The Addicted Mind Podcast

Duane Osterlind, LMFT
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Feb 13, 2025 • 22min

TAM+ EP 56: Episode Why Letting Go of Addiction Feels Like Losing a Best Friend

Have you ever felt guilty for missing your addiction, even though you know it was destroying your life? You're not alone. In this powerful episode of The Addicted Mind Plus, hosts Duane and Eric explore the often-overlooked emotional journey of grieving your addiction during recovery. They dive deep into why letting go of addiction can feel like losing a best friend – even when that friend was toxic. Using Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's famous five stages of grief as a framework, they explain why these feelings are completely normal and how to process them without shame. Whether you're in recovery yourself or supporting someone who is, this episode offers vital insights into the complex emotional landscape of addiction recovery and provides practical tools for moving forward. Learn why missing your addiction doesn't make you weak – it makes you human.Download The WorksheetKey Topics• The five stages of grief in addiction recovery: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance• Why missing your addiction is a normal part of recovery• Understanding what you're really grieving (substance, rituals, identity)• How to process grief and loss in recovery without shame• The importance of community support during the grieving process• Practical strategies for moving through grief in recovery• Tools and resources for processing addiction-related griefTimestamps[00:01:06] Introduction to loss and grief in recovery[00:04:00] Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's five stages of grief explained[00:09:54] The dangerous bargaining stage in recovery[00:12:00] Understanding the depression stage[00:15:12] What we're really grieving in recovery[00:18:35] Healthy ways to process addiction-related grief[00:20:33] Resources and support options availableFollow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery CenterNovusMindfulLife.comWe want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmindDisclaimer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Feb 10, 2025 • 35min

320: Addicted To Love with Lacy Bentley

Our guest on this episode of the Addicted Mind podcast is Lacy Bentley, a recovery mentor, and coach in the areas of love and sex addictions for women. At age 13, Lacy found herself consuming erotic novels and pornographic anime called hentai. She didn’t realize it until much later in life, but her involvement with those types of pornography had created an addiction to the fantasy that affected all of her relationships into adulthood. She developed a pattern of escape and avoidance related to any intense emotion – positive or negative – that was affecting her marriage and her relationship with her children as well.Once she realized her own issues, she realized that there had to be other women out there who were struggling as well, but no one was willing to talk about women having problems with pornography. Since so much of pornography involves the subjugation and abuse of women, there is a “girl code trauma” associated with women being aroused by the terrible things that are portrayed happening to other women.Lacy has found in her work to help women find the freedom and recovery that they so desperately need that once a woman is willing to admit her addiction, she is usually all-in to do whatever needs to be done to heal. They need to go through a period of raw and unfiltered honesty about what has happened, then move past the shame that they have been living with for too long, and find their way to reconnecting with their partner healthily and intimately. One of the keys to a successful recovery is opening up and walking through your struggles with your partner, talking about what happened, what works, what doesn’t work, and so on.Women who are struggling with love, sex, or porn addictions need to know that they are not alone. That they are worth recovery and that they have the right to be empowered to be themselves and have the courage to face their problems head-on. Lacy is a strong advocate of the concept of regaining your integrity because integrity is a big part of what is lost during an addiction.Linkslacy@herrecoveryroadmap.comREAL Love Tribe on Facebookhttps://www.facebook.com/groups/417549051983126/www.herrecoveryroadmap.comInstagramhttp://instagram.com/lacyalajna/Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery CenterNovusMindfulLife.comWe want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmindDisclaimer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Feb 6, 2025 • 16min

TAM+ Ep 55: From Shame to Connection: The Power of Authentic Sharing

What if the walls you built to protect yourself have become your prison? In this powerful episode of The Addicted Mind Plus, hosts Duane and Eric explore how sharing our authentic stories can break the chains of shame in recovery. They dive into why many people get stuck in their recovery journey, despite doing "all the right things," and reveal how authentic sharing can be the missing piece. Drawing from both clinical experience and research by Brené Brown, they explain why shame thrives in silence and how connection can be the antidote. The hosts provide practical, actionable steps for those struggling to share their story, making this complex journey more manageable. Whether you're in recovery or supporting someone who is, this episode offers valuable insights into the transformative power of authentic connection.DOWNLOAD THE WORKSHEETKey Topics: Understanding how shame creates isolation and perpetuates addictive behaviors The role of authentic sharing in building shame resilience How to identify and connect with safe people for sharing Practical steps for beginning to share your story The importance of self-compassion in the sharing process Setting healthy boundaries while sharing your story The connection between authentic sharing and sustained recovery Timestamps: [00:01:17] Introduction to shame and authentic sharing [00:02:54] How silence keeps people stuck in addiction [00:05:00] Discussion of Brené Brown's research on shame [00:07:02] The dark room analogy for shame [00:10:19] Practical steps for sharing your story [00:12:17] Setting boundaries around sharing [00:13:51] Resources and worksheet informationEpisode CreditsIf you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery CenterNovusMindfulLife.comWe want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmindDisclaimer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Feb 3, 2025 • 29min

319: Lighting Up The Brain – Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation With Suzanne Jessee

Suzanne Jessee is with us today to talk about Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS). TMS is a relatively new treatment, at least in the United States, for individuals who are struggling with depression. Depression is often present in addiction and TMS is something that may help people that are struggling with addiction and treatment-resistant depression. Suzanne Jesse is the CEO and founder of Anew Era TMS in Huntington Beach, California. To start, Suzanne breaks down what TMS stands for. Transcranial means “beneath the cranium,” and magnetic stimulation means “stimulation using magnets.” The technology behind MRI magnets is used in TMS. But the big difference between TMS and MRI magnets is that the TMS magnetic technology creates a field of energy that is fairly intense that penetrates beneath the cranium into the brain. TMS focuses in on the mood center of the brain that is responsible for the depressive symptoms. That area is stimulated to wake up those neurons again so that they are able to fire efficiently and transmit the neurotransmitters across the synaptic gap more efficiently.For patients that have tried psychotherapy, and medications, and they haven’t seen the results that they are looking for, TMS may be very beneficial. Even though TMS has been used in Europe and Asia for more than 20 years, it is now being used in the United States. This use is mainly due to TMS being approved by the FDA for depression, but it can also be used to treat conditions like PTSD, OCD, anxiety, smoking cessation. It has also been used to address issues like dementia and Alzheimers. This cutting-edge technology has so many different opportunities for treatment that weren’t available before TMS coming to the United States. TMS is completely noninvasive. Patients can drive themselves in, have a 45-minute treatment, and then drive themselves home. The only possible side effects are sometimes a mild headache. Suzanne encourages people to come in for a free consultation and see the equipment. Her team of psychiatrists will do an overall assessment to see if this type of treatment is appropriate for you.Supporting Resources:visit https://aneweratms.com/ Or call (888) 503-1549NovusMindfulLife.comEpisode CreditsIf you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery CenterNovusMindfulLife.comWe want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmindDisclaimer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Jan 30, 2025 • 18min

TAM+ Episode 54: Embracing Imperfection: Breaking Free from Perfectionism in Recovery

In this episode of The Addicted Mind podcast, Eric and Duane dive deep into the often-overlooked topic of perfectionism and its profound impact on recovery journeys. They explore different dimensions of perfectionism, from self-imposed standards to societal expectations, revealing how these can lead to self-criticism and hinder progress. Through personal anecdotes and expert insights, they offer practical strategies for overcoming perfectionism, such as mindfulness, self-compassion, and seeking professional support. This episode is a must-listen for anyone who has felt the weight of unattainable standards and seeks a path to greater peace and acceptance in their recovery.Download: OVERCOMING PERFECTIONISM WORKSHEETJoin Our Deep Dive, where we discuss this episode in depth.Click Here to Join the TAM + Community Waitlist. Get the support you need.Key Topics: Types of perfectionism: self-oriented, other-oriented, socially prescribed Psychological impacts of perfectionism in recovery Practical steps to combat perfectionistic tendencies Connection between perfectionism and substance use disorders Importance of mindfulness and self-compassion in recovery Key Moments: 00:01:14 - Introduction to the topic of overcoming perfectionism in recovery 00:04:24 - Historical and psychological perspectives on perfectionism 00:09:00 - Link between perfectionism and substance use disorders 00:11:25 - Practical steps for fighting perfectionism 00:16:22 - Invitation to join the deep dive and community for support Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery CenterNovusMindfulLife.comWe want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmindDisclaimer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Jan 27, 2025 • 41min

318: Overcoming Behavioral Addictions and Restoring Brain Health with Dr. Trish Leigh

Join us for a fascinating exploration of the brain's potential with Dr. Trish Leigh, a cognitive neuroscientist and esteemed neurofeedback practitioner. Dr. Leigh shares her valuable insights on how neurofeedback can be harnessed to combat behavioral addictions such as internet addiction, social media addiction, and even porn addiction. She explains the science of brain mapping and how identifying electrical energy patterns can reveal the underlying issues of a "strained brain" due to the flood of dopamine. Her expertise paints a vivid picture of the transformative power of neurofeedback to restore emotional regulation and improve personal relationships.We take an intriguing look at how neurofeedback functions as a mental workout, akin to exercising muscles, that boosts neuroplasticity and helps break free from rigid brain patterns often associated with addiction and erectile dysfunction. By engaging the brain in real-time activities, this approach can ease withdrawal symptoms and significantly reduce the craving for dopamine. The motivation derived from witnessing one's own brain improvement is highlighted as a powerful catalyst for change. Dr. Leigh emphasizes how this method can empower individuals to regain control and foster a healthier relationship with their own minds.In this episode, you will hear: Exploration of neurofeedback's role in treating behavioral addictions like porn, internet, and social media addiction. Insights into brain mapping and identifying electrical energy patterns to address a "strained brain" due to excessive dopamine exposure. Neurofeedback as a mental workout, enhancing neuroplasticity and reducing dopamine cravings. Supernormal stimuli and the "narcissistic bubble" impacting the brain's reward system and emotional health. Importance of detoxing from high-dopamine activities to reset pleasure pathways and improve mental wellness. Neurofeedback as a tool for fostering real-life joy and balancing dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin. Follow and Review:We’d love for you to follow us if you haven’t yet. Click that purple '+' in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:https://www.youtube.com/c/DrTrishLeighBrainRewirehttps://drtrishleigh.com/NovusMindfulLife.comEpisode CreditsIf you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Jan 23, 2025 • 16min

TAM+ Episode 53: The Missing Piece - Purpose as Your Recovery Foundation

Ever feel like something's missing in your recovery journey, even after achieving sobriety? You're not alone. In this powerful episode, hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind dive into why finding purpose is crucial for long-term recovery success. Drawing from Viktor Frankl's groundbreaking work and real-world recovery experiences, they explore how purpose acts as a compass for sustained sobriety. The hosts break down practical steps for discovering your unique purpose, addressing common obstacles, and understanding why purpose isn't just a one-time discovery but an evolving journey. Whether you're new to recovery or have been sober for years, this episode offers actionable insights for building a life filled with meaning beyond just staying sober.Download The Worksheet: FINDING PURPOSE WORKSHEETKey Topics:• Understanding the difference between goals and purpose in recovery• The role of value exploration in discovering purpose• How to identify patterns in your life that point to purpose• Why purpose evolves and changes throughout recovery• The importance of taking action before feeling motivated• How community support aids in finding purpose• Practical steps for building purpose in early recoveryTimestamps:[00:01:10] Introduction to purpose in recovery[00:06:00] Viktor Frankl's influence on recovery and purpose[00:08:13] Why purpose isn't always a lightning bolt moment[00:10:00] Value exploration as the first step[00:11:52] Starting small while dreaming big[00:13:34] Overcoming paralysis in finding purpose[00:15:47] Resources and community support for finding purposeClick Here to Join the TAM + Community. Get the support you need.Our Deep Dive is now in the community, where we discuss this episode in deep dive Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Jan 20, 2025 • 43min

317: Harnessing Digital Tools and Peer Support for Lasting Change with Judson Brewer

Dr. Judson Brewer, a pioneering neuroscientist and addiction specialist, takes us on an exploration of the human brain and its role in addiction and recovery. Dr. Brewer shares his personal journey from medical school to co-founding MindShift Recovery, where evidence-based programs challenge traditional treatments. Drawing from Buddhist psychology, he offers a fresh perspective on addictive behaviors, emphasizing the transformative power of understanding the brain's mechanisms to foster lasting change. Curiosity emerges as a powerful force in changing habitual behaviors, offering an alternative to sheer willpower. Discover how paying attention to the real-time outcomes of habits like smoking or overeating can shift brain chemistry and leverage the orbitofrontal cortex to reassess reward values. Through mindful attention, individuals can become disenchanted with detrimental behaviors by viscerally experiencing past consequences and predicting future outcomes. This understanding helps reduce the likelihood of repeating undesirable actions, guiding individuals toward more informed and positive choices.In this episode, you will hear: Exploration of addiction and recovery through brain science with Dr. Judson Brewer. Dr. Brewer's journey and the founding of MindShift Recovery. Introduction to the concept of curiosity as a tool for changing addictive behaviors. Analysis of the brain's orbitofrontal cortex in reassessing the reward value of habits. Use of digital therapeutics and peer support in addiction recovery. Disenchantment and resilience in behavior change. Proactive strategies for reinforcing positive choices and well-being. Follow and Review:We’d love for you to follow us if you haven’t yet. Click that purple '+' in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:NovusMindfulLife.comhttps://www.mindshiftrecovery.org/https://www.mindshiftrecovery.org/about-mindshift-recoveryInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/mindshiftrecovery/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/mindshift-recoveryEpisode CreditsIf you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Jan 16, 2025 • 19min

TAM+ Episode 52: Master Your Triggers: Rewiring Your Brain for Recovery

Have you ever felt like your emotions or memories suddenly hijack your hard-earned progress in recovery? You're not alone! In this episode of The Addicted Mind, hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind delve deep into the world of triggers, those sneaky culprits that can either strengthen or challenge our recovery journey.Discover the four main categories of triggers: environmental, emotional, physical, and cognitive, and learn how to identify and navigate them effectively. Duane and Eric share the groundbreaking AWARE method, a powerful tool to help you accept, watch, act, repeat, and expect when facing triggers.Plus, find out how to create your own trigger map and build a personalized response toolkit to transform your relationship with triggers from one of fear and reactivity to one of awareness and growth.Tune in and gain the knowledge and skills to master your triggers and pave the way for lasting transformation!Download The Worksheet: UNDERSTANDING YOUR TRIGGERS: A COMPREHENSIVE WORKSHEETKey Takeaways Understanding the four categories of triggers: environmental, emotional, physical, and cognitive. The AWARE method: a powerful tool to manage triggers effectively. Creating a trigger map to identify personal triggers and patterns. Building a response toolkit with personalized strategies for each type of trigger. Transforming your relationship with triggers from fear to awareness and growth. Timestamps [00:00:00] Introduction [00:02:55] What are triggers? [00:04:49] The trigger gap [00:07:19] Four categories of triggers [00:11:38] The AWARE method [00:14:13] Creating a trigger map Episode CreditsIf you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you.Follow and Review: We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:If you live in California and are looking for counseling or therapy please check out Novus Mindful Life Counseling and Recovery CenterNovusMindfulLife.comWe want to hear from you. Leave us a message or ask us a question: https://www.speakpipe.com/addictedmindDisclaimer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Jan 13, 2025 • 37min

316: Addressing Adolescent Addiction: Insights on E-Cigarettes, Vaping, and Mental Health with Dr. Bonnie Halpern-Felsher

Join us as we welcome Dr. Bonnie Halpern-Felsher from Stanford University, an esteemed expert in adolescent health, who brings her wealth of knowledge to our conversation on the Addicted Mind Podcast. We focus on the heightened sensitivity of the adolescent brain to addiction, particularly when it comes to substances like nicotine and THC found in e-cigarettes and vaping. Dr. Halpern-Felsher shares her groundbreaking research and advocacy efforts, stressing the necessity of addressing these issues during this critical phase of brain development. Her insights empower teens to make informed decisions about their health and future.Our discussion takes a close look at the complex web of factors influencing youth addiction, including the impact of stress, societal pressures, and the pervasive reach of social media. We delve into how these elements drive adolescents toward substance use as a coping mechanism, often facilitated by the enticing marketing of e-cigarettes. Despite being aware of the risks, many young people are drawn to these substances for the perceived relief they offer. We highlight the urgent need for proactive education and parental support to help teens navigate these challenges and understand the long-term implications of their choices.In this episode, you will hear: Dr. Bonnie Halpern-Felsher discusses adolescent brain development and its vulnerability to addiction. The influence of nicotine and THC on young minds through e-cigarettes and vaping. The role of stress, societal pressures, and social media in driving youth addiction. The deceptive marketing tactics of e-cigarette companies targeting young people. Challenges and strategies for quitting nicotine, including the importance of supportive environments. The concerning link between high THC usage, social media, and mental health issues like psychosis. Follow and Review:We’d love for you to follow us if you haven’t yet. Click that purple '+' in the top right corner of your Apple Podcasts app. We’d love it even more if you could drop a review or 5-star rating over on Apple Podcasts. Simply select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review” then a quick line with your favorite part of the episode. It only takes a second and it helps spread the word about the podcast.Supporting Resources:NovusMindfulLife.comEpisode CreditsIf you like this podcast and are thinking of creating your own, consider talking to my producer, Emerald City Productions. They helped me grow and produce the podcast you are listening to right now. Find out more at https://emeraldcitypro.com Let them know we sent you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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