Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens

Surprise!I am excited to be popping in to encourage, inspire and INFORM you about the how and the why to creating a PARENTING VISION.Listen to this short solo show and then move into action!Our parenting vision is our COMPASS and what keeps us moving in our desired direction within our relationships with our children.Click here for the Parenting Vision Guide.Have a beautiful day! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Jason Frelot. Jasen is a community organizer, father, early childhood educator and social justice advocate based in Seattle, WA. Along with directing Columbia City Preschool of Arts and Culture, he is the co-founder of Kids and Race Seattle, which has been featured inParent Map Magazineand on NPRs Seattle Affiliate KUOW; the program has served over 500 people to date and rising every month. His various actions around race and social justice have made front page news in Seattle and have been featured on local news numerous times. He has 15 years of working with children in various capacities.“What we are going for here is real change. What we are going for here is a real conversation that is messy. That means diving deeper into that discomfort.”What you’ll hear in this episode:•   Racial identity and the inherent problems with color blindness •    How we are teaching white children to be racist and brown/black children they don’t have value (even though we don’t mean to) •   How to respond to uncomfortable questions about race and social order •   Silence and it’s role in reinforcing the status quo •   The role of parenting in promoting diversity •   Equality vs equity – what’s the difference? •   Treating everyone the same and how it perpetuates inequity •   Acknowledging the reality of now: the problem with discussing racism as history and other’s people’s problem •   Achievement gaps vs opportunity gaps •   Fear of being labeled racist and how it detracts from race focused conversation. •   Acknowledging racism as a problem in order to address it •   Understanding white privilege – situational power, structural power and individual power. •   The relationship between privilege and struggle – how they can both be present •   Race as an ongoing conversation •   Impacts of opting out of race-focused conversations due to the magnitude of the issue and the responsibility to persevere •   Recognizing your role in the problem and in how to fix it •   The role of media in how our children view the world and the value of other people - what kids see and what they hear: which impacts children more in the conclusions they draw about the world •   Analogy and allegory vs. representation and conversation in media •   Role modeling respect in our relationships •   Consciously exposing children to diversity •   Equipping our teachers to have conversations about race •   How to be the squeaky wheel about promoting diversity •   Silence as violence: choosing to be uncomfortable and vocal to incite change •   Handling pushback and using criticism as an access point to empathy as an allyResources: Culturally responsive teaching and the brain Kids and Race ResourcesWhere to find Jason: Columbia City Preschool of Arts and Culture, a brand new, social justice based program. Now enrolling for this Spring, and the upcoming school year. for more information go to columbiacitypreschool.orgKids and Race: Changing the Narrative. March 11th at Epiphany. Tickets available. Contact for future events and information kidsandrace@gmail.com.Speaking opportunities: kidsandrace@gmail.com The Well Queen Anne:::::::::: Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Carrie Anne Killeen is a Conscious Parent coach who specializes in assisting parents in increasing peace, love, joy, grace and ease in the home. After living 20 years with a very critical view of herself and those around her, she realized how much love had been missing from her own childhood. Using her children as her biggest teachers, she learned how to heal her own childhood wounds with love, compassion, forgiveness and inner truth. She is deeply dedicated to creating a more peaceful world for children and parents. Carrie Anne inspires parents to see beyond their children’s behaviors to see the hidden truth and wisdom that lies inside their heart and soul. Carrie Anne is a peaceful, single mom of three amazing and highly soulful daughters. She is currently living her heart’s dream in Massachusetts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Full-time parents Natalie Christensen and Nathan M McTague are the founders of the Center for Emotional Education, with the mission to neurally empower individuals and families through emotional and strategic support. They offer a comprehensive line-up of courses, one-to-one coaching support, and Feeleez - a full set of emotional education tools. Natalie and Nathan have been working for over a decade helping families and individuals feel better, do better, and become the best possible versions of themselves. Their next mini-course – Forget Everything Else: The 5 Do-or-Die Parenting Concepts, starts February 13th.websites:Center for Emotional Education.comNathan M McTague.comFB pages:Your Self-Fulfilling LifeParenting on the Same TeamThe Father FactorFB groups:Teaching Children EmpathyThe Empathy Hotline ::::::::::Join the Joyful CourageTribe in our community Facebook group - Live and Love with Joyful Courage. Raising our children while growing ourselves... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Patty Wipfler is the Hand in Hand Parenting Founder and Program Director. Her 40 years of work with parents and children has given rise to Parenting by Connection, a simple but powerful parenting approach that nurtures the parent-child connection. Her Hand in Hand team trains parent leaders in the US and 10 other countries, and offers accessible support for the vital work of parenting. With co-author Tosha Schore, she has written the book, Listen: Five Simple Tools to Meet Your Everyday Parenting Challenges. And Her Listening to Children booklets have sold over 800,000 copies in English, Spanish, and 10 other languages. She is the mother of two sons, and grandmother to three.What you’ll hear in this episode:•   Active listening and how it helps people notice how they feel about their own experiences•    How being listened to and being able to sort through feelings can help activate problem solving.•   The impact of our own childhood experiences on how we perceive challenges in our children’s lives•   Parenting by connection and its relationship with positive discipline.•   Influencing and using presence, setting limits to encourage better behavior.•   How to hold space for your child who is emotionally elevated and let them deal with big feelings•   Letting your child feel the feelings and its impact on the healing process•   The size of the trigger relative to the depth of hurt – helping your child navigate big feelings•   Emotional upset as efficiently releasing tension•   Listening partnerships and how they can alleviate parenting stress and facilitate better parenting•   Emotional projects: ongoing parenting challenges and how to address themWhat does Joyful Courage mean to you?Joyful Courage is a human being’s birthright to be joyfully courageous. Joyful courage means to me what a one year old will sometimes do to pull themselves up so they can stand up next to a table or as a toddler is trying to walk across the room it’s like they don’t care what happens, they are just going to try it and they are proud of themselves as they do it. I think it’s the attitude towards life that we are born with, that we get to keep if we aren’t hurt too badly. Sometimes you have to work on hurt to get your birthright back.Resources: Listen: 5 simple tools for meeting your every day parenting challenges Where to find Patty:Hand in Hand Parenting i Instagram l Facebook l Twitter l Youtube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Marcilie Smith Boyle, a certified positive discipline trainer and certified life and leadership coach who teaches positive discipline courses live and online, coaches individuals and groups on transitions and parenting, as well as life coaching and executive leadership coaching. We are discussing the science and research of positive discipline. Join us!“ The tip of the iceberg is what you can see – that’s your child’s behavior, but underneath the surface so much more is going on.”What you’ll hear in this episode: Emerging neuroscientific research about social psychology informed by function MRIs and PET scans. Principles of positive discipline – looking underneath behavior to build skills for long term better behavior. •   Adlerian theory, the foundation of positive discipline  The connection between behavior and a sense of belonging  How mutual respect informs better behavior The right to dignity and the value of solutions relative to rewards and punishments  Intrinsic motivation, what it is and why it matters long term. The social nature of humans and how that relates to theories of the hierarchy of needs The link between physical and social pain and the connection between learning and belonging The impact of fight or flight on empathy, learning and problem solving skills Relatedness, competence and autonomy and the way they influence behavior and feed intrinsic motivation The positive outcomes of met psychological needs in relation to health, creativity, persistence, flexibility, adjustment, well-being, enjoyment, cooperation, engagement and interest. Why rewards and praise sometimes backfire: the relationship between contingent rewards, autonomy and behavior Baby steps to deepen your positive parenting practice The difference made when we get eye to eye with our kids For more show notes, visit our website here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Thank you to everyone who chimed in for this month's Ask Casey episode! I chose this particular submission because I believe it is something that MANY of us are challenged by. Enjoy!From Mama Kay:Defiance. My six year old has recently started saying straight out No's to anything I ask. ANYTHING! I've tried explaining why I ask her to do things and even explain how it benefits her. But it's just no. It's many times in a disrespectful and rude way. I think she is just finding her boundaries and her self confidence but I do not know how to interact with her. I don't want to bulldoze over her feelings or bully her into obedience. But I also don't want her to be disrespectful or be an example of disrespect to her younger siblings. Along with the no is an ability to find something negative about everything. I've had to ask her to go to another room many times because she was affecting her siblings attitude too. I am praying this is a stage but I don't want to break or break her through the process.Tune in to hear my response! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Melissa Brown, a blended family podcaster who works with stepfamilies. We are going to talk about blended families and the challenges they face. Join us! “Raising children is the biggest rollercoaster ride of your life.”What you’ll hear in this episode:  The biggest challenge facing blended families today Dealing with drama while protecting kids from triangulation The value of a child-centered approach when navigating difficult relationships with exes The importance of self-awareness, love and patience in creating a positive environment for kids. How to use problem solving tools you use with your kids with your exes to improve relationships Learning to identify what you can’t control and how to deal with that The mixed blessing and additional pressure of sibling rivalry on blended families and how to handle it How to empower your kids for conflict resolution in blended families and learning to stay out of it, resisting the temptation to “fix” things Protecting your relationship from blended family drama Bonding with step kids – particularly teenagers – keeping an open mind. Finding an entry point for building connection Flexibility and scheduling in blended families Routines and rituals – creating a sense of belonging Consistency between houses, managing energy and big feelings. Leveraging patterns in your blended family – approaching problems with curiosity Dealing with (and expecting) setbacks and recovering when things don’t go as planned  What does Joyful Courage mean to you? It takes a lot of courage to blend a family – it’s not always an easy journey. Joyful courage to me means understanding the importance of finding joy even through the pain in life. Our biggest growth and our biggest lessons always come from hard times. Where to find Melissa:Blended family podcast l Facebook l Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Ross Greene, an acclaimed author and parenting educator who works with kids with behavioral challenges. We are discussing how collaborative, proactive problem solving can reduce parenting challenges. Join us!“Kids have information we badly need. If we don’t get that information we are at risk of plunging forward with uninformed solutions based on what we think is going on. Our theories and assumptions are often wrong. If you get what’s the matter wrong, your solution won’t work. The least fallible source of information is the kid.”What you’ll hear in this episode: The role of problem solving in managing challenging behaviors  Why sticker charts and rationing of privileges doesn’t work for this demographic Making collaborative and proactive solutions work for your family Changing your mission: finding out what is getting in your kid’s way The benefit of a skills based approach – coaching skills improvement through problem solving The difference between control and influence Parenting and education as partnering and helping Collaborative vs unilateral problem solving Prioritizing unmet expectations to plan proactive problem solving Getting out of the heat of the moment in your parenting  Three steps to proactive problem solving The need for realistic, mutually satisfying solutions The danger of too many solutions Differentiating between a failure and a solution that wasn’t mutually beneficial, realistic or incomplete The messy but crucial nature of problem solving Perfection vs improvement over time – being realistic about goals Focusing on the right thing: learning to focus on the root cause of behavior vs the behavior itself.  What does Joyful Courage mean to you? There is courage that comes along with being a parent, a teacher and a staff member and doing something different because what you are finding is that what you are doing now isn’t working. I’m delighted to say that there are many many parents, educators and facilities who have had that courage and they have been remarkably helpful to their children, their students and the children in their care and that should bring them a great deal of joy as well. It takes courage to take a look at what you are doing, think about it, and try to do something differently.Resources:The explosive child Lost at School Lost and Found Raising Human Beings The Drilling Cheat Sheet The B Team – Facebook Group Elevate Your Parenting – Facebook Group Lost & Found – Facebook Group for Educators Lives in the Balance – Facebook Group for Clinicians Where to find Dr. Greene:Lives In the Balance Facebook Twitter Centre for Collaborative Problem Solving Dr. Ross Greene Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Lauren Gamble of Bibs for Kids. She helps kids struggling with illness, impoverishment and prematurity by selling bibs and donating 10% of proceeds to causes. Her son was born premature and she was inspired to help others after spending time in the NICU with her new baby. Join us in learning about how to give back to kids in need this holiday season (and every day)!What you’ll hear in this episode:•   Life in the NICU – the challenges of prematurity with even a healthy baby, infant health challenges, bonding with other parents facing the same circumstances and 12 long days where time seemed to stand still•   Causes Bibs For Kids supports: premature birth, pediatric HIV, pediatric cerebral palsy, childhood hunger, childhood cancer, and autism•   Prematurity awareness – the selection of this cause was influenced by her own experiences with her son (who is now 4 months old) and the ongoing relationships she’s had with fellow NICU families from their stay•   Pediatric cerebral palsy – the family connection to this challenging disease and how her relationship with her cousin and aunt led her to want to give back in this way•   Pediatric HIV – the family Lauren knows who adopted an HIV positive child and how their life experiences impacted her decision to support this important cause•   Autism – Awareness of early detection and the need for education and intervention are so key to positive outcomes for children living with Autism•   Childhood cancer – 720 kids diagnosed every day in America – why research and awareness is so important•   Childhood hunger – a cause that’s closer to home than we think and not just an overseas problem•   Customer response to Bibs for Kids, donations and partnerships•   The holiday season: thankfulness for good health and a reason to give•   Ways to help when you don’t have kids who wear bibs or don’t have babies in your life– donate $5 and have a bib sent to a child in needWhere to find Lauren:Facebook I Website I Instagram I Twitter I Pinterest ** Check out the Bibs for Kids KICKSTARTER campaign and make a DIRECT IMPACT on this important work!!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices