

The Modern Phoenix
Gervase Kolmos
The Modern Phoenix (formerly "It's All Me")
In a culture that values logic, urgency, perfection, and sameness, The Modern Phoenix walks a different path: one that honors her unique mind, body and soul.
Between information overload, the demands of modern life, and lifetimes of conditioning and "shoulds", it can feel hard for a woman to know and listen to her own wants and needs. We're so busy caring and doing and anticipating and managing that we forget ourselves. We hope there's a better, more balanced, life-giving and feminine way to be a modern woman—to have regulated nervous systems, intuitive solutions to complex problems, and the distinct trust in ourselves and our choices, despite life's curveballs, but we're not sure where to start.
That's where I come in. I'm Gervase Kolmos, Inner Transformation Coach and phoenix-in-evolution. I help women learn to trust themselves and be guided by their own inner authority to live with pleasure, authenticity and embodied wisdom.
This podcast is my mission and my mantra: you are light and dark, thinking and feeling, perfect and a work-in-progress. Together, we'll unlock your intuition, tap into the wisdom and resources of your body, and navigate this confusing, demanding, gorgeous life.
So let's burn down the stories, conditioning and beliefs that don't serve us, shall we?
In a culture that values logic, urgency, perfection, and sameness, The Modern Phoenix walks a different path: one that honors her unique mind, body and soul.
Between information overload, the demands of modern life, and lifetimes of conditioning and "shoulds", it can feel hard for a woman to know and listen to her own wants and needs. We're so busy caring and doing and anticipating and managing that we forget ourselves. We hope there's a better, more balanced, life-giving and feminine way to be a modern woman—to have regulated nervous systems, intuitive solutions to complex problems, and the distinct trust in ourselves and our choices, despite life's curveballs, but we're not sure where to start.
That's where I come in. I'm Gervase Kolmos, Inner Transformation Coach and phoenix-in-evolution. I help women learn to trust themselves and be guided by their own inner authority to live with pleasure, authenticity and embodied wisdom.
This podcast is my mission and my mantra: you are light and dark, thinking and feeling, perfect and a work-in-progress. Together, we'll unlock your intuition, tap into the wisdom and resources of your body, and navigate this confusing, demanding, gorgeous life.
So let's burn down the stories, conditioning and beliefs that don't serve us, shall we?
Episodes
Mentioned books

Dec 15, 2025 • 27min
When Will It Be Enough? Reclaiming Your Inner 'Enoughness' in a Capitalist World
In this soulful December episode, Gervase pulls back the curtain on her decision to shift The Modern Phoenix Podcast to a monthly publishing schedule and the deeper question underneath it: When will it be enough? From business to motherhood to Black Friday shopping spirals, she explores how capitalism and patriarchy train women to measure our value by how much we do, produce, and perform—and why it will never feel like enough if we're only chasing external metrics. You'll be invited into a simple, somatic practice to reconnect with your body, your soul, and your inner sense of "I am already enough," so you can move through the holidays and the new year with more intention, gentleness, and grounded power. Listen to this episode to discover: Why Gervase is moving the podcast to a monthly schedule (and why that's a power move, not a retreat). How capitalism quietly lives inside your thoughts, to-do lists, and sense of worth. The difference between "doing more" and actually feeling like enough. A simple hand-on-heart embodiment practice you can use anytime to come back to yourself. How reclaiming your inner enoughness changes the way you parent, work, and make decisions. This episode is for you if… You are a woman who has tried to earn her worth by doing more—at work, at home, in your business, in motherhood—and it still never feels like enough. You're tired of the hamster wheel but scared to step off. You're craving a softer, more embodied way of living and leading that doesn't require you to abandon yourself to be "successful." You want to feel grounded, resourced, and okay inside your own body—no matter what your inbox, bank account, or holiday calendar looks like. Pull Quotes "We will never do enough on the outside for it to feel enough on the inside." "Capitalism literally profits from us never feeling enough." "Creating one podcast episode with love is more powerful than four frantic episodes from lack." "You can't take power from someone who is embodied in themselves." "Just because something is normal in dominant culture doesn't mean you need to do it." Resources Mentioned Tulum Retreat — March 18–22, 2026 A deep, luxurious, party-meets-prayer retreat experience for women in the jungle of Tulum, Mexico. Inner Knowing Immersion — Two 1:1 sessions with Gervase focused on one specific pattern that keeps you spiraled, plus a custom hypnosis track you keep forever. Soul Shift Intensive — A powerful deep-dive 1:1 experience to catalyze a shift in one core area of your life. Join Us: Be part of the Phoenix community—circles, retreats, and offerings that honor endings, beginnings, and everything in between. Join to receive biweekly entries from my Phoenix Diary: https://www.gervasekolmos.com/subscribe Work with Gervase: Explore the Tulum Retreat (March 18–22, 2026) and step out of the capitalism hamster wheel and into a jungle oasis of healing, play, and sisterhood. - Tulum Retreat Book an Inner Knowing Immersion to start building an inner sense of enoughness that cannot be taken from you - The Inner Knowing Immersion 1:1 coaching - learn more about it here Follow Gervase: Instagram: www.instagram.com/gervasekolmos.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GervaseKolmosCoaching YouTube: www.youtube.com/@themodernphoenix

Dec 1, 2025 • 25min
I Choreograph My Whole Life Around Joy
What if you planned your day around what lights you up—on purpose? In this raw solo, Gervase shares how a rooftop birthday party became a masterclass in scheduling for joy instead of obligation. From proactively blocking her calendar and rescheduling a client to delegating kid pickup and coaching a friend out of "show face" energy, she models what it looks like to let inner knowing lead. Expect grounded coaching on permission, partnership, mom‑guilt, entrepreneurship, and why your ecosystem thrives when you bloom. Feeling good isn't frivolous—it's functional. Listen to this episode to discover: How to use your calendar as a subconscious signal ("this matters") Why modeling aliveness is real leadership (at work and at home) The mindset reframe for rescheduling without guilt How to delegate life‑load (kid pickup, anyone?) so joy has space The litmus test: feeling good feels easy when the inner work is landing This episode is for you if: You're over "show face" energy and want to lead from aliveness; you're a mom who keeps crunching joy between pickup and meetings; you're an entrepreneur who built freedom but still plays by invisible rules; or you're simply ready to block the joy first and let the rest of life rearrange. Pull Quotes "Add it to the calendar. Tell your subconscious: this matters." "Leadership through aliveness beats leadership through obligation." "You don't have to earn sunshine—you lean toward it." "You'll know the work is working when feeling good is easy." Resources Mentioned Inner Knowing Immersion — two 90‑minute sessions + custom hypnosis (21‑day anchoring) Nuuly clothing rental—G's referral code: https://share.nuuly.com/gervase7 Find Andrea Serrano (birthday muse + rooftop magic) on IG: https://www.instagram.com/andreaserranocurates/ Join Us: Be part of the Phoenix community—circles, retreats, and offerings that honor endings, beginnings, and everything in between. Join to receive biweekly entries from my Phoenix Diary: https://www.gervasekolmos.com/subscribe Work with Gervase: Inner Knowing Immersion (2× 90‑min 1:1 + custom hypnosis). Limited to two per month: gervasekolmos.com/immersion 1:1 coaching - learn more about it here Inner Knowing Immersion (2× 90‑min 1:1 + custom hypnosis). Limited to two per month: The Inner Knowing Immersion Follow Gervase: Instagram: www.instagram.com/gervasekolmos.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GervaseKolmosCoaching YouTube: www.youtube.com/@themodernphoenix

Nov 17, 2025 • 46min
When I Don't Know What to Do, I Return to Me
When I Don't Know What to Do, I Return to Me is a raw solo where Gervase shares two real-life vignettes—a Zoom with a master lawyer taken from a Costco aisle and a mama-bear moment about her child's bully—to show exactly how she moves from rumination to inner knowing. You'll hear her NPR framework (Notice–Pause–Resource), the shift from outside eyes to inside eyes, and the embodied practice of taking your seat so your next right-for-you move becomes obvious. She also introduces The Inner Knowing Immersion: two 90‑minute sessions + a custom hypnosis track to anchor this practice for 21 days and beyond. Listen to this episode to discover: The NPR micro‑framework to move from spin to center Inside eyes vs. outside eyes (and how to switch) What it means to take your seat—even in public How to spot self‑gaslighting and people‑pleasing Why clean energy = clean communication How a custom hypnosis can anchor self‑trust for 21 days This episode is for you if: You're looping on a decision, performing to be palatable, or afraid of getting it "wrong." You want practical, embodied tools to choose the truest thing—at school pickup, in a boardroom, or in a Costco aisle. Pull Quotes: "When I don't know what to do, I return to me." "Outside eyes look for rules. Inside eyes look for truth." "I took my seat—in a Costco aisle." "You've already won when you don't abandon yourself." "Perfection is a performance. Truth is a frequency." Resources Mentioned: Inner Knowing Immersion — two 90‑minute sessions + custom hypnosis (21‑day anchoring) NPR = Notice • Pause • Resource (simple nervous-system reset) Join Us: Craving consistent circles and retreats? Join the newsletter for upcoming circles, retreats, and special offerings: https://www.gervasekolmos.com/subscribe Work with Gervase: 1:1 coaching - learn more about it here The Inner Knowing Immersion is now open! Follow Gervase: Instagram: www.instagram.com/gervasekolmos.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GervaseKolmosCoaching YouTube: www.youtube.com/@themodernphoenix

Nov 3, 2025 • 34min
The Mountain Is Me: What Peru Burned Away (and What It Gave Back)
What if "retreat" isn't a luxury—but spiritual hygiene? In this raw solo, Gervase shares what happened on her Peru retreat in the Sacred Valley: the fire ceremony that helped her release an undercurrent of fear (10% at a time), how she anchored the steadiness of her inner mountain in her body, and why healing in circle, not solo, changes everything. Expect real talk on motherhood, anxious attachment, resourcing from nature (instead of numbing), and remembering the joyful, dancing essence beneath all your roles. Listen to this episode to discover: The grief/fire ceremony that helped Gervase let go of fear and anxious attachment (in doable 10% increments) "The mountain is me": how to anchor steadiness from land and nature into your nervous system Why we need relational healing and community containers (and how to stop DIY-ing your deepest work) Remembering your essence beneath the roles: ancient and joyful can both be true Retreat as sacred time: signaling to your body and calendar that "this matters" Discernment in healing (including Human Design intuition + choosing the right intensity for your system) This episode is for you if: You feel like a woman with her hair on fire and want grounded steadiness instead You're carrying fear or "buildup" from hard seasons and don't know how to move it You keep trying to heal alone and crave circle, ceremony, and nervous-system-safe support You want to feel more alive, on-purpose, and resourced in everyday life (not just on vacation) Resources Mentioned Medicine for the Modern Soul (retreat host: Tracy Rulaine Roberts) Gervase's Human Design note: Splenic Projector (using intuition as a green-light threshold) Join the Community / Upcoming Retreats The Phoenix Retreat — Charleston, Nov 6–9 (oceanfront house, ceremony + circle). Two bunks left—Gervase is in the bunk room too. Planning an international retreat in spring and another in fall 2026. Tell us where you want to go and what you're craving! Follow Gervase IG: @gervasekolmos Newsletter (juicy discounts + first dibs): gervasekolmos.com/subscribe 1:1 Soul Shift Intensives (90 minutes to get unstuck and clear): gervasekolmos.com/the-soul-shift-intensive

Oct 6, 2025 • 28min
Leaning Back Into Support: Why You Don't Have To Do It Alone
What if the reason you feel so exhausted isn't because you're "not strong enough," but because you've been conditioned to believe you should do it all by yourself? In this raw solo episode, Gervase dismantles the myth of hyper-independence and shares why leaning back—literally and metaphorically—is the medicine women need to restore balance. From nervous system regulation to generational imprints, she shows how centuries of cultural conditioning have pressured women to "do it all," and why the real path to vitality is found in community, co-regulation, and circle. Listen to this episode to discover: The simple embodiment practice that shifts your nervous system from overdrive to balance Why "DIY-ing" your healing is a lie, and how we're biologically wired for co-regulation How patriarchy, capitalism, and colonizer mindsets created the myth of going it alone Why being "everything to everyone" is not strength—it's burnout The power of circles, retreats, and sisterhood as ancient technologies for modern women Why leaning back, receiving, and being supported is the new model of success This episode is for you if: You feel depleted, overextended, or like everything will collapse if you stop for a second You've been taught that asking for help is weakness You're craving sisterhood, support, and spaces where you can be your full self You want practical tools to regulate your nervous system and soften back into balance Resources Mentioned in This Episode Mothers Rising – 6-week mother circle: https://www.gervasekolmos.com/mothers-rising The Phoenix Retreat - ONLY 2 SPOTS LEFT (Charleston, Nov 6–9): https://www.gervasekolmos.com/chs-retreat Follow Gervase: Let's hang out on IG: @gervasekolmos Want to go deeper (and get juicy discounts)? Sign up to Gervase's newsletter: gervasekolmos.com

Sep 22, 2025 • 22min
Your Body Tells the Truth of Your Trauma
What if the real story of your trauma isn't the one you keep telling yourself in your head — but the one your body has been holding all along? In this solo episode, G shares how trauma patterns show up in our daily lives (especially as mothers, makers, and women holding it all), and why breaking cycles requires more than mindset work. Drawing on focalizing training and the wisdom of teacher Nick Werber, she will reveal how our most obvious trauma response is often how we treat our own bodies — ignoring signals, pushing past limits, or abandoning ourselves when life feels full. This conversation weaves together personal stories (including her own rocky "back-to-school transition"), trauma-informed practices, and reminders that your body is not a machine — it's more like a garden that needs tending. When we stop abandoning ourselves and start listening to the body's wisdom, we begin to re-pattern, restore, and rise. Listen to this episode to discover: Why the most obvious trauma response is how you treat your body The difference between the story in your head and the story your body is telling How generational cycles and trauma show up in motherhood What I learned from crashing hard during my "back-to-school" transition (and how I found rhythm again) The ballerina-on-pointe metaphor: why balance is hundreds of tiny adjustments, not one rigid plan Why your nervous system needs seasons of rest, rhythm, and renewal — just like nature Practical ways to "resource as you go" so you don't abandon yourself JOIN US: Join G in Charleston to tune into your womanly wisdom, inner knowing, and soulful sisterhood: https://www.gervasekolmos.com/chs-retreat Mamas- it's time to reset, resource and rise together: Mothers Rising 6 week circle begins October 15th: https://www.gervasekolmos.com/mothers-rising Mentioned in this episode: Connect with Nick Werber - nicknwerber.comNick Werber | Integrative Coach | Instagram: @nickwerber_ Previous episode with Nick Werber (here) Follow me on Instagram: @gervasekolmos Sign up for my newsletter: gervasekolmos.com Quotes to Share: "The most obvious trauma response is how we treat our bodies." – Nick Werber "Your body is not a machine. It's more like a tree that needs seasons of rest, rhythm, and renewal." – Gervase

Sep 8, 2025 • 44min
Renovations, Motherhood & Meeting My Upper Limits on The Phoenix Spiral
What if the chaos in your life wasn't the problem—but the pressure you pile on top of it? In this raw and personal episode, Gervase shares the story of her unexpected home renovation, how it pushed her to the edge of her money stories and nervous system's capacity, and the surprising lessons it taught her about money, motherhood, and meeting upper limits. Instead of grinding harder, she discovered the power of release, metaphor, and permission—the feminine way of moving through life. Drawing from her own experiences and her work with clients, Gervase reveals how embracing the Phoenix spiral of death and rebirth can turn breakdowns into breakthroughs. If you've ever felt stretched too thin, guilty for dropping the ball, or at your breaking point, this episode is your reminder that you don't have to force your way through. There's another way—and it begins with letting go. Listen now to discover: Why chaos isn't the problem—it's the pressure we attach to it How nervous system capacity sets the ceiling for love, money, and abundance The Instant Pot "pressure valve" metaphor to release tension and reclaim peace Why dropping some of the balls you juggle is not only safe but necessary The Phoenix spiral: why life is death & rebirth, not a straight line How to reconnect to metaphor, archetype, and your inner world when life feels overwhelming Permission to embrace all of you—Netflix binges, divine downloads, and everything in between This episode is for you if: You're navigating a season of overwhelm and want a fresh perspective You find yourself self-sabotaging when life or money expands You feel like you're always at your limit and need practical ways to soften You crave a reminder that being human—messy, chaotic, and cyclical—is not a failure but part of the path Follow Gervase: Instagram: @gervasekolmos Newsletter + resources: gervasekolmos.com Work With Gervase: Book a 90-min Soul Shift Intensive for clarity and transformation Join Mothers Rising—a sacred circle for mothers to reset, resource and rise together

Aug 25, 2025 • 27min
How Internalized Capitalism Is Controlling Your Right To Rest And Exist
What if that voice telling you to "be more productive" isn't your inner wisdom but internalized capitalism? Most of us are living with constant pressure to optimize, monetize, and harvest every moment of our lives, and we don't even realize it. In this raw episode, Gervase shares a vulnerable moment from her own life that perfectly illustrates how capitalism has trained us to believe we don't get to just exist. She breaks down how this system affects modern women and offers practical ways to reclaim your humanity. This isn't about becoming anti-capitalism overnight, it's about recognizing the programming so you can make conscious choices about your own 500 square feet of life. Listen to this episode to discover: The moment Gervase realized she couldn't even enjoy a peaceful lunch with her son without thinking about content creation How internalized capitalism shows up in everyday life (spoiler: it's that voice saying "you're not doing enough") Why we've been programmed to turn every hobby, idea, and beautiful moment into a business opportunity The "harvest mentality" and why it's running you ragged How capitalism affects both stay-at-home and working moms (and why both feel like they're never enough) Simple acts of rebellion: ways to reclaim moments that capitalism can't touch Why your worth isn't determined by your output, and how to actually believe it How to create conscious moments of rest and pleasure without guilt The ripple effect of tending to your own "500 square feet" instead of trying to change the world This episode is for you if: You feel guilty taking breaks unless you've "earned" them Every hobby feels like it should become a side hustle You can't enjoy peaceful moments without thinking about productivity You're exhausted from the constant pressure to do more, be more, create more You want practical ways to reclaim your humanity in a productivity-obsessed world Resource Mentioned in this Episode: Toi Marie (Smith): https://www.toimarie.com/ Follow Gervase: Let's hang out on IG: @gervasekolmos Want to go deeper (and get juicy discounts)? Sign up to Gervase's newsletter: https://www.gervasekolmos.com/ Feel stuck in your career, relationship or life? Need clarity on how to move forward and get your groove back? Book a 90-minute Soul Shift Intensive with Gervase https://www.gervasekolmos.com/the-soul-shift-intensive

Aug 11, 2025 • 50min
Permission to Be Who You Are: Human Design for Mothers, Makers & Dreamers with Erin Claire Jones
What if the reason you constantly feel drained isn't because you're doing too much, but because you're doing things in a way that goes against your natural design? Most of us are running on empty, trying to force ourselves into systems and rhythms that work for other people—but not for us. This week, I sat down with human design expert and best-selling author Erin Claire Jones to explore how understanding your unique energetic blueprint can transform how you work, love, and live. Erin breaks down the practical magic of human design and shows us how to stop forcing and start flowing. She reveals why most of us have been conditioned to work against our natural energy patterns, how this creates burnout and disconnection, and the simple shifts that can help you honor your design. She shares practical insights for all 5 human design types and explains why this system is less mystical theory and more practical life manual. Listen to this episode to discover: What human design is and why it's the most practical system for understanding your energy and intuition The 5 human design types (Generators, Manifesting Generators, Projectors, Manifestors, and Reflectors) and how each is designed to move through the world Why Generators and Manifesting Generators need to ask "Do I really feel excited about this?" before saying yes to everything How Projectors can build successful businesses and raise families without burning out (spoiler: it's about working with your energy, not against it) Why Manifestors need freedom to do things their own way Why energy management is more important than time management How to use human design to understand your partner and kids on a deeper level Follow Gervase: Let's hang out on IG: @gervasekolmos Want to go deeper (and get juicy discounts)? Sign up to Gervase's newsletter: https://www.gervasekolmos.com/ Connect with Erin Claire Jones: humandesignblueprint.com Book: How Do You Choose: A Human Design Guide To What's Best For You At Work, In Love and In Life

Jul 28, 2025 • 33min
I AM a Multidimensional Woman
Let's be real: the world doesn't need another "put-together" woman who's mastered pretending. It needs you—whole, honest, luminous, messy, intuitive, powerful-as-hell you. That's why we're bringing back this special episode -- straight from the Vault! G goes all in—sharing raw personal stories and client transformations to show you the sacred evidence of what's possible when you stop hiding parts of yourself. Light and dark. Joy and rage. Fire and softness. All of it belongs. This episode is your reminder (or wake-up call) that being fully expressed isn't a luxury—it's your lifeline. Especially if you're navigating mental health shifts, heavy relational dynamics, or the never-ending mental load of modern womanhood. Here's what you'll walk away with: What it actually means to lead with your heart How to feel more grounded in your truth—even when life feels like a lot Why emotional range = personal power A new definition of "strength" that lets you breathe easier A soul check-in: Are you living the Woman Way… or still shape-shifting? Hit play now. Let it land. Let it stir you. Then share it with the women who need it. And if it moves you? Come join the Phoenix Revolution. We're not here to play small anymore. Get More Support To Create Your Masterpiece Of A Life CREATRIX: a 4-day on-demand for the woman who wants to reconnect to and amplify the feminine magic and empowered mindset that allows you to easily create everything you want in your life. You are not the same every single day. And while you can become outwardly successful with values like perfectionism, discipline and hustle—I can show you a better way. An easier way Inside this four-day on-demand course, you'll learn: What keeps us stuck in cycles of shame, self-doubt, over-doing and feeling disconnected from our whole Woman and how to connect back to Her. The role conditioning plays and how to undo it. How to use your Creatrix magic to let go of your death grip on control and invite in more joy, pleasure, connection, presence. A process for breaking cycles of toxic narratives and life patterns. An empowered mindset that allows you to trust yourself more. And so much more… https://www.gervasekolmos.com/creatrix More Free Resources Download Gervase's free gift, the Trust Yo'self hypnosis track: https://bit.ly/3xKuaPv Connect with Gervase on Instagram: www.instagram.com/gervasekolmos


