A Little Bit Culty

Anne Peterson, former Landmark Forum staffer and author of Is This a Cult?, reveals leaving a large group awareness training and building survivor support. She describes burnout, shame hangovers, and the loss of a community. She explains how leaders manufacture compliance, how jargon conceals harm, and why recovery centers on consent, mistrust repair, and safer models for personal growth.

Anne Peterson, former Landmark staffer and program leader who wrote Is This a Cult?, returns to recount life inside Landmark's training machine. She describes long days, unpaid labor framed as service, and pressure to recruit. She breaks down language games, emotional high/low cycles, and how transformational claims masked high‑control dynamics.

In Part 2 of our conversation with Priya Hutner, we keep pulling back the curtain on life inside the Kashi Ashram and the world surrounding Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati (“Ma”), including what happens when devotion, hierarchy, and silence collide. Priya continues sharing her lived experience growing up in and around the ashram and how spiritual ideals were often used to excuse harm, blur boundaries, and shut down questions. We talk about the normalization of control and coercion in spiritual communities, the pressure to reframe pain as growth, and what it’s like to realize—years later—that what you were taught was “love” or “service” didn’t actually feel safe.We explore the long tail of cult recovery and religious trauma, especially for those raised in high-control spiritual environments where obedience was spiritualized and dissent was discouraged. We reflect on the complicated legacy of Ma, the culture of the ashram, and how charismatic leaders and closed communities can create conditions where harm goes unchecked. Priya’s honesty adds to an essential conversation about accountability, healing, and reclaiming your voice after leaving a group that once defined your entire world.Be sure to check out Priya’s book launching March 3, 2026, Chasing Nirvana: A Seeker's Story of Love, Loss and Liberation, and follow her on her website, Instagram, or Facebook.Also…let it be known that:The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.**PRE-ORDER Sarah and Nippy's newest book hereCheck out our amazing sponsorsJoin A Little Bit Culty on PatreonGet poppin’ fresh ALBC SwagSupport the pod and smash this linkCheck out our cult awareness and recovery resourcesWatch Sarah's TED Talk and buy her memoir, ScarredCREDITS:Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony AmesProduction Partner: Citizens of SoundCo-Creator: Jess TardyAudio production: Will RetherfordProduction Coordinator: Lesli DinsmoreWriter: Sandra NomotoSocial media team: Eric Skwarzynski and Brooke KeaneTheme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel AsselinSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Priya Hutner, a writer and former long-term member of Kashi Ashram, shares her captivating journey through a seemingly serene spiritual community led by Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati. She reveals how the initial allure of service and enlightenment transitioned into experiences of spiritual abuse, humiliation disguised as ego-death, and strict control over life within the ashram. Priya discusses the impact of daily rituals, the complexity of collective living, and her eventual awakening to the dynamics that shaped her life. Her memoir, "Chasing Nirvana," promises deeper insights into this compelling narrative.

Jared Van Driessche, a survivor of childhood abuse in a high-control religious environment and an executive protection expert, shares his harrowing journey. He discusses the impact of parental and emotional abuse, and the struggle to heal while navigating a faith that prioritized belief over safety. Jared sheds light on how he transformed his trauma into a career protecting others and his upcoming film project about breaking cycles of family pain. He encourages fellow survivors to seek help and challenge stigmas around vulnerability.

Jared Van Driessche, a former cult kid turned executive protection specialist, shares his harrowing childhood in a Baha'i offshoot under his father's authoritarian rule. He contrasts the religion's ideals of unity with the abuses he faced at home, detailing how he navigated a toxic environment of secrecy and fear. Jared opens up about the severe impacts of childhood trauma, including forced rituals and grooming, and reflects on the complexities of his parental relationships. His journey highlights the need to break intergenerational cycles of abuse.

In this engaging conversation, Shelise Ann Sola, an ex-Mormon and creator of the Cults to Consciousness podcast, shares her journey of leaving the LDS Church and navigating life afterwards. She discusses the reclaiming of body and sexuality, the challenges of healing from religious trauma, and how her creative work—like memes and TikTok—helps build community. Shelise also dives into the controversial realms of ayahuasca experiences in Peru and the importance of self-care after intense discussions, all while exploring what it means to find personal spiritual grounding.

Shelise Ann Sola, a former Latter-day Saint and creative force behind the Cults to Consciousness podcast, dives deep into her journey of deconstruction from Mormonism. Growing up in a strict LDS environment, she faced intense pressures from modesty culture and purity messaging that left lasting impacts on her identity. Shelise shares her revelations about temple rituals and the psychological control exerted by the church. Now, she channels her experiences into humor and storytelling, helping others navigate their own paths away from high-control religions.

In Part 2 of our conversation with Elicia Ybarra, she unpacks her path to healing through EMDR trauma therapy. She realized how buried triggers from years of grooming and abuse sabotaged her marriage and self-defense curriculum development, leading to a near-separation and inability to be touched even by her son. She broke down her "Pretty Hands, Hard Punches" empowerment model. We also discussed why stats show 975/1000 sexual assault perpetrators walk free, the red flags of abuse, multi-layered boundaries (emotional, time, social), and the "think, yell, run, fight, tell" progression with simple, realistic strikes like palm heels to the nose (tested by board-breaking!).Elicia shared red flags for parents: how to check for safe martial arts schools (check one-star reviews, watch instructor interactions, run background checks via Academy Safe, avoid MMA locker-room culture), how unquestioning obedience grooms kids to ignore gut instincts, and practical family rules like no adult secrets with children and always respecting "no" to hugs.Be sure to follow Elicia on her website, prettyhandshardpunches.com, or on Facebook or Instagram @prettyhandshardpunches.Trigger warning: This episode contains frank discussion of sexual assault statistics and low conviction rates, trauma triggers/panic attacks, strangulation, and stalking/harassment.Also…let it be known that:The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.**PRE-ORDER Sarah and Nippy's newest book hereCheck out our amazing sponsorsJoin A Little Bit Culty on PatreonGet poppin’ fresh ALBC SwagSupport the pod and smash this linkCheck out our cult awareness and recovery resourcesWatch Sarah's TED Talk and buy her memoir, ScarredCREDITS:Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony AmesProduction Partner: Citizens of SoundCo-Creator: Jess TardyAudio production: Will RetherfordProduction Coordinator: Lesli DinsmoreWriter: Sandra NomotoSocial media team: Eric Skwarzynski and Brooke KeaneTheme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel AsselinSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In Part 1 of our conversation with martial artist and empowerment self-defense instructor Elicia Ybarra, we trace how a childhood love of ninja turtles and karate turned into a 30-year journey through grooming, coercive control, and abuse in multiple martial arts settings, and how she eventually turned all of it into a curriculum to help other women fight back before it ever gets physical.Elicia described being groomed by a trusted instructor from ages 13–16, losing her community when she tried to set boundaries, getting pulled into a second “family” TaeKwonDo organization where a grandmaster weaponized rank, money, and humiliation, and how those patterns set her up for an extremely violent relationship she barely escaped. She walked us through the turning points: postpartum depression, COVID, therapy, watching cult docs (shoutout, The Vow), quitting smoking, and finally building “Pretty Hands, Hard Punches” and an empowerment self-defense model that starts with boundaries, intuition, and situational awareness—not just throat punches and palm strikes.Be sure to follow Elicia on her website, prettyhandshardpunches.com, or on Facebook or Instagram @prettyhandshardpunches.Trigger warning: This episode contains frank discussion of sexual abuse, statutory rape, workplace sexism and harassment, intimate partner violence, and suicide.Also…let it be known that:The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.**PRE-ORDER Sarah and Nippy's newest book hereCheck out our amazing sponsorsJoin A Little Bit Culty on PatreonGet poppin’ fresh ALBC SwagSupport the pod and smash this linkCheck out our cult awareness and recovery resourcesWatch Sarah's TED Talk and buy her memoir, ScarredCREDITS:Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony AmesProduction Partner: Citizens of SoundCo-Creator: Jess TardyAudio production: Will RetherfordProduction Coordinator: Lesli DinsmoreWriter: Sandra NomotoSocial media team: Eric Skwarzynski and Brooke KeaneTheme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel AsselinSUPPORT OUR SPONSORS:You’re going to love Hungryroot as much as we do. For a limited time, get 40% off your first box PLUS get a free item in every box for life. Go to Hungryroot.com/culty and use code culty.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.