Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em Podcast

Nancy’s reporting from Portland, where tragedy struck after a man accused of domestic abuse was bailed out by an activist organization. Sarah’s reporting from her couch, where the Emmys forced her to sit through a women-pooping commercial not once but three times. They discuss the glory of Sheryl Lee Ralph bursting into song and how Jimmy Kimmel’s gag went wrong. Is “White Lotus” worth watching? Did everyone but Sarah know that Matthew McFayden, aka Tom on “Succession,” was British? And can Ricky Gervais just host all future award ceremonies, please?We turn to the dust-up at Oberlin College, where an altercation at a beloved local bakery exploded into accusations of racial profiling and protests that cratered a family business. The resulting court case led to a $36 million fine for the college, which has not paid a dime — until now. We wonder if cases like this will make administrators think twice before jumping into the fray, and we notice how enclaves of privilege often protest the loudest about other people’s privilege. In the hot box this week: Nancy praises the genius who made “Pet Sounds,” while Sarah tries to decode the sounds of her pet. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

It was hard to be a person on the Internet last week without getting sucked into the sordid drama of Don’t Worry Darling, whose premiere at the Venice Film Festival brought a carpet-bombing of memes and gossip and online buffoonery that proved just how badly we all needed a collective experience. The psychological thriller, directed by Olivia Wilde, got middling reviews but captivated the masses with backstage feuds, both real and imagined (“Q’Anon for very online people” as one Twitter user called it), culminating in SpitGate, in which Harry Styles may have spit on co-star Chris Pine, who may have also just discovered his sunglasses between his thighs at the moment Styles sat down. Gossip rags used to generate this kind of melodrama, but now we the people are the National Enquirer. Internet drama is the subject of our next discussion, as we look at a sad dust-up at Arizona State University, yet another tale in which a low-stakes but racially charged moment turns into a culture-war flashpoint that rattles young lives. This week’s New York Times magazine has a nuanced portrait of the controversy by ASU professor Sarah Viren, who experienced her own nightmare a few years ago when her partner, another ASU professor, was falsely accused of sexual harassment, which she unfolds in a different (but also riveting) NYT mag story.Also discussed: Is the publishing industry broken? What’s in the hot box? And lastly, a coda: We started this episode speaking of an ailing Queen Elizabeth, but as we write these episode notes, we wish her Godspeed. Elizabeth Alexandra Mary Windsor, Elizabeth II, died Sept. 7, 2022, at the age of 96. Her reign of 70 years and 214 days was the longest of any British monarch; she ruled for one-third of the time America has been a country, and during some of the 20th centuries most trying times. We can only hope some of you have met Brits who lived in London during WWII, who developed a tenacity and even keel that puts the truth (is that an expression?) to Keep Calm and Carry On, the slogan on the motivational posters in 1939, when Britain was threatened with massive air attacks. British friends sometimes refer to Elizabeth as “our dear queen,” a fealty Americans do not come by honestly, but we can pause and remember a figure whose like we will not see again This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

Mikhail Gorbachev’s passing reminds Sarah of one of the strangest assignments of her career: Interviewing the man who presided over the end of the Cold War … about his luggage. Meanwhile, Nancy is apoplectic about an uptick in Portland violence, including a tragic and preventable murder over the weekend.But the crux of this week’s episode is “Untold: The Girlfriend Who Didn’t Exist,” a two-hour Netflix documentary about the Manti Te’o catfishing scandal that hijacked the college linebacker’s career and reputation. This was one hell of a hoax, raising questions about con artists, our capacity for belief, and love in the age of social media. Nancy sees similarities in literary hoax JT Leroy. Sarah sees similarities in that dude from OKCupid who kept her on the phone for hours but canceled every date. Also discussed: A NYT opinion column on “the myth of maternal instinct” that places ideology over biological realities. Recommendations from the Hot Box include a podcast combining hair metal and CIA intrigue as well as a great book on the writing life, but Sarah’s ill-fated attempt to share an inspiring quote from that book includes the phrase “know your bone,” which goes over as expected ... This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

Adventures in failing to become a movie star, from chocolate "blood" squirted onto peignoirs to having a Times Square "agent" ask me to stand on his chest. Next chapter of my book, FORTY BUCKS AND A DREAM: STORIES OF LOS ANGELES, being published on Substack This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

Linda Evangelista’s appearance on the cover of British Vogue sparks controversy over beauty and fantasy. The ladies discuss "quiet quitting": Is it good, bad, a sign of progress, not a story at all? Is "House of Dragons" worth it? And how did Andrew Dice Clay get memory-holed? This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

“I Regret Being a Slut” is the provocative title of an essay published this week by writer and podcaster Bridget Phetasy, who writes, of her earlier sexual adventurism: “At the time, I would have told you I was ‘liberated’ even while I tried to drink away the sick feeling of rejection when my most recent hook-up didn’t call me back. At the time, I would have said one-night stands made me feel “emboldened.” But in reality, I was using sex like a drug; trying unsuccessfully to fill a hole inside me with men. (Pun intended.)”Nancy and Sarah agree that random hook-ups can be the junk food of sex, if not exactly what drove each of them to try to do her own filling up. They do agree on how that worked out: kinda meh. They also agree that the recent spate of doomsday articles about the sexual revolution ain’t exactly bringing back the joy. Speaking of the joy of sex, two of America’s biggest movie stars could not apparently keep their hands off each other; had two doors on their bedroom to keep out little children’s prying eyes, and at one point built a fuck hut. But all was not romance or as it seemed, according to Sarah, who’s seen all six episodes of “The Last Movie Stars,” the docu-series that chronicles the decades-long careers and marriage of Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward. Nancy wonders if Ethan Hawke, who directed the series, is mining the complicated marriage of others’ in order to figure out his own former union with actress Uma Thurman. Spoiler alert from Sarah: May-be.Hat tips to authors Stephen King and Richard Ford, curiosity about whether safe-guarding anxiety works out in the long run, and fresh-and-toasty offerings from the Hot Box! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

We look at a post-Roe landscape, as Nancy talks about a recent reporting trip to Kansas to cover a surprising vote, where citizens affirmed the right for women to have access to legal abortion. Sarah updates us on what’s happening in Texas, including the rise of crisis pregnancy centers, how abortion providers might set sail on the “lawless oceans,” and a possible uptick in male vasectomies that makes her wonder: Will male contraception ever be a thing? They both discuss their mutual love of being on the road, of driving into the story and into the unknown. This week also marks the loss of a beauty with a clear voice, Olivia Newton-John: songbird, champion for breast cancer awareness, and certified babe. After the shock of finding out Nancy has never seen the movie Grease, Sarah serves up some hand-crafted Olivia Newton-John trivia. How will Nancy fare? (Not bad.) Sarah then dives into the 6,600 (!!) pages of unsealed Depp-Heard documents that have helped push public opinion toward the Heard camp, but are the revelations really so damning? Sarah’s not so sure … Plus: this week’s hot and tasty offerings from the Hot Box!This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this or get access to bonus episodes, visit https://smokeempodcast.substack.com/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

“I don’t need any more reasons to hate the human race,” a friend said, about his aversion of watching the new Netflix series “The Most Hated Man on the Internet.” Is its subject, Hunter Moore, who revels in posting revenge porn and tweeting things like, “Fuck bitches, get money, do blow,” easy to hate? That would be a resounding yes. And yet, as Nancy and Sarah discuss, the internet of the aughts was like opening a door on a cyclone, the people who stepped inside often having no appreciation for how their lives could be wrecked with one click. Oh how things have changed since 2012 …Or have we just stepped into a different sort of storm, one that does not carry us off but keeps us walking in place? After praising the crack writing of Allison P. Davis’s essay about her ten years on Tinder, Sarah wonders if dating apps keep people on “the hedonic treadmill,” Nancy questions whether engineering one’s choice of partner axiomatically cuts out the mystery, and both agree (hope?) the pursuit of love and/or sex might be hacked in one’s favor. The girls give their hotbox picks of the week before Nancy has to jet early to a very important hair coloring appointment.*Not here for hook-ups, but we do promise a deep and mutually beneficial relationship if you become a free or paid subscriber. Episode Notes:“The Most Hated Man on the Internet” official trailer“Hunter Moore: The Most Hated Man on the Internet,” by Alex Morris (Rolling Stone) “Rude, Crude, and Coming to a Theater Near You,” story about new Tucker Max movie by Dave Itzkoff (New York Times)“Paris Hilton’s sex tape was revenge porn. The world gleefully watched,” by Constance Grady (Vox)“Tinder Hearted: How did a dating app become my longest running relationship?” by Allison P. Davis (The Cut)“Meeting online has become the most popular way U.S. couples connect, Stanford sociologist finds,” by Alex Shaskevich (Stanford News) “1,232-Swiper Poll,” stats on Tinder by Paula Aceves (The Cut)That time Sarah matched with Beto on Tinder (true story, no idea why he was on that app, or if it was even him) …Thy Neighbor’s Wife, by Gay TaleseSo You’ve Been Publicly Shamed, by Jon RonsonMax Mosley, Formula One racer and son of fascist leader Sir Oswald Mosley and Lady Diana Mitford, “who won landmark privacy case against News of the World over masochistic orgy with five prostitutes.”Choosing The Sisters: The Saga of the Mitford Family by Mary S. Lovell as an entree into the Mitford sisters, “a close, loving family splintered by the violent ideologies of Europe between the world wars. Jessica was a Communist; Debo became the Duchess of Devonshire; Nancy was one of the best-selling novelists of her day; beautiful Diana married the Fascist leader Sir Oswald Mosley; and Unity, a close friend of Hitler, shot herself in the head when England and Germany declared war.” There are many others to choose from! What’s in your hotbox?Sarah: The Last Movie Stars about Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward, directed by Ethan Hawke… whose hirsute mug is the trailer’s screenshot, as opposed to Newman’s eye-melting beauty or the creamy lusciousness of Woodward, and might you change that, HBO?Nancy: The Baseball 100, by Joe PosnanskiOutro song: “The Things We Do For Love” by 10ccWe do this podcast thing for love. And for money! And thank everyone for their new paid and free subscriptions *smoke ‘em This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

As I wrote a few months ago, with regard to true crime books, "All stories are worth telling well, but especially the difficult ones, when we need the writer's assurance as we walk down the dark passage."As someone who occasionally takes on such stories, I'm interested in how and why other true crime writers approach the work. My lead-off interview is with Kathryn Miles, author of "TRAILED: One Woman's Quest to Solve the Shenandoah Murders," about the horrific unsolved 1996 murders of two young women with Shenandoah National Park.Miles does what the best true crime writers do. She takes on the awesome responsibility of explaining murder, with compassion and clear-eyes and deeply empathetic reporting.As she writes in TRAILED, "Maybe, just maybe, when two selfless, joyful, beautiful humans die in a place, what's left behind is not the agony of their deaths, but the brilliance of their lives."Miles is the author of Superstorm: Nine Days Inside Hurricane Sandy and Quakeland: On the Road to America's Next Devastating Earthquake, among other books. More about Miles at kathrynmiles.net - N.R.Trailed: One Woman's Quest to Solve the Shenandoah Murders, by Kathryn Miles. Shot in the Heart, by Mikal GilmoreLost Girls, by Robert KolkerBlood Will Out, by Walter KirnThe Adversary, by Emmanuel CarrereColumbine, by Dave CullenDown City, by Leah CarrollI’ll Be Gone in the Dark, by Michelle McNamaraSay Nothing: A True Story of Murder and Memory in Northern IrelandThe Journalist and the Murderer, by Janet MalcomHelter Skelter, by Vincent BugliosiIn Cold Blood, by Truman CapoteCrossed Over, by Beverly LowryUnder the Banner of Heaven, by Jon Krakauer This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe

A New Yorker employee slags the company for lack of diversity on Twitter, and things get messy from there. Nancy and Sarah try to untangle the strange case of Erin Overbey, who was fired by the magazine earlier this week, following accusations that editor-in-chief David Remnick inserted errors into her own work. Nancy looks at a few other recent cases where attempts to oust the higher-ups have backfired, and we talk about how so many attempts at instant justice turn into circular firing squads. Also on deck: Is Twitter the new Gawker? Is the word “cocky” demeaning? Why does Sarah find middle names so interesting? And what up with all the last names ending in “-ola”? Sarah HepOLA shares her confused delight over Nathan Fielder’s “The Rehearsal” on HBO and Nancy ANN Rommelmann explains why baseball is America’s sport forever and always amen. But before we go, we must get to the bottom of why Adam Driver gets us so hot.Adam - we call him Adam - says he’ll buy you a drink if you become a paid or free Smoke ‘Em subscriberEpisode Notes:A list of Finnish last names, including many ending in “ola”Wilcox Park in Dutchess County, New York, also the site of Paloma Media north, a site you should peruse and subscribe to!“Small Business Owners Sound Off on Crushing Inflation,” by Nancy Rommelmann (Common Sense)“Hulk Hogan's Gawker lawsuit bankrolled by Silicon Valley billionaire” (CBS News)Nobody Speak official trailerSome corroboration that Twitter is the new Gawker, from Freddie deBoer“Rest in Power, White Ladies,” Sarah Hagi on the death of Joan Didion (Gawker)“Bloodbath at the New York Times,” Nancy Rommelmann on the defenestration of Donald McNeil Jr. “The New York Times Succumbed to Another Mob. Journalism Is Unrecognizable” and “Kids and Cowards: What Really Happened to Donald McNeil at the New York Times” by Nancy Rommelmann (Newsweek)“Words as Weapons: How Activist Journalists are Changing the New York Times,” by Nancy Rommelmann (The Dispatch)Erin Overbey June 19 tweet threadDavid Remnick, editor-in-chief of The New YorkerErin Overbey June 25 tweet threadPolitico follow-up on Overbey story confirms there were emails with Remnick that contained the two errors she was later dinged for“The NYT Enters The Youth Gender Fray And Philadelphia's Mina's World Coffee Shop Melts Down Spectacularly,” Blocked and Reported podcastDoc Marie’s bar in Portland closes in less than a week after employees demand owners turn over the business to them“The Rehearsal” official trailerNathan Fielder has job interview using 7-year-old's answers: “Why Baseball Fans Might Find the Hall of Fame Interesting!” Matt Welch and Nancy Rommelmann on Paloma Media YouTubeUnderworld and White Noise by Don DeLilloA robot-voiced trailer for White Noise film that features many images of Adam DriverOutro song: “Blue,” by The JayhawksAnd speaking of! Wonderful listener Dorothy made a Smoke ‘Em Spotify playlist! Share the Smoke with your peepsStudies show you are at least 75% more likely to be a free or paid subscriber if you sign up to be one This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit smokeempodcast.substack.com/subscribe