Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast

Is there something in your life you want to change? I sure hope so, because healthy people are always on the trajectory of learning, and growing, and healing.  Maybe it’s your negative thinking that’s keeping you stuck.  Maybe you find your emotions are overwhelming you with fear, hopelessness, shame, anxiety, or depression.  Maybe you’re struggling in your relationship with God.  Maybe it’s your relationship with food.  Maybe you’re stuck in a pattern of unhealthy relationships.  Maybe it’s behaviors that are sabotaging your life like an addiction or unhealthy habits.  It could be your attitude, your mindset, or your perspective on life that needs to shift.  Whatever it is – in order for change to happen, it has to start from the inside out.  My new book RESET is all about getting healthy from the inside out. It’s a book of 31 practices that will guide you into the process of healing, by giving you practical steps that will transform your life with changes that last.   In honor of my new book, over the next few weeks, we’re diving into different areas of your life that might be in need of a RESET.  We’ll be talking through everything from unhealthy thinking, to your relationship with God, to your marriage, trauma history, body image, boundaries, and everything in between. We’re going on a journey of resetting from our default mode, and learning to do it differently!  ___ In today’s episode, I’m having a conversation with a man named Josh who is really struggling with his negative thinking. He is constantly feeling down and depressed about himself and his situation. I take the time to dig a little deeper, and help him identify that there may be some significant things going on underneath the surface that are impacting his thought life. Tune in to this important conversation about negative thinking. _______ RESET: Powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life is officially available TODAY anywhere books are sold!!! Grab a copy for you and someone you love and let’s begin to DO IT DIFFERENTLY. DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage, True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is there something in your life you want to change? I sure hope so, because healthy people are always on the trajectory of learning, and growing, and healing.  Maybe it’s your negative thinking that’s keeping you stuck.  Maybe you find your emotions are overwhelming you with fear, hopelessness, shame, anxiety, or depression.  Maybe you’re struggling in your relationship with God.  Maybe you’re stuck in a pattern of unhealthy relationships.  Maybe it’s behaviors that are sabotaging your life like an addiction or unhealthy habits.  It could be your attitude, your mindset, or your perspective on life that needs to shift.  Whatever it is – in order for change to happen, it has to start from the inside out.  My new book RESET is all about getting healthy from the inside out. It’s a book of 31 practices that will guide you into the process of healing, by giving you practical steps that will transform your life with changes that last.   In honor of my new book, over the next few weeks, we’re diving into different areas of your life that might be in need of a RESET.  We’ll be talking through everything from unhealthy thinking, to your relationship with God, to your marriage, trauma history, body image, boundaries, and everything in between. We’re going on a journey of resetting from our default mode, and learning to do it differently!  ___ As a Professional Counselor, I spend a significant amount of time counseling men and women (porn is not just a “male” problem) who are struggling with the use of pornography and porn addiction.  The use of pornography is having a detrimental impact on so many individuals and damaging many relationships. It’s time to RESET! In today’s episode, I’m having a conversation with Matt and Sathiya—two men who have found freedom from porn. Tune into today’s important episode about how to RESET from porn, how to get to the roots of the underlying feelings and beliefs that keep you stuck to porn, and how to finally break free. Learn more about hitting the RESET button in this area of your life in my new book, Reset! Or check out my Porn No More Course and Workbook. Matt Cline is the founder and director of Restored Ministries, focused on leading men and women out of sexual bondage and into a life of freedom and impact. Matt is a leading speaker and coach in Canada on the topic of sexual brokenness and has seen countless lives radically changed all around the world. You can learn more about Restored Ministries at www.restoredministries.ca Sathiya Sam is a coach and speaker that helps men live with confidence and integrity. A recovered addict himself, Sathiya is the creator of DeepClean – a research-based and Bible-backed system for overcoming porn addiction and author of The Last Relapse. This work has helped everyone from college students to medical doctors regain control of their lives and walk in greater levels of freedom. Based out of Toronto, Canada, Sathiya is happily married and a die-hard basketball fan. Listen to Sathiya’s podcast, Unleash The Man Within www.unleashthemanwithin.com _______ RESET: Powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life is officially available TODAY anywhere books are sold!!! Grab a copy for you and someone you love and let’s begin to DO IT DIFFERENTLY. DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is there something in your life you want to change? I sure hope so, because healthy people are always on the trajectory of learning, and growing, and healing.  Maybe it’s your negative thinking that’s keeping you stuck.  Maybe you find your emotions are overwhelming you with fear, hopelessness, shame, anxiety, or depression.  Maybe you’re struggling in your relationship with God.  Maybe you’re stuck in a pattern of unhealthy relationships.  Maybe it’s behaviors that are sabotaging your life like an addiction or unhealthy habits.  It could be your attitude, your mindset, or your perspective on life that needs to shift.  Whatever it is – in order for change to happen, it has to start from the inside out.  My new book RESET is all about getting healthy from the inside out. It’s a book of 31 practices that will guide you into the process of healing, by giving you practical steps that will transform your life with changes that last.   In honor of my new book, over the next few weeks, we’re diving into different areas of your life that might be in need of a RESET.  We’ll be talking through everything from unhealthy thinking, to your relationship with God, to your marriage, trauma history, body image, boundaries, and everything in between. We’re going on a journey of resetting from our default mode, and learning to do it differently!  ___ In today’s episode, we’re talking about something you probably haven’t thought about before. Did you know there’s such a thing as being TOO POSITIVE? It’s called toxic optimism. Toxic Optimism is when we use “positivity” or Christian platitudes to bypass difficult feelings rather than allow ourselves to face and feel the difficult things. But what we’re actually doing is burying the trauma, the grief, and the pain — instead of dealing with it. And ironically, when we bury it, we end up prolonging the pain because the best way to preserve something is to bury it.  Today I’m talking with Courtney, who struggles with this very thing. Her whole life she’s tried to be “tough, and positive” and make all the right choices in hopes of pleasing God and the people around her…but she’s at a place where all that is on the backburner because she’s feeling really burnt out. We talk through this today, in a raw and honest conversation about her toxic optimism, where it began, and how she uses it to keep from actually dealing and healing. It’s an eye opening conversation with her, and I think it will be for you as well. It’s time to RESET these different areas of our lives and heal from the inside-out. Tune into today’s important episode about toxic optimism. And learn more about toxic optimism in my new book Reset! _______ RESET: Powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life is officially available TODAY anywhere books are sold!!! Grab a copy for you and someone you love and let’s begin to DO IT DIFFERENTLY. DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is there something in your life you want to change? I sure hope so, because healthy people are always on the trajectory of learning, and growing, and healing.  Maybe it’s your negative thinking that’s keeping you stuck.  Maybe you find your emotions are overwhelming you with fear, hopelessness, shame, anxiety, or depression.  Maybe you’re struggling in your relationship with God.  Maybe you’re stuck in a pattern of unhealthy relationships.  Maybe it’s behaviors that are sabotaging your life like an addiction or unhealthy habits.  It could be your attitude, your mindset, or your perspective on life that needs to shift.  Whatever it is – in order for change to happen, it has to start from the inside out.  My new book RESET is all about getting healthy from the inside out. It’s a book of 31 practices that will guide you into the process of healing, by giving you practical steps that will transform your life with changes that last.   In honor of my new book, over the next few weeks, we’re diving into different areas of your life that might be in need of a RESET.  We’ll be talking through everything from unhealthy thinking, to your relationship with God, to your marriage, trauma history, body image, boundaries, and everything in between. We’re going on a journey of resetting from our default mode, and learning to do it differently!  ___ In today’s episode, I’m having an important conversation with Irene Rollins, pastor’s wife and ministry leader, about her secret battle with alcoholism behind closed doors. Irene battled with addiction for six years before everything came to a head. Her story is eye-opening, because it reminds you of the dangers of hiding and escaping from pain instead of dealing with it. This conversation is so honest and necessary for any of us who might have some things in our life that are moving towards addictions.  Whether it’s screen time, gaming, pornography, alcohol or a substance…addiction is subtle until it’s serious.  It’s time to RESET these different areas of our lives and heal from the inside-out. Tune into today’s important episode! _______ RESET: Powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life is officially available TODAY anywhere books are sold!!! Grab a copy for you and someone you love and let’s begin to DO IT DIFFERENTLY. DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is there something in your life you want to change? I sure hope so, because healthy people are always on the trajectory of learning, and growing, and healing.  Maybe it’s your negative thinking that’s keeping you stuck.  Maybe you find your emotions are overwhelming you with fear, hopelessness, shame, anxiety, or depression.  Maybe you’re struggling in your relationship with God.  Maybe it’s your relationship with food.  Maybe you’re stuck in a pattern of unhealthy relationships.  Maybe it’s behaviors that are sabotaging your life like an addiction or unhealthy habits.  It could be your attitude, your mindset, or your perspective on life that needs to shift.  Whatever it is – in order for change to happen, it has to start from the inside out.  My new book RESET is all about getting healthy from the inside out. It’s a book of 31 practices that will guide you into the process of healing, by giving you practical steps that will transform your life with changes that last.   In honor of my new book, over the next few weeks, we’re diving into different areas of your life that might be in need of a RESET.  We’ll be talking through everything from unhealthy thinking, to your relationship with God, to your marriage, trauma history, body image, boundaries, and everything in between. We’re going on a journey of resetting from our default mode, and learning to do it differently!  ___ In today’s episode, I’m having an on-air session with Erin, who wants to change her relationship with food. Erin is a newlywed who has gained a lot of weight over the past few years, and finds herself defaulting to eating and particularly eating out and indulging in unhealthy foods. She wants to get to the bottom of why she struggles with this, so she can begin breaking this cycle and choosing to be physically healthy. You’re going to love this conversation, and I really believe it will challenge you to begin to get to the root of your default beliefs as well.  _______ RESET: Powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life is officially available TODAY anywhere books are sold!!! Grab a copy for you and someone you love and let’s begin to DO IT DIFFERENTLY. DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage, True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is there something in your life you want to change? I sure hope so, because healthy people are always on the trajectory of learning, and growing, and healing.  Maybe it’s your negative thinking that’s keeping you stuck.  Maybe you find your emotions are overwhelming you with fear, hopelessness, shame, anxiety, or depression.  Maybe you’re struggling in your relationship with God.  Maybe you’re stuck in a pattern of unhealthy relationships.  Maybe it’s behaviors that are sabotaging your life like an addiction or unhealthy habits.  It could be your attitude, your mindset, or your perspective on life that needs to shift.  Whatever it is – in order for change to happen, it has to start from the inside out.  My new book RESET is all about getting healthy from the inside out. It’s a book of 31 practices that will guide you into the process of healing, by giving you practical steps that will transform your life with changes that last.   In honor of my new book, over the next few weeks, we’re diving into different areas of your life that might be in need of a RESET.  We’ll be talking through everything from unhealthy thinking, to your relationship with God, to your marriage, trauma history, body image, boundaries, and everything in between. We’re going on a journey of resetting from our default mode, and learning to do it differently!  ___ In today’s episode, I’m having an important conversation with Alex Seely, co-pastor of The Belonging Co. Have you ever wanted to reset your view of God? Today we’re talking to Alex about the negative view of God that she previously carried and how her past trauma and difficult experiences impacted the way she viewed God for many years — but also how she was able to RESET in this area of her life. So many times we transfer our experiences with others onto our expectations of God. We unpack some of her past, and the steps she took in order to heal, grow, and transform her view of God to what it is today…and what a journey!!! It’s such a powerful and healing conversation for anyone who has been hurt by the people of God — and will really challenge you to consider your own beliefs about God — and WHY.  It’s time to RESET these different areas of our lives and heal from the inside-out. _______ RESET: Powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life is officially available TODAY anywhere books are sold!!! Grab a copy for you and someone you love and let’s begin to DO IT DIFFERENTLY. DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s BOOK LAUNCH DAY!! In this exclusive bonus episode, I’m sharing my heart behind my new book RESET, as well as some of my personal favorite parts of the book. I’m talking you through the concept and idea behind the book, some unexpected twists and turns along the way, and why real change can only happen from the “inside-out”. This is an episode you’re going to listen to, and also want to share with someone in your life in need of a RESET!! It’s not every day you get TWO episodes of the podcast in one day — so enjoy this bonus episode where I share my heart and story with you…and then I say a special prayer for YOU at the end. I love you all, and I am so thankful for your love and support. But most of all, I am so expectant of what God is going to do through this new message – in your life!!! We’re ready for a RESET!!! (Check out my Instagram page today @DebraFileta to follow along on the book launch day celebrations!) RESET: Powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life is officially available TODAY anywhere books are sold!!! Grab a copy for you and someone you love and let’s begin to DO IT DIFFERENTLY.  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Please click HERE to fill out our listener survey Is there something in your life you want to change? I sure hope so, because healthy people are always on the trajectory of learning, and growing, and healing.  Maybe it’s your negative thinking that’s keeping you stuck.  Maybe you find your emotions are overwhelming you with fear, hopelessness, shame, anxiety, or depression.  Maybe you’re struggling in your relationship with God.  Maybe you’re stuck in a pattern of unhealthy relationships.  Maybe it’s behaviors that are sabotaging your life like an addiction or unhealthy habits.  It could be your attitude, your mindset, or your perspective on life that needs to shift.  Whatever it is – in order for change to happen, it has to start from the inside out.  My new book RESET is all about getting healthy from the inside out. It’s a book of 31 practices that will guide you into the process of healing, by giving you practical steps that will transform your life with changes that last.   In honor of my new book, over the next few weeks, we’re diving into different areas of your life that might be in need of a RESET.  We’ll be talking through everything from unhealthy thinking, to your relationship with God, to your marriage, trauma history, body image, boundaries, and everything in between. We’re going on a journey of resetting from our default mode, and learning to do it differently!  ___ In today’s episode, I’m having an on-air session with Felix, who wants to reset from unhealthy relationships. Felix has had a history of unhealthy relationships both before coming to Jesus, as well as after – and he wants to get to the bottom of how to do it differently. We unpack Felix’s story, and trace it back to some old beliefs that he’s been holding onto from childhood – that are coming up in his relationships today. You’re going to love this conversation, and I really believe it will challenge you to begin to get to the root of your default beliefs as well.  _______ RESET: Powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life is officially available TODAY anywhere books are sold!!! Grab a copy for you and someone you love and let’s begin to DO IT DIFFERENTLY. DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Please click HERE to fill out our listener survey Is there something in your life you want to change? I sure hope so, because healthy people are always on the trajectory of learning, and growing, and healing.  Maybe it’s your negative thinking that’s keeping you stuck.  Maybe you find your emotions are overwhelming you with fear, hopelessness, shame, anxiety, or depression.  Maybe you’re struggling in your relationship with God.  Maybe you’re stuck in a pattern of unhealthy relationships.  Maybe it’s behaviors that are sabotaging your life like an addiction or unhealthy habits.  It could be your attitude, your mindset, or your perspective on life that needs to shift.  Whatever it is – in order for change to happen, it has to start from the inside out.  My new book RESET is all about getting healthy from the inside out. It’s a book of 31 practices that will guide you into the process of healing, by giving you practical steps that will transform your life with changes that last.   In honor of my new book, over the next few weeks, we’re diving into different areas of your life that might be in need of a RESET.  We’ll be talking through everything from unhealthy thinking, to your relationship with God, to your marriage, trauma history, body image, boundaries, and everything in between. We’re going on a journey of resetting from our default mode, and learning to do it differently!  As the first episode in our RESET series, I wanted to do something a little special today on the podcast. I had the joy of reading this book on audio myself, and so I wanted to share with you the first few pages of the book so you could hear it first right here before anyone else on the podcast! So sit back and take a listen to RESET: powerful habits to own your thoughts, understand your feelings, and change your life. _______ RESET comes out in just one short week on March 14th! Right now, if you pre-order RESET you’ll be entered to win a $1,500 package of 10 sessions with our counselors network, and get a FREE ticket to our live online seminar called RESETTING FROM unhealthy habits! Just go to DebraFileta.com/RESET to grab your copy and enter your information to get all these preorder bonuses! DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written six books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, and RESET. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Please click HERE to fill out our listener survey Today’s on-air couples therapy session is with Abigail and Daniel, a couple who is trying to balance their every day needs, as well as the needs of their 18 month old first child — and not take out their stress and emotions on one another!! Which is unfortunately how the pattern has been going so far. It’s the fourth and final episode of our February Couples Therapy Series and know you’re going to love this conversation, and likely relate to it in many ways! But is their conflict just about their needs in the here and now? Or is it a little deeper.  You know what I’m going to say — it’s always deeper than what’s happening right here and right now!! I want to help this couple get to the roots, and help them recognize what it looks like to be deliberate about not taking out our feelings, hurts, and struggles on our spouse. And what to do instead with all those real and important needs and emotions.  Tune in to today’s episode of Couples Therapy on the Love & Relationships Podcast and follow the show by clicking on the button below! Be sure to follow and subscribe to the podcast because we have some great things coming up! FOLLOW MY PODCAST AND LISTEN ON Apple PODCASTS BY CLICKING HERE Additional Ways To Listen: STITCHER – SPOTIFY – GOOGLE PODCAST –  iHEART RADIO Get YOUR marriage to a better place!! The Debra Fileta Counselors Network is taking new clients!! Book a session with one of our trained Christian counselors and get started on your healing journey from the inside-out TODAY! BOOK A SESSION.  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written five books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season, Are You Really OK? and Married Sex. She’s also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast answering listener questions about love, relationships, and mental and emotional health. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Want to be on the Love + Relationships Podcast?  Go to truelovedates.com/loveandrelationships/ to submit your question and learn more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices