Let's Parent on Purpose: Christian Marriage, Parenting, and Discipleship

Jay Holland and Christian Parenting
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Mar 22, 2020 • 32min

166: The Coronavirus, Anxiety, and Jesus

It seems like every half day there’s a bit of news that changes what the future feels like it’s going to be. I thought we’d take a little bit of a break from the Survival Guide series that I’ve been doing, but today I thought we would just focus a little bit on something that I’ve been wrestling with, which is trying to keep the anxiety and worry down in the midst of the constant barrage of news and updates and the ground moving out from under us. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights We are living in unprecedented times. Things may be terrifying and uncertain and we can become incredibly anxious, but we can find refuge in the Word of God. This year I’ve committed myself to memorizing and meditating on the Sermon on the Mount. I’m at chapter six right now and right in the middle of it, Jesus starts a passage on worry and anxiety that is so appropriate for what we are going through today. One of the reasons for people’s anxiety right now is the economy tanking. It reveals that our hope was set in these treasures that we stored up. Jesus says, “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be.” (Matthew 6:21) If all your hope has been in your financial plan, your heart must be a mess right now. The more you spend time working to acquire treasure in heaven – investing in people, investing the Kingdom of God, that treasure has its eternal reward. Jesus says, “The eye is the lamp of the body. So, if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light, but if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness.” (Matthew 6:22-23)  Right now, we are bombarded with information about the pandemic. If you read or watch the news and reports over and over throughout the day, you are investing in anxiety and worry. Instead, set a time and check the news then. Go about the rest of your day. What you’re watching and listening to will feed your soul. Jesus says do not be anxious about your life. He preached it to severely persecuted and oppressed people in occupied Rome and he tells it to us now. Jesus gives us several reasons why we should not worry: Do not be anxious about food or clothing because your life is more than food and your body is more than clothing. Your life is more than your mortgage and your car payment. It might be hard and unideal, but we will make it through. Look at the birds that God has provision for. If God provides for the birds, He is going to take care of you. Worrying does not extend your life. As a matter of fact, worry shortens your life. In fact, worry robs you of your life right now. God clothes flowers in beauty and splendor. In the same way God will provide for you. You are of more value to God than a weed or flower. The people that don’t know God spend their time worrying about these things. Instead of being anxious, seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness. “Do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself.” (Matthew 6:34) Most of the time that we are crushed by anxiety does not usually have to do with the present, but with worries about tomorrow and the day after that. But if you think about whether God has provided for today, the answer is always yes. There is going to be trouble today. When you realize that you can’t do it all, you aren’t just saved by the gospel, but sustained by the gospel. Our troubles in our daily lives should drive us back to Jesus. Now that many of us may have much more time on our hands, maybe it is a good time to start memorizing Jesus’ words on anxiety. During this time, drive yourself back to God’s word, ask for grace for today, and seek to be a blessing to God and to those around you instead of giving in to worry, fear and anxiety. We’re going to get through this. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Previous episode: The Simple Secret to Family Worship Podcast: Truth Love Parent
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Mar 15, 2020 • 32min

165: Survival Guide God Centered Identity

It’s time to talk about one of my favorite and one of the most crucial subjects in our survival guide series. That’s instilling a God-centered identity in our young men and women here on Let’s Parent on Purpose. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Thank you to this week’s sponsor: The Lake Tahoe Couples Getaway. November 13-16 at the Hyatt Regency on Lake Tahoe. Use this link to let them know I sent you! https://www.tahoecouplesgetaway.com/lpop Show Highlights It is crucial for us and for young people to understand who we are as far as being made in the image of God and to have parameters to understand what it means to be a biblical man or woman. Today, the world is so crazy that it seems like everything is changing so rapidly and it feels like words don’t mean a thing. Truth is so incredibly relative. On social media, young people are constantly bombarded with messages that skew who they are and who they think they should be. Our kids often end up not knowing what they are about and they need a vision and direction. Help your children understand who they are – Are you your job? Your possessions? Your body? No. Center yourself and your children on your biblical identity. Here are three crucial concepts in understanding biblical identity: The most core identity that we have is being made in the image of God. Who you are isn’t centered on what you look like, your talents, nor your family, but on whose you are. Humanity is the crown of God’s handiwork. Your children are the crown of God’s handiwork. With bullying and other outside factors in the society that take a toll on their self-image and self-worth, it may be difficult for them to grasp. But, if they understand this, it will make them secure in their priceless identity. Give your children a vision of manhood. It has nothing to do with what they world and society dictates as manly and macho. This is an image pulled from scripture. What makes for a REAL man? A real man: Rejects passivity Expects God’s greater reward Accepts responsibility Leads courageously Give your children a vision of womanhood. A woman is not second class to men. A woman has equal dignity and equal value as an image-bearer of God. What makes for a REAL woman? A real woman: Rejects worldly identity Expects God’s greater reward Acts with strength and wisdom Loves others boldly. These are things that your children need not only before they leave the house, but as early as middle school. Constantly remind them that their core identity is that they are made in the image of God and being a real man and real woman comes with the reward of God. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Resource: Men’s Fraternity
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Mar 8, 2020 • 35min

164: Survival Guide: Biblical Literacy

For our children to believe and follow the Bible, they are going to need to be able to understand the Bible. Today I cover the sixth key principle in our survival guide for young people: Biblical Literacy. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Biblical literacy is not just being able to read the bible. It’s understanding what the bible is about. Foster a robust foundation and understanding of what the bible is so that you and your children can have confidence in it. This is important because it is God’s word and the bible says the word of God is living and active. The bible is not just one book. It is a collection 66 books written by 40 different authors over a span of about 1,000 years! It was inspired by the Holy Spirit, through the words of men. The bible has so many different types of literature – poetry, prose, letters, allegory – and it could be difficult if you don’t understand the context. It is the story of God from many different human perspectives, but also a unified story of the redemption by Jesus of a people of God. There are several resources that you can use to instill biblical literacy in your children. Among those that I’ve found useful are: 66 Books in the Bible – a super catchy song that will help them memorize the books of the bible. The Bible Project – one of the most powerful tools for older kids to adults. They have a seven to ten minute animated overview of every book and themes of the bible. The Radical Book for Kids – a good resources for talking to especially inquisitive kids who have questions about faith. The Jesus Storybook Bible – is great for younger kids, covering all the major stories from the old and new testaments and it ties all the stories back to Jesus. Blazing Trees – you can find several helpful resources including a series of stick figures drawings that can help teach bible stories and bible themes. Your children can also draw their own bible stories with stick figures and you’ll be surprised how easy it becomes for them to recall the story based on their drawings. Kids today are less and less familiar with the bible. The younger your kids memorize the books of the bible, the easier it will be for them to explore and study it. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday: Text THINGS to 66866 Song: 66 Books in the Bible Website: The Bible Project Book: The Radical Book for Kids Book: The Jesus Storybook Bible: Every Story Whispers His Name Website: Blazing Trees
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Mar 1, 2020 • 31min

163: Survival Guide: Moral Boundaries

One of the most important tools our children can leave our house with is a wise set of moral boundaries. That’s going to be the topic of our time together today as I continue my survival guide series. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Thank you to this week’s sponsor: The Lake Tahoe Couples Getaway. November 13-16 at the Hyatt Regency on Lake Tahoe. Use this link to let them know I sent you! https://www.tahoecouplesgetaway.com/lpop Show Highlights What is the real reason why our children should want purity? It’s not enough to just tell them that they need to do it. Understanding the reason behind it is what will really ensure that they will pursue purity in a meaningful and lasting way. Like in the previous episode on Wise Choices, we reiterate that a wise person makes moral judgements and installs moral guardrails before feelings get turned up high. Guardrails are put up so we don’t fall of the side of a cliff. In the same way, in our lives there will be times that you are HALT – hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. At these times, your temptation level will be higher than normal. Hopefully, before that happens, you’ve been able to put up your moral guardrails already. The things that you take pleasure in are created by God. If you eat something delicious, marvel at that fact that God created everything from the ingredients to your taste buds that help you experience this pleasure. God created sex and knows about it more than anyone. He’s the one that created it for your pleasure and ultimately it should be something that causes us to worship God for the wonder and majesty of what he created. But there is something even better than sex – that’s intimacy. Intimacy is the joy of knowing someone and being fully known without fear of rejection. We have a deep longing for intimacy with each other and with God. Sex and intimacy are connected. Sex is not just something physical, but something that is primarily relational. Our children live in a culture that teaches otherwise. Help young people establish guardrails to live by: The further you go, the faster you go. The further you go, the further you want to go. The further you go, the harder it is to go back once you’ve crossed some boundaries. Where you draw the line determines three things: The arena of your temptation The intensity of your temptation The consequences of giving in to your temptation Great sex is a byproduct of maximum intimacy. Purity paves the way for intimacy. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday: Text THINGS to 66866 Previous episode: Survival Guide: Wise Choices
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Feb 23, 2020 • 35min

162: Ellen Martin: Hard Conversations

You cannot have meaningful growth in your family without having hard conversations. Today I’m joined by Ellen Martin, author of A Life Shared: Meaningful Conversations with Our Kids. We talk specifically about how to leverage difficult conversational topics into real growth points in your family life. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Thank you to this week’s sponsor: The Lake Tahoe Couples Getaway. November 13-16 at the Hyatt Regency on Lake Tahoe. Use this link to let them know I sent you! https://www.tahoecouplesgetaway.com/lpop Show Highlights Ellen Martin, author of A Life Shared: Meaningful Conversations with Our Kids, founded the ministry, A Life Shared, to empower, equip, and encourage others in their walk with Jesus. With illustrative vision, practical tools, and space to respond, Ellen offers a diverse, unique speaking ministry. As a life coach, she joins others to facilitate good work in their own lives. Twice graduate of Asbury Theological Seminary, Masters of Art in Christian Education and Master of Divinity, Ellen lives with her husband and five sons in Kentucky. What conversations are you having with your kids? There’s a difference between what you tell your kids and what you actually share, like what you would do with a peer in a conversation. Real conversation is just sharing life with one another. It’s talking about things that interest you, things you love, and things that matter to you. Try to find that place with your children. Think of the way Jesus discipled – it was by telling stories in the context of what the people he was talking to would understand and relate to, not by just telling them what to think. Hard conversations are conversations that no one wants to have. They are the awkward conversations, ones that we want to put off or evade, but you know deep down you’ll have to face them somehow. Sometimes, you just don’t know how to answer the question. Be mindful that while you may have a lot of emotional baggage attached to certain topics, a child might just simply be asking an honest question. For them, it may not be loaded with emotion. There are a few tools that you can use to tackle difficult conversations with your kids: Be honest. It may seem obvious, but it is very important. As parents it’s really easy and sometimes more convenient for us to be evasive. Being honest might mean having to share a hard reality with your kids. If you think the topic is too heavy for them at the moment, be honest about it. Tell your kids it’s not something you think you they are ready for now, but when the time comes, you will talk about it. Keep it simple. Answer as briefly and succinctly as you can. Kids are pretty straightforward and you should be too. If they need to know more, they will ask more. This will also help them engage more in a good conversation.  Use terms that make sense to them. Try to see things from their perspective. Instead of assuming, ask your kids what they mean by the question they are asking. Turn the question into a meaningful conversation and you’ll really understand where they are coming from. Present the facts. The facts are not burdened by emotional baggage or external motivation. You can present the facts then discuss how they make you feel, but don’t assign feelings to other people because you don’t know. Also make sure that you don’t speak for others. Only present the things you know for a fact. Be honoring, not just honest. In all your conversations, be motivated and led by love. Create a safe space for your kids to come to you with anything that is on their minds.   Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday: Text THINGS to 66866 Ellen’s website: https://alifesharedwithkids.com Ellen’s book: A Life Shared: Meaningful Conversations with Our Kids
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Feb 16, 2020 • 38min

161 Survival Guide: Spiritual Disciplines with Hunter Wheatcraft

You may have never used the term “spiritual disciplines” when thinking about the way that you’re raising your children, but I guarantee that you have been instilling them in their lives, over the course of the last several years. Today I’m joined by my good friend and co-pastor at my church, Hunter Wheatcraft and we talk about ways to instill spiritual disciplines in different age groups, all the way from elementary through college aged students. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Thank you to this week’s sponsor: The Lake Tahoe Couples Getaway. November 13-16 at the Hyatt Regency on Lake Tahoe. Use this link to let them know I sent you! https://www.tahoecouplesgetaway.com/lpop Show Highlights Spiritual disciplines are the practices we need to do regularly to have a healthy spiritual life. These include prayer, reading the Bible, and being engaged in the church community, among others. Instilling these disciplines in younger children can be challenging because they are still developing their relationship with Jesus at the same time. But, just the act of planting these gospel seeds and building these habits that they will carry on into adulthood is valuable. Today’s culture of instant gratification, it might be hard to think of the process of developing discipline. But, strengthen your and your kids’ spiritual muscles is a long-term endeavor. Remember, what you feed will grow, what you starve will die. If your children are having a difficult time growing their relationship with Jesus, try examining what they are feeding their spiritual life with. What music are they listening to? What shows do they watch? Who do they follow on social media? If they are starving themselves spiritually, you shouldn’t expect that they will have a hunger for the things of God. There are so many ways to strengthen that relationship with God and you can approach it different ways, depending on the interests of your child. Whether they are into music, art, or sports, you can incorporate worship and service into it. To incorporate spiritual disciplines in your life, go about it the same way you would develop any other good habit. Pair something new and maybe challenging, like daily bible reading, with something pleasurable, like having hot chocolate or coffee with it. Start small. Instead of starting your kids with the longest prayers, pick something short, something that will hold their attention. Keep doing this as you build their spiritual muscles and develop the craving for these good spiritual habits. Eventually, the routine itself will become the reward. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday: Text THINGS to 66866  
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Feb 9, 2020 • 30min

160 Survival Guide: Wise Choices

Today on Let’s Parent on Purpose, we’re going to talk about how to encourage our children to walk wisely in a fool’s world as I continue my Survival Guide series on the most essential things that we want our young people to know before they leave our house. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Thank you to this week’s sponsor: The Lake Tahoe Couples Getaway. Sign up before Valentine’s Day and you can receive a $100 discount per person on this amazing couples retreat November 13-16 at the Hyatt Regency on Lake Tahoe. Use this link to let them know I sent you! https://www.tahoecouplesgetaway.com/lpop Show Highlights Think about all the decisions your child will have to make throughout their lives. Our world today is so different from the one that we grew up in and everyday our children are faced with influences that will make them question their faith. That, and dealing with hormonal changes of adolescence, will grow different feelings in them as to what they want to do in the moment. Ephesians 5:15-17 tells us: “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of time because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish but understand what the will of the Lord is.” As they go out into the world, there are several evils that our children may face, especially drinking and wildfire sexuality – and in our culture that celebrates that everything goes, those two are often combined. These both may seem appealing to our growing children, but as parents, we have to remind them that getting out of bounds with alcohol and sexuality is in contrast to the Lord’s way. It’s foolishness and there will be consequences. Do this by pointing out examples of the terrible consequences of alcoholism and overt sexuality. Remind your kids, “You get to choose to be a wise person. A wise person makes moral judgments and installs moral guardrails before their feelings get turned up high.” When the feelings are up is a really bad time to make decisions. Think of it as driving on the side of a mountain without guardrails. That would be terrifying. The guardrail keeps you from danger. Help your children establish guardrails and boundaries – even before they find themselves in a high-emotion situation. When they are younger, we set the parameters for them as parents, but as they start to get older and have more relationships, instead of telling them what to do, you want to make sure that you are asking them, what are your guardrails? What are your standards? Guide them, but let them own it. As a parent helping your child walk wisely in a fool’s world, keep in mind the following – both for your child and for yourself: Jesus makes the dirty clean. You may have done or thought of some unclean deeds, but you don’t have to live in them, they don’t have to identify you. Jesus frees the slaves. You don’t have to do the things that you used to do once you put your faith in Christ. You don’t have to be bound by decisions you’ve made in the past. Jesus lives as Lord. He rose again from the grave proving that he is the Son of God. If you submit yourself to the Lordship of Jesus and if you live as his servant, following his way, there’s going to be paydays along the way. Living for Jesus has a cost, but it also has immediate rewards, intermediate rewards, and eternal rewards. May Jesus bless you and your family along the way. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday: Text THINGS to 66866
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Feb 1, 2020 • 22min

159: Survival Guide: Others First

Today I’m going to cover the concept of considering others before yourself. For something that sounds so simple to say, it can be one of the hardest practices to master in life. It’s also my second topic in my survival series where I cover the core principles that your child needs to master before leaving your home. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights It may seem counterintuitive, but considering others before yourself may be the best survival strategy there is and something important to instill in your children. Think back to when you were younger. We all have experiences of being too afraid to stand up for kids being bullied. Sometimes we’re not mean, but we wouldn’t put ourselves out there for people we can’t gain from. Talking with your kids about it in the first person, based on examples from your own life, makes it very relatable. We naturally put a lot of effort into self preservation. We associate based on perceived status. If someone has money, looks, connections, and we think associating with them is going to get us ahead, we tend to overlook major character issues in their life and major warning signs. We want to associate ourselves with them whether they are of quality character or not. We distance ourselves from potential threats – not just people who will directly hurt or harm us, but also people who by association will get us laughed at or made fun of. They may be good people, but we will not come to their defense publicly. We make the mistake of self-promotion instead of genuine self-sacrifice. In our social media obsessed world, we tend to post our good deeds online. Will you still do good deeds even if no one knows about them? If it’s just a matter of evolution, survival of the fittest, this would work. However, our faith in the teachings of Jesus commands us to do the opposite – to not self-preserve, but to look out for those around us, to count out others more significant than ourselves. Life others up, humble yourself, because God will lift you up. If your faith is true: Be united in your outlook. Be others-first in your actions. Be Christian in your attitudes. Model how Jesus put others before him. Teach your kids to think about what they are doing and how it affects others. In your own house, leaving dishes in the sink, leaving toys out, leaving your chores undone are examples of not considering others. It’s not just laziness, but selfishness, but not thinking of the other person. Point your children towards Christ. One of the ways you show that you belong to Jesus is by being considerate and thinking of others more than yourself. Character is revealed not by what we do when everybody’s looking, not by what we do when there’s rewards, not by what we do when we’re going to advance because of it, but by what you do to the people from whom you have nothing to gain. It’s a simple concept, but one that is so powerful that it will transform your life and the life of your children. Giving your life away is the greatest survival strategy that you could possibly have. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday: Text THINGS to 66866
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Jan 26, 2020 • 32min

158 Survival Guide: Meaningful Friendships

When your child has graduated and now they’re out of your house, sitting on their bed in their dorm room or apartment, what are the key principles that you pray are driven deep into their soul? Today, I’m going to begin a series that 12 most important principles that will help our children go beyond survival and thrive in a turbulent world. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights One major core principle your children should possess is knowing how to make meaningful friendships. Help them understand that our friends determine the direction and quality of our lives. We naturally walk, talk, dress, and think like the people we are with most often. Sometimes it’s healthy to step back and get some perspective. Ask your kids to reflect on the question: Do I like the composite of who they are becoming? Because that’s who I’m becoming. Finding a church community that is vibrant and really supports your child could light their life on fire. Without spiritual friendships, you’ll realize how lonely it could be. As it says in the Bible, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” Talk to your children about the warning signs of people they may want to avoid. MADGAS, inspired by Proverbs 20, is an acronym that helps identify toxic friendships and relationships that can end up ruining your child’s life. Manipulator – These are people who are good at getting you to do what you shouldn’t and don’t want to do by guilting or shaming you. As parents, also make sure that you’re not being a manipulator to your child. Addict – Addiction destroys humanity. It destroys those who might have once been caring, loving, and generous. Addicts become incredibly self-centered and other become commodities to them. Continue to have conversations with your children about substance abuse in terms of the destructive outcomes it can bring about. Deceiver – These are the liars, those who are not trustworthy. Help your children understand that if they will lie to other people, they will probably lie to you. Lying breaks relationships. Gossip – There are people who feel better about themselves by tearing everybody down. If they gossip with you, they will gossip about you. As a parent, make sure that you aren’t gossiping in front of your child as well. Arguer – The arguer is more concerned with appearing right than they are the people around them. They are a big drain on energy. Slug – People who have a poor work ethic and just sit around and wait for everybody to serve them. Be mindful if you are carrying the load in the relationship. Avoid MADGAS and avoid being them as well. If your child identifies these toxic relationships among their friends, there are two things they can do: Diversify. You don’t need to be around the same people all the time. Dilute. Add new people to your friendship group to change the dynamic of the group. On the other hand, JETPACKs will launch you and uplift you. This stands for people who are: Joyful, Encourager, Trustworthy, Peacemaker, Active, Christ-centered, Kingdom-minded. Encourage your children to be the kind of friend that they want. Be a blessing to others. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday: Text THINGS to 66866 Free Audio Books: freeaudibletrial.com/letsparentonpurpose Book: How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
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Jan 19, 2020 • 32min

157 How to Disciple Your Children

The concept of discipling our children can sound very intimidating. There’s no end to the volumes of books and programs that have been created to help us make disciples. But sometimes all the books and programs bring confusion rather than clarity. As I think through the discipleship of my own children, I begin to think of how Jesus made disciples. My brainstorm quickly grew to a list of 25 ways that Jesus made disciples. Ironically, the larger the list grew, the more encouraged I was. I want to share it with you, because it will help you realize that You are in a better position to disciple your children than anyone else in the world. You’re already doing most of the things Jesus did to make disciples. If you’re interested in support Let’s Parent On Purpose as it reaches moms and dads around the world, consider joining our Patreon Support Community If you’d like help with changing the conversations in your household, text the word THINGS to 66866 to get a copy of my Fun Family Conversations Ebook! As promised on this podcast episode, here’s my list of 25 ways that Jesus made disciples: How did Jesus disciple people? Spend a lot of time with them over several years Slept in the same places where they sleep Ate with them Let them see His personal walk with God Went to celebrations with them Went on walks with them Told them stories Worked and played together Encouraged them when they did well Confronted them when they were going the wrong way Showed patience with them when they just weren’t strong enough Showed weakness in front of them and let them help him Asked them a lot of questions Gave them tasks that were beyond anything they had done to that point Went to religious meetings with them Read scripture with them and discussed its meaning Served other people with them Talked about the things of God in informal times Showed them how to do things Let them do things that He was better at than them Showed his full range of emotions around them Prayed for and with them Laid down His life for them Preached the gospel to them Empowered them to carry the word and work of God into the world Look at that list. You’re already doing many of these! And it wouldn’t take much effort to add some of the others. Discipleship is Life on Life. Keep on discipling your children, and take joy in the journey!

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