TILT Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

Today, I’m excited to share my conversation with Ali Miller on how nonviolent communication (NVC) can help navigate co-parenting dynamics and couple relationships. When raising a neurodivergent child, there are often many opportunities for parents to disagree—whether it’s about the therapies to explore, whether or not to disclose a diagnosis to family members, or even if a diagnosis exists at all. These discussions can be tough and can definitely place a strain on the relationship. But with nonviolent communication, we can learn how to have conversations that feel like a win-win for everyone involved.Ali Miller is an expert in Nonviolent Communication (NVC) and has been a marriage and family therapist for over twenty years. In 2021, she became certified as a Clini-Coach® specializing in couples communication. As an online coach, she helps couples worldwide improve their communication and conflict resolution skills, allowing them to experience more peace, passion, and possibilities in their relationships.In this conversation, Ali and I discussed what NVC is and why it’s a comprehensive model that supports all kinds of relationships. We explored how understanding our feelings—and more importantly, the underlying needs behind them—is crucial for effective communication. Ali also emphasized the importance of empathy and self-empathy in the NVC model, and shared how to express our needs to our partners without blame or judgment (while also acknowledging that this doesn’t absolve our partner of responsibility).This conversation truly highlights how NVC can transform conflict into connection by fostering empathy and understanding between partners. I hope you enjoy it! About Ali MillerAli Miller, an expert in Nonviolent Communication (NVC), has been a Marriage & Family Therapist for over twenty years. In 2021 she became certified as a Clini-Coach® specializing in Couples Communication. As an online coach, she helps couples all over the world level up their communication + conflict navigation skills so they can experience more peace, passion, and possibilities in their relationship. Things you'll learn from this episode What nonviolent communication (NVC) is and why it’s a comprehensive model that can support any and all relationships How understanding feelings, and more importantly, our underlying needs, is crucial for effective communication The importance of empathy and self-empathy in the NVC model Why recognizing universal human needs can bridge gaps in understanding and foster true compassion and understanding How to express our needs to our partner without blame or judgment (and why it doesn’t mean our partner bears no responsibility)  Resources mentioned Ali Miller’s website Ali on Instagram Ali’s Private Facebook Group The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In (free mini-course) Feelings and Needs Cheatsheets Ali’s Podcast: Love Each Other Better 8-Week Private Coaching Program for Couples — Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs) Marshall Rosenberg and the Center for Nonviolent Communication Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships by Marshall Rosenberg Zach Morris on Nonviolent Communication and Whole Person Learning (Tilt Parenting podcast) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Strategic learning assessment psychologist Dr. Devon MacEachron provides ideas for next steps for parents after receiving a diagnosis for their child. Connect with Tilt Parenting Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Matt Zakreski, a clinical psychologist and co-founder of The Neurodiversity Collective, discusses his latest book, the 'Neurodiversity Playbook,' which aims to empower neurodivergent individuals. He emphasizes the importance of grounding conversations in neuroscience and shares practical tips for navigating everyday challenges in a neurotypical world. From advocating for better community support to using humor and purpose in parenting, this conversation offers invaluable insights into embracing neurodiversity and fostering understanding.

Speaker and author Jonathan Oliver shares his personal story of being a differently wired (ADHD and dyslexia), stay-at-home father of two children. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As a parent of a neurodivergent child, you’ve probably had to let go of the traditional timelines we’re often told our kids should follow, especially when it comes to school milestones. And that requires a big adjustment for us as parents!But what if we all took a step back and focused more on slowing down?That’s exactly what my guest today, educator and author Leslie Martino, encourages us to do. With over twenty years of experience as a teacher, homeschooler, and adjunct lecturer, Leslie has a deep passion for helping parents and educators embrace a slower, more child-directed approach to learning. She homeschools her four children and also works as an educational consultant and parent coach, and her new book, The Joy of Slow: Restoring Wonder and Balance to Homeschool Learning, is a powerful guide to this philosophy.In this conversation, we dive into how slowing down in education leads to deeper understanding and makes space for joyful, spontaneous learning. Leslie shares how creating a learning environment that values curiosity and playfulness—not just during structured learning times, but throughout the day—can foster lifelong learners. We also talk about the importance of connection and relationships in both parenting and education, and how that connection is at the heart of nurturing children who love to learn.Even if you’re not homeschooling, I promise you’ll take away so much from this episode. About Leslie MartinoLeslie Martino has over twenty years of experience teaching—as an elementary school teacher, a home educator, and an adjunct lecturer for graduate courses focused on the role of the teacher in supporting children’s individual work preferences. She homeschools her four children and works as an educational consultant, writing curricula, training teachers, and coaching parents to approach learning in an interest-based and child-directed way. She is a speaker on topics of education and motherhood and is also a contributing writer for the Wild + Free homeschooling community. Things you'll learn from this episode Why it’s critical that parents create a learning environment that values curiosity How slowing down in education leads to deeper understanding and makes room for learning to be a joyful and meaningful process? How spontaneity in learning fosters natural responses and engagement, and how to “build in” room for spontaneity in everyday life Why playfulness essential in both parenting and education, and ways to ensure education is an exploratory rather than a linear process Why connection and relationship is at the heart of effective education and fostering humans who truly become lifelong learners  Resources mentioned Leslie Martino’s website The Joy of Slow: Restoring Wonder and Balance to Homeschool Learning by Leslie Martino Leslie Martino on Instagram The Call of the Wild and Free: Reclaiming the Wonder in Your Child's Education, A New Way to Homeschool by Ainsley Arment Bored and Brilliant: How Spacing Out Can Unlock Your Most Productive and Creative Self by Manoush Zomorodi Angela Sizer and Maren Goerss on Homeschooling & Thinking Differently About Learning (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Think Differently About Learning: A Homeschool Where Parents and Children Thrive by Angela Sizer and Maren Goerss Becoming a Critical Thinker: A Workbook to Help Students Think Well in an Age of Disinformation by Julie Bogart Julie Bogart on Helping Kids Become Critical Thinkers (Tilt Parenting Podcast) Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain by Betty Edwards   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What comes to mind when you think about raising healthy kids? We often focus on physical health — things like height, weight, and nutrition. But today, we're taking a more holistic look at health with return guest, nutritionist and author Jill Castle. Specifically, e're diving into her new book, Kids Thrive at Every Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health and Happiness.In our conversation, we explore why emotional well-being is just as important as physical health, how COVID-19 has impacted kids’ nutrition, and the often-overlooked difference between feeding and eating. Jill highlights how family culture and values shape a child’s overall health and why it's so important to foster a body-neutral environment at home. We also touch on the connection between executive function and eating, plus the role screens and media play in shaping body image.Before we dive in, a bit about Jill: She's one of the nation’s leading childhood nutrition experts, blending research with practical advice. She believes children can thrive at any size and challenges us to think differently about their health. Jill is the founder and CEO of The Nourished Child®, a nutrition education platform, and the mother of four adult-ish kids.This conversation feels especially timely as our kids are bombarded with messages about how their bodies should look and behave. Now more than ever, it's crucial to provide them with a strong foundation for understanding health. I hope you enjoy this conversation with Jill Castle. About Jill CastleJill Castle is the author of the book, Kids Thrive at Every Size (Workman, 2024) and one of the nation’s premier childhood nutrition experts. Known for her ability to blend current research, practical application, and common sense, Jill believes that children can thrive at every size. With her paradigm-shifting, whole-child approach, she inspires parents, healthcare professionals, and organizations that serve children and families to think differently about young people’s health and wellbeing. Jill is the founder and CEO of The Nourished Child®, a nutrition education website and podcast for parents, and the mother of four adult-ish children. Things you'll learn How prioritizing emotional well-being is as important as physical health in children What a “whole child healthy” approach includes beyond nutrition How COVID-19 has impacted children's nutrition as evidenced by increased snacking and coping mechanisms related to food Why cultivating a body-neutral family culture is crucial How parents addressing their own food baggage and modeling healthy behaviors positively influences children Why screens and media significantly influence children's body image and self-esteem How parents can become 'size-wise' by understanding the pillars of wellness and working towards raising a healthy, happy child  Resources mentioned Jill Castle’s website (private consultation and other services) Kids Thrive at Every Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health and Happiness by Jill Castle The Nourished Child website The Nourished Child Podcast Jill Castle on Instagram Jill Castle on Facebook Nutritionist Jill Castle with the Facts About ADHD and Nutrition in Kids (Tilt Parenting podcast)   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Flex School founder Jacqui Byrne shares her vision for creating powerful learning communities for gifted and 2e students through her unique educational model. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Parent coach Zach Morris and Debbie answer a listener's question about sharing a new autism diagnosis with a 10 year old who embraces his neurodivergence but lives in a community / culture where the term "autism" has a negative connotation. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today’s conversation, I’m diving into the much-anticipated book Navigating PDA in America with the co-authors and thought leaders in the PDA space, Diane Gould and Ruth Fidler. We've touched on PDA in past episodes, but I learned so much from this book, and I’m excited to share it with you because PDA is a diagnosis bringing a lot of clarity and relief to families. As it gains traction in the neurodivergence space, the more we know, the better we can support PDAers in our communities. In this episode, we talk about the nuances of the PDA profile and how to one might determine if the identification fits, where North America stands in understanding PDA in comparison with the rest of the world, the challenges PDA individuals face in school and how they can effectively be addressed, what type of therapy is best for someone with a PDA profile, and much more. About Diane GouldDiane Gould is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker that specializes in serving autistic individuals. As the Executive Director and Founder of PDA North America, she founded the annual PDA North America conference held in Chicago that has changed the lives of hundreds of PDA (pathological demand avoidance/persistent drive for autonomy) families. She co-authored the book Navigating PDA in America with Ruth Fidler which was published in June 2024. In April 2024, Diane was diagnosed as autistic.Diane has a private practice in the suburbs of Chicago, where she serves neurodivergent children, adults and their families. Over the last 40 plus years, she has worked for both private agencies and school systems. She currently focuses her practice on providing consultation and training. She works primarily with parents and regularly attends school meetings with them. Diane loves to train educators and therapists so they can better serve their students and clients. And learning about PDA, led her to begin the new PDA movement in North America. Diane formed PDA North America at the first American PDA conference in March 2020.About Ruth FidlerRuth Fidler is an Education Consultant specializing in complex presentations of autism, Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) and emotional well-being. She worked at an all age non-maintained special school for 22 years until 2014 and has worked independently since then. Ruth worked within the school promoting interactive approaches and emotional well- being for pupils with varying autistic profiles.As well as providing training, she regularly observes and monitors teaching and learning, supporting staff to embed and refine good autism and SEND practice. She often presents at local or national events and conferences for parents and for a range of professionals. She is co-author of the following books: Understanding Pathological Demand Avoidance Syndrome in Children, Can I Tell You About Pathological Demand Avoidance?, Collaborative Approaches to Learning, Girls and Autism, Being Julia, and Navigating PDA in America. Things you'll learn How Diane and Ruth came to share their personal journeys working with neurodivergent individuals and collaborate on the book Navigating PDA in America The state of understanding and awareness of PDA in North America in comparison with the UK and Australia The factors that distinguish a PDA profile of autism, including using socially strategic ways to avoid demands and more Ways schools can better support PDA students, such as adopting flexible approaches, building trust, and recognizing the need for fluctuating capacity and recovery time Why traditional therapeutic modalities may be ineffective for PDA individuals, and what is most important for therapy to be successful and positive  Resources mentioned Diane Gould’s website Ruth Fidler’s website Navigating PDA in America: A Framework to Support Anxious, Demand-Avoidant Autistic Children, Teens, and Young Adults by Ruth Fidler and Diane Gould PDA North America PDA Society (UK) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Neuropsychologist William Stixrud PhD and Ned Johnson talk about their gamechanging book "The Self-Driven Child" and explain the importance of supporting our child's sense of control and autonomy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices