Let's Parent on Purpose: Christian Marriage, Parenting, and Discipleship

Finances are either going to strengthen your marriage or tear them apart. As parents, your family depends on you developing your financial literacy. Raising a child with a disability, Donna Hosanglearned that the more organized they were as a family in their daily lives, especially in the financial lives, the easier it was for them to handle any unexpected crisis that might arise.   Show Highlights Donna Hosang Certified Financial Coach with the Dave Ramsey Financial Group. She’s also is the retired mother of three and member of Covenant Fellowship Baptist Church. Donna and her late husband John navigated multiple unexpected health and family challenges in theirmarriage, including raising a special needs child who is now in heaven. By God’s Grace, they got their financial house in order early in their marriage, allowing them to thrive in situations where many families drown. Donna has a passion for helping families with wise financial planning to protect themselves from Murphy’s Law.   The first step to getting your finances in order is to establish your budget each month and actually write it down so that you know that it is real. Work on this together with your partner. Both should understand what is going on.   But, despite all your planning, there can always be an unexpected crisis, whether big or small. To prepare for that, establish an emergency fund. Donna suggests setting aside $1,000. This will be there for you if you have a medical emergency or an accident, anything outside of the budget. If you know you're prepared for it financially, you'll worry less.   Ultimately, Donna says what will really make you financially stable is getting yourself out of debt –and if you are not in debt, stay out of it.   Tackle your debt by listing everything down, with the smallest debt first. Instead of paying a little of each every month, systematically knock out your debt by paying the smallest in full first, and so on.   To really be able to finish paying all your debt, you will have to make changes in your daily habits. But, know that as a couple and a family, you do this together.   Though it may seem difficult, Donna says, "It doesn't matter how much debt a family has. There is always a way out."   Once you are out of debt, work on accumulating 3 to 6 months of living expenses set aside.   As you get yourself on more stable ground, work on paying down your mortgage. It will give you even more financial freedom.   Then, you can start tosave up for your retirement and your kids' college. This will set both you and your children up for a more comfortable future.   [bctt tweet="It doesn't matter how much debt a family has. There is always a way out." username="jaydholland"]   Resources Mentioned Sponsor: Perfectly Imperfect, Oct 23-24 The Christian Parenting Podcast Network on www.christianparenting.org Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Website: www.daveramsey.com Contact Donna: jmhdmhme@aol.com    If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If youwould like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron.   I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage.   Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email  

You may not even realize this, but Jesus speaks of money more than of heaven and hell combined, perhaps more than any singular topic. In fact, 11 of the 39 parables that Jesus teaches are on the topic of money and finances. Finances often trigger anxiety and stress. From what I've experienced, I've realized: my worry was not fixing my financial situation and I belong to Jesus and He is taking care of me. Today, I want to share five over-arching heart principles on money and finance.

Thanks to our sponsor www.lazybearcabinrental.com. The Lazy Bear Cabin is three bedroom, two bathroom cabin in the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains of Northwest Georgia. Consider this getaway spot as the perfect socially distanced family or romantic getaway. If you know a family who deserves a special vacation, nominate them and tell their story at www.lazybearcabinrental.com to register for a free 3 day, 2 night getaway. Over the years, I've had the chance to pray with parents who are in grief over the current spiritual state of their children who have chosen the path of rebellion. My friend, Shane O'Neill gives a powerful testimony of hope after a long season of rebellion and how his parents were a steadfast witness to him as God brought him back to the faith. Shane O’Neill is the host of The Naked Gospel podcast. He is also the Editorial Director for Proven Ministries, a non-profit, sexual integrity organization that partners with individuals, churches, and organizations to see men, women, and families discover Jesus’ freedom. Shane is currently working on a graduate degree in apologetics at Liberty University’s Rawling School of Divinity.

These days, it's hard to make a distinction between work days and weekends. Many working moms and dads find their weekends overflowing with chores and to-dos, and even recreation that exhausts them, leaving them weary. One of the ten commandments is to "remember the Sabbath and keep it holy" but we tend to ignore this need to rest. Jesus said the Sabbath was a gift that God gave to us, but even I am not very good at receiving that gift. Joy Tanner and her family has been doing a great job at incorporating a regular Sabbath practice in their life. Here's what it looks like to celebrate the Sabbath day with your family and what it can do for your household. Thanks to our sponsor www.lazybearcabinrental.com. The Lazy Bear Cabin is three bedroom, two bathroom cabin in the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains of Northwest Georgia. Consider this getaway spot as the perfect socially distanced family or romantic getaway. If you know a family who deserves a special vacation, nominate them and tell their story at www.lazybearcabinrental.com to register for a free 3 day, 2 night getaway.

Prayer is what gets us close to the heart of God as we shepherd our children's hearts. After more than 20 years of legitimately seeking the Lord, 18 years of parenting, and thousands of prayers, I have realized three fundamental things:   1.There is no manipulation in prayer. We cannot compel the Lord to do anything for us through prayer.   2.There is great mystery in prayer. Sometimes our prayers are answered in a way that there is no human explanation for it.   3.There is spiritual movement in prayer. I have seen the Lord move in hearts when the outside seems totally hard. We cannot change a child's heart, but we can try to shepherd it. So, whenever you feel overburdened and powerless, needing to pray, but at a loss for words, here are four prayers from scripture that you can pray for your family members:   Ephesians 1:15-23 ESV   Ephesians 3:14-21 ESV   Philippians 1:3-11 ESV   Colossians 1:9-14 ESV

Instilling the concept of service and generosity is one of the most impactful things that we do in the formation of our children's character. It is something that definitely must be started in the home and not just at church. Steven Argue talks to us about the practical strategies that will help grow a heart of service and generosity in our children to ultimately make it a way of life. Thanks to our sponsor www.lazybearcabinrental.com. The Lazy Bear Cabin is three bedroom, two bathroom cabin in the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains of Northwest Georgia. Consider this getaway spot as the perfect socially distanced family or romantic getaway. If you know a family who deserves a special vacation, nominate them and tell their story at www.lazybearcabinrental.com to register for a free 3 day, 2 night getaway.

Thanks to our sponsor www.lazybearcabinrental.com. The Lazy Bear Cabin is three bedroom, two bathroom cabin in the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains of Northwest Georgia. Consider this getaway spot as the perfect socially distanced family or romantic getaway. If you know a family who deserves a special vacation, nominate them and tell their story at www.lazybearcabinrental.com to register for a free 3 day, 2 night getaway. Virgil Tanner has been married for 20 years and is a father of four. He has lived on three continents and currently oversees strategy and global operations for a non-profit with hundreds of staff scattered all over the world. For our kids' entire lives, they are going to be confronted by societal complexities that need both the lens of the Gospel and an engaged brain for them to be able to face these issues properly. Virgil and his family have lived everywhere from Nashville to Central Asia and Spain. Because of this, his kids have been exposed to several cultures and have become discerning of what in those cultures are not applicable to their own beliefs. As parents, we should aim to equip our children to hold their own and think clearly, especially when they set out on their own into an environment where everyone is screaming and nobody is thinking carefully before they talk. Keep in mind that it's not a point of inculcating your own beliefs or opinions on your children, but make them strong enough to think and reason out on their own. Identity plays a big role in your child's decision making. If they know who they are and have a strong sense of self, some decisions will come easy. If they know their values and what they stand for, they will also know what is worth their time and energy. Another useful skill you can teach your children to do is to simply notice. See and notice without the need to make an evaluation right away, with the understanding that there are things they do not understand, and notice what they feel about something, and why. The problems our children will encounter in their lives will involve sin. Virgil explains, in the Biblical approach, the primary location of the sin is in the individual human heart, with echoes in the collective and in the systems that humans build. Locating where the evil is in their hearts will empower your children to do something about what is in their locus of control. Let them realize that their actions are under their control and not a result of someone else's actions. They have agency. Get your kids used to the idea of having conversations, not conflicts. Talk to them about the differences between a conversation and a conflict. If there is a winner and a loser at the end, it's not a conversation. If anyone's yelling, it's not a conversation. Conversations are all about understanding each other. Resources Mentioned The Christian Parenting Podcast Network on www.christianparenting.org Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Previous episode: 186: Leadership Development at Home with Virgil Tanner Virgil's Youtube Channel: Virgil Tanner A couple of my favorite videos from Virgil: Lower the Bar & Making Room for Grief and Lament

In a world of unrelenting demands, it can be very easy to spend all of our focus on work and the needs of our children. This laser focus can come at the cost of our own spiritual health, which will then damage every other area of our life. My guest today has spent decades observing the effects of spiritual neglect on the mission field as well as home front. One of his central life callings has been to help those serving in full time ministry tend to the nurturing of their own souls. I'm excited to share with you today a brilliant man whom I also call friend, Dr. Jim O'Neill. Jim O'Neill serves as Director of Mobilization and Leadership Development at Frontier Ventures. Additionally, he and his wife Sterling are the founders of the Next Gen Leaders Conference. Jim and and his wife Sterling have been married for over 38 years. They have 4 grown children, 3 son-in-laws and 4 grandkids. Jim hails from Pennsylvania and Sterling from SC. They met in college in VA. where both were called to missions. Serving together, they each come with 13 years of church planting experience in Asia, 13 years in leadership with two mission organizations, and 8 years ministering in formal theological education and equipping. Because of their passion about multiplying and nurturing leaders, Jim and Sterling founded the Net Gen Leaders Conference. You can find out more at their website here. Thanks to our sponsor www.lazybearcabinrental.com. The Lazy Bear Cabin is three bedroom, two bathroom cabin in the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains of Northwest Georgia. Consider this getaway spot as the perfect socially distanced family or romantic getaway. If you know a family who deserves a special vacation, nominate them and tell their story at www.lazybearcabinrental.com to register for a free 3 day, 2 night getaway.

This is an exciting week for me and the Let's Parent on Purpose Podcast as I am join the Christian Parenting Podcast Network! Let's Parent on Purpose was birthed out of my burden to reach families in my local church. As a 20+ year student and family pastor, I realize that my influence pales in comparison to mom and dad. As I continue to pastor teenagers and shepherd children, every day I feel more convicted to pour into their parents. And while the podcast is focused on parents, the topics range from parenting to marriage to our personal spiritual walks. You just can't parent well if you're neglecting your marriage or relationship with Christ. Parenting is really hard, and at every point we are encountering something else with which we are novices. I have loved hosting this podcast because the topics and guest sharpen me.  Now, by joining the Christian Parenting Podcast network LPOP is part of an even stronger parental support family, able to help more parents across the world with podcasts that directly deal with their parental, marriage, and spiritual needs. As a biological and adoptive father of four, I have experienced such a wide range of challenges, emotions, failures, and victories. I've celebrated my newly adult daughter graduating high school with her Associates. I've also held her in my arms as a little girl and told her that Jesus took her mother to heaven. I've taken my boys on mission trips, and I've also begged God to spare my son's life as we learned he had leukemia. I've made my wedding vows, preached my wife's funeral, and then been graced with an amazing woman I've called my bride for more than 13 years now.  Through all of this, I've served in the church, been carried by the church, and known without a doubt that my family would not have made it without the support of Jesus through the love of the church. I know what it's like to feel lonely and helpless as a parent, and I know what it's like to feel loved and helped. Let's Parent on Purpose is a way for me to encourage moms and dads who are walking through their own unique parenting journey with Jesus. We are better together, and there's nothing in this world that's a better investment of your time and energy than the treasures God has gifted you in your household! Resources Mentioned The Christian Parenting Podcast Network on www.christianparenting.org Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Check out the past podcast archives of Let's Parent on Purpose If you find this podcast helpful, you can  subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called Things for Thursday and it includes things I've found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for Things for Thursday by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email.

Virgil Tanner, my good friend and one of the best leadership development gurus, talks about how to develop your children into leaders, right in your own house. If you find this podcast helpful, you can subscribe  and click here to find past topics and free resources. Feel free to share with others, as well! If you would like to help support Let’s Parent on Purpose, you can do so by becoming a patron. I send a weekly email called “Things for Thursday” and it includes things I’ve found helpful related to parenting, marriage, and sometimes just things I find funny! You can sign up for “Things for Thursday” by joining my newsletter on my homepage. Thank you for your continued support of this podcast. If you have a prayer request or if you have a topic suggestion or question, please contact me at my email. Show Highlights Virgil Tanner has been married for 20 years and is a father of four. He has lived on three continents and currently oversees strategy and global operations for a non-profit with hundreds of staff scattered all over the world. Virgil says, we have to “trigger-proof” our kids. You have to raise a child that can have bad things happen to them or people say mean things to them, and they are mature enough to walk away and be alright. If they are too easily triggered, they can’t become adults or effective leaders in the world today. Cultivate a thick skin and a soft heart. Equip your children with the emotional vocabulary they need to express themselves and they can identify what’s going on with others and are able to address these with words, not by physically lashing out. Develop young leaders with the 70-20-10 rule. Successful development is comprised of 70% experiences reflected upon; 20% guidance and input from other people like mentors, parents, friends; 10% content from books, videos, courses and other materials. Our children will learn more from actual experience than from what other people say and from learning materials they can study. Talking to people about their experiences and giving them materials in support of their experiences can help double or triple their learning. Your kids lives are full of experiences. Address difficult incidents in your child’s life and turn them into a learning experience with these questions: What? So what? Now what? What. What happened? So What. What was significant about it? How are you going to think about it? Now What. What will you do next time you are in a situation like that? As you have the conversation, notice the facts – what are the details of what happened? Discuss how these made you child feel. Finally, notice their contribution to the situation. This focuses their attention on their locus of control. You and your child cannot control what will happen to them in the future, but they can change how they will act in any given situation. These make for a magic conversation that will help make each experience a teachable moment for developing leaders. You can't child-proof the world, so you have to build adults. Click To Tweet Resources Mentioned Things for Thursday and free e-book: Text THINGS to 66866 Book: The Voice of the Heart by Chip Dodd Youtube Channel: Virgil Tanner Recommended Videos from Virgil’s Channel: Lower the Bar; Making Room for Grief and Lament Previous episode: 170: Wisdom for Thriving from a Parent in Lockdown with Virgil Tanner