Gentle Power

In this week’s episode, Gerta sits down with her father, Arben Malaj, for a candid conversation about leadership under pressure, values-based negotiation, and what it looks like to take responsibility when everything is on the line. Arben is a prominent public figure in Albania and served as Minister of Finance during the country’s 1997 economic collapse, when pyramid schemes wiped out roughly half of Albania’s GDP and pushed the country into chaos.This is part one of the interview, focusing on Arben’s background, the crisis years, and the negotiation principles that guided him through some of the most turbulent moments in Albania’s modern history.Our conversation covers:From limited education under communism to winning high-stakes negotiationsWhat happens when governments fail to act and how trust, power, and responsibility collideBeing asked to lead during a national crisisWhy integrity, sincerity, and goodwill matter more than leverage in high-stakes negotiationsLessons on leadership that translate far beyond politics and into everyday decision-makingWe’ll continue this conversation in part two, where we go deeper into negotiations, international diplomacy, and the long-term lessons from rebuilding after collapse.For more:Book free consultation call with Alex: CalendlyGet our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.comRead our weekly newsletter: NewsletterInstagram: @yournegotiationsLinkedIn: Gerta | Alex

This week, we talk about a type of negotiation most people deal with far more often than job offers: negotiating with hotels, airlines, and everyday services. The conversation was sparked by a real hotel booking situation that arose from Gerta’s upcoming MIT masterclass.Our conversation covers:Why everyday negotiations still benefit from a clear askHow light preparation works better than rigid scriptsHow human connection plays a role in low-stakes negotiationsWhat creativity looks like when you are not extracting valueWhy small acts of generosity can go a long wayThis week’s conversation reminds us that clarity, kindness, and genuine engagement often outperform clever tactics in every situation, not just high-stakes conversations.For more:Book free consultation call with Alex: CalendlyGet our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.comRead our weekly newsletter: NewsletterInstagram: @yournegotiationsLinkedIn: Gerta | Alex

This week, we’re sharing Gerta’s interview with Meredith Baker of the Powerful Stuff Podcast, a podcast for cheeky self-development. Their conversation is a refreshing reminder that negotiation doesn’t have to feel like a cage match. Gerta breaks down the mindset that makes negotiation work better (collaboration, goodwill, and even playfulness), plus a handful of tactics you can use immediately, whether you’re navigating comp, co-founder equity, rent, or just everyday life.Our conversation covers:What can negotiators learn from decision science and poker?How to decide whether to negotiate? Expected value and resulting.Why negotiation works best when it’s collaborative, not when you play “hard to get”The first step most people skip: clarifying priorities and non-negotiablesWhy you shouldn’t give the first number in job offer conversationsThe power of silence, time, and not pushing for answers on the spotEveryday negotiations you’re need to try: rent, flights, seats, even concert ticketsFor more:Book free consultation call with Alex: CalendlyGet our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.comRead our weekly newsletter: NewsletterInstagram: @yournegotiationsLinkedIn: Gerta | Alex

Most weeks on Gentle Power, we talk about power dynamics in professional settings like job offers and negotiations. In this episode, we focus on negotiations in none other than… love and dating! We explore how vulnerability, power dynamics, and behavioral psychology shape connection and influence, often in ways people misunderstand.Our conversation covers:Vulnerability feels like weakness but it’s actually a strong marker of power People will like you more if you ask them for a favor - the Ben Franklin effectHow to tell if someone likes you by looking at their body languageHow to regain power when the other party is being aggressive For more:Book free consultation call with Alex: CalendlyGet our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.comRead our weekly newsletter: NewsletterInstagram: @yournegotiationsLinkedIn: Gerta | Alex

This week we sat down with our friend Victor Hsu, a New York - based real estate broker who works with global families, primarily Chinese, navigating the U.S. housing market. Victor’s perspective blends cultural nuance, decades of on-the-ground experience, and a front-row view into how real people behave when the stakes feel high. The overlap between real estate and hiring negotiations turned out to be even greater than we expected.Our conversation covers:How Victor’s client negotiated over $3M off the asking price of a Manhattan townhouseWhy showing enthusiasm from Day 1 can make sellers more flexible, not lessWhat great real estate agents actually do behind the scenesPractical tips for buyers in today’s market and renters in competitive citiesFind out what he meant by ““Making offers is how you get intel”.For more:Book free consultation call with Alex: CalendlyGet our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.comRead our weekly newsletter: NewsletterInstagram: @yournegotiationsLinkedIn: Gerta | Alex

Discover surprising insights as mid-career professionals often secure better negotiation gains than senior executives. Overconfidence can hurt those at the top, leading to hasty decisions. Executives frequently reveal too much too soon, losing critical leverage. Tactics like calibrated naivete can enhance rapport, while the scarcity of high-level roles pressures leaders to accept suboptimal terms. The balance between transparency and tactical silence is crucial in negotiations. Learn how to negotiate effectively and avoid common pitfalls that might cost you.

This week we spoke with our friend Matt LeBaron, cofounder and CEO of Pocketbook. Matt helps large companies evaluate their software vendors, renegotiate contracts, and make smarter decisions about their tech stack. He also works as a part-time consultant with Adobe’s software procurement team.Our conversation covers:How Matt creatively turned a full-time job posting from Adobe into part-time client work for his businessWhy negotiations are more flexible than they appear, and how stated policies or pricing often function more as starting points than strict rulesHow timing, context, and business needs contribute to negotiation leverageWhy relationships matter more than negotiations tactics taught in the classroom or in booksWhether you’re a freelancer, you have your own business, or are a job seeker who’s having trouble finding that perfect role to apply to, you’ll find a ton of gold in this conversation with Matt.Learn more about Matt and Pocketbook here: Website | Matt’s LinkedIn | email: matt@pocketbk.com For more:Book free consultation call with Alex: CalendlyGet our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.comRead our weekly newsletter: NewsletterInstagram: @yournegotiationsLinkedIn: Gerta | Alex

This week on Gentle Power, we’re joined by Shawna Samuel, an executive consultant who focuses on supporting executive-working mothers in demanding roles. Shawna began her career in global finance, where she spent two decades shaping partnerships across the US and Europe. When she became a mother, the structure that had supported her career started to feel less stable. Her responsibilities grew while the available support didn’t grow with them, and she began questioning the default assumption that people should simply adapt without help. That turning point led Shawna to create The Mental Offload, where she helps clients reclaim time, influence, and steadiness in both their professional and personal lives without sacrificing career trajectory.This conversation will be valuable to anyone who is career-focused but also has big responsibilities outside of the office.Our conversation covers:How to frame your asks around the business value you create rather than treating adjustments as favorsWhy silence can be a powerful tool and how to use it to guide a negotiationPracticing saying no in small, everyday ways so that boundaries shift from feeling uncomfortable to normalWhy people do better work when the responsibilities they carry outside of the office are acknowledged and supportedLearn more about Shawna and The Mental Offload here: Website | Spotify | Apple | LinkedInFor more:Book free consultation call with Alex: CalendlyGet our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.comRead our weekly newsletter: NewsletterInstagram: @yournegotiationsLinkedIn: Gerta | Alex

This week on Gentle Power, we explore how Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy has changed the way we think about negotiations. The IFS school of thought is based on the idea that we all have different “parts” within us that try to protect us in different ways, and this framework offers surprising lessons for how we show up in high-stakes conversations.Our conversation covers:Why curiosity works better than confrontation when someone gets pushy or defensiveHow to stay grounded when you feel triggered or under pressureWhy advocating for your younger self (or for someone you care about) makes it easier to ask for moreThe link between self-awareness and business confidence, and why not negotiating can send the wrong signalHow responding with kindness helps you maintain your power while also getting a better outcome Negotiating from this mindset will feel less like a flight and more like a creative dialogue. When we understand our own reactions and stay curious about what’s happening on the other side, even tough moments can turn into opportunities for connection and confidence, and of course, better outcomes.For more:Book free consultation call with Alex: CalendlyGet our free negotiation worksheet: YourNegotiations.comRead our weekly newsletter: NewsletterInstagram: @yournegotiationsLinkedIn: Gerta | Alex

Negotiation can be tricky, and often we give away our power without realizing it. Sharing salary history? That's a quick way to anchor yourself low. Companies might coax you into revealing info they shouldn't ask for. Market data is not as reliable as it seems; knowing the true budget is crucial. Even small financial missteps can compound over time, impacting future earnings. And be cautious with personal disclosures—like talking about other offers or personal plans—as these can undermine your leverage.