Get Your Marriage On! with Dan Purcell

Do you ever wish your husband would take more initiative in the bedroom? Our podcast this week is all about masculine leadership within the bedroom (please note: this is not to diminish or replace feminine leadership).   GS Youngblood is an author and coach for men. GS teaches how important being grounded, taking the lead, and responding rather than reacting is within your marriage.   I hope you learn something from GS, as I know I did!   #getyourmarriageon #marriagepodcast #relationshippodcast #sexcoachpodcast #christiansexpodcast

I’ve learned that intimacy problems can creep into the marriage because of unrealistic expectations and patterns of avoiding the issue. Whether it’s performance anxiety, body image issues, or even a sexless marriage, you can break out of your patterns that keep you stuck by getting a clearer understanding of your dynamic.   I’m honored to have Braxton Dutson on the podcast today to talk about what to do when you find yourself in a marriage where sex is not as satisfying.   Braxton Dutson is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and certified sex therapist (CST) through AASECT. He hosts the sexual health podcast called Birds and Bees Podcast which provides education for couples and parents about sexual health topics to improve their relationships with each other and have sexual health conversations with their children.   If that wasn’t enough, Braxton is an adjunct professor of human sexuality at the University of Utah college of social work.

Experiencing pain with sex is, unfortunately, all too common for many women. According to one peer-reviewed study I read out of Australia, 20% of women regularly experience pain with sex. Other research suggests that just about every woman at one point in their life will experience pain with sex. But sex shouldn’t be painful. There are tons of resources and therapies out there to make sex better for everyone.  Today I have as my guest Dr. Rose Schlaff. She’s a pelvic floor physical therapist and sex nerd that specializes in helping women enjoy sex and heal from painful sex. In this episode, we do a deep dive into what causes pain with sex, the different types of pain, and what you can do to heal from it to make sex great for you and your spouse. For more information about Dr. Schlaff visit the following: Website: https://www.bewellwithrose.com/ Instagram: @bewellwithrose Free Guide Mentioned in Episode: www.bewellwithrose.com/guide

Let’s get one thing out of the way first — dirty talk isn’t dirty. It’s actually an intimate form of communication to let your spouse into your heart and mind. It’s a way to express the erotic part of you with your lover. It’s about using your words to arouse. The nice thing about married sex is that it’s a place you can go where things don’t have to be so cleaned up. You can be less formal with each other and use language with each other you wouldn’t use in another context – creating more arousal, intimacy and excitement. If “talking dirty” (and I put that in air quotes) is something you’ve always found awkward or have no idea where to start, you’re in for a treat! This episode with Melanie Studley will hopefully help you and your lover discover a new way to draw closer together and have some sexy fun! For more information, check out our tasteful, comprehensive, step-by-step guide to increase connection with your spouse through erotic conversations, or "dirty talk." This 40-page guide has something for both brand new, hesitant sexy talkers and those who may be a little more experienced. Use the included worksheets and game suggestions to explore new vocabulary and increase the connection, passion, and fun in your marriage!

Abuse of any kind, whether it’s physical, emotional, or sexual, is evil and wrong. Sexual abuse is particularly harmful because our sexuality is so personal to us. There is often some shame around our sexuality anyway, and the abuser takes advantage of it to make us feel less worthy.   But healing is possible! If abuse is part of your story, I hope today’s episode gives you hope.   Today’s guest is Nicole Graf. She’s a champion for sexy & intimate marriages as well as a Christ follower. She’s a certified Stress Management Consultant, has a degree in psychology and helps others overcome sexual abuse and find healing & hope.   Something that stood out to me a lot in this interview with Nicole is just the power of forgiveness and gratitude. Like those two themes just came up over and over and over for me and how important it is to get outside help and to have a really good, solid education on what really is supposed to be and not supposed to be.   And the value of good role models. There's so much goodness, in this episode, I hope you listened to the very end and learn a lot from it just as I did. @nakedheartcoach

I am so excited to talk about today’s topic!  The idea for this podcast episode was partially inspired by an upcoming podcast episode I’ll be releasing in a few weeks. I interviewed an author, GS Youngblood.  His tip was about how foreplay begins the moment your past sexual encounter ends, and that foreplay should be done throughout the day not immediately before sexual intercourse. I’ve thought a lot about foreplay and I have been more intentional about making foreplay great in my marriage. Today I want to share a few ideas that I’ve learned from my own experience and from others that I admire about meaningful foreplay in sex.  Now, let’s talk about what foreplay is, how to do it right, why some couples may struggle with foreplay, and end with some specific, actionable things you can do right away to make better foreplay an amazing and rewarding part of your marriage.

There are so many parallels between money and intimacy when it comes to marriage. For many people, money represents security. When money issues creep up, it can threaten our ability to trust our spouse.   Issues revolving around spending habits in a marriage can add a lot of stress to the relationship. We also bring to a marriage two different world views on money, creating an opportunity for growth – requiring both people to lean in to each other and get more honest with each other throughout the process.   Today I interview Juli and Thomas from Marriage Puzzle. They are marriage coaches who help others overcome pain points around money, intimacy, and communication so that they can go from feeling overwhelmed to feeling secure in their marriage.

You’re about to meet my guests on today’s episode, Zach and Darcy Spafford.  Zach used to struggle with habitual pornography use and Darcy struggled with trying to figure out what to do with her feelings of hurt and mistrust.  After applying certain tools and committing to serious growth together, they’ve not only overcome but are now thriving together in their relationship, as you’ll see! They now host a podcast titled: The Self Mastery Podcast: Overcome Pornography Whether or not porn use is part of your story in your marriage, I hope you learn as much as I did from Zach and Darcy’s courage and the action they took! You might also be interested in my Life After Pornography App!

Initiating sex can be a very powerful way to communicate love and desire to your spouse. Initiating is a powerful bid for connection. It’s a way of saying, “I want to connect with you.” Initiating can be very intimate. And it’s very validating to be wanted sexually. To prepare for this episode, I ran an informal survey of our Instagram followers to get a better idea of what other couples struggle with when it comes to initiating. The answers were enlightening and I saw several patterns in the responses.  I hope you find this episode just as insightful! Enjoy.

I'm interested in doing a podcast episode primarily for men about understanding intimacy, especially if it wasn't modeled in your home growing up. To be clear, I don't mean “intimacy” as a euphemism for sex. I mean Intimacy as in relational closeness: a willingness to know and be fully known by your spouse. Many men struggle to get emotionally close to their spouse. They confuse intimacy with sex. They think showing emotion is a sign of weakness (with the exception of anger). I don’t know how accurate this is, but I once heard this cliver quip about how men want to penetrate their wives sexually and women want to penetrate their husbands emotionally. Yet so many men have never learned how to let another person into their heart. Today I interview Dr. Randell Turner, who’s done a lot of research and ministry around teaching men intimacy skills. He’s got an interesting story that you might relate to as well!