Let's Parent on Purpose: Christian Marriage, Parenting, and Discipleship

Let’s spend a little time together today thinking intentionally about the culture that we create within our household for our families. My guest today is Joel Montgomery and he helps us with crafting a vision and a strategy for family culture. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Joel and his wife Elaine have been married for 10 years and have 3 kids: Sofia Grace, Julia Joy and Mateus. Over the past 12 years, Joel has been helping for-profits, non-profits and churches around the world to create an authentic culture that turns their people into a passionate tribe on a mission. Most recently, Joel has applied his expertise of culture to the family, founding Family on Purpose with his wife Elaine. They teach parents with young children how to focus their limited time on what is most important so they can live more purposefully together. Having a family culture starts by sitting down together and creating a family purpose and establishing your family’s key principles. Then, look at your family’s habits and  identify intentional practices that all of you can do to live out your collective purpose. Joel breaks down the process: Purpose – the future that you want for your family; why you do what you want to do. Principles – the core elements that are most important to you; the truth you believe as a family and what you want to be known for in the world. Practices – habits that enable your to live out your family’s purpose and principles on a regular basis. While it’s much easier to set the foundations for a family culture when your kids are young, it’s still important to start doing this no matter where you are in your family journey. If you want to establish your family culture and already have older children, involve them in the process. It’s an opportunity for them to engage in what the family is about. The more involved your young and old kids are in forming your family culture, the more they will hold each other – and you – accountable for living it out. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Free Digital Download: 10 Tips to Do Family on Purpose Online Course: Create a Family Culture Blueprint in 7 Days Instagram: Joelrmontgomery Website: joelrmontgomery.com

Today I’m joined by author and speaker Laurie Christine Ressler as we talk through ways to engage your children in family devotions. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Laurie Christine Ressler writes devotional Bible stories for families. As a mom of four young boys, she understands how important it is for parents to connect with their children while communicating the truth of God’s Word to them in a way they can understand. With degrees in Creative Writing, Biblical Studies and Education, Laurie has more than twelve years of experience in teaching the Bible to young children as well as writing Sunday School curriculum for her local church. She also serves as the Administrator for the Christian Writers Institute. Laurie’s passion is to equip parents with the resources they need to create Christ-centered connections with their children. There are a number of reasons why many families – even the most spiritual – do not spend time for family devotions regularly. Most of us are too tired at the end of the day, or you feel like you don’t know the Bible well enough to teach your children, or the kids are just too chaotic. But, creating the family devotions habit does not have to be intimidating. Start small, even with reading just one Bible verse together. Then, talk about what it means to you and to each one in the family. What do you learn about God from the verse? Here are some creative ideas for starting family devotions: Go through a devotional book or children’s Bible stories. Make sure your kids are engaged while you read them together. Read with expression. Be passionate in what you are sharing with your kids. If you are excited about it, your kids will be excited about it. Tap into things that your kids already know about the Bible stories. Make them tell the story or contribute what they remember about it. Let that dig deeper into the story. Have your kids draw or act out what they know and remember about the stories. Learning is reinforced by involving all their senses. Connect the stories to real life. Always end by talk about what you learned about God from the Bible stories. Don’t put pressure on the family to do your devotions every day, at a specific time. There is no formula for how you have to teach God’s word to your children. You will not transform your children in one single moment, but it is the consistency of coming together for the devotions that will make a difference. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Health care ministry: samaritanministries.org Family Devotions Resources: https://www.LaurieChristine.com/family-devotions/ Website: www.LaurieChristine.com Laurie’s books: www.LaurieChristine.com/books

If your home is like mine, you’ve seen an uptick on the amount of time on screens and devices as we’ve all self-isolated. Today I’m joined by Neal Harmon, co-founder of the streaming service VidAngel. We talk about the challenges and resources for parents navigating all of the media choices for our children. Neal brings a lot of wisdom and some encouraging options to help our families. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Neal Harmon is the CEO and co-founder of VidAngel, a streaming service that allows parents to skip objectionable content in entertainment using ground-breaking technology. VidAngel has been highly-profiled for The Chosen, its original series about Jesus and the #1 crowdfunded media project in history, and its other incredible family-based content like Dry Bar Comedy. VidAngel recently made headlines by offering all of its streaming content free during the COVID-19 pandemic, provided people agree to social distancing of course. Now that everything is being done at home during the lockdown, many parents are relaxing their policies on screentime. Regulate this by setting good expectations. Schedule your family’s media time for the week together. Before giving younger children devices, set up a contract with them, setting the parameters to using them to help them manage device fatigue. Making a pre-arranged agreement removes a lot of stress because you’ve talked about it in advance. Having several children of different ages in the family can create difficulties when it comes to choosing what to watch together. What works for Neal’s family of nine children is scheduling two movie nights a week at their home, one where the group of older kids and group o younger kids get to choose what they want to watch separately, and one family night where they can find something to watch together. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Website: VidAngel Show: Dry Bar Comedy Show: The Chosen Show: Some Good News Show: Never Failed Show: Hello Ninja Show: Spirit Riding Free

Do you remember when you were young and your mom and dad used to tell you to watch your tone? I think that’s a reminder that I’ve needed in these last few days of being around family members non-stop – not to remind my kids to mind their tone, but to remind myself to watch my tone. That’s what we’re going to talk about on today’s Let’s Parent on Purpose. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Tone matters. When we think about communication there is content and context. In some cases, the context can mean even more than content. Depending on how you say something, it can vastly change the meaning of your message. Especially during this time when most of us are at home with our children all day, we need to pay special attention to our tone. As a parent, your tone helps set the standard for the tone that is used by everybody else in your household. Proverbs 15 says: “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” When dealing with your children, think about de-escalating heated situations instead of answering with an angry outburst. Answer gently so that they may change their tone as well. Tone is also important when you are reading God’s word. Think of the inflection of your voice, whether you are reading to yourself or to your children. Your tone will influence the way listeners receive the message of the loving God. Ultimately, you get to choose your tone. It will help affect how you feel about a situation and convey that to those around you. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Daily prayer: Morning Prayer

Sometimes as a parent, we can worry that the decisions we make or even one bad decision might wreck our children for the rest of their lives. Today I am joined by someone who has become a dear friend. Hunter Wheatcraft has served as Children’s and College Pastor at our church for the last three years here at Covenant Fellowship Baptist Church in Stuart, Florida while he completed seminary at Palm Beach Atlantic University. This is his last week with us, as Hunter and his bride Anna are heading to Texas so she can pursue her masters degree. They’ll leave a deep hole in hundreds of hearts in South Florida. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Hunter is a steady, faithful man of God who loves Jesus and others so well. But you would have never dreamed he would turn into such a solid man based on his childhood. Today we talk about Hunter’s life. I want you to be encouraged that you don’t have to get everything right as a parent. God redeems horrific parenting, and he can redeem our follies as well. Sometimes, as parents, we fear that our children’s decisions will change the rest of their life for the worst. But, it is naive to think that we know that trajectory. Trust that the Lord has a plan for your children’s lives. No decision they make will be outside the goodness of the Lord. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866

This is a bonus edition of Let’s Parent on Purpose, especially for all of you moms and dads that found yourselves thrust into the role of homeschool overseer on top of all the other things you’re trying to reorient in nearly every area of your life right now. I’ve got one major word for you today: relax. Join me as I speak with Christian counselor and veteran homeschool mom Eliza Huie for a few moments of encouragement before you rush back into all that you’re carrying. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Eliza Huie is the Director of Counseling at McLean Bible Church in Virginia. She and her husband Ken have three grown children and a wonderful daughter-in-law. Eliza balanced homeschooling and work-life for several years while their kids were growing up. Eliza’s first piece of advice? Take a deep breath, relax. Realize that we are all figuring this out at the same time, together. Manage your expectations. You are not expected to create a school in your home. Aim to help your child retain what they have already learned in school, not start a whole new curriculum. Your kids may not remember the academic worksheets and drills that you do. They will remember and appreciate the stories you read, the activities you do, and the time you spend together during this time. It is a great opportunity to instill what we really want them to take away from this unique period in their lives. Let your day work for your family. Don’t feel restricted or pressured by regular school hours. Homeschooling gives you the chance to consider yourself and your child and the best times of the day for learning. Consider each family member’s needs, including your own. Allow time for work and play. Don’t forget social time. If they can call a friend or connect online, schedule that into their day. If at all possible, try to take a short walk with only one child at a time. Talk to them about how they are coping. Let them ask you questions without having someone barging in and interrupting your heart to heart conversation. Look at this time as an opportunity to build a relationship with your children in a unique way. It is an opportunity to parent in a different way than you’ve been doing before, but you are still parenting on purpose. Remember that even without realizing it, your children have been learning from you all their lives. They learn from what they observe from you and how you communicate and connect with them. Beyond textbooks and school, life lessons are some of the most important things they learn from you everyday. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Article: Suddenly Homeschooling? 9 Ways to Help Keep Your Sanity Podcast: Focus on the Family

Today I have a dear friend joining me from Spain where he and his family of six have been in lockdown for more than three weeks. He’s going to help give us wisdom and counsel on how we might set ourselves up to thrive spiritually, physically, and emotionally, while also having realistic expectations for ourselves and those around us as we continue to navigate Covid-19. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Virgil Tanner has been married for 20 years and is a father of four. He and his family have lived on three continents and he is currently based in Spain where he oversees strategy and global operations for a non-profit with hundreds of staff scattered all over the world. It is possible to thrive in lockdown. It is possible to thrive in uncertainty. You can thrive spiritually by: Withdraw – Allow yourself to pull away from the people you are on lockdown with and from distractions to create space where you can listen to Jesus. Gather – Jesus touches us when we gathered. Find ways, with social distance, to connect with people so you can connect deeply with Jesus, together. Obey – Listen to God’s call, obey, and reflect on what you’ve learned from obeying Him. Health is incredibly vital during the lockdown. You can thrive physically by: Eat – Be intentional about what you put in your body. Boost your immune system with vitamins and minerals. Move – Have a regular movement practice with active intentional action. 30 minutes of high intensity exercise every day is the best way to fight depression and anxiety. Recover – Notice your energy levels and get the right amount of sleep, not too much and not too little. Right now, adjusting and coping to our new work and life situation can be more tiring than usual. Be intentional about giving yourself more time to rest. You can thrive cognitively and emotionally by: Learn – Keep your brain active by presenting your mind with something novel. Focus – Be selective about when you are going to think of certain things. Know when not to put things in your head and the kinds of things that you shouldn’t put in your head. This also makes space for you to feel necessary feelings. Play – Schedule play into your day. We are at our most human when we are at play. It helps to play together as a family. Most importantly, be intentional about lowering the bar for yourself during this challenging time. Right now, everyone’s capacity is diminished. Try hard to do yourself, but cut yourself some slack. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Virgil’s Youtube Channel: Virgil Tanner

You and I have been given the responsibility to raise children with a faith that’s going to persevere in a culture that is changing faster than in any time in world history. Just think about it. 13 years ago at this point, the iPhone hadn’t even been released yet. I’m so honored to be joined again by my friend AM Brewster, the host of the Truth.Love.Parent. podcast, as we talk about how to equip our children with resilient faith. It’s the next item on my survival guide of how to raise children that will thrive even when they are out of your household as we teach them that God can be trusted. He will do all that He’s promised to do. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights So many things are rapidly changing in our world today, especially with the coronavirus, and one of the most pertinent and relevant topics that we can talk about is living out resilient faith. As our kids grow up, their faith is going to be put through the ringer. They will go through tragedy, disappointments, and failures. Your kids don’t just need to have faith. They need to have a resilient faith. Faith isn’t knowledge. To know something isn’t to believe something. Faith isn’t feeling. Faith is not a version of hope. Most of all, faith is not without an object. It has to be rooted in something. It also cannot be detached from a change in lifestyle. Faith is a conscious choice to accept something as true, even if there is no “proof.” We cannot have eternal life without faith. At the same time, faith is absolutely necessary for everyday life. Faith is a complicated concept and as parents, you have to make sure that your kids have the right understanding of what faith is. Aaron shares different kinds of faith that you might encounter: Damning faith – when faith is confused with knowledge or feeling, and has no object. It is a pseudo faith that leads to death eternal because it is nothing but an intellectual acquisition of ideas. Deceiving faith – this is dangerous because it is not completely false. It is a partial faith that believes in elements of things found in the bible, but misses out on the core things necessary for salvation. Saving faith – a gift of the Holy Spirit bestowed on men called to salvation. Sanctifying faith – everyday life faith that lets you glorify God right now. The more you have this type of faith, the more you grow. How can you cultivate faith in your children? Remember and celebrate the times of God’s faithfulness in the past, not only in the bible stories, but in your own family’s journey. Increase your faith by increasing your obedience. Have faith for the next step and watch how God comes through. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Health care ministry: samaritanministries.org Aaron’s website: TruthLoveParent.com Aaron’s podcast: Truth.Love.Parent. Special Truth.Love.Parent. page: TruthLoveParent.com/lpop Book: Talking with Your Kids about Jesus by Natasha Crain

The Risen Jesus is a Saving King. Of all of the important principles of our survival guide series, this is the heart and the core. This is the essential one that we want to demonstrate in our families, to our kids, and it’s the topic of our discussion today. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights The transforming gospel is one of most important topics that we can talk about. It is the story of Jesus and it is what will most transform our families. We often turn to the Bible to find ourselves in the different figures of the Bible stories. But, remember, we are not the central figure of the gospel. The Bible is about the story of God, from creation to the fall, promise, struggle, redemption, and then recreation. The gospel is about God. The gospel is about God’s promise made through the prophets and the scriptures. It is God’s promise of salvation to you and me. The gospel, at its very core is the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Gospel means “good news.” The gospel is the power of God for salvation. The good news is dynamite – explosive power. The gospel tells us that Jesus paid the full price and it is His power that saves us. The gospel reveals not only the righteousness of God, but also the depth of love for God. Most of all, the gospel is from faith to faith. It is your faith in Jesus that saves you, but more so, it is that faith that sustains you. How does this change your parenting? You need to be able to help your children understand the wide view of the gospel; the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus. Help them navigate the chaotic world with the knowledge that God has always been faithful to His people, even through the worst of times. Even more importantly, be liberated by the notion that you are living the transforming gospel. Because Jesus rose from the dead, you can have grace with yourself and in your parenting. Know that you will mess up and your kids will too, but you can still show them the consistent and persistent love of Jesus. If you can live the transforming gospel in your home, you and your family can rest in the grace of Jesus. Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Health care ministry: samaritanministries.org

God’s will is found in God’s word. In a culture that teaches every person is free to determine their own version of truth and morality, it’s essential to equip our families with an understanding that God’s word is not just an inspirational suggestion book. Today I’m joined by biblical councilor AM Brewster, host of Truth.Love.Parent., and we’re going to talk about the next pillar of my survival guide for children: God’s word as our ultimate authority. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Today’s guest, Aaron Brewster, has been a biblical counselor for over 10 years. The past 5 of those years were spent at Victory Academy for Boys where he worked with at-risk teens and their families. He now works full time as the Executive Director of Truth.Love.Parent. where he writes, speaks, counsels, and hosts its podcast. Truth.Love.Parent. is a ministry dedicated to serving the Lord by equipping dads and moms to be the intentional, premeditated, disciple-making, Ambassador Parents God called and created them to be. Aaron, his wife, and their two children live in a multi-generational home with his parents in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina. Aaron reminds us, all 66 books of the bible are divinely inspired by God. That means that they are valuable to us. It is an extension of God’s character. God’s word is our ultimate authority. Everything that God wants us to know is found in there. Parents should understand that the bible is not a rulebook. It’s an invitation to a vibrant relationship with God, Aaron says. Your children shouldn’t want to obey because of rules, but because they love Him and they want to please Him. Help you children discover God’s will for your lives. Start simple with the clear commands stated in the bible and with scripture. From there, know that the whole bible is the will of God for your life and your children’s lives. Your children should know God and love God. It is their love for Him is going to deter them from sin, not the fear of its consequences. Parenting is just like pastoring. You need to take God’s word and make it understandable and applicable to our audience. Don’t think that you have to reserve a part of the bible for when your kids get older. Rather, find ways to apply the biblical concepts to your child’s experiences right now.   Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Health care ministry: samaritanministries.org Aaron’s website: TruthLoveParent.com Aaron’s podcast: Truth.Love.Parent. Special Truth.Love.Parent. page: TruthLoveParent.com/lpop Truth.Love.Parent. episode: Help Your Child Discover God’s Will for Their Lives