Earn Your Happy

I love a good story and today’s guest, author Alex Banayan has a great one – so much so that parts of it have become part of my husband Chris and I’s daily walks. Thank goodness I met him in person when Chris interviewed him so I knew whose stories he was actually talking about. ;) Another fun coincidence, we’ve both been on the Price Is Right, but Alex actually WON and used those winnings to fund his new book, The Third Door.   Alex shares with us his seven-year book journey that lead him to interview some of the world’s most successful people to show how they broke through and launched their careers. But let’s not downplay the fears and obstacles that Alex had to navigate through as well. From disappointing his family and losing his father to insecurity and being turned down by potential interviewees, Alex was persistent and now helps others conquer obstacles of all kinds – internal and external.   Alex truly is a gifted storyteller and I know you’ll be able to relate to some many facets of his journey. You don’t want to miss it!   --   Question Highlights: Now that your book is out in the world, what has been a response that you weren’t expecting? What was the whole point of writing your book? What does pain with awareness look like for you right now? Do you think there’s always a way for anything you choose or just for the moments when your gut pulls you that way? Have you ever had to let go of helping someone in your life because they’re not ready to help themselves? What was a story that freed you up the most? What is something that shook you before your book came out? What are you most excited about right now? Who is the ultimate person you want to read your book?   In This Episode We Talk about: Alex’s seven-year book journey Using pain as a motivator Evolving motivation Alex’s insecurity while writing The Third Door How Alex’s pain evolved into curiosity How Alex’s Price Is Right winnings funded his book Why being naïve can be an advantage The difference between fear and courage Why Alex’s family didn’t initially support his book Welcoming fear to get more comfortable How fear was a universal element in achieving a dream in all the people Alex interviewed Sharing in order to connect with others How to conquer internal and external obstacles And so much more…   Quotes   “Pain with awareness is our teacher.”   “You can give someone all the best tools and knowledge in the world and their life can still be stuck, but if you change what someone believes is possible, they’ll never be the same.”   “Courage is acknowledging fears, analyzing the consequences and then deciding you care so much about it you’re going to take one thoughtful step forward anyway.”   -- ALEX BANAYAN is the author of the national bestseller The Third Door, which chronicles his five-year quest to track down Bill Gates, Lady Gaga, Warren Buffett, Maya Angelou, Steven Spielberg, and dozens more of the world’s most successful people to uncover how they broke through and launched their careers.   Banayan has been named to Forbes’ 30 Under 30 list, Business Insider’s Most Powerful People Under 30, and been featured in major media including Fortune, Forbes, Businessweek, Billboard, Bloomberg TV, CNBC, Fox News, MSNBC, and CBS News. An acclaimed keynote speaker, Banayan has presented the Third Door framework to business conferences and corporate leadership teams around the world, including Apple, Google, Nike, IBM, Snapchat, Salesforce, Disney, Harvard, and countless others.   Resources:   Instagram: @alexbanayan  Book: The Third Door ThirdDoorBook.com Find it on Amazon   Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.  

This past weekend I spoke at the Thrive event in Las Vegas (which was amazing), and I also came to the realization that my life is one big classroom. You see, I got sick the morning of the day I was supposed to speak. I’m not sure if it was food poisoning or the flu, but needless to say I wasn’t going anywhere for a while. It was like life was flashing a big neon sign with a message that was impossible for me to ignore. In fact, there were multiple nudges, messages and signs that day, but I’ll leave those for another episode as I’m still marinating in a few of them. One thing I’ve come to realize though is that:   “Every single thing that happens can be a breakthrough lesson and everyone can be a teacher.”   Now this doesn’t mean that nothing bothers us, but it does mean that we get to choose how we view a particular situation and move through it. Yes, you may struggle and it may be annoying or painful, but the sooner we can accept it, the more quickly we’re able to advance to the next level.   “The sooner we accept the obstacle as a lesson or the person as a teacher, we get to move through it faster.”   As Tom Bilyeu shared with me just the other day, “Struggle is guaranteed, success is not.” In order to get to the next level, we have to experience it all. And if we’re going to struggle, we may as well get something useful out of it, yes?   Compare it to a rookie’s journey to becoming a pro. There’s always that point where the rookie is thrown in the game and the team may win or they might lose. The rookie will learn the do’s and don’ts – most likely the hard way. Whatever they experience though, it’s necessary because the coaches make the decision to move up that particular player if they don’t see them in action.   Once you realize that obstacles and people (yes, even those rude people in traffic) are here to teach us, you will experience a whole new level of freedom. It will be uncomfortable and you might shout expletives now and again, but practice and sharpening the skills of love, compassion, boundaries and saying no will help you step into that next level of your life.   -- In This Episode Lori talks about:   Why life is our classroom Why struggle is inevitable Viewing obstacles as lessons and people as teachers     Resources:   Aligned Registration Opens soon. Sign up to be the first to know when and to receive a free training at BecomeAligned.com   Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.

I’m so excited, as always, to have my husband, Chris Harder, back on the show and today we’re sharing some of our most impactful stories that have helped lead us to the full-circle rich lives we’re leading now. We’re far from perfect and that’s exactly why we love sharing our ups and downs with as many people possible – even if they’re super embarrassing.   Tune in to hear four+ stories and lessons we’ve learned along the way and let us know if you can relate. Wanna hear more? Be sure to check out our Free Video Training at BecomeAligned.com. --      In This Episode We Talk about: “The Great Chicken Nugget Battle of 2006” Taking ownership of your life, stories, happiness and dreams The gap between good and great Why Chris decided to read 30 books in 30 days Why giving is the secret to getting everything you want Having an attitude of abundance Giving with no contingencies or expectations Building intentional tribes Waffles’ dog training and how it applies to your habits and beliefs Why anxiety is a result of no boundaries Reinforcing habits and beliefs you want to keep in your life Moving away from relationships that are holding you back Why ego is your greatest overhead Acknowledging and working around your ego And so much more…   Quotes “I believe we were put here to live a really full-circle, rich life.” – Chris Harder   “Action creates clarity.” – Lori Harder   “You are 100% responsible for the outcome of every moment in your life.” – Chris Harder   “Giving is the secret to getting everything you want.” – Chris Harder   “Build tribes for where you are going and not for where you’re at.” – Lori Harder  -- Resources: Aligned Registration Opens soon. Sign up to be the first to know when and to receive a free training at BecomeAligned.com     Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.

With a lot of speaking engagements going on for me right now and in the near future, I’ve had to really stop and observe my anxious tendencies and the thoughts that often go along with them. It’s amazing how powerful our thoughts and inner dialogue can be. Today’s episode is all about freeing yourself from the labels that hold you back and knowing that you’re the only one who has that power to do so.   How often have you heard, “I have such anxiety when it comes to speaking in front of people”? Hand raised over here because I’ve definitely said it to myself before. But here’s where we change it. We don’t “have” anxiety. We “do” anxiety. We don’t “have” no energy. We “do” no energy. And it’s in this doing that we have the choice as to what we do or don’t do. See where I’m going with this?   I’d like you to do a quick exercise to take back your power. First, write what you “have.”               Example: I have anxiety.   Now cross that out and write DO instead.               I have anxiety. I DO anxiety.   Now describe how you “do” anxiety right now? What actions are supporting this feeling? What thoughts?                         I’m drinking coffee. I’m checking messages right when I wake up. I’m eating crappy food and isolating myself. I keep telling myself how nervous I am and that            I’m going to forget what I’m saying on stage.   Take notice of the conversation in your mind and watch how you’re talking to yourself. If you’re anxious, reframe and tell yourself how excited you are and why. Replace your thoughts with better thoughts and take your control back!   No lie, it doesn’t always go fast. But keep trying on different feelings until it does feel good.   “Choose how you feel.”   Tell yourself, “I can undo any feeling I don’t want to be in.”   And remember, once you start putting out these better feelings, you’ll notice that you’re attracting more too.   -- In This Episode Lori talks about:   Freeing yourself from labels that hold you back Taking ownership of your thoughts Why you don’t “have” anxiety, you “do” anxiety     Resources:   Aligned Registration Opens soon. Sign up to be the first to know when and to receive a free training at BecomeAligned.com   Join Lori, Oprah Magazine’s staff and other thought leaders on the Oprah Magazine Cruise to the Bahamas | Oct. 28-Nov. 4!   Go here for details: https://www.hollandamerica.com/en_US/cruise-ships/ms-nieuw-statendam/oprah-caribbean-adventure-of-your-life.html Go to ATribeCalledBliss.com to find out the latest on Lori’s book tour and join the world’s biggest tribe book club   A Tribe Called Bliss by Lori Harder Now available at loriharder.com/amazon or ATribeCalledBliss.com Join me on the A Tribe Called Bliss Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1571018952966750/ Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.

Just a head’s up that today’s topic may be a touch overwhelming for some, but I don’t want anyone to get too worried, because when it comes to shifting and changing a person’s beliefs – it’s actually never-ending.   I’ve discovered recently just how important it is to take inventory of one’s tribe, aka the people who we’re spending the most time with. Keep in mind that this can be actual people, television, podcasts etc. I like to also call them reinforcers.   I want you to do a quick exercise and write down the following:   List five people who you’re around the most. What is the main belief, habit or limiting belief or thing that they are reinforcing in your life?   When completed, review and determine if these habits and beliefs are reflecting back at you. Are they holding you back? Don’t panic if it’s not what you thought. I’m certainly not here to tell you who to hang out with and I certainly won’t tell you to ditch friends who aren’t “positive” enough. But I am telling you that you may want to load the other portions of your “plate” with more positive or up-leveling people. Crowd out your plate in a positive direction.   Maybe that means joining a new group or mastermind? Maybe it’s adding more podcasts, books or self-development events to your life. Whatever it is, just make sure to, “set up a life and tribe that reflects where you’re going and not where you’re at.”   -- In This Episode Lori talks about:   Taking a tribe inventory Shifting and changing belief systems Why we need more positive reinforcers in our lives     Resources:   Aligned Registration Opens soon. Sign up to be the first to know when and to receive a free training at BecomeAligned.com   Join Lori, Oprah Magazine’s staff and other thought leaders on the Oprah Magazine Cruise to the Bahamas | Oct. 28-Nov. 4!   Go here for details: https://www.hollandamerica.com/en_US/cruise-ships/ms-nieuw-statendam/oprah-caribbean-adventure-of-your-life.html   Thrive Event | Sept. 14-16, 2018, Las Vegas AttendThrive.com Go to ATribeCalledBliss.com to find out the latest on Lori’s book tour and join the world’s biggest tribe book club   A Tribe Called Bliss by Lori Harder Now available at loriharder.com/amazon or ATribeCalledBliss.com   Join me on the A Tribe Called Bliss Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1571018952966750/   Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.

“You have everything you need inside of you.”   You may have read or heard this quote from me before, but if I’m being honest, the first time I heard this quote I called BS on it. I mean sure, it’s an empowering concept, but if you don’t know how to look at it from all sides (which I didn’t when I first heard it), it’s disempowering.   But here’s where it does hold true. You do have everything you need right now to start asking questions and to be resourceful. How empowering is that?   “You have all you need to in order to create whatever you’re desiring in your life.”   For example, when I first started my podcast, I knew nothing…I mean nothing about starting a podcast. So I started researching (Google) and finding others who could help me get it off the ground. I was not meant to create all the things by myself. For this particular endeavor, I had the idea and it was up to me to move it forward. It was literally a matter of asking the right questions.   All that’s left to do is start! After all, “pure bliss is becoming the person that you knew you were meant to be.” But it’s up to you to create the experiences in order to bring that person into reality.    Now to all my over-thinkers out there (you know who you are), you may be coming up with a list a mile long of all the reasons you just can’t do it. But here’s my advice: start now! If you don’t take action, you won’t fulfill your purpose. It sounds harsh, but it’s true.   Don’t worry if things don’t go as planned. Know that it’s all a part of the process and that the universe will provide a soft landing. And even if you feel that sometimes your actions are selfish, know that you’re making progress and it’s somehow affecting someone in a beautiful way.     Are you with me? Let’s start taking action – big and small steps – now! -- In This Episode Lori talks about:   Why everything you need isn’t inside of you Being resourceful Creating experiences to help you step into your highest purpose   Resources:   Join Lori, Oprah Magazine’s staff and other thought leaders on the Oprah Magazine Cruise to the Bahamas | Oct. 28-Nov. 4!   Go here for details: https://www.hollandamerica.com/en_US/cruise-ships/ms-nieuw-statendam/oprah-caribbean-adventure-of-your-life.html   Thrive Event | Sept. 14-16, 2018, Las Vegas AttendThrive.com   Go to ATribeCalledBliss.com to find out the latest on Lori’s book tour and join the world’s biggest tribe book club   A Tribe Called Bliss by Lori Harder Now available at loriharder.com/amazon or ATribeCalledBliss.com Join me on the A Tribe Called Bliss Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1571018952966750/ Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.

I want to start off by saying a huge thank you to all who listen and follow this podcast. As we fly into 8 million downloads, I have to keep pinching myself to ensure it’s all real. I couldn’t do this without you all and I am so, so grateful that you choose to spend part of your day listening.   A couple months back, I heard the phrase “I am blissfully dissatisfied with my life,” from the amazing Ed Mylett. And I love the balance of the two words because it means being blissfully happy with where you’re at while being equally dissatisfied with wanting more or knowing you have more to give.   “In order to be a happy human, we have to make progress.”   Whether it’s in terms of your health, family, relationships or your business, progress keeps us alive! The other day the idea of being blissfully dissatisfied was brought back into my life when I received a message from a follower. Upon first glance this woman looked like someone I could be friends with – she was a yogi, into wellness etc. – but upon reading the first sentence (I’m going to have to unfollow you because you seem to have a ‘deep dissatisfaction’ with your life), I don’t think we’ll be friends anytime soon. I close the message before I could read the whole thing because honestly, I was breathing fire! Then I took a moment, went back, blocked her and deleted the message. Sure, I could have responded, but people with energy like that are not for me.   So anyway, this message got me thinking back to what Ed Mylett had said and I honestly thought… I am equal parts satisfied and dissatisfied – and I’m totally OK with that. You see, as humans, we’re not wired to be happy. We have a need to be better – for ourselves and others. But in order to find this balance, we can’t be focused on satisfaction in ALL areas at ALL times. We must give ourselves grace in the areas that aren’t the priority and pour ourselves into the other areas despite potential side effects.   So yes, I will never be satisfied, but I will ALWAYS be blissful. And I will always strive to show as much love, grace and compassion to all those who think I feel otherwise.     -- In This Episode Lori talks about:   Why progressing is crucial for our happiness How she dealt with an unkind message Giving yourself grace  Resources:   Join Lori, Oprah Magazine’s staff and other thought leaders on the Oprah Magazine Cruise to the Bahamas | Oct. 28-Nov. 4!   Go here for details: https://www.hollandamerica.com/en_US/cruise-ships/ms-nieuw-statendam/oprah-caribbean-adventure-of-your-life.html   Thrive Event | Sept. 14-16, 2018, Las Vegas AttendThrive.com   Go to ATribeCalledBliss.com to find out the latest on Lori’s book tour and join the world’s biggest tribe book club   A Tribe Called Bliss by Lori Harder Now available at loriharder.com/amazon or ATribeCalledBliss.com   Join me on the A Tribe Called Bliss Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1571018952966750/ Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.

Today’s episode is a super special quickie and it involves something I’ve been manifesting for years. While I was wrapping up my three-week European vacation I received notice that I was selected to be a speaker on one of the Oprah Magazine Cruises – yes, THE Oprah! My mind is still whirling from this news.   I firmly believe that this opportunity came up after I finally cleared enough stuff to make room for it while I allowed myself to recharge and get away on my trip. And honestly, as odd as it sounds, once I was able to actually “let go” of my dream to meet Oprah (there was literally a dream where it happened – listen to hear about it) and know that either way, I’m OK – it happened. It’s all about living into your gifts.   Here’s a little Manifestation 101 on how I was able to live into my Oprah manifestation: You have to put the work in, believe in a little bit of magic and have faith. Allow that dream to look different and probably the most important – be patient. Focus on why you’re awesome and what you love about yourself. Who or what brings out that part of you? Be the energy you want to attract. Raise your vibration to get there. Get clear and declare it. If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ve likely heard my Oprah dream quite a few times. ;) Release it. You are significant and loved regardless of whether or not this dream happens.   I would love to see you on the Oprah Cruise (to the Bahamas) with me! Check out the link in the resources and let’s fill that ship up with the highest-vibing people ever! It will be like a boat version of Bliss Project! Be sure to message or tag me on Instagram if you’re in – I cannot wait!     -- In This Episode Lori talks about:   Lori’s keynote speaker opportunity on an Oprah Magazine Cruise Letting go of dreams to allow them to happen Lori’s five tips to help you manifest what you desire    Resources:   Join Lori, Oprah Magazine’s staff and other thought leaders on the Oprah Magazine Cruise to the Bahamas | Oct. 28-Nov. 4! Go here for details: https://www.hollandamerica.com/en_US/cruise-ships/ms-nieuw-statendam/oprah-caribbean-adventure-of-your-life.html   Thrive Event | Sept. 14-16, 2018, Las Vegas AttendThrive.com   Go to ATribeCalledBliss.com to find out the latest on Lori’s book tour and join the world’s biggest tribe book club A Tribe Called Bliss by Lori Harder Now available at loriharder.com/amazon or ATribeCalledBliss.com   Join me on the A Tribe Called Bliss Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1571018952966750/   Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.

You’re going to love today’s guest, Angie Lee, as she’s a wise old soul at the core but not even 30 years old! She and I go back 10 years to a fitness camp we attended together. Since that time she’s become this powerhouse business woman who loves sharing her light and knowledge with others.   Today, we’re dialing into the present and talking about Angie’s upcoming book, Raise Your Hand as well as her Pays to Be Brave event in October – and all the fears and doubts that come up as a result. She believes that being bold is key and that “no’s” are imperative to anyone’s journey.   I hope you enjoy a good mixture of silliness and seriousness because you’ll get a big dose of both in this episode! Don’t be surprised if you’re ready to write your own book or host an event after listening!    --   Question Highlights: What is the most exciting thing in your life right now? What is the journey your event is taking you on and reflecting back at you right now? What is your new book about? Why aren’t women “raising their hands?” How can we deal with getting no’s? What is something right now that’s pushing on your solar plexus that you have to ask for? Can you share one of your “what was I thinking” moments that’s also helped you grow? How do we tell the difference between a gut check and fear? In This Episode We Talk about: How Angie’s upcoming event, “Pays to Be Brave,” blends both woo-woo and business together Intuitive organic marketing Battling and pushing through fear Why being bold is one of the most important qualities a woman can have Putting a value on what you have to offer and how that correlates with your worth Money as an energy exchange Handing off (or hiring out) things that aren’t in your zone of genius Dealing with negative feedback Why polarity is necessary The difference between the skillsets of an entrepreneur vs. a leader The importance of gut checks and not just what’s on paper And so much more…   Quotes “I treat the marketing and numbers like they’re real people.”   “It’s OK to hear no because it also may be a yes down the road.”   “It’s never as bad as we make it out to be.”   “The business doesn’t grow unless the team grows.”   -- Angie Lee is the hilarious + wicked smart business bestie you've always wanted. A serial entrepreneur, vibrant speaker, life coach & business mentor, Angie's genius is helping women embrace fear, take messy action and monetize their passion.    Corporate + College dropout, $100k in debt to 7-figure entrepreneur under 30, Angie's passion runs deep for helping women unlock their full potential to finally create the income and life they desire. Angie is the host of the top-rated The Angie Lee Show, the Founder of Pays to Be Brave Summit and the upcoming self-published author of Raise Your Hand.   Her Wellpreneur Mastermind teaches wellness professionals how to grow their social brand and close sales with ease. Angie's cracked the code for organic marketing by successfully producing multiple 6- and 7-figure product launches, with no paid advertising or complicated funnels. She now teaches her loyal community how to grow and scale their online business with standout branding, authentic messaging and intuitive marketing.  Resources: AngieLee.com IG: @AngieLeeShow   Book: Raise Your Hand by Angie Lee (Coming later in 2018)   Pays to Be Brave Summit Oct. 20-21, 2018  •  San Diego, CA   The Angie Lee Show on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/angie-lee-show-entrepreneurship-marketing-social-media/id1178232410?mt=2   Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.    

It never gets old seeing and hearing what readers are resonating within A Tribe Called Bliss. I love hearing what people are taking away and what makes that light bulb turn on for them. Recently, I’ve seen a lot of people calling out the following quote:   “He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away.” – Raymond Hull   We’ve all been guilty of this at one time or another, and I think it’s been such an a-ha moment for people in the book because it’s giving others permission to step even more into themselves and be who they truly are – regardless of what other people will think.   So what part of yourself have you been whittling away in order to make someone else happy? Are you hiding a part of yourself because you’re afraid to show that part? Or is it because you’re surrounding yourself with people who aren’t the right fit for where you’re at?   It’s time to get real with yourself – dig deep. What do YOU need right now? Look from all angles, and STOP turning the volume down on who you are. Is it easy? Um, not quite, but I will tell you this:   “The highest good doesn’t always feel good.”   This is where you must confront any resistance you have head on and grow from it. Find out who you truly are. If you’ve whittled yourself so far down that you don’t even know who you are, it’s time to get to work.   First, figure out what emotion is the most important for you to live in. Then, choose one thing a day that helps you live it out. It could be reading or listening to podcasts, but what I’m really looking for are tangible actions. DO something! And don’t worry if you try something and it’s not the right fit. Trust me, you’ll know immediately, just has you’ll instantly know if it’s the “right” thing.   So who’s with me? It’s time to put that inspiration into action.   -- In This Episode Lori talks about:   Importance of following your bliss, joy, pleasure and where you’re being guided Constantly seeking resistance in order to grow Taking inspired action     Resources:   Go to ATribeCalledBliss.com to find out the latest on Lori’s book tour and join the world’s biggest tribe book club   A Tribe Called Bliss by Lori Harder Now available at loriharder.com/amazon or ATribeCalledBliss.com   Join me on the A Tribe Called Bliss Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1571018952966750/  Check out my website at loriharder.com. Follow me on social media @LoriHarder on Instagram and Lori Harder on Facebook.