Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids

If you haven’t been introduced to Carlos Whitaker, today’s your day! Carlos is a dynamic author, speaker, storyteller, and hope dealer who is in high demand as a podcast guest. You’re about to see why!    Our conversation today surrounds his new book, How to Human. We’re considering what it looks like to get back to the very basics of who God created us to be. Living in a world filled with anxiety, broken relationships, and divisiness has caused us to lose touch with each other. . .  and with God.    Tune in today as Carlos and I explore our humanity through the eyes of Jesus and consider practical ways to recalibrate our lives.    Resources from today's show:  How to Human by Carlos Whittaker Human Hope podcast with Carlos Whittaker  She is Confident in Healthy RelationshipsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Thirty-eight times in Ecclesiastes Solomon refers to our lives as “hevel.” Solomon is trying to paint the picture that our lives are just a vapor, here one moment and gone the next. Knowing this means we have the opportunity to stop chasing the things on earth and instead pursue God above all else and live for the eternal.   This is our prayer for our families this week. That we can appreciate the brevity of life and live intentionally and interruptible as families. We’re also praying our kids learn to live purposefully knowing their hope is in the Lord, not in wealth, popularity, or status.    Join me this week in asking God to teach our kids to define success the way God does. Each day is a gift, so let’s use our time wisely.    P.S. We would be so grateful if you’d consider sharing Pardon the Mess with a friend. Encourage those you know and love to join us in praying each week by forwarding this email or sending a link to the show. Thank you! Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

I’ve got to be honest here–today’s show is so enlightening that I’ve been quoting Kara Powell everywhere I’ve been speaking since we taped this conversation.    Kara is Executive Director of the Fuller Youth Institute, and based on her extensive research and knowledge she’s sharing the three pivotal questions our kids are asking. (Spoiler alert: these are some of the same questions many of us are still asking as adults.)    Combining research and biblical truth, Kara gives us practical ways to speak into these three questions while considering the unique characteristics marking this next generation. She also has a few great ways to give our kids a “sticky faith” that follows them all throughout adulthood.   Take a few minutes to listen today, because Kara’s research combined with biblical truth is the perfect combination for answering your kids' deepest questions.    Resources from today's show:  3 Big Questions That Shape Your Future by Kara Powell She is Confident in Healthy RelationshipsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

The things we desire the most direct our days and determine our priorities. Knowing this, it’s important to get it right when it comes to what we desire and how we spend our lives fulfilling our deepest wishes.   This week we’re praying that our kids desire the things God desires for their lives. Psalm 37:4 is arguably one of the most powerful verses God has used in my life to date (I’ll share more on today’s podcast), because he taught me how incredible our lives can be when our victories, achievements, and successes line up with His.     Join me in praying this week for our kids to dig deep to find God’s plans and desires for their lives, pursuing those things at all cost.    Lots to pray for this week. Don’t miss it!   P.S. We would be so grateful if you’d consider sharing Pardon the Mess with a friend. Encourage those you know and love to join us in praying each week by forwarding this email or sending a link to the show. Thank you! Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Toni Collier is with us today talking about the brokenness we feel in this world and how to work through it in our own lives as well as the lives of our children.   I had never met Toni before this conversation, and we had an instant connection that I’m sure you’re going to feel too. She’s vulnerable and authentic in the hardest places she’s faced in life, and also hilariously funny and wise. Here’s a few of the topics we cover: Narratives we believe that keep us from healing Knowing the difference between being a fan of Jesus versus a follower Affirming our kids in the very midst of their brokenness Overcoming the need to appear perfect  And a little behind the scenes tidbit: Toni recorded this conversation in her car on the side of the road because she was late after a dentist appointment. You would never know because she is on 🔥, but it made for some hilarious banter.    Resources from today's show:  Brave Enough to be Broken by Toni Collier Still Coloring Podcast with Toni Collier Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Did you pick a word of the year for 2023?    I don’t always do it, but this year I knew “pause” was my word because it kept coming to my mind whenever I would hear someone else mention their own word. The last few months I’ve felt the Lord lay it on my heart that I needed to learn to slow down and wait on him. Said differently, I need to learn to “pause” before . . . . .    I speak I judge I accept I respond I plan I react I engage I assume   Isaiah 30:18 says, in part, “blessed are those who wait on the Lord.” So if blessing comes from waiting on God, I’m pretty confident that my year of “pausing” won’t go to waste.    This also goes along perfectly with Psalm 66 and our focus on praying for our kids to communicate well with the Lord. We’re not only praying they take all of their needs to Jesus, but also that they learn to wait on him and allow God to work in their lives before moving forward in their own plans. It’s “pausing” so that God can do the things that only God can do.    Lots to pray for this week, so “pause” for a minute and pray with me!Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

As we’re kicking off the new year, it’s a perfect time to evaluate what’s working well in our parenting, and what may need a few tweaks. It’s being intentional in asking God to reveal what he wants our families to be about, and ensuring we’re doing the things that will make this happen.    Pastor Andy Stanley and his wife Sandra are here to talk about all of this and more. Having grown children, they have an amazing perspective on figuring out what your “it” is in parenting, and charting the course accordingly.    I can’t tell you how much I love the part of our conversation where we discuss the dangers of letting our ego impact our parenting. And then there is a good reminder that our behavior—not our words—has the greatest impact on our kids. Yikes!    Don’t miss this and so much more from Andy and Sandra Stanley. Happy New Year!   Resources from today's show:  Parenting: Getting It Right by Andy and Sandra StanleyPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

It’s a brand spanking new year and the perfect time to jump in and join us as we pray over our kids.    We’re kicking off 2023 by praying purity over our kids, focusing on Psalm 119. I can’t imagine a more significant thing to pray for our kids than purity in all the different scenarios our kids face each day.    Listen in as we discuss biblical purity and praying for it in our kids’ sexual relationships, what goes into their bodies, what they look at online and listen to, and the standards by which they live their lives.   But praying purity also deserves a reminder that God brings grace and forgiveness to each of us when we miss the mark. That’s the beauty of a God who loves us (and our kids) so much that he wants purity to be more about our relationship with him, than a one-time accomplishment where we either hit the mark or miss it.   Lots to pray for this week. Don’t miss it!   P.S. We would be so grateful if you’d consider sharing Pardon the Mess with a friend. Encourage those you know and love to join us in praying each week by forwarding this email or sending a link to the show. Thank you! Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

As we wrap up 2022, I’m finishing the year the same way I started it by sharing a few of the things I wish I had known as a younger mom.    I try not to live with regrets, but I also know the value that comes by taking inventory in our parenting and acknowledging the areas of growth as well as the struggles.The four things I’m sharing with you today began with an article I wrote several years ago from the perspective of “the oldest mom on the playground.” Since then, I’ve had opportunities to share these parenting truths to various groups, and the Lord has given me even greater clarity that I pray will encourage and challenge you.   I have no doubt that your social media feeds (like mine) are packed with all kinds of weight loss and exercise challenges for a physically healthier 2023. But I would also encourage you to avoid “back-burnering” (assuming that’s a word) your parenting and instead take this week to consider what’s working, what’s not, where you might need to be encouraged, and where you need to encourage others. I’ll start us off with today’s podcast on the four things I would tell my younger parenting self.   I would be so grateful if you would not only take a minute to listen, but then also share it with the other parents you’re walking alongside with each day.   P.S. As we wrap up this year, I’m praying that Pardon the Mess will reach more and more parents. One way you can help us do this is to leave a review on iTunes or wherever you listen to podcasts. It would be a great blessing if you could take just a minute and do that for me today! So grateful 💕   Resources from today's show:  Christian Parenting Year End GivingPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.” Psalm 91:1   We have a negative connotation around the idea of living in the shadows. We want to avoid raising kids in the shadows because it feels unknown, overlooked, or even worse: insignificant. Yet so often what the world calls “successful” is not God’s definition of success. And living with platform and worldly significance comes at a cost we often fail to consider.    This week we’re praying Psalm 91 over our kids, and asking God to reveal the beauty of shadow living—but only when it’s in the shadow of the Almighty. In this shadow is where we find  God’s love and protection. In his shadow is where we find a nearness to God not present anywhere else, simply due to the sheer proximity required to walk in God’s shadow.   This is our last week of 2022 to pray over our kids. Please don't miss it. Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy