Foreplay Radio – Couples and Sex Therapy

"Not tonight, I'm just too tired." If this phrase has echoed off your bedroom walls then this episode is for you! Life's demands, new baby, chronic illness, age are all reasons we have for being too tired. In fact, recent research touts just how important a good night's sleep is for our health to manage stress and reduce anxiety. What happens though, when you turn to your partner to initiate love-making and more often than not you meet their sleep mask or snores instead of their kisses and warmth? Join George and Laurie in this episode for a conversation around the need for sleep and sex! We discuss how we can be sensitive to our partner's need for rest and also when tiredness might be a sign of relationship disconnection.Check out our sponsors!Cozy Earth -- the most fantastic, softest, comfiest sheets you've ever slept on! Use the coupon code 'foreplay' to get 35% off site-wide!Uberlube -- Laurie has been a fan of Uberlube for years! Long before Foreplay was started. Their personal lubricants are ideal to make the sexual experience top notch! Use the code 'foreplay' to save 10%!Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you threatened by a vibrator? Maybe it's something you've been thinking about using or only using alone. Vibrators can play an important role in a couple's sex life but might bring up myriad emotions. You may worry that a vibrator means that you are a bad lover but we hope to reduce the stigma around sex toys! Most women do not orgasm through intercourse alone and using a vibrator to stimulate her clitoris may help her body get into the zone for an orgasm. As we hear from Laurie in this episode, "If you increase the amount of orgasm, it's better for everyone!." Join our hosts to learn: how to talk about using a vibrator as part of your love making, how to get started with a vibrator, and Laurie's recommendations!There is still time to register for our virtual couple's retreat, Great Love and Great Sex, happening on September 8th. Head to our website www.foreplayrst.com to sign up!Also please check out our sponsor ZocDoc! They have the medical referral you need, when you need it. Finding the right doctor (in the right area with the right insurance...) can be challenging. ZocDoc is your one-stop referral source that allows you to find the help you need!Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Everybody in a relationship needs to learn this! Join Laurie and George today as they discuss and teach an integral relationship skill, asking for what you need from your partner in a way that increases connection. Each individual in a relationship has their own set of longings. Expressing a longing in a vulnerable way is SCARY. It's scary because we fear a negative reaction from the person we love the most. That fear drives us to mask and express the longing in a more protected way. Instead of, "I miss you and I really want to spend time with you." We end up saying, "Oh, so you're going to be late again." And BAM, we are in a negative cycle. George and Laurie are experts at showing us how and why it goes wrong and the strategies to set it right. Make sure to download this episode and share it with your partner so you can both learn how to express your needs in a way that increases connection, emotional and sexual in your relationship today!Join us on September 8th at 9am EST for our virtual couples retreat, Great Love and Great Sex to learn more conflict resolution skills and keys to a more loving relationship and how to keep it hot after all these years!Check out our highlighted sponsor for this episode:Cozy Earth -- the most fantastic, softest, comfiest sheets you've ever slept on! Use the coupon code 'foreplay' to get 35% off site-wide!Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When our brain is in a threat response our view narrows and we typically only see our side. Relationship research shows that secure couples are able to find common ground in conflict and widen their perspective to include their partner. Holding opposing points of view helps to reduce the negative cycle as partners are able to understand, validate and provide empathy to one another. And we know that this can be SO HARD! Join George and Laurie for today's episode where they discuss and role play how to find and stay on common ground with your partner during conflict.Join us on September 8th at 9am EST for our virtual couples retreat, Great Love and Great Sex to learn more conflict resolution skills and keys to a more loving relationship and how to keep it hot after all these years!Check out our sponsor for this episode:Foria enhances your sex life with natural oils. These are absorbed into your skin and enhance the sexual experience. Their Awake & Arousal Oil and Sex Oil are great ways to have a better orgasm. Try it you'll like it! Use the link above or use the code 'foreplay' at checkout to get 20% off your first order.Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Who of our listeners wants a Full Bodied Orgasm? Join Laurie and George in this episode to learn all about the full bodied orgasm. A FBO is one that is felt throughout the entire body not just concentrated to the genitals. Laurie was recently interviewed and quoted in several publications, describing a full bodied orgasm and that it is in fact a real thing! This truly is the sex education you didn't get and men and women alike will want to listen to this episode to learn more about an orgasm that spreads throughout your entire body and some tips on how to make it happen. And don't worry if you've never had this happen before. We are firm advocates that all orgasms are good orgasms! Listeners, make sure you sign up for our Great Love and Great Sex virtual couples retreat happening on September 8th. Registration is open now on our website.Check out our sponsor for this episode:Uberlube -- Laurie has been a fan of Uberlube for years! Long before Foreplay was started. Their personal lubricants are ideal to make the sexual experience top notch! Use the code 'foreplay' to save 10%!Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In Episode #389 Laurie and George discuss common roles in couple's relationships around sex. Are you the partner that initiates or the receptive partner? Our hosts detail that there is no right or wrong to either of these roles but when stuck in a negative cycle, couples can easily pathologize their partner. "Oh, all they ever think about is sex. They just want to get off." Or, "They are so cold. If I don't bring it up we would never have it at all." If this sounds like something that happens in your relationship, then this is an episode you will want to download and share with your partner! Listen as George and Laurie, get into the minds of each partner and the valid reasons they do what they do. In a negative cycle, protection drives interactions and couples lack the ability to be understanding, empathetic and de-escalated to listen to their partner. Join us in learning more about initiating and receptive sex and think about this homework assignment from G: Thank my partner for the way they show up, take ownership of my move in the cycle and share that to one another.  Please check out our online couples retreat -- Great Love & Great Sex -- September 8, 2023!Also please check out our sponsor ZocDoc! They have the medical referral you need, when you need it. Finding the right doctor (in the right area with the right insurance...) can be challenging. ZocDoc is your one-stop referral source that allows you to find the help you need! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Boring is a signal and it's a sign that something needs to change! A complaint about monogamy is that the line between responsibility and desire often gets blurred and it is responsibility and safety that win out. Long-term couples come to therapy with a complaint that sex is predictable and had become boring. Join our hosts in this episode as they explore what might be lying under the surface. Are you simply disengaged from life? Or is there a relational dynamic that has caused a couple to disengage from desire and their ability to express desire to each other. Our hosts remind us that sex is an exciting adventure and the safety of a long-term partnership invites us to take even more risks. If you have been thinking that sex with your honey has been a little stale, you'll certainly want to download this episode. There is still time to take advantage of our early bird discount for our Great Love and Great Sex virtual couples retreat on September 8th. We hope to see you there!Check out our sponsor:Uberlube -- Laurie has been a fan of Uberlube for years! Long before Foreplay was started. Their personal lubricants are ideal to make the sexual experience top notch! Use the code 'foreplay' to save 10%! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this listener mailbag episode, Laurie and George receive a thoughtful question from a sexual withdrawer, asking help from our hosts. They notice that as their partner asks what they want in bed, they are often empty and unknowing of the response. George and Laurie work to honor the protection of emptiness that can be present for many sexual withdrawers. The experience of not knowing the self or the needs of the self has ties to early childhood or influential relationships where there was safety in disowning needs. They provide valuable insight on the protective position and tangible strategies for listeners. If you consider yourself a sexual withdrawer or are in a relationship with a sexual withdrawer this is an incredible episode to listen to, download and share! We welcome couples to join us on September 8th for our Great Love and Great Sex virtual couples retreat! We have a breadth of information to share for sexual pursuers and withdrawers.Check out our sponsors and support the podcast!Foria enhances your sex life with natural oils. These are absorbed into your skin and enhance the sexual experience. Their Awake & Arousal Oil and Sex Oil are great ways to have a better orgasm. Try it you'll like it! Use the link above or use the code 'foreplay' at checkout to get 20% off your first order. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

"Mistrust is part of the change process." We long for things to change, for the negative cycle to shift and for us to achieve closeness and connection but it is SO normal for blocks to occur during this time. Join Laurie and George in this episode learning about blocks to sexual connection, common blocks for pursuers and withdrawers and tools to use when a block occurs. Our hosts encourage us to predict the blocks and create a plan for repair, honor the function of the protection and get more comfortable in exploring the fear underneath. A key takeaway is that we become myopic during the cycle. Success in closeness is illustrated by predicting your partner's block, and being flexible to their underlying need.Check out our Sponsors:Uberlube - Laurie's long time favorite lubricant! She's been recommending Uberlube to her clients for years! Use the code 'foreplay' to get your discount!Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Can we ever get out of this place, this cycle? The answer is a resounding yes! Stage 1 in EFT works on de-escalating the negative cycle and creating more safety between partners. When there is safety to take the risk of expressing your longing that lives underneath the protection to your partner, lies the solution to creating a more secure relationship. In this episode Laurie and George, illustrate for listeners the sexual withdrawer's longings and how they can share them to their love. You'll want to listen to this episode for these tips: how to go into the feeling, the signals that your body gives to expose your fear, and how to ASK your partner for help. Sexual withdrawers may need: understanding, acceptance and reassurance. George and Laurie encourage us to be brave in these dark places because we are not supposed to be here alone! Make sure to sign up for our online couples retreat for all things Great Sex and Great Love happening on September 8th.And check out our sponsors:ZocDoc - Download this tremendous app to help you find the medical help you need, when you need it. No more having to figure out how to login to your insurance website to find a doctor or medical specialist. ZocDoc puts that all right at your fingertips! Use the code 'foreplay' so they know we sent you!Uberlube - Laurie's long time favorite lubricant! She's been recommending Uberlube to her clients for years! Use the code 'foreplay' to get your discount! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices