
LOVERS by shan
Lovers by Shan is an education-first space where listeners come to better understand their own intimate lives through the life lessons and expertise of others. Shan Boodram’s mission is to empower everyone to be their own intimacy expert in the bedroom and beyond by treating guests of the podcast as educators in their own right.
Past guest include Kelly Rowland who taught us about being a sensualist. Becky G who shared the importance of healthy love in an unhealthy body. Kerry Washington who warned about the dangers of keeping secrets. Kamie Crawford who taught us about the joys of breaking up. Jesse Reyez who reminded us that it's alright to admit you're the one who let a good one get away.
When we paused in 2023 we had 5.1 million listeners and 8 million YouTube views. Excited to see how many lives we can impact in 2025 with our fresh look and approach.
Latest episodes

May 14, 2025 • 54min
S2 Ep119: Death, Love and Grieving What’s Still Here featuring Alessia Cara
Nothing good lasts. Right? In this deeply moving episode, Canadian singer-songwriter Alessia Cara joins Shan Boodram to explore the connection between intimacy, loss, and the fear of death (thanatophobia). Inspired by her song "Sublime" from Love and Hyperbole, Alessia opens up about her personal journey with grief and how it shapes the way she loves and creates. Together, they dive into universal questions: How do we hold on to love while letting go of control? How does the fear of loss impact our relationships, intimacy, and even our everyday choices?
Esther Perel talks about how desire and loss can sit right next to each other. This made me think about how those ideas show up in everyday relationships: the death of connection, the slow fading of intimacy, or the fear that something we’ve built might not last.
When you zoom out, so much of how we attach, how we love, and even how we have sex is shaped by that deeper fear, what happens if I lose this? Or if I lose you? Or if I lose me in this?
Thank You Alessia Cara
http://alessiacara.com
https://www.instagram.com/alessiasmusic
https://www.youtube.com/@alessiacara
Thanks Dame for sponsoring this episode:
Dame makes products designed to enhance intimacy and connection—whether you’re with a partner or flying solo.
http://dame.com/shan
Dame Coupon: SHAN15
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Lovers Community
If you’re interested in joining the Lovers community, click here to join the waitlist:
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May 7, 2025 • 54min
S2 Ep118: Sleep Divorce: Raven-Symoné and Miranda’s Bold Relationship Move
In this week’s episode, I sit down with Raven-Symoné and her wife Miranda Pearman-Maday for a refreshingly honest conversation about love and what it really takes to sustain a modern relationship. They share why they chose a sleep divorce, and how sleeping separately has deepened their emotional bond, sharpened their communication, and brought them even closer.
This episode is a masterclass in emotional maturity and intentional partnership, an invitation to rethink what a healthy marriage can look like in a monogamix relationship.
Thank You Raven & Miranda
instagram.com/ravensymone
instagram.com/mirandamaday
Catch them on Tea Time with Raven & Miranda, a candid, cozy space where they spill everything from relationship realness to spiritual insights. Streaming now on YouTube.

Apr 30, 2025 • 57min
S2 Ep117: I Lost My Sex Drive Because He Never Did THIS ft Cree Summer
Cree Summer, the legendary actor known for her roles in A Different World and Rugrats, reflects on her journey through love and rediscovery in her 50s. She shares how a lack of emotional shelter in her marriage affected her sex drive and the transformative impact of menopause on intimacy. Cree emphasizes the importance of finding a partner who provides safety and positivity. She also discusses the empowerment of women making the first move in love, her hopes for the future, and lessons on emotional security and self-worth.

Apr 23, 2025 • 41min
S2 Ep116: Don't Waste Your Time With People Like This!
In a rare solo moment, Shan dives into the raw realities of love and relationships. She reflects on embracing imperfections that make connections authentic. The emotional journey of curating personal spaces, like a bookshelf, reveals insights into identity and aspirations. Shan discusses the impact of the pandemic on intimacy, urging growth and deeper connections. Plus, she shares crucial tools for navigating relationships, resolving conflicts, and fostering love through transparency and communication.

Apr 16, 2025 • 54min
S2 Ep115: Soul Ties and Seeking Sacred Love: B. Simone on Chastity and Demisexuality
Are you ready to dive deep into the complexities of love, faith, and identity? In this thought-provoking episode, Shan Boodram sits down with B. Simone to discuss the transformative journey of embracing chastity, understanding soul ties, and exploring the nuances of identity and connection.
While B. Simone does not identify as demisexual, Shan suggests the possibility during their candid conversation, sparking an insightful dialogue about emotional intimacy and sexual attraction. This episode unpacks key topics like:
✨ What You’ll Learn:
Demisexuality: A sexual orientation where someone experiences sexual attraction only after forming a strong emotional bond.
Soul Ties: A deep, often spiritual connection that binds two people, sometimes through shared experiences or intimacy.
Chastity: A lifestyle or mindset of aligning one’s sexual behavior and thoughts with personal, moral, or spiritual values, which may or may not involve abstinence.
Together, Shan and B. Simone explore how devotion to faith, self-love, and personal growth can shape intimate relationships and redefine what it means to truly connect with others.
Whether you’re curious about demisexuality, seeking clarity on soul ties, or inspired by the intersection of spirituality and sexuality, this episode is packed with insights that will leave you reflecting on your own path to sacred love.
🎧 Tune in now, and don’t forget to subscribe for more episodes on love, relationships, and self-discovery!
Thank You B. Simone
https://www.instagram.com/thebsimone
Let’s Try This Again: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCz67j2koC3urUkQirbvueCA
https://www.officialbsimone.com/
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Lovers Community
If you’re interested in joining the Lovers community, click here to join the waitlist:
https://www.loversbyshan.com/community
Thanks Arya for sponsoring this episode:
Arya is a service for couples that helps them break their sexual routine with the help of an intimacy concierge that serves up curated sexy scenes monthly to sign up or learn more go to
http://arya.fyi/shan

Apr 9, 2025 • 47min
S2 Ep114: What Happens to Old Love When You Have New Intimate Needs? Ft Karamo Brown
Does a change in your intimate needs have to mean a change of heart? In this episode of Lovers Shan Boodram sits down with Karamo Brown, TV personality (Karama and Queer Eye), author, and culture expert, for a raw and revealing conversation about intimacy and growth. Karamo opens up about how his intimate needs evolved through his 20s, 30s, and 40s—both emotionally and in the bedroom. He shares how these changes led to the end of a past relationship, where his partner couldn’t accept his evolving needs without taking it personally.
Now, in a thriving new relationship, Karamo reveals how he’s learned to bring his partner along as he navigates these changes, fostering a deeper connection and understanding. This episode is packed with wisdom on embracing growth, improving communication, and honoring your needs without guilt.
Karamo Brown, Lovers and Friends Podcast, Lovers by Shan, Shan Boodram, intimacy in relationships, emotional intimacy, evolving needs in relationships, intimacy advice, relationship communication, breakups and growth, thriving relationships, intimacy in 20s 30s 40s, LGBTQ relationships, personal growth, gay relationship advice, sex and relationships
Thank You Karamo Brown
https://www.instagram.com/karamo
Learn About His TV Show: https://karamoshow.com/
Get His New Children’s Book: https://zandoprojects.com/books/i-am-okay-to-feel/
Thanks Arya for sponsoring this episode:
Arya is a service for couples that helps them break their sexual routine with the help of an intimacy concierge that serves up curated sexy scenes monthly to sign up or learn more go to
http://arya.fyi/shan
Join My Mailing List
https://www.loversbyshan.com/newsletter
Lovers Community
If you’re interested in joining the Lovers community, click here to join the waitlist:
https://www.loversbyshan.com/community

Apr 2, 2025 • 44min
S2 Ep113: Partnership Over Pride: Khadeen and Devale Ellis on Defying Gender to Save Their Marriage
Are You Loyal to Your Gender or Your Relationship? Shan Boodram sits down with Khadeen and Devale Ellis, the dynamic married duo known for their raw honesty, humor, and insights on love and relationships. Together, they share how they saved their marriage by breaking free from traditional gender roles and prioritizing their partnership above all else.
Khadeen and Devale Ellis are actors, content creators, and authors of the best-selling book We Over Me: The Counterintuitive Approach to Getting Everything You Want From Your Relationship. Known for their hit podcast Dead Ass and their viral YouTube channel chronicling their family life, the Ellises have inspired millions with their relatable and unfiltered take on marriage, parenting, and personal growth. In this episode the couple talks about the controversy over Devale’s vasectomy, being called a simp, making a plate for your husband, and putting your career on pause so the family can win.
Thank You Khadeen and Devale
https://www.instagram.com/khadeeniam/
https://www.instagram.com/iamdevale/
Read or listen to their book: https://www.amazon.com/We-Over-Counterintuitive-Everything-Relationship/dp/0593577604
Thanks Arya for sponsoring this episode:
Arya is a service for couples that helps them break their sexual routine with the help of an intimacy concierge that serves up curated sexy scenes monthly to sign up or learn more go to
http://arya.fyi/shan

Mar 26, 2025 • 45min
S2 Ep112: They Liked You More When You Had No Boundaries ft Jessie Reyez
Jessie Reyez joins the podcast to celebrate her new album, Paid in Memories and to dive into the complexities of boundaries and self-respect. Together, we unpack what it means to be labeled a "villain" (by both yourself and others) for setting boundaries and standing firm in your self-worth. Jessie shares her personal journey of choosing to stay single rather than settling for less in love, reflecting on the regret of taking too much accountability in her past relationship, and embracing her love language—having her alone time respected.
We also talk about her upcoming album, Paid in Memories, which promises to be a raw and powerful exploration of love, loss, and acceptance. Don’t miss this candid and inspiring conversation that’s all about choosing yourself, even when it’s hard because self-respect is never up for negotiation.
Thank You Bumble
This episode of Lovers and Friends is presented by Bumble, where dating your way is always the right way. There’s a world where you can find love that works for you. So date now, on Bumble.
Thank You Jessie Reyez
https://www.instagram.com/jessiereyez/
Listen to Jessie’s latest music
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Lovers Community
If you’re interested in joining the Lovers community, click here to join the waitlist:
https://www.loversbyshan.com/community

Mar 19, 2025 • 42min
S2 Ep111: For Women Terrified of Being 30+, Single, and Career-Driven featuring @Deepica
In this episode of Lovers and Friends, Shan Boodram sits down with Deepica Mutyala, founder of Live Tinted and a trailblazing entrepreneur, for an honest and empowering conversation about being single, thriving in your 30s, and preparing for the love and family you deserve. Deepica shares her journey of building a successful career while staying true to her dreams of finding the right partner and creating a family. Together, Shan and Deepica discuss the challenges of dating when you’re successful, the importance of not settling, and how to embrace being single as a time to grow, reflect, and prepare for the life you truly want. Whether you’re navigating the dating world, focusing on self-growth, or manifesting your dream relationship, this episode will leave you inspired and ready to take on love and life with intention.
Thank you Bumble
This episode of Lovers is presented by Bumble who encourages you to date your way. There is a world where you can date exactly who you want, however you want. So date now, on Bumble.
Thank you Deepica
https://www.instagram.com/deepica
Get Live Tinted
https://www.livetinted.com/
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Lovers Community
If you’re interested in joining the Lovers community click here to join the waitlist
https://www.loversbyshan.com/community

Mar 12, 2025 • 52min
S2 Ep110: Lena Waithe: Don’t Have Sex With Someone If You Both Can’t Do THIS
Lena Waithe on Cuddling Over Climaxing
In this episode of Lovers and Friends, Shan Boodram sits down with Emmy-winning writer, producer, and actress Lena Waithe (Queen & Slim, Master of None, The Chi) for an eye-opening conversation about intimacy, love, and meaningful connections. Lena shares why you should never have sex with someone unless you can imagine a positive aftermath for both of you. She dives into how cuddling can create a deeper emotional bond than sex, especially when the future of a relationship feels uncertain. Lena also opens up about the power of plutonic relationships, revealing why some of her most impactful connections today are non-romantic. With all of the rumors about her love life, Lena sets the record straight and shares what truly matters to her in building authentic connections. This episode will challenge your views on love, intimacy, and boundaries in ways you won’t want to miss!
Thank you Bumble
This episode of Lovers is presented by Bumble who encourages you to date your way. There is a world where you can date exactly who you want, however you want. So date now, on Bumble.
Thank you Lena
https://www.instagram.com/lenawaithe/
Legacy Talk Podcast
https://lemonada.lnk.to/LegacyTalkWithLenaWaithehs?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAaZR0rgZOhMXnR_1HkQjiKfKa5_UUPHcXYlKFCmzjhKgXdje2qDlp8lbhmg_aem_wULmegwSQB8ct8zEmMkQfg
Join My Mailing List
https://www.loversbyshan.com/newsletter
Lovers Community
If you’re interested in joining the Lovers community click here to join the waitlist
https://www.loversbyshan.com/community