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Meikles & Dimes

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Mar 4, 2024 • 17min

123: The World’s Longest Study of Happiness | Marc Schulz

Marc Schulz is the associate director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, an 85-year study of individuals and families. He is also the author of The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness. Marc earned an undergraduate degree from Amherst College and a Ph.D. from California Berkeley. In this episode we discuss the following: The Harvard Study of Adult Development has followed more than 2,000 people spanning more than 85 years. The one finding that stands out above all others: Relationships keep us happier and healthier through our lives.  Relationships help us navigate stress, overcome challenges, deal with emotions, figure out our path, and connect us with our past. Relationships are also where we experience our most joy, and they also predict our health and happiness. The risk of mortality associated with loneliness is about the same as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. One of the biggest problems with loneliness is that it’s quite prevalent. In the United States, in a given week, 20-50% of adults report being lonely. Given that loneliness is as damaging to health as smoking 15 cigarettes/day, the surgeon general talks about this is a public health crisis. In the past, people had to get out of their house to see whether the Jones’s where better off than them. But now we can socially compare ourselves from our phones. And most of us come out of those comparisons feeling worse about ourselves. By going more virtual and focusing on efficiency we miss out on informal connections, like talking to people in the hallway. Just as physical fitness is important predictor of health and happiness, so too is social fitness. By thinking about our social lives in terms of what’s working, and then prioritizing our positive social relationships, we can improve our happiness. When people in their 80s discuss their regrets, most regrets are centered on relationships. For example, losing contact with friends, or not being as kind as they could have been to the people they loved. Social fitness is all about making time for our friends and loved ones. Eating lunch with them, going on walks with them, or calling them. As the key finding from the 85-year Harvard Study of Adult Development shows, relationships keep us happier and healthier through our lives.   Follow Marc LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marc-schulz-20663222a/ Website: https://www.brynmawr.edu/inside/people/marc-schulz The Good Life Book: https://amzn.to/41ShAe3 Follow Me: X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nate_meikle/ Website: https://natemeikle.com
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Feb 26, 2024 • 18min

122: Andy Reid on Leadership

Andy Reid's leadership qualities are praised by his star players, who credit him for their success. From lessons learned from role models to staying calm under pressure, Andy's leadership style is discussed. The importance of honesty, trust, consistency, and genuine care for players is highlighted as key factors in effective leadership.
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Feb 19, 2024 • 19min

121: Zoe Chance on Reducing the Asking Gap

Zoe Chance, Yale lecturer and author of the international bestseller, INFLUENCE IS YOUR SUPERPOWER, studies persuasion, decision making, and how people can lead happier, healthier, more fulfilling lives. At Yale, Zoe teaches one of Yale’s most popular classes, Mastering Influence and Persuasion. She also collaborates with Google and Optum Health. Prior to her engagement at Yale, Zoe marketed a $200 million segment of the Barbie brand at Mattel and developed an executive education leadership program at Harvard. Her research has been covered in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Economist, Scientific American, Psychology Today, Financial Times, and Discover. Zoe received her doctorate from Harvard, MBA from the University of Southern California, and bachelor’s degree from Haverford College. In this episode we discuss the following: Those who had advantages were seven times more likely to ask for help than those who didn’t. But, if we help those who ask and don’t seek out and support those who don’t ask for help, we further perpetuate inequality. By developing policies with an eye towards helping those who are less likely to ask for help, we can help level the playing field. A lot of privilege in this world is a result of asking for help. But when we help those who ask for help, we can unintentionally perpetuate the Asking Gap, as we help those who already have more privilege. An employee who had just had a child was struggling to keep up with work. So, she asked to work remotely. The manager, being kind, agreed. But the two previous mothers who had just given birth, but hadn’t asked to work remotely, were short changed. So, the company created a policy allowing all mothers the same benefit. To reduce the Asking Gap, Zoe automatically grants a two-day extension to anyone who asks. All they have to do is send an email to an email address which automatically responds with the extension. Follow Zoe X: https://twitter.com/zoebchance LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/zoebchance/ Website: https://www.zoechance.com/ Book: INFLUENCE IS YOUR SUPERPOWER, Follow Me: X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nate_meikle/ Website: https://natemeikle.com
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Feb 12, 2024 • 15min

120: NYU Professor Dolly Chugh on Bounded Ethicality

Dolly Chugh is an award-winning psychologist at New York University. She studies how and why most of us, however well-intended, are still prone to race and gender bias, as well as what she calls “bounded ethicality.” Dolly’s work has been covered on the TODAY Show, the Wall Street Journal, the New York Times, the Atlantic, The goop Podcast, NPR, Dr. Phil, and other media outlets. And Dolly’s TED Talk was named one of the 25 Most Popular TED Talks of 2018 and currently has more than 5 million views. Prior to becoming an academic, Dolly worked at Morgan Stanley, Merrill Lynch, and Time Inc. Dolly earned a psychology and economics degree from Cornell University and an MBA, M.A. and PhD from Harvard. In this episode we discuss the following: Just as our brains are limited in how quickly they can process and store information (bounded rationality), our brains are also limited when it comes to ethical decision making (bounded ethicality). By using systems, we can safeguard ourselves against some of our biases. So, for example, rather than just hiring for fit, and possibly perpetuating inequality, we can formalize the hiring system and hire for behavioral competencies. Just as we need financial literacy to understand finance and how to invest, we also need psychological literacy to understand ethics and how to behave ethically. Follow Dolly: Website: https://www.dollychugh.com/ X: https://twitter.com/DollyChugh LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dolly-chugh/ Book: https://amzn.to/4aPkPHh Follow Me: X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nate_meikle/
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Feb 5, 2024 • 16min

119: Stanford Professor Bob Sutton | The Best Leaders Are Trustees of Others’ Time

Stanford Professor Bob Sutton emphasizes the importance of leaders being trustees of others' time. He shares a story about the California DMV's efficient process. The podcast discusses the benefits of adopting a subtraction mindset to maximize efficiency and the role of love in workplace dynamics and healthcare operations. Examples from CEOs and companies showcase the positive outcomes of removing friction and prioritizing customer needs.
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Jan 29, 2024 • 22min

118: Huggy Rao | Remove Obstacles that Infuriate. Insert Obstacles that Educate.

Hayagreeva "Huggy" Rao, professor at Stanford University, is the author of several bestselling books, including his most recent, with co-author Bob Sutton, The Friction Project. His books have been covered in the Wall Street Journal, Financial Times, Inc. Magazine, Amazon, Forbes, and Washington Post among others. Huggy has also consulted with organizations such as British Petroleum, CEMEX, General Electric, IBM, Mass Mutual, American Cancer Society, the FBI and CIA. In this episode we discuss the following: Whether leaders are wasting others’ time or underestimating coordination problems, they are creating bad friction that leads people to say things like, “After pouring myself into my BS work each day, I only have scraps of myself for my family.” Not all friction is bad. Creating friction for the Oakland Police Department led to less African Americans and Latinos being unjustly stopped. A leader has two primary jobs: remove obstacles that infuriate. And insert obstacles that educate. Follow Huggy X: https://twitter.com/huggyrao LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hayagreevarao/ Website: https://huggyrao.com/ The Friction Project Book: https://amzn.to/48BVX3I Follow Me: X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nate_meikle/ Website: https://natemeikle.com
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Jan 22, 2024 • 20min

117: Dan Heath | Bright Spots as a Superpower

Dan Heath is the co-author, with his brother Chip, of four New York Times bestsellers: Decisive, Switch, Made to Stick, and The Power of Moments. Their books have sold over 3 million copies and been translated into 33 languages. Dan is a Senior Fellow at Duke University’s CASE center, which supports social entrepreneurs. Previously, Dan worked as a researcher and case writer for Harvard Business School. In the late 1990s, Dan co-founded a publishing company called Thinkwell, which produces online college textbooks featuring video lectures from the country’s top professors. And one proud geeky moment for Dan was his victory in the 2005 New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest, beating out 13,000 other entrants. Dan has an MBA from Harvard Business School and a BA from the University of Texas at Austin. In this episode we discuss the following: We’re prone to focus on weakness and shortcomings. Almost 2/3 of emotion words are negative. When we write in journals, we tend to focus on what’s not working. But focusing on our bright spots can be superpower. We naturally assume that when there are problems we should spend our time focusing on the problems. But an alternative approach is to focus on strengths…the bright spots. It’s so easy to think, “What’s the problem and how do we fix it?” But another mode of inquiry that is every bit as powerful but rarely asked is “What's working today and how can we do more of that?” "Again and again in life you’re going to encounter situations with mixed signals. Our natural tendency is to dwell on what's not working, what's broken. But I want you to be the person that says 'Hang on a second, let's flip this and look at the other side of the spectrum. What are the bright spots?'” Dan is a serial procrastinator. But by focusing on his bright spots, analyzing when he was at his best, he realized that to be most productive he needed to spend his mornings writing in coffee shops. “One company in particular added an increment of about 9 digits of revenue just by studying their own best work.”   Follow Dan: Website: https://heathbrothers.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dan-heath-aa5a63147/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/whatitsliketobepodcast/ Follow Me: X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nate_meikle/
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Jan 15, 2024 • 1h

116: Hostage Negotiator Chris Voss | Collaborative Beats Cutthroat

Chris Voss is a former Lead FBI Negotiator who debunks the biggest myths of negotiation. Chris has lectured on negotiation at business schools across the country and has been seen on ABC, CBS, CNN, and Fox News. Chris has also been featured in Forbes, Time, Fast Company, and Inc. Chris’s Keynotes are based on his book Never Split The Difference which has sold more than 3 million copies in 33 languages. In this episode we discuss the following: For most negotiations use either a playful, upbeat tone or the “Late night FM DJ voice.” And smile. Oprah may be the greatest negotiator of all time. And people still like her. Collaboration beats cutthroat. Women pick up “tactical empathy” better than men. But also they are punished more than men for bad negotiating. Extreme anchors have the tendency of driving deals away from the table. If you routinely win “too big” in negotiations, people may stop dealing with you. Prepare people for bad news with phrases like, “You’re probably not going to like this…” This phrase is way better than, “Not to be rude…” Accusation Audit: Imagine the negative thoughts your counterparty has about you and proactively address them. Mirror Technique: Repeat that last 3-5 words of what somebody just said. This is often received much better than, “What do you mean?” Labeling Technique: After your counterparty speaks, label what they said by using phrases such as, “It seems like…” or “It sounds like…” Use no-oriented questions: “Have you got a few minutes to talk” can be changed to “Is now a bad time to talk?” “Can I have the day off?” can be changed to “Is it ridiculous to ask for tomorrow off?” When negotiating salary, first negotiate success: “How can I be guaranteed to be engaged in projects that are critical to our strategic future.” And Chris’s final message: You’re going to be more prosperous being collaborative than cutthroat.   Follow Chris: Website: https://www.blackswanltd.com/ X: https://twitter.com/fbinegotiator LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christophervoss/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thefbinegotiator/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCk7jHqdlFFDBhC1QIFqi54w Book: https://amzn.to/41zEcQj Follow Me: X: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nate_meikle/
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Jan 8, 2024 • 17min

115: UCLA Professor Cassie Holmes | Time Poverty and Happiness

Cassie Holmes is an award-winning marketing professor at UCLA and the bestselling author of Happier Hour: How to Beat Distraction, Expand Your Time, and Focus on What Matters Most. Her book was called a “must read” by Forbes, the Washington Post, and the Financial Times, and was featured on the Today Show, CBS Mornings, CNN, NPR’s Hidden Brain, and GOOP with Gwyneth Paltrow. Cassie’s research has been published in leading academic journals, and the course she developed, Applying the Science of Happiness to Life Design, is among UCLA’s most popular MBA classes. Prior to joining UCLA, Cassie was a professor at Wharton. She has a Ph.D. from Stanford’s Graduate School of Business and a B.A. from Columbia. In this episode we discuss the following: The answer for greater happiness isn’t having more time. It’s making our time more fulfilling. Looking at data of hundreds of thousands of working and nonworking Americans shows that people with too little time were just as unhappy as people with too much time. However, 2-5 hours of discretionary time, plus using that time in meaningful ways, was the sweet spot for maximum happiness. Happiness isn’t about being time rich. It’s about making our time rich. One way to make our time rich is to track our time for a week, while also rating how we feel on a 10 point scale coming out of each activity. Initial data shows that social media can set subjective and arbitrary expectations for how we should spend our time, thus decreasing our feelings of time richness and fulfillment. When we feel “time poor” we stop helping others. But helping others makes our time more fulfilling thus reducing our feeling of time poverty. Time management has traditionally focused on maximizing productivity. But by slowing down and focusing on tasks that are more meaningful, like having a nice conversation with a colleague, spouse, or child, we can increase our happiness and reduce our feeling of time poverty. To increase your happiness, take your grandma to lunch. She’ll have perspective, knowledge, and wisdom gained through experience on how to spend your time meaningfully.   Follow Cassie: Website: https://www.cassiemholmes.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cassiemholmes/ Follow Me: Twitter: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nate_meikle/
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Jan 7, 2024 • 49min

114: Sundays with Tozer Episode 7 | Tozer Becomes a Tutor at College and Receives a Standing Ovation

Justin Tozer is a math and science prodigy who grew up on a farm where formal education was all but prohibited. Yet, somehow Tozer would make his way to the world’s most prestigious firms, first in Silicon Valley and later in Los Alamos at the world’s preeminent scientific lab. Yet no professional accomplishment compares to the countless lives Tozer has saved, changed, and enhanced. In this episode we discuss the following: How Tozer started tutoring people in college and in Idaho Falls How Tozer used me to help other people How Tozer received a standing ovation for standing up for his classmates   Follow Me: Twitter: https://twitter.com/nate_meikle LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/natemeikle/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nate_meikle/

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