ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show

"Money is an opportunity to reach unity in marriage. When couples work together they can do anything." —Dave Ramsey You have probably heard the quote, "You should never talk about money, politics or religion." Now, this might be true if you are at a dinner party and yet... You are taking this stance when it comes to money in your marriage. There is no connection, discussion, or even a conversation about your money. If you are honest with yourselves there is no plan for your money. Without a plan or even conversations about money matters you feel stressed, have anxiety and live in a place of fear. No matter if you are: Newlyweds. New parents. Buying a house. In a job transition. College planning. Looking at retirement. Having to deal with medical needs. Your money matters and needs the two of you to have a plan for it. Right now you may be in crisis and need an immediate plan. Let's get started now so you can experience financial freedom. Maybe you are ready to go to the next level, now is the time for you to be thinking about those advisors and planners that you need to have in your life Hopefully you are doing great and are thinking about what's next? It's time to discuss how can we be a blessing to others with what we have received. At each level being intentional is a game changer. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about the power that financial intimacy has to bring strength and unity to your marriage. Your money matters impact each area of intimacy. EPISODE SPONSOR | 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle Sometimes it can be hard to think of what to get your love... chocolates, lingerie, a night out. Each of these are great choices and yet what about something truly unique this year? What about something that extends Valentine’s Day beyond one day? Get the 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle NOW! Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Oils and Intimacy Facebook Group Financial Peace University Our Family Emergency List Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"So many people hear the words physical intimacy and think about sex. There are so many layers to being physically intimate with your spouse, choosing just one aspect shortchanges both of you." —Anonymous Touch is so important and yet touch in any form may be absent or inconsequential in your marriage at this time. This absence of touch or in the quality of the touch, leads to a feeling of being unwanted, unseen, undesired. It’s interesting that touch is often one of the first ways that you begin to express your interest in your spouse when you first met. Then you  start your lives together and before you know it touch is one of the first things to go. The most obvious absence of physical intimacy is a lack of sex. But it’s more than that. Right now you may be struggling with little to no physical intimacy of any form (hugs, kisses, cuddling, holding hands, etc). Without touch, without physical intimacy your marriage can feel like a relationship of roommates. It can feel like you are just sharing the same house and the same responsibilities but really have nothing that would differentiate yourselves as a married couple. The two of you need touch. Your bodies were designed for it. You were designed to fit together. You have to create opportunities to connect and you have to be intentional about doing so. In this week’s show Tony and Alisa talk about why physical touch is an important area of connection for you and your spouse. EPISODE SPONSOR | 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle Sometimes it can be hard to think of what to get your love... chocolates, lingerie, a night out. Each of these are great choices and yet what about something truly unique this year? What about something that extends Valentine’s Day beyond one day? Get the 7 Days of Sex Challenge Bundle NOW! Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"You define what is important to you by who you spend your time with." —Anonymous When you were dating there was no shortage of things to do or ways that you wanted to spend your time together. No matter where you were or what time of day it was you got creative. You would pick up on the smallest comments and run with it, turning that comment into an incredible adventure you would do together. And then... You begin living together, jobs, bills, volunteering and kids take up time you once had together. Date nights were the same every time and you both lost the excitement and anticipation of a fun time together. It's time for you to stop asking "What do you want to do?" when you are heading out on a date. Your marriage needs connection. As you plan out your dates this year: It’s about spending time together building memories. Learning what the other likes as interests change over time. It’s about getting out of your comfort zone. It’s about trying new things. Put yourself in your spouse’s world. Laugh. Overcoming fear. It's time to build a vibrant marriage instead of tolerating a stale one. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about how to answer that timeless question of what do we do together. EPISODE SPONSOR | Connect Like You Did When You First Met — Free Softcover Book Hidden inside this book you’ll discover how to have fun, deep and meaningful conversations so you can connect with you spouse again. Get started on your emotional intimacy journey with your own softcover copy of Connect Like You Did When You First Met: 101 Proven Questions for Couple PLUS 4 digital bonuses. Limited quantities available so get yours today. Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"When you forgive, you in no way change the past but you sure do change the future." —Bernard Meltzer The year started off with us discussing the importance of emotional intimacy in your marriage. This is how the two of you communicate and is the foundation for growth in the other five intimacies. How the two of you connect during both the good and tough times will make the difference. After last week's show we dealt with a tough time ourselves. There was a breakdown in emotional intimacy after the show that lead to distance and disconnect. What you do after the conflict can mean more than what happens during the conversation. Are you letting pride and ego stand in the way of you giving a sincere apology to your spouse? Is it an apology that you need to give? Or... Is it forgiveness that you need to ask for from your spouse. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the power an apology has on both of you when it comes to your emotional intimacy. EPISODE SPONSOR | HelloFresh HelloFresh is the meal kit delivery service that makes cooking fun, easy, and convenient! Each week HelloFresh creates new delicious recipes with step-by-step instructions designed to take around 30 minutes. For novices to seasoned home-cooks who are short on time HelloFresh sources the freshest ingredients, measured to the exact quantities needed so there’s no food waste.  Take $35 off your first week of deliveries when you enter promo code OEM. Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Connect Like You Did When You First Met -- Free Paperback Book Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Communication must be HOT...Honest, Open and Two Way." —Dan Oswald Do the two of you have time each week when you can connect with your thoughts and feelings?  We spent many years of our marriage, probably the first ten years with little to no emotional intimacy. We could talk about anything while we were dating and then after the ring and the wedding... crickets. It was easier to avoid confrontation. It was easier to stuff things inside. Why share your feeling to deal with deflection, tears and the silent treatment. Your emotional intimacy has become repetitive as you talk about the kids, groceries and sport schedules. You now look across the table at your spouse and wonder, what do we have in common? Why can’t we talk to each other? Why do we have to get in a fight over everything? The answer is that there is flat spot on your emotional wheel. If you have a flat tire on your car, you have to stop and take action. If you keep driving on a flat wheel you will destroy the tire and eventually ruin the alignment. The same thing is true of your marriage. If your emotional intimacy is running flat you are throwing the alignment of your marriage out of whack. It’s time to take action. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about taking the emotional intimacy in your marriage through honest, open and two way listening to the next level. EPISODE SPONSOR | Connect Like You Did When You First Met -- Free Softcover Book Hidden inside this book you'll discover how to have fun, deep and meaningful conversations so you can connect with you spouse again. Get started on your emotional intimacy journey with your own softcover copy of Connect Like You Did When You First Met: 101 Proven Questions for Couple PLUS 4 digital bonuses. Limited quantities available so get yours today. Other Resources: Download The Intimacy Wheel Now Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Think as BIG as you possibly can and base what you do, how you do it and who you do it with on succeeding at that level." —Gary Keller & Jay Papasan If the two of you don’t have a vision for 2017, it’s going to look a lot like 2016. As you look ahead you need to know what areas of your marriage you want to focus on? These areas include: Financial intimacy Physical intimacy Spiritual intimacy Recreational intimacy Emotional intimacy What would it take to take each of these intimacies to the next level? Extraordinary doesn’t happen overnight and yet with many baby steps put together you can get there. In the fall of 2008 we had a vision to do the 60 Days of Sex Challenge. The vision for our marriage was that something had to change. We needed a new direction and the first baby step was taken. Look at what has happened in your life because of this vision. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about taking your marriage to the next level in this new year. EPISODE SPONSOR | ONE Extraordinary Marriage’s Strategic Marriage Coaching It’s that time of year when you are thinking about getting physically fit. You're checking out gym memberships, making plans to eat healthy and drafting their new year’s resolutions to make this your fittest year ever. Make this the year that you work on getting relationally fit! Having a coach who will hold you accountable and help you work through your challenges will make all of the difference between repeating the cycles of the past and creating an extraordinary marriage. Learn more about coaching today. Other Resources: The ONE Thing Minter & Richter Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Traditions remind us to stop the busy cycle of life long enough to reconnect and build bonds." —Sabrina Beasley McDonald It’s important for the two of you to have your own night before Christmas or Christmas Day traditions. Something that you do together, a gift or an adventure that is about you as a couple. This is about the two of you as your own separate entity, separate from the kids and from your extended families. It’s that reminder that you and your spouse are a team. When you begin to think about starting a new tradition make sure it's something that you can do year after year. Traditions don't usually “just happen". The first year may and yet after that you have to be intentional about it. You're setting this up because traditions give a sense of continuity. Doing the same thing (or something similar) allows the two of you to anticipate that experience, to remember how you have done this in the past and how you might do it in the future. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the excitement you both can have the night before Christmas or on Christmas with some fun traditions. EPISODE SPONSOR | 11 Must Have Items for Your Bedroom With this FREE resource you can get creative with the gifts that you are going to put under the Christmas tree this year. No more wondering about what to get. Discover a hit-list of all the top items we’ve used in the last 20 years of marriage to ignite intimacy, connection and comfort in the most important room of all -- the bedroom! Grab your 11 Must Have Items Now. Other Resources: Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Right NOW is the most important moment in your life." —Gail Lynne Goodwin Another day comes to an end and you and your spouse are tired. Earlier in the day you both were romancing each other and had every intention to enjoy one another. But it's another night of you falling asleep even before you start foreplay and leaving you both frustrated with your sexual intimacy. There is much on your plates and yet it's time to prioritize your marriage so that you both enjoy your sexual intimacy. It means making choices about when you are going to be sexually intimate. There is no rule, no law, that states that sex is ONLY at the end of the day. It's time to change things up in your marriage and enjoy awake sex! Sex when you both are fully engaged and ready to experience the orgasms you desire for one another. Sex that is a bit loud, in a different position and a room brightened by the sun. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about how powerful it is to have sex when you are fully awake, not just going through the motions at the end of the day. EPISODE SPONSOR | 11 Must Have Items for Your Bedroom With this FREE resource you can get creative with the gifts that you are going to put under the Christmas tree this year. No more wondering about what to get. Discover a hit-list of all the top items we’ve used in the last 20 years of marriage to ignite intimacy, connection and comfort in the most important room of all -- the bedroom! Grab your 11 Must Have Items Now. Other Resources: 140 - Scheduling Sex 21 Ways to Initiate Sex with Your Spouse Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Sometimes all you do is smile. Move on with your day, hold back the tears and pretend everything is OK." —Anonymous The holiday season is a busy time of year. You are are pulled in many directions and feel overwhelmed with the responsibilities of job, family, kids, volunteering, Christmas parties, and everything else that is on your plate. It's a time when you may feel like there is too much going on and you’re holding on by a thread. And then your spouse asks you something like… What’s wrong with you? How are you doing? What's going on? Since everything is at the tipping point, you lock the true answer inside and simply say, “I’m Fine”. More often than not when you say, "I’m FINE", it’s usually a code word for I’m feeling broken in some area of my life. When you say "I’m Fine" you put a wall, an obstacle in your marriage. Then one of you checks out. Either you or your spouse.  I’m FINE leads to disconnect because you aren’t sharing what’s going on with you I’m FINE leads to resentment because you won’t let this person, YOUR SPOUSE, into your world. It's time to eradicate I'm Fine from your vocabulary. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the impact two words, I’m Fine, have on your marriage and your intimacy. EPISODE SPONSOR | He Zigs, She Zags: Get Your Communication on the Same Path The ability to talk to each other is vital to all areas of your marriage. Here's the thing...if there is unease when talking, tension or bickering you know the stress that it places on you. You're drained. It’s time to take control of the communication in your marriage. There is so much that is happening in your life each and every day that if you do not take the time to learn how to best connect with your spouse you are going to struggle for years to come. Grab He Zigs, She Zags Now! Other Resources: Oils & Intimacy Facebook Group 287 - The Impact of Tone and Timing 332 - Releasing Resentment Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"What do brushing your teeth, taking a shower and making time to shave all have in common? They all improve your chances in the bedroom." —Alisa DiLorenzo Interestingly enough we have never tackled the topic of personal hygiene, even though it’s something that we frequently discuss in our marriage. Things like morning breath, unshaven legs, and manscaping is what we're talking about. When you are aware of what works for you and for your spouse it makes a difference in your sexual intimacy. We have experienced this in our own marriage and have recently made a change to our personal hygiene that has benefited our marriage. There are a number of personal hygiene options you have. Some of them are: Shaving  Waxing Sugaring Facials Haircut Shower Bath Oils Taking time to care for yourself has a number of physical and mental benefits. In this week's show Tony and Alisa talk about the mental and physical benefits of personal hygiene for you and your spouse, especially in the bedroom. EPISODE SPONSOR | Engaged Marriage Intimacy Reignited Reigniting the spark in the bedroom doesn’t have to be difficult. In fact, there are simple techniques that work incredibly fast. And will continue to work (no matter how long you’ve been married). Plus they're proven to work... even if you're extremely busy. Having an amazing sex life with your spouse. One that your friends would be totally jealous of.And wonder how you keep the spark alive.All because you know the “secrets” to a loving and intimate marriage. Grab Intimacy Reignited Now! Other Resources: 7 *Merry* Days of Sex Challenge 19 Quick Questions That Will Rekindle Your Sex Life Mangroomer Ultimate Pro Body Groomer Fresh Balls Lotion Strategic Coaching Session with Alisa Support ONE Extraordinary Marriage by shopping at Amazon.com. Leave a review on iTunes | Submit a question | Call (858)876-5663 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices