Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens

Today’s guest is Jennifer Griffin. Jennifer is the mother of four, has her masters in counseling psychology with 30 years of experience guiding children and adults on their relationship journeys. Jennifer is a DIY maven, specializing in leading individuals to uncover the messages in their chronic health conditions and their children’s challenging behaviors. Join us! What you’ll hear in this episode:-Simple, yet powerful techniques to heal at home-Taking back your power after trauma-What is EMDR and how can it help you heal?- How our kids behaviors can mirror our own unexpressed feelings and frustrations-How acting out can relate to our own inner struggles- The iceberg of behavior and how that relates to our children’s behavior and the way they channel their parents frustrations- Resisting the urge to “fix”- Understanding generational patterns- The role of balancing chakras in your child’s behavior-How claiming our authenticity and expressing our emotions can change how our kids express themselves through their behavior Resources:Channeling QuestionnaireEmbracing your child’s tantrums as a gift - Elephant Journal article Where to find: Understanding Morning Sickness as a Gift Understanding Your Child as a Spiritual GiftFacebook | Twitter  | Website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Solo show – sharing from personal experienceRecap what is happening with my teenager If you listened last year, you heard the struggle Online school Clients I’ve worked with Friends confiding in their experience What the stats say My experience of finding information What my gut tells me The ways the world has changed Why it’s so hard Weight of fear/possible outcomes Lack of control Our own stories PD is belonging and significance Power of perception What do we do when something feels “wrong” without giving message that they need to be fixed The challenge of meeting them where they’re at My experience with this…. Not knowing what this means The dance of acting/fixing vs validating/being The iceberg Tip of the iceberg They won’t talk, can’t identify what’s “wrong”, tears, withdrawal, aggression/defiance/anger, shut us out Grades/friends/activities Bad after school special Under the surface Hopelessness/fear/not know what or how they are feeling Feelings of disconnection Out of control Anxiety/depression The range…. Not all or nothing Grey areas Our own beliefs about mental health My experience, looking back I was afraid to call it what it was because it made it true My upbringing of not using things (family drama) as a “crutch” messaging Enmeshment/codependency I am going to get really vulnerable and highlight something that I see showing up because of the dynamics that are currently alive in my family My experience with needing approval – give me the gold star, tell me how great I am Wanting it from my family, especially my dad and step mom Now noticing that I am searching for it from my daughter NO BUENO Getting spiritual Carolyn Myss My experience of energy work in the context of my relationship with Rowan Life happens for us, so…. This is an experience that is happening for me? For Rowie?  Acknowledging my controlling tendencies and the message it sendsLetting go/backing offHaving a plan (with school) about what I will and won’t do with a requestTreatment Counseling, naturopath, energy work – this is what WE are doing You do you. Make choices for your kids. Listen to your kids. Listen deeply. Hear without fixing Ask permission Give them space and trust they will come to you Don’t be afraid to go big if things feel really off Ask hard questions GET SUPPORT TALK TO EACH OTHER Quit dismissing teens by saying “everyone feels that way” because even if it’s true this is not what they need to hear – they NEED to feel seen and heard Check your expectations at the door, accept that this is a part of your parenting story Take care of yourself Check your codependency GET HELP – if your gut tells you that what is happening with your child is extreme, seek help. I say this to you and to myself. We will get to the other side of this, my friends. And only we get to decide if we get to GO through this time of our lives, or if we GROW through it.Thank you to all of you parents of teens, those of you who are personal friends who have been brave enough to be in conversation with me, clients, listeners – you are not alone. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Debrena Jackson Gandy, a best-selling author of three books, a keynote speaker, a world traveler, a transformational coach, a thought-leader, a sacred self care expert, relationship coach, founder of Juicy Woman University and The Love Academy. We are discussing creating juicy lives for ourselves. Join us!What you’ll hear in this episode:-Pampering the mind, body and the spirit-The nourishment of the spirit and why it matters-Why the first 9 years of life are so important to our beliefs-Getting past our own default mode-The guilt that comes from tending to self and martyrdom-When you feel bad about being good to self-The Sacred Self-Caring lifestyle vs. the lifestyle we inherit through default-Satisfaction, joy, ease, peace and flow: how to find it-Finding a new default for sacred self-care-The difference between the being and the doing - and the exhaustion that comes from all the doing-Division of responsibility for children within the home between parents - joint responsibility-How mothering behavior can block fathering and shared parenting-Being the architect of our own lives-When your “thought ware” isn’t aligned with being the architect of your own life-Baby steps to getting back into alignment-Debugging our programming-How beliefs impact attraction-The path to transformation-Getting curious about beliefs to make changes-Morning rituals for prayer and meditation-Discerning God’s voice from your inner self talk-The importance of asking in prayer-Understanding our own greatness and how that impacts our ability to live our birthright Resources:Free Gifts from Debrena’s websiteDebrena’s books, courses and moreWhere to find:Website | Facebook | Twitter  | Youtube Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Returning to the practiceWhat Positive Discipline is to me…. Belong significance Iceberg Encouragement Kind and firm Presence/seeing/listening  What I have learned over time My own beliefs get in the way Fear manifests as control and rigidity Trust is the theme of my life What it means to have a practice Taking care of me Exploring worthiness Developing intention Modeling what I want Returning to the basics Check assumptions Read and learn about development! What speaks to you??? So many people and programs…. What/who makes sense to you? Where do you feel seen? Things to keep in mind There is no perfect Spirituality/energetics matter – this is bigger than me Its messy, not formulaic Blame serves no one There is no end point Finding a sense of peace inside of the chaos is life goals Comparing is not useful – ever You are the parent your child picked, not because you are perfect, but because you are you. Parenting is an opportunity to heal old wounds, to mend relationships, and grow as an individual, if you let it be Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Kim Muench. She is a JAI Institute for Parenting certified parenting coach who works with moms of preteens and teenagers. She is the mother of 5 kids ages 13-31. She writes about conscious parenting, provides one on one coaching and workshops to help support moms towards intentional parenting. We are discussing detaching from the outcome. Join us!"I want to help shift the consciousness of the way that we’re parenting, especially our teenagers.”“We want to give them opportunities and choices. But you absolutely have to have some boundaries and structure in place.”“What do we stand for? What do we value? What do we try to instill in our kids?”“You cannot give what you do not have.” “These bumps is where we grow character.”“You can be right or you can be in relationship."What you’ll hear in this episode:-When children arrive at adolescence- The balance of boundaries and relationship building with our teens- Choosing your battles- Defining your family values- Setting an example for your kids- Defining non-negotiables- Ways to offer choices to your teenager- Detaching from the outcome- Prioritizing personal care and personal development- The illusion of control- Individuation and what that can look like- Supporting our kids in making better choices with alcohol- Being okay with kids failing or things taking longer- Trusting vs hovering - learning to detach- Taking a long view to your relationship with your kids Resources: Episode 82: Tweens and Smart Phones Where to find:Website FacebookTwitterFacebook Group Real Life Parenting Community  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

SOLO SHOW!!Woohoo – how is YOUR back to school? This episode acknowledges what we are all going through as we support our kids and ourselves in coming back to a back to school routine.I know, it is hard to shake off the summer. But that is what is happening. I share about my own experience with sending off two kids to two very different school settings, and what is coming up for me as they navigate the transition.And the navigation is still VERY MUCH ALIVE!! I mention tools and strategies for finding peace and flow, or at least dull the roar of making this shift, and I am so happy you are listening in!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Heather Chauvin. Heather Chauvin has been named the next generation’s thought leader in parenting and women’s leadership. Her mission is to crack women open to their deep potential. Heather is a TEDx speaker and the creator of the Mom Is In Control podcast and has been featured on the OWN network, Huffington Post, TV outlets and others. With wit and wisdom, Heather inspires a global community of women to take back control of their lives and evolve how they want to lead, work, play and parent. We are discussing mindful meditation. Join us! "There was always this contrast of who I wanted to be in the world versus who everyone else thought I should be." “We can’t get our children’s respect unless we respect our children and deeper than that, we need to learn to respect ourselves.” “Mindful meditation to me means awareness. Simple awareness.” “Really, it’s about doing less.” What you’ll hear in this episode:- The importance of mindfulness for parents and kids- Sustainable ambition theory - Survival Mode, Momentum, Thrival Mode- Learning to live outside of survival mode- Meditation as a tool in parenting and life- Why it’s easier to teach a child to meditate than an adult- Co-creation as mindfulness- Mindfulness for older kids- Parenting as emotional growth on steroids- The value of quiet- Listening to your child without trying to fix them as mindfulness- Giving yourself permission to let go of how things look- The responsibility of personal growth and the intergenerational impacts What does Joyful Courage mean to you?Being yourself, simply put. Being yourself and having the courage to figure out who that is and what that feels like and just keep going after the things that light you up, because that’s joy and it’s going to be uncomfortable to do that. Resources:Heather’s TEDx talkTeach Your Kid To Meditate Where to find Heather:WebsiteMom is in Control PodcastInstagram Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

SOLO SHOW – woohooLet’s talk about intuition today…. Well, I am going to J Connecting dots with Eps 154 Dan Siegel interview The ability to sift through the experience you’re having and everything that is calling inside of you – and create space to show up as our best selves We all have an inner knowing, inner voice – where we can tap into deep wisdom Making sense of our spiritual experience Finding intuition while navigating my parenting How conditioning supports/gets in the way How do we tease apart intuition from fear/conditioning/doubt “What if the first hit is true?” “What if our stories and experiences are offered to us to develop our intuition?” Growing our “hub of awareness” requires practice PRACTICE MATTERS Becoming an outside observer takes practice We move towards what is familiar Sacred Contracts Caroline Myss Trust What happens when we choose in to the practice of developing space for our intuition? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Doctor Dan Siegel. Dan is a clinical professor of Psychiatry at the UCLA school of Medicine and the founding co-director of the Mindful Awareness Research Centre at UCLA. He is also the Executive Director of the Mindsight Institute which focuses on the development of Mindsight, teaches insight, empathy and integration in individuals, families and communities. Dr. Siegel has published extensively for the professional and lay audiences. We are discussing his new book: Aware: The Science and Practice of Presence. Join us!"The most important gift we can give our kids is showing up with our mental presence, not just physically being present but to have the state of awareness and open to who they actually are.""Presence is a state of perceptive awareness.""Information is transformation.""You have the ability to cultivate the presence of mind through these very simple and accessible practices that are going to bring health to your body, slow the aging process, reduce stress, all these positive things and the same exact process, developing your hub of your wheel of awareness, presence, can actually deeply enrich the way your child is soaking in his or her relationship with you and developing this experience of being seen, of being soothed, of being safe, of being secure that research shows is exactly what your child needs to optimize how they go out into life, and that's something you're empowered to create."What you’ll hear in this episode:-The wheel of awareness - what it is and how it helps -How awareness impacts your body and health -How being present impacts the speed of the aging process-Wellbeing and how it is enhanced by being present-Relationships with your kids and how being present improves it-Cultivating awareness-Role modelling resilience-How awareness feeds connection vs control-Impacts of a lack of structure on the brain and future of children-Authoritative parenting vs Authoritarian parenting-Why we need the village and how that creates stress for contemporary parents-Finding joy, tranquility and connection through expanding awareness-Flipping our lid, learning from our body's signals and how awareness can help-Monitoring and modifying for self-regulation and to improve responses to stress-The 3 O's what they meanResources:Mind, A Journey To The Heart of Being HumanBrainstorm, The Power and purpose of the teenage brain The Whole Brain Child No Drama DisciplineThe Yes BrainAware: The Science and Practice of Presence The Telomere Effect by Elizabeth Blackburn Where to find Dr. Siegel:FacebookTwitterYoutubeInstagramLinkedInWebsiteMindsight InstituteUCLA Mindful Research Centre Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest is Naomi Gottlieb-Miller. She is a mom, yoga teacher, self-care advocate, Air Force spouse and Star Trek nerd. She is passionate about working with busy moms and empowering them to take better care of themselves so they can re-write the story of what healthy motherhood feels like. She loves to make yoga fun and accessible for everyone she works with. Naomi is passionate about helping people find space for their daily yoga practice. We are discussing yoga, self care and parenting.Join us!"Yoga is not just what you do on your mat but it's how you live your life." What you’ll hear in this episode: Parallels between yoga and parenting Self exploration in yoga and parenting How what we read influences our perception of how we parent Making decisions about what matters to us vs what we "should" do Yoga on social media and competition The five second rule and how it relates to self-care Habit change personality types Yoga as a practice and how it relates to ego The difference between simple and easy Feeling into action and engaging - in yoga and parenting Being with the discomfort in parenting and yoga Therapeutic irritation and holding space and identifying appropriate times for release Creating conscious conversations with our kids Baby steps for starting yoga Starting small as a way to inspire more future What is a mantra and why is it helpful?  Resources:Naomi’s introductory Yoga videos on her Youtube channel NaomiGottliebMillerWhere to find:Website | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | Youtube: NaomiGottliebMillerTransform Chaos To Calm Program Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices