Connection Codes

Tera, Dr. Glenn, and Phyllis dive into the powerful interplay between vulnerability and safety in relationships. Drawing from personal stories, cultural examples, and decades of work with Connection Codes, they unpack how many of us were raised to silence emotions—and how this creates barriers to intimacy. The hosts explore why vulnerability is not weakness but the very act that creates safety, and how micro-moments of authentic sharing lay the foundation for trust. With practical insights, like using the Core Emotion Wheel and reframing fear, this conversation equips you to transform your relationships into safe spaces where real connection can thriveChapters:- 00:00:00 - TV shows and vulnerability- 00:01:20 - Introducing core concepts- 00:04:51 - Childhood lessons on suppression- 00:07:51 - The vulnerability paradox- 00:11:12 - Unfamiliar territory- 00:15:30 - Foundation-building moments- 00:19:24 - Recognizing safe people- 00:23:30 - Fear vs. safety- 00:28:39 - Everyday vulnerability- 00:35:26 - The cab story- 00:41:42 - Authenticity without guarantees- 00:47:35 - Losing and finding relationships- 00:53:01 - The Core Emotion Wheel- 00:58:04 - Starting your journeyLinks and Resources:- https://connectioncodes.co/- https://connectioncodes.co/get-the-cew- https://www.amazon.com/Connection-Codes-Blueprint-Creating-Relationships-ebook/dp/B093TLDT71

In this episode Tera, Dr. Glenn, and Phyllis take on one of the most misunderstood and weaponized words in relationships: forgiveness. They unpack why simply saying “I forgive you” rarely brings peace, and how unprocessed pain lingers in the body long after conflict. Through personal stories, faith reflections, and the practical tools of the Connection Codes, they reveal why true healing comes through release—acknowledging, voicing, and processing hurt in safe spaces. Listeners will learn how to move beyond judgment, create authentic emotional connection, and experience freedom without erasing their pain or enabling harmful dynamicsChapters:00:00:00 - Setting the Stage for Authentic Healing00:02:09 - Rethinking Forgiveness: Moving Beyond Traditional Approaches00:04:26 - How Forgiveness Gets Weaponized in Relationships00:11:04 - The Compassionate Truth About Forgiveness in Faith00:15:47 - Creating Safety to Process Pain Together00:29:34 - Why Simply Saying "I Forgive You" Doesn't Heal the Hurt00:36:53 - Embracing Emotions as Pathways to Deeper Connection00:47:42 - Real-Life Example: Using the Emotion Wheel in Relationships00:54:55 - Practical Next Steps for Your Relationship JourneyLinks and Resources:- Connection Codes Emotion Wheel - https://connectioncodes.co/wheel-download- Connection Codes Book - https://www.amazon.com/Connection-Codes-Blueprint-Creating-Relationships/dp/B093QCHZ76- Become a Connection Codes Coach - https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching#certifiedcoachingtopofhome

In this vulnerable and empowering conversation, host Tera Wages sits down with Ally Bullock — licensed marriage and family therapist, Head of Relationships at Paired, and creator of Relationships with Ally. Together, they unpack the realities of sex and intimacy after parenting. From mismatched desire and the weight of invisible labor, to the science behind stress and sexual satisfaction, Ally shares practical strategies couples can use to reconnect. Listeners will hear real-life stories, expert insights, and powerful tools — like co-regulation rituals, responsive desire reframes, and scheduling intimacy — that can transform the way partners approach connection in the busiest seasons of life.Chapters:00:00:00 - Welcome to Connection Codes Podcast00:00:27 - Meet Aly Bullock00:01:50 - 45% of parents report less intimacy00:03:58 - Aly's Background: A marriage and family therapist with the Paired app00:05:48 - Aly's Personal Story: Marriage, three kids, and "chaotic" life00:07:28 - How does sex change after kids?00:08:13 - Why Intimacy Decreases00:09:00 - Feeling "touched out" after 10 years of pregnancy/nursing00:10:17 - Desire Types: Spontaneous vs. responsive desire explained00:12:55 - Use a shared note to "brain dump" the mental load00:15:47 - Reframing Expectations: Embrace a new normal post-kids00:17:45 - Why to Schedule Sex00:19:06 - Study: A mother's stress predicts lower sexual satisfaction for both partners00:20:00 - A New Approach: Schedule "intimacy time," not just sex00:24:08 - A Moment of Empathy: Tera's husband experiences overstimulation00:25:37 - Tip for Overstimulation: Co-regulation with back-to-back breathing00:28:03 - Use AirPods with relaxing music during sex00:28:53 - Study: Small, daily intimate acts boost satisfaction00:30:18 - Identity Matters00:31:21 - Tip on Identity: Separate your "parent" and "partner" roles00:32:21 - Intimacy can get better with time00:41:41 - Recap: A summary of the episode's key tips00:42:13 - Resource: The Paired app's "Recharge Your Sex Life" course00:42:57 - How to Connect with AlyLinks and Resources:Relationship with Aly Website:Aly on InstagramAly on ⁠LinkedIn⁠:⁠ Aly BullockGet Paired at 25% off: http://www.paired.com/alypodcastDownload the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠

In this powerful conversation, Dr. Glenn and Phyllis talk with Paul and Hannah McClure—musicians, parents, and certified Connection Codes coaches—about the journey of learning to process emotions instead of drowning in them. The McClures share openly about walking through miscarriage, facing parenting challenges, and breaking free from long seasons of disconnection. They describe how simple tools like the Core Emotion Wheel gave them language for their feelings, transformed their marriage, and reshaped the way they connect as a family. This episode is an invitation to slow down, honor what you feel, and discover how vulnerability can lead to lasting healing and deeper relationships.Chapters:00:00:00 – Welcome to the Connection Codes Podcast00:00:57 – Meet Paul & Hannah00:01:34 – Story of meeting as teens and family background00:02:41 – Discovery of the program in 2020 through webinars00:03:15 – How the tools helped process miscarriage00:04:44 – Reflection on “choose joy” culture and parenting impact00:05:31 – Childhood experience of suppressing emotions00:07:23 – Demonstration of the Core Emotion Wheel00:09:27 – Feelings of anger, guilt, and loneliness in friendships00:11:16 – Fear about an album release and hurt from a trip00:13:00 – Key victories and struggles with the tools00:14:23 – Resolving conflict in Hawaii by naming hurt00:17:30 – How minutes of processing prevent days of disconnect00:19:51 – Example of using the wheel during a cancer diagnosis00:25:00 – Motivation for becoming coaches00:27:18 – Coaching removed the pressure of having all the answers00:30:04 – How unprocessed joy can lead to poor choices00:32:04 – The wheel as a manual for navigating trauma00:37:29 – Fear of drowning in emotions00:40:10 – Seeing past anger to identify underlying hurtLinks and Resources:Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠

Tera Wages sits down with Dr. Glenn and Phyllis Hill to unpack the heart behind launching the School of Connection. Together, they explore why disconnection is one of the most dangerous forces in marriages, families, and workplaces, and how community becomes the missing piece for lasting transformation. With real stories of parents using the Core Emotion Wheel, couples breaking the cycle of conflict, and individuals rediscovering hope, this conversation reveals a clear path from isolation to authentic connection. If you’ve ever longed for deeper relationships or wondered how to move from surviving to thriving, this episode offers practical tools and an inspiring vision for healing through connectionChapters:(00:00:00) - Welcome to Connection Codes Podcast(00:02:12) - The Big Announcement(00:03:12) - Identifying the Need for Human Connection(00:04:20) - Announcing the "School of Connection"(00:05:01) - Why Everyone Needs This(00:06:17) - Phyllis on the Power of a "Deep Dive"(00:07:19) - A Health Journey vs. Relational Health(00:09:07) - The Pain of Loneliness When Success Isn't Enough(00:11:58) - Why Handing Someone a Chainsaw Doesn't Make Them an Ice Sculptor(00:13:46) - Phyllis on the Burden of Meeting the Community's Needs(00:17:44) - The Unexpected Transformations: Restored Marriages and Found Voices(00:19:30) - "People are Dating Robots"(00:23:14) - My 6-Year-Old Coached Me Through Conflict(00:25:09) - Aiming to "Freak Out Over a 10-Minute Conflict"(00:28:20) - "We Did the Book, But That Wasn't Enough"(00:33:19) - Who This Is For: Breaking Free From Walking on Eggshells(00:35:08) - Discovering a Spouse's Hidden Pain(00:40:47) - How to Join: Announcing the First Cohort Start Date(00:43:43) - The Team's Core Emotions About the New School(00:44:03) - Fear and Joy of Launching the Program(00:47:23) - The Anger of Financial Limitations(00:50:48) - The Rarity of Hearing the Real Story Behind a Business(00:52:45) - The Path to Becoming a Certified CoachLinks and Resources:Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠

For nearly two decades, Zephan and Sarah's marriage was in "survival mode". On the surface, everything seemed "fine," but underneath, a painful disconnect was growing—one partner felt "particularly lonely," while the other "had no idea". A pivotal moment during a podcast recording led to an emotional "dam break," forcing them to confront years of unspoken pain. In this episode, Zephan and Sarah share their powerful journey of moving beyond a "people pleaser" dynamic and ineffective relationship "rules". They discuss navigating the chaotic first six months—a period they call "Pandora's Box"—to build a foundation of true emotional safety and transform their communication, learning how to become a true "witness for your life".Chapters:00:00:00 - Welcome to the Connection Codes Podcast00:03:16 - Meet Zephan & Sarah00:04:12 - Why Connection Codes Was Different: How it became a "way of life," not just a quick fix.00:05:13 - The First 10 Years: Reflecting on the intensity and "survival mode" of early marriage.00:06:11 - The Turning Point: A failed podcast recording reveals one partner's hidden pain.00:08:43 - Defining Connection: The pain caused by differing views on what connection looks like.00:09:36 - The People-Pleaser Dynamic: How managing a partner's emotions prevents intimacy.00:10:30 - The Problem with "Rules": Why rule-based methodologies for relationships often fail.00:11:08 - The Core Principle of Safety: The commitment to "be safe for one another."00:13:37 - The "Dam Break" of Loneliness: Finding the language to define loneliness within the marriage.00:15:12 - Learning to "Ooh" a Partner's Pain: Validating a partner without taking on their pain as shame.00:15:53 - Seeing "Micro-Resisting": Noticing the pattern of people resisting each other's emotions.00:16:56 - The Journey of Oohing Yourself: Not resisting your own emotions as a path to self-discovery.00:22:39 - Finding Your Voice: How a safe group environment helps in sharing difficult emotions.00:23:58 - A New Way to Argue: Moving from "I'm not enough" to "I'm feeling lonely."00:29:41 - The "Pandora's Box" Phase: The scary and difficult first six months of doing the work.00:31:05 - How to Navigate Early Stages: Advice on staying curious to find connection at the bottom of the pain.00:36:40 - The Vital Role of Community: How supportive friends were essential to their journey.00:38:43 - A Partner as a "Witness": The profound purpose of a committed partnership.00:41:31 - Core Emotion Wheel Practice: The couple shares their current emotions using the wheel exercise.00:45:55 - Connecting with the Guests: How to find Zephan and Sarah for coaching.Links and Resources:Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠Haven Coaching Website: https://www.havencoaching.net/homeHaven Coaching on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thehavencoaching/

Dr. Glenn and Phyllis Hill welcome their grandson, Asher Hill, to share his journey of learning and practicing the Connection Codes Core Emotion Wheel from a young age. That foundation became life-saving when, at just 14 years old, he was hit with the emotional weight of his mother’s cancer diagnosis. Now 16, Asher reflects on how this tool has carried him through high school pressures, football struggles, panic attacks, and family conflicts—and even how he uses it with his girlfriend to build a safe, honest relationship. His story proves that emotional intelligence isn’t just for adults—no one is too young to learn it—and that authentic communication and safe spaces for vulnerability can transform every relationship, from family to friendships to future partnerships.Chapters:(00:00:00) Introduction & Disclaimer(00:02:59) Meet Asher(00:05:14) Why Asher is on the Podcast(00:06:59) Early Memories of Connection Codes(00:08:06) Cousin Conflict(00:10:38) The "Three Sentences" Rule(00:12:56) The Core Emotion Wheel as a "Game Changer"(00:15:56) Learning as We Go(00:19:12) A Cousin-Led Resolution(00:21:44) Navigating a Mother's Illness(00:26:28) Emotional Suppression as a Coping Mechanism(00:27:32) Inhale, Exhale: The Flow of Emotions(00:29:07) The Gym Analogy for Emotions(00:30:44) The Weight of Unprocessed Feelings(00:36:11) Asher's Core Emotion Wheel(00:38:23) Using the Wheel in a RelationshipLinks and Resources:Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠⁠⁠

In this heartfelt episode, we explore the transformative power of vulnerability in personal growth. Join us as Hannah Droll shares her journey of embracing vulnerability through Connection Codes, revealing how it reshaped her relationships and self-awareness. Discover the challenges and triumphs of staying present in moments of emotional intensity, and learn how vulnerability can lead to deeper connections and personal transformation. Tune in to uncover the profound impact of being open and authentic in your own life.

What if processing emotions could be simple, kind, and transformative? In this conversation, Dr. Glenn sits down with Jonathan Hernandez — psychology student, Certified Connection Codes Coach, and creative visionary bringing the Connection Codes to nearly a billion Spanish speakers. Speaking from his own dating relationship, Jonathan shares how processing emotions like fear, joy, and shame without judgment has deepened connection and reduced conflict — and how these same tools are transforming marriages around the world. Together, they explore why emotions “happen to us,” how resisting them keeps us stuck, and practical ways to experience emotional safety in real time. Whether you’re dating, married, or somewhere in between, this episode offers hope, humor, and actionable insight for anyone ready to strengthen their emotional health and relationships.Links and Resources:Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠⁠Jonathan Hernandez on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/jonathan-hernandez-b16070188⁠Chapters: 00:00:00 - Welcome & Why This Conversation Matters00:00:38 - Finding Joy in Fully Feeling00:01:35 - Meet Jonathan Hernandez & His Mission00:03:13 - The Moment Connection Codes Changed Everything00:07:22 - How Emotions Shape Every Connection00:10:50 - Processing Feelings That Once Felt Impossible00:21:06 - Turning Shame into a Bridge for Closeness00:24:34 - Trauma Responses and the Path to Healing00:27:23 - Experiencing Emotions in a Whole New Way00:28:43 - Using Emotional Processing to Truly Heal00:29:55 - Why Sadness Deserves a Seat at the Table00:32:09 - Applying Connection Codes in Real-Life Dating00:42:20 - Bringing Connection Codes to Millions of Spanish Speakers00:48:02 - The Transformative Power of Emotional Coaching00:49:58 - Walking Through the Emotional Wheel in Action

After 30 days apart, Tera and Wes Wages reunite in this raw and reflective episode to walk through the Core Emotion Wheel—live and unscripted. They process everything from the guilt of missed connections to the joy of being truly seen, showing just how powerful emotional honesty can be. Along the way, they model how to use this tool in real-time, talk through what’s really driving their behavior, and explain how diving deeper into core emotions has helped them move from disconnection to intimacy. If you've ever felt stuck in surface-level conversations, this episode shows how to break through and build meaningful connection—one emotion at a time.Links and Resources:Download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@connectioncodes?si=phORYBsGMOOrj9mA⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out how to become a Certified Coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/certified-coaching⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find a coach:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://connectioncodes.co/coaches#find-a-coach-menu⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Chapters: 00:00:00 - Welcome, Warm-Up & Quick Heads-Up00:00:49 - Summer Stories & Reuniting on the Mic00:01:10 - Unlocking Connection with the Core Emotion Wheel00:03:33 - Putting the Wheel to Work in Real Life00:05:24 - Peeling Back Layers: Emotions That Shape Relationships00:12:00 - Wes Opens Up: Honest Feelings on the Table00:17:14 - Big Life Shift: Saying Goodbye to the RV00:18:41 - The Emotional Weight of Letting Go00:19:08 - Adventures, Solitude, and Summer Reflections00:20:06 - Joy, Dreams, and What’s Next00:20:35 - Breaking Down the Core Eight Emotions00:22:02 - Chasing Parks, Memories, and Milestones00:23:37 - Why Our Feelings Drive the Choices We Make00:30:52 - The Highs and Hiccups of Life on the Road00:33:04 - How Core Emotions Keep Us Connected00:35:06 - Final Encouragement & Invitation to Join the Conversation