales, leadership, and customer experience. He helps leaders to develop leadership and coaching skills and shows them how to apply a more effective organizational design and cultivate a high performance sales culture. Sales is often considered a field for extroverts, so why do world-class salespeople consider introverts to have the greatest potential, what can you do as an introvert to become a great salesperson, and what is the biggest challenge introverts face in sales? What to Listen For How Jeb Blount get started in sales – 1:06 Can introverts be world-class performers in sales? What are the three myths about sales? – 5:35 What are the five basic questions people ask themselves about you when talking to you? What do so many people get wrong about being great at sales? What is the greatest gift you can give another human being and why is that gift critical in the world of sales? The one problem introverts have in sales – 9:46 What are the two types of listening and when should you use each one? What can you do to stop making assumptions? – 23:45 What is the WAIT acronym and how can you use it to keep yourself in check when interacting with potential customers? Why are moments of silence in conversation so important in sales? Theses traits mean certain failure for people new to sales – 35:00 What is one of the biggest hurdles entrepreneurs face when starting a business for the first time? What can you do to overcome yesterday’s mistakes every day you wake up? Strategies for handling objections – 46:45 What framework can you use for overcoming objections? What is the difference between a good salesperson and a great salesperson? Introverts aren’t regularly associated with great salesmanship, but as the world evolves, introverts have an edge in sales. People want to be valued and they want to be understood. The more you can listen and ask questions, the better idea you will have about how you can solve their problem. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Jeb Blount’s website Sales Gravy Sales EQ by Jeb Blount Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover the fundamentals of sales with Wes Schaeffer. Wes is the creator and owner of The Sales Whisperer, a sales training, marketing and consulting firm with an emphasis on CRM & email marketing software sales, support and optimization. Sales skills are integral to our daily lives because we are regularly trying to solve problems and get other people to buy into our ideas, so what are the fundamentals of great salesmanship, how can you work to improve your sales skills, and why do you need to be a great listener to be great at sales? What to Listen For How did Wes Schaeffer get started in sales – 3:00 Do you need to be an entrepreneur to get the most out of life? How should you think about your day job if you dream of being your own boss one day? The biggest misconception about people who are not in sales – 8:10 Why do we need some degree of sales skills to be successful in all areas of life and what can you do to improve yours? The new ABC’s of sales – 12:35 What is the difference between influencing, persuading, and manipulating someone? What do great sales people understand about the actual significance of the transaction stage in making a sale? What is the difference between mediocre and great salesmanship? – 24:00 What mistakes do new people in sales make to shoot themselves in the foot over the long term? What should you be trying to identify when talking to a potential customer that will allow you to determine the perfect product or service to address their needs? The two halves of listening – 33:40 Why do people experience beginner's luck? What should you focus on when improving your sales skills? What is the difference between education and training? Anytime you are trying to influence or persuade someone, you are utilizing sales skills. It can be something as simple as convincing your friends where the best place to get dinner is, or persuading your boss to give you a two week extension on a deadline. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Wes Schaeffer's website The Sales Podcast hosted by Wes Schaeffer The Sales Whisperer Way by Wes Schaeffer Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, we cover becoming unstoppable with AJ, Johnny, and Michael. Anyone can develop confidence that makes you unstoppable, but what does it even mean to be unstoppable, what is stopping you from being more confident today, and why does avoiding the process lead to feeling miserable? What to Listen For Why do most people never become confident? – 3:22 What is the biggest misconception people have about developing confidence? What are the 3 reasons people can’t start being more confident? – 5:30 What assumptions do you make about other people that get in the way of developing your confidence? What does a real-world definition of confidence look like? What does it mean to have unstoppable confidence? – 11:00 How should you start thinking about your thoughts and emotions if you want unstoppable confidence? Why is it dangerous to wait for you to have confidence before taking action? Stop reading books and take action – 18:00 Why does avoiding your fears make taking action more difficult? Why does reading too much actually cripple your ability to grow and reach your potential? Why does avoiding discomfort cause life to suck? – 25:50 Why is it detrimental to your growth to surround yourself with people who avoid fear and who should you surround yourself with? What can you do to start attracting a high-value social circle? – 32:20 Why is growth impossible as long as you are in your comfort zone? How do confident people think about fear and anxiety? – 50:45 The path to unstoppable confidence is a simple one. Stop reading books and take action, stop avoiding discomfort in life because avoiding it will cause your life to suck, and attract high-value social circles by thinking about fear and anxiety differently than most people do. A Word From Our Sponsors Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrates your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here! Resources from this Episode Become Unstoppable with the Art of Charm Check in with AJ and Johnny! AJ on Instagram Johnny on Instagram The Art of Charm on Instagram The Art of Charm on YouTube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices