Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids cover image

Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids

Latest episodes

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Sep 1, 2022 • 42min

The real truth on teen dating with Steve Frissell

Step right on up if you have a teen that’s starting to date or if the sheer thought of it makes you break into a cold sweat.    There are so many questions behind the topic of dating and how to best shepherd our kids when they start down this road. Thankfully, we’re tackling it this week with Steve Frissell, an Executive Pastor at Bent Tree Bible Fellowship in Dallas, Texas.    Steve and his wife have been married for 26 years and the story he shares of their high school dating mishap is not one you will soon forget. They have six children now and Steve has an incredible word on balancing truth with grace when walking our kids through dating. He also shares ideas on conversations we need to have with our kids and thoughts on purity culture if you grew up in that era like so many of us.    When I tell you that this is a podcast you need to hear—well, this is a podcast you need to hear.    And just in case you missed it last week, the next few months we are going to be digging deep into the “real truth” behind common issues we face in our spiritual lives, parenting, and just in life generally (like dating).    Here are a few coming your way the next few weeks: Real truth in marriage with Gary Thomas Real truth in anxiety with Louie Gigglio Real truth on gaming with Grant Dixon  Real truth about the Holy Spirit with Max Lucado   I can’t wait for you to hear today’s conversation with Steve Frissell!   Resources from today's show:  Steve Frissell on Instagram Riverbend Friends A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Aug 25, 2022 • 37min

The real truth on being godly women with Brittany Ann

Today begins a new series that I’m so excited about on Pardon the Mess. 🥳   We’re going to dig deep into the “real truth” behind common issues we face in our spiritual life, parenting life, and just in life generally. We’ve been working super hard behind the scenes to get the perfect guests to encourage and instruct us in some important areas, and here’s a preview of what’s coming up:  Real truth about the Holy Spirit with Max Lucado Real truth about teen dating with Steve Frissell Real truth in marriage with Gary Thomas Real truth about anxiety with Louie Gigglio And (drum roll please), we’re kicking it off this week with Brittany Ann to talk about the “real truth” on being godly women. Brittany is an author, blogger, speaker and has a great word for us on upping our spiritual game. Don’t worry, this isn’t one of those conversations that will leave you feeling guilty or not good enough—it’s just a great reminder on small changes we can make to experience big dividends in our walk with the Lord.    I can’t wait for you to hear this conversation with Brittany Ann today, and be sure you’re tuned in the next few months as we hit some really important “real truth” topics! Oh, and share us with your friends that could use some encouragement—that would be a huge gift all around.     Resources from today's show:  Called to Act Conference, September 13-15, 2022 Fall in Love with God’s Word Riverbend Friends A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Aug 18, 2022 • 36min

Uncommon Influence with Tony and Lauren Dungy

If you love football and want to be inspired to live each day with purpose, you’re going to love today’s show with the Dungys. Tony Dungy is a football legend, playing for many years in the NFL and then coaching professionally with the Colts and Buccaneers. He’s a Super Bowl champ and now works as a football analyst for NBC.    Tony and his wife Lauren have been outspoken in their faith every step of the way as the Lord has given them opportunity after opportunity to boldly share their story. They join us today to talk about living with ‘uncommon influence.’ We discuss what it looks like to listen for God’s voice and move forward in the things with eternal impact that he has for our lives.    And for those of you wondering, yes we did talk a little bit of football and he has a great Peyton Manning story. We also get a great word on youth sports, and there ain’t a one of us that couldn’t use that.    The Dungy’s love for foster care and adoption will encourage you, and I have a feeling you’re going to walk away inspired by these sweet people and their commitment to living big for Jesus.    Resources from today's show:  Uncommon Influence Riverbend Friends A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Aug 11, 2022 • 46min

Back to school anxieties with Mia Mbroh

I remember as a kid having a range of emotions the night before school started. I would lay in bed with questions swirling like…    Did I pick the right back to school shoes?  Will my friends still like me?  Is Mrs. Smith as mean as everyone says? Will my favorite lunch table have enough seats?  Will the coach yell at me again for being the slowest to run the mile in PE? (oh wait, maybe that’s just me)   Whether or not our kids are willing to admit it, they are facing some of the same back to school jitters that we did. Even harder are some of the safety concerns they face that undoubtedly weigh on them this time of year.    Mia Mbroh is with us today and as a licensed counselor, she’s worked in private practice as well as in school settings. She’s helping us navigate some key areas of concern including school safety, friendships, bullying, and academics.   She has a good word on how our families can rewrite the narrative when it comes to what matters in school and how we will represent our faith this year.    Take a few minutes to listen to Mia’s great words for back to school, and then share it with a friend.    Also, we’re gearing up our Monday prayer podcasts in September so be sure to grab a copy of A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your Kids if you haven't already!   Resources from today's show:  Be sure to check out A Sticky Story by Mia Mbroh. You can get your copy by emailing her directly at mia@miambroh.com.  NIV Teen Study Bible A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Aug 4, 2022 • 44min

Raising Emotionally Strong Boys with David Thomas

Boys… whatcha gonna do with them? Just kidding.    But they really are unique creatures and if you’re raising one or more, you know that finding ways to help them communicate and express their feelings in a healthy way can be challenging.    David Thomas is a Pardon the Mess favorite, and he’s with us today discussing the importance of raising emotionally strong boys. Don’t miss his insight into why our boys suffer from higher rates of suicide, addiction, and pornography abuse—oftentimes because they haven’t learned to deal with their emotions in a healthy way.    Here are a few highlights: Modeling healthy communication with our boys  The three “R’s” of emotional health  How anxiety and depression present in boys What healthy relationships look like for boys When pulling away is okay… and when it’s not    David’s new book, Raising Emotionally Strong Boys is a must-read. Check it out and all the other great resources offered through Daystar Counseling! Resources from today's show:  Raising Emotionally Strong Boys: Tools Your Son Can Build on for Life Raising Boys and Girls NIV Teen Study Bible A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Jul 28, 2022 • 35min

Raising a rebel in today’s culture with Sean McDowell

I’m so happy to have Sean McDowell with us again today! We’re talking about practical ways to equip our kids to intellectually defend their faith. Sean is an author, speaker, and well-known apologist in today’s culture (just like his dad, Josh McDowell).    Sean and I talk about the confusing messages our kids are facing and how these messages are different from the ones in the past. We also talk about how to teach our kids to be bold in speaking up for their faith… with compassion and grace.    There’s so much you don’t want to miss on today’s show with Sean McDowell—he’s a big deal and you’ll love all he has to say about apologetics, preparing our kids intellectually, and his new book that is a great resource for our teens!    P.S. If you haven’t purchased our new prayer journal, now is a GREAT time to do that. We’re kicking off in September so grab your copy now!    Resources from today's show:  A Rebel’s Manifesto A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Jul 21, 2022 • 32min

When you feel like “the worst person in the world” with Scarlet Hiltibidal

Is your face melting off from the heat? We used to just call this ridiculous weather “Texas in July.”  But the odds are if you’re in the United States or Europe, you’re doing a little bit of sweating right alongside us. Not to mention, if you have kids home this summer and you didn’t plan enough activities, there’s some sweating involved with that too.    Thankfully we have Scarlet Hiltibidal with us today. She’s an author, speaker, and mom who knows what it’s like when you’re trying to be everything to everyone. She found herself feeling like “the worst person in the world” after years of hustling, striving, and trying to prove to God and everyone else that she was good enough.    Today she shares with us how important it is to come to terms with our status as sinners, and how to pivot from striving to chasing after the right things—the eternal things. She also gives us practical ways to defeat the lies we struggle with and stand on the truth we find in Jesus.    Can’t wait for you to hear from Scarlet this week! And then stay tuned because we have some awesome shows coming your way to prepare us for back to school. Stay cool!    Resources from today's show:  You’re the worst person in the world Signals: How Brain Science and the Bible Help Parents Raise Resilient Children A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Jul 14, 2022 • 37min

Sexuality: What your kids need to hear from you with Dr. Juli Slattery

A friend recently mentioned to me a podcast, Java with Juli, that has completely changed how she approaches the topic of sexuality with her kids. Fast forward to today, and Juli Slattery is joining us to talk about sexuality as it relates to our marriages, parenting, and so much more.   Now most of you know that talking about sex makes me squirm. So if for no other reason, you need to listen today because words are said in this show that have not been said in the 300+ podcasts I’ve released of Pardon the Mess. 😬   Here’s a run down of what we’re covering: Developing a deeper intimacy with your spouse Discipling your kids on the subject of sex Must have conversations with your kids around sexuality Discussions for when your kids struggle with pornography Messaging our kids are hearing from the current culture I would say this is probably a podcast to listen to solo before throwing it out for the whole fam on the way to the beach. You’ll thank me later!   Please, please take time to listen to this important podcast and then share it with others as we work to improve our conversations in our families around sexuality.    Resources from today's show:  Juli Slattery’s resources: Authentic Intimacy Ministry Java with Juli Podcast  God Sex and Your Marriage book Finding the hero in your husband A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Jul 7, 2022 • 38min

When your kids trigger you with Sissy Goff

I hope everyone had an amazing 4th of July! We spent the last week in Boston on vacation and it was amazing, exhausting, and everything you can imagine from spending a week with your kids in small spaces. That makes today’s podcast especially timely (for me at least).     Today we have the privilege of hearing from Sissy Goff, a fan favorite when it comes to understanding our kids. Sissy is the Director of Child and Adolescent Counseling at Daystar Counseling in Nashville, Tennessee, and a dear friend to our show.   Sissy is unpacking some important topics to consider during the summer months, and a few issues that are probably cropping up in your home as well as mine.    Here’s a few of the things we discuss: Why our kids trigger us and how to manage it What our kids need from us this summer How to instill confidence in our kids Ways to help our kids with friendships Teaching responsibility  Ideas on entitlement and discipline   I’m so grateful you’re with us this week. You’re going to love what Sissy has to offer.   P.S. I’m so excited that our 2022-2023 prayer journal is out! Grab your copy now so you’re ready to hit the new school year running when it comes to praying for our kids. We will be praying the Psalms over our kids and it’s going to be amazing!    Resources from today's show:  More from Sissy Goff: Instagram  Raising Boys and Girls Raising Boys and Girls Podcast  A Parent’s Prayer Guide: Key Psalms to Pray Over Your KidsOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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Jun 30, 2022 • 47min

“Best of” with David Thomas and tips for raising boys

This week as a part of our “best of” Pardon the Mess interviews, David Thomas is with us to talk about all things related to our boys.    Picture this: you’re picking up your son from the first day of school after waiting to hear all about his day. Even as he’s closing the car door you begin asking the most critical of questions like... How is your teacher? What friends are in your class? Who did you meet? Did you talk to any girls? What did you have for lunch? Are you tired? Why are you so quiet? Were the kids mean to you?    Apparently unaware of the millions of questions swirling in your mind, your son simply responds that his day was “good.” I feel your pain (like really feel your pain), and David Thomas from Daystar Counseling in Nashville does, too.    David talks with us about our boys’ developmental stages: explorer (0-4), lover (5-8), individual (9-12), wanderer (13-17), warrior (18-23). We also discuss the best ways to communicate and connect with our boys, which apparently does not involve barraging them with questions the second they get into the car (my bad).    So glad you’re with us today.    Resources from today’s show:   Raising Emotionally Strong Boys by David Thomas Helping Moms Raise Confident Daughters Every Home for ChristOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.comPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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