Practicing Polyamory Podcast

In this episode, Dr. Rachel Anne Kieran and I get a chance to chat about her journey through becoming a therapist for the polyam community, and her inspiration to be an ally and resource to those in need. We talk about the history of psychology with regard to polyamory, non-monogamy, LGBTQ+ issues, and kink, and how important it is that the therapists we seek do not automatically pathologize us for our relationship styles. Dr. Kieran shares her insights on intersectionality, including recognizing her privilege when engaged with clients, and we talk about our internal intersections, too. She gives some great examples of how we might struggle with our own intersecting personalities, and gives some tips on how to address our own needs. When it comes to leaning into difficult conversations, Rachel talks about the conversations we need to have on both micro and macro levels, and we talk about why it's important for us to have these conversations not just within our personal relationships, but with the world at large. Learn more about Dr. Rachel Anne Kieran at www.rkieranpsyd.com, and follow her on FB: @drkieran !

In this guest-less episode, I tell the story of my first polyam relationship back in 2017 and the struggles I faced while navigating my first relationship. I talk about some of the mistakes I made including treating my partner as disposable, downplaying my feelings with my other partner, and allowing couples privilege and hierarchy to guide many of my decisions. I also talk about the importance of self-care, and how allowing myself to feel my emotions and release them helped me heal. Want to share your imperfect story? Go to www.practicingpolyamory.com and sign up today, and follow everywhere @practicingpolya!

In this episode I get to chat with Karine Bedard, a Bible school graduate who found her faith shaken when her husband, a fellow Bible school graduate and her first love, began to question his. Karine shares her story of finding Playboy Radio and how the authentic stories of the people on that channel resonated with her more than the superficial connections she typically found at her church.  And so began her journey in Breaking Free, which is how she found her true and authentic community. Karine's story of conscious uncoupling with her husband, and hear how the lessons she's learned in polyamory has helped her maintain a good friendship with her ex was especially good, and I love how this conversation led us to talking about how polyamory allows us the freedom to explore relationships authentically, and without limits. Learn more about Karine at www.karinebedardcoaching.com and follow her on IG: @karinebedardcoaching !

In this follow-up episode (check E.84 for part 1) with Olivia Fermi, I've done my homework and spent time talking with my Tias and my Mom about their experiences in coming to America. I share those stories and Olivia guides me into making the personal connection with my heritage. I recount the story of my family's deportation as children and their early struggles of trying to make a life in America, and we follow the path of their journey to discover how much work, toil, and sacrifice led to me being able to live my life as I know it today. I also get a chance to share the lessons I learned while talking to my friend Tavo, and how assimilation can be weaponized against marginalized communities. I'm so grateful to Olivia for guiding me through this process of learning how important it is to connect with my heritage, so that I can better understand others and do a better job of creating inclusive communities wherever I go. Learn more about Olivia at www.fermi.ca and follow her on IG: @olivia_fermi !

James Sias, a polyamory advocate, shares his journey from possessive to open-minded. He discusses his early struggles, the pressure to find 'The One,' and how practicing polyamory shattered his loneliness. He reflects on personal growth and overcoming jealousy, finding support from multiple partners, and the transformative power of polyamory. James also highlights the positive impact on friendships and contrasts it with difficulties in monogamous relationships.

In this episode we get to hear a very real, raw, and unfiltered story from someone in our polyam community who has seen her share of ups and downs through her poly journey. Sharon talks us through some of her experiences, including being neglected by her previous husband who perhaps had too many partners. Sharon shares with us how she's learned to set boundaries and expectations in new relationships to make sure that doesn't suffer that neglect again. Sharon feels that she sometimes leans toward monogamy, and although she acknowledges that one person may not meet all needs, we talk about how she reconciles those feelings with her polyamorous journey. We get into some pretty good discussion around rules and hierarchical relationships, too, since Sharon and her current husband do maintain a hierarchy and have worked through opening their relationship at a slow and measured pace. Tune in to hear the imperfect story of someone who is navigating a semi-mono-poly relationship, healing trauma, and making space for love to grow while making concessions to protect her own heart. Thanks for hanging out, Sharon!

Tara Lynne Franco and Andre Turcotte, a coach and therapist duo, share how they help people change their mindsets by asking new questions. They discuss specific experiences, the power of question-storming, and their approach to helping those who have lost their way find themselves again.

I had a cancellation a week before this interview was scheduled, so I tweeted out a call (trying to be more actively inclusive) to the QTBIPOC community to fill that spot. When no one answered the call, I asked myself...have a created a space where all folx feel safe? I expressed my concern to my mailing list, and Olivia Fermi asked me such introspective questions that I knew this was a good place for me to start this journey. Join me as I learn what it takes to create a safe and inclusive space here on the podcast. My hope is that you'll take what you learn to create safe spaces wherever you are, too! Tune in for part II (episode 88), and learn more about Olivia at https://fermi.ca and follow her @olivia_fermi !

Today's guest in an awesome therapist from Michigan, Heather Shannon. After getting to know her a bit and find out why she is inspired to help people in non-monog/non-traditional relationships, we dive into how she might approach a client as a coach versus as a therapist. We get some great insight into how Heather might help someone who is feeling lost or directionless, and then dive into some of what she's seen and her thought process when polyamory magnifies insecurities and relationship problems. Heather gives a great explanation about attachment styles, and how they might help someone get to the root of jealousy and possessiveness. We round out the conversation by talking about the importance and value of self-care and self-reliance, and finding the space where we can be both vulnerable and trusting and able to love openly and deeply, while still taking care of and protecting ourselves. I had such a great time chatting with Heather and getting to learn from her experiences and share my own. I hope you gain as much value from this conversation as I did! For more information go to https://heathershannon.co and follow @HeatherAShannon !

After a brief introduction and learning about Taryn's background, we start by diving into Simone Biles' decision to remove herself from Olympics competition due to mental health reasons. I have a little bit to say about the "devil's advocate" perspective, but overall it's a chance to hear a therapist's perspective on that decision, and how self-care is important to all of us!  Most of us aren't even at the highest levels of competition like Simone, but we all have expectations of ourselves and it's important to give ourselves grace! Some of Taryn's expertise is helping people navigate kink, so we talk about how to bring that topic to overcome shame and have that conversation with your partner, and what to do when that conversation doesn't go so well. If you want to know how to take an active role in your therapy, how to know when therapy is working, and when it might be time to switch therapists, be sure to stick around to the end! Learn more about Taryn by following on Facebook @BelleTowerGroup !